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'feels like falling in love'

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"Fuck sake..."

You awoke to the feeling of soft covers tangled around your ankles and the feeling of a subtle chill clawing its way in through the small gaps between the window frames. You'd slept in the most peculiar position and had awoken to a pulling sensation in the side of your neck. Not to even begin to talk about the ache that thumped in your legs from the events of last night. You felt the twinge in the delicate muscles as you shifted slightly, stretching out your legs. Despite the aggravating pain which you knew would only wind you up as the day continued, it brought a little sparking flutter to your chest as you remembered just what and who was the blame.

You rolled over, using all your might to shift your body to the other side of the bed and flopped down onto the mattress, star shaped across the entirety of the mattress. Abruptly, you sat up, eyes scanning around the bed.

"Peter?" you called out through broken vocal chords. You massaged your neck gently as you waited for an answer, feeling the impossible dry spot at the back of your throat that could never be tamed no matter how many times you swallowed. You sat there for a moment and listened, waiting for a single shift of movement, but from the bedroom you heard nothing.

You called out again, still hearing nothing. At the sound of the continuous silence you jumped up and out of bed, suddenly realizing you where still completely naked. Scrambling around like a new born calf, you managed to piece together a shirt and some boxers you grabbed from Peter's duffel bag that was still sitting by the bedside. As you slid the material over your head, you became engulfed in his scent once again, not that it didn't linger in the fabric of the pillows, but on a piece of clothing that soully belonged to him, it was so much stronger.

After straightening out the shirt and stepping into the boxers, you headed out onto the landing, calling out his name again. Finally, this time you got a response; "In here," he called out, voice echoing from the living room.

You tread carefully, trying not to burst through the living room door and make it obvious to the reality that being unknowing as to where Peter was made you slightly anxious. Where you really becoming that attached to him already?

"Hey," Peter smiled as you entered, turning from where he was sitting to look over at you, "are you okay?" he asked as his gentle eyes scanned you up and down.

"Yeah, I'm okay," you nodded as you stood there, rubbing your hands up and down your thighs, "are you okay?"

"Yeah, sorry I wasn't there when you woke up, Ned's been blowing up my phone all morning and I didn't want it to bug you..." he trailed off slightly, voice growing shallow as he watched you, still just standing there. For a moment he caught you in an act that was glazed over with such innocence. There was a new light being shone down on you as though you where a deer in the headlights, and Peter wasn't quite sure why, but he developed quite the regard for such.

"Uh, yeah, yeah," you answered jaggedly, "is he okay?" you swallowed hard, trying to clear the dry spot in your throat as you wandered over and took a seat beside him. You weren't sure why you were acting this way, maybe it was the overcrowded sense of being exhausted that was crawling its way back into consciousness, or maybe you where terrified over the concept of feeling as though you now needed Peter to survive.

"Yeah, yeah," he answered softly, eyes still locked on your figure as you perched on the couch beside him. As you sat there for a moment you could see the distant cloud that gathered in patches above his head, his eyes dimming to a faded grey. There was sadness seeping into every crack.

"Peter, what aren't you telling me?" your hands slid between his fingers, lifting his arm into your lap as you shuffled closer, watching as his eyes drifted towards your face. Peter was filled with such innocence, he truly was a submissive. But, putting that fact aside, you could see the way he was still such a child on the inside, as if he was keeping the truth from you as to not disappoint you. Seeing that youth like look swirling in his eyes made your heart ache for him.

"Ned's kind of in some trouble and, well... He needs me. He needs me back home," his eyes widened as his shoulders tensed as he prepared to attempt to convince you into letting him go, as though you were a selfish mother keeping her son locked inside the walls of their home, "he never tells me he needs me unless he means it, I promise Y/N I really don't wanna go but he's in trouble and-"

"Peter, you're rambling again, just slow down, okay?" you smiled softly, cradling his hands in your lap. He calmed after a moment or two, biting the inside of his cheek nervously, "Peter, if Ned needs you that's 100% understandable, we can cut this trip short, I don't mind, the store isn't going anywhere. We can always come back another time."

"Thank you," his lips curled into a soft smile, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you in close for a hug. As you leaned into him gently, you felt something strange radiate from his skin like a bad smell. There was something in Peter that he clearly wasn't sharing with you, but you weren't going to pressure him into saying anything, you weren't even sure if this feeling was right. But, if it was, then you where worried for him. It was something so deep and dark, it was heavy, as though he was carrying the weight of a mountain on his shoulders. It was the moment you realised that maybe Peter had secrets he too, wasn't sharing.

"I really don't wanna go," his eyes dampened with sadness as his mind flashed through the images and fantasies he was more than excited to explore with you this weekend, "I'm really sorry."

"If you apologise one more time, Parker, you're toast."

Admittedly you where smitten with slight disappointment as you arrived home from your trip. You meant what you said about the store not going anywhere, and it was completely fine that Peter had to come home, it was understandable and you where appreciative over the reality that Peter cared about his friends. You were just a little cast down about not being able to have Peter all to yourself for another day or two.

You had to admit to yourself, grovel open the doors you had been keeping locked for so long, that you were indeed becoming quiet attached to the doe eyed brunette. It was hard to accept, those chains that had been wrapped around those doors for so many years become hesitant with rust and dis-acknowledgment, believing in truth that they may never open again. But here you where, letting them fly open like the wings of a hummingbird and welcome in all of gods wonders.

"I really am sorry, about cutting the trip short," Peter apologised for the hundredth time as he slung the strap of his bag over his shoulder, slamming the car door shut as he did so.

"Peter would you stop? It's fine," you chastised with a grin, "you really need to listen to me when I tell you things are okay," you walked around to the passenger side of the vehicle as Peter stalked over with meek eyes to join you, a compromised look on his face as you swung your arm over his shoulder, "you care about Ned, as do I, he's a great guy. I think it's great that you look out for your friends."

"Well it's kind of the bare minimum, don't you think?" he shrugged politely, tilting his head to the side to see the look on your face, agreeing with a nod.

"So, you never did tell me what was going on with him, is everything alright or has he been kidnapped?" you half chuckled, pressing your nimble hand against the glass door of your apartment complex and holding it there for Peter to pass through, "cause if he has and you need your suit I hope you don't mind the generously sized hole ripped into the crotch-"

"-Hey, you and I both know that was your fault," Peter chuckled, a blush fanning over his pale cheeks.

"My fault?" you gasped, "Peter Parker how very dare you blame me in the face of your crimes!"

Your laughter echoed throughout the stairway as you climbed your way to your apartment level, sliding your hands into one anothers comfort as you reached the top. A feeling of serenity washed over you suddenly as the cradling effect your hands took upon one another shone through. You became almost humbled in the lighting of simplicity, that even the smallest of gestures made your skin tingle and heart flutter. Feeling the heat from his skin brought you all kinds of hope.

Reaching the top of the stairwell, you turned your head to glance down the hallway only for your eyes to meet something you weren't expecting to see.

Back to the wall, seated on the floor outside of Peter's door was a woman, around your age with long blonde hair, fine skin and neat composure. She turned to face the both of you, eagerly walking towards her and you noticed the expression that grew on her face as she locked eyes with your gaining figures.

"Who's that?" you whispered to Peter softly, watching as she clambered to her feet. Dressed in a white leather jacket and loubitons you could already smell the privileged rich bitch oozing around her aura. Peter shrugged as you gained on her prescense, slowing down to an eventual stop outside of your apartment door, coming to face the stranger.

"Peter? Is it really you? Oh my god, it is!"

Who in the frolicking fuck is this bitch?

"Uh..." Peter replied, nerves bubbling in his chest as his hand squeezed yours gently, "do I know you?"

Your heart pounded softly in your chest, your ribs taking a low blow to the frame as you admired her features, trying to comprehend her stature. From standing where you stood you marked down one of three things; she knew Peter, but Peter didn't know her. Red flag? Possibly.

"... Really? You don't remember?" you watched again as her face fell with sudden disappointment. Raising your brows, you tried not to let the inner grade A hellcat flow into your facial expressions as you continued watching her, almost fascinated by the scene playing out before you. You realised Peter wasn't your property, he wasn't an antique lamp that had been passed down through generations and was now worth more than your left kidney should it be sold on the black market, nor was he a china doll that would break if you so much as looked at it for too long. He was his own person who had a life outside of yourself, but right now the blood in your veins was boiling.

"I-I'm sorry," Peter turned to look at you, just as confused as you where and you watched the simplicity of Peters form flow into his centre, the pure submissive innocence of his being, "I don't remember you."

"I'm Stacy Solumn? We where in pre-school together?" taking a step forward, you watched as her hand breached outwards slightly, gracing the skin of Peter's knuckles. Peter seized to move, only drawing his hand backwards a little, feeling the tension beginning to rise.

"I'm really sorry but I- I really don't know who you are?" you could have sliced the pressure in the air with a butter knife, the sensation of deprivation crawling up the skin of your neck as she continued to stare at Peter. Yes he wasn't your property, but you where feeling mighty overprotective right now. There was something here that just didn't seem right, whether it was your overpowering sense of entitled jealousy taking over, you didn't know.

"Well no matter," she smiled awkwardly, "I just thought I'd come and say a quick hello, I've just moved into the apartment upstairs and your friend, Ned is it? He informed me that you where living here."

"Ned told you?" Peter tilted his head slightly, "you know Ned?"

"Y-yeah," she nodded and you watched her claws make the final brawl, sinking deep into Peter's skin, "we actually met online, it was kinda funny," oh god her voice was making your stomach churn, "he likes psychics and so do I, we got to talking and here I am," she shrugged playfully, insinuating her innocence only further to glaze over whatever it was that was hiding beneath. No one was this cheery.

You felt the shift in the air as Peter's hand slipped from your own and the one perfect peace that was held between you slipped into an abyss. You'd seen Peter when he got excited and you hated to admit it, but there were sparkles of light shining down through his eyes the minute he realized they had something in common, "wait, oh this is all adding up now," he turned to face you with a broad smile on his lips, you, not so courageously, returning the favor. You didn't mean to be so salty, you couldn't help it. "Ned mentioned you months ago, well, not you specifically, but he said he was talking to someone, and that he 'sure liked her because she was into physics', that's like finding a needle in a haystack!"

"Uh, Peter?" after watching the scene play before you for longer than you would have anticipated, you stepped forward, "as wildly captivating as this conversation is, I really think we should head inside."

"Oh... okay," Peter nodded softly causing your stomach to flip. There where few people you could read so fluently as though you were born with the gift of expressional literature, but Peter you could read so clearly. Now you felt as though you were dragging him away from something when moments before he would have moved mountains just to stay luke warm on your heels.

"It's fine, really. I live just upstairs, I could always come and visit, anytime."

"Sounds great, bye bye now," taking Peter by the hand you fondled with your keys, turning around to face your door as you slid the small piece of metal into the lock. You ground your teeth together as she walked away, jaw clenched in envy. This isn't how you ever expected yourself to react, and needless to say, neither did Peter.

"What was that all about?" You knew the question was going to be bestowed upon you the minute the door was closed. You could have replied with a cocky tone, "I could ask you the same thing," but you chose to reside.

"Nothing," you sighed, playing the childish game involuntarily but not completely blinded by it. There most certainly was something wrong, yet you weren't sure what, but you weren't making a great deal of effort to hide it.

"Really? Are you sure? Because your hearts racing and your palms are sweating."

You turned to face Peter with a look of plainness, who was standing across from you on the other side of the living room. It still shocked you; the extent of his abilities. Even from where he was standing he could sense the way your body operated, and you knew it was about to become a hell of a lot more challenging to lie to him.

Running your tongue through your cheeks you bounced nervously on your heels, turning your head to the couch before taking a seat on the arm, "I'm sorry, I'm just not fond of new people."

There was a moment of silence as Peter watched you from across the room, as if waiting for you to give him an honest answer instead of blathering out bullshit.

"Are you jealous?"

"Fuck off." You stood from the couch at the passing of his words and headed for the kitchen.

"No I'm serious," he chuckled, following close on your tail, "is someone feeling a little... overprotective?"

"Don't flatter yourself."

"Oh I wasn't," he complied to your tone and settled at a distance, watching as your poured yourself a drink, back turned to face him. You sipped the water you poured leisurely, trying to collect some words to form a reasonable answer that wasn't about to make you sound like a complete fool.

Setting your glass down you turned to face Peter once more, his eyes giving you no where to run.

"My mother always used to say that you don't deprive a woman of her wit the same way you don't take a toy from a child, I never understood what she meant until I met you." The words you spoke didn't make sense to Peter, at least you wouldn't expect they would, but to you they were now reading clear. "The whole depriving woman of wit thing it's just biblical shit, but the child and the toy thing, that makes sense to me now. Peter, I've grown overly fond of you and I don't want that taking away from me, there, I said it."

Peter stood for a moment, soaking in the words you had spoken. For some people it might have been easy to express feeling so diligently, but for you it was so simple, and Peter could see that. Taking a step forward his hands embraced you, pulling you close to cradle you in his arms. You rest your head against his chest softly, listening to the sound of his beating heart.

"I know you think you're some kind of monster. But you're not."

How could he possibly know exactly what it was you had always needed to hear? Wrapping your arms around him you pulled him closer, nuzzling impossibly deeper into his chest.

"You're not the only one who has demons, we all do. I'm not going anywhere and I want you to understand that, please listen to me when I say I'm not going anywhere."

You closed your eyes for a moment as you listened to him, the anchor in your chest relieving itself of the chain, dropping down to your core. As the moment passed you took a step back, placing your hands on his shoulders and looking up to face him. He searched through your eyes for some answer, so query, some relief of some kind, but instead he found fight in the sense that you weren't finished convincing him just how troubled you really were.

"If I can understand that you're not going to go anywhere then I think you too need to understand just how hard it's going to be for me to believe you."

"Have I given you some kind of reason not to trust me?"

"Not you, just everyone else I've been with," you sighed, moving your hands from his shoulders to cradle his warm cheeks. You watched his eyes soften as they looked down at you with adoration. You knew he had the capacity and the capability to understand, but to what extent? There was still so much you hadn't unpacked with Peter, there was still a chance you could scare him off.

"Y/N," your voice sounded like heaven on his lips right now, it was all you wanted to hear, some kind of confirmation that he still recognised you for who you were, "I know you think you're the worst I've ever seen, or should a time come when you show me how awful you can really be, but believe me I've seen worse."

"I find that hard to believe."

"Well try, because it's true," nibbling the inside of his cheek with angst, he brought your hands away from the safety of his skin to cradle them between his fingers, "I've seen so many horrible things, before you came along. If I wasn't waking up in a sweat with a mess between my legs," he smiled cheekily, "then I was waking up to the sound of my own screams," and then the smile faded.

"Peter, I'm so sorry."

"Don't be," he shook his head, shifting on his feet, "what happened in the past stays in the past. What I'm trying to say is that every second I spend with you I'm healing, and I want to try and make sure you heal too, from whatever it is you may be struggling with, day and night, I'll be here, no matter what."

We'll see about that, there's still time.

It wasn't going to be your goal to try and break Peter, but until you'd unleashed what was hiding deep inside you, you were holding back the reins on completely trusting Peter. You had every right to, and it wasn't a lie to say you really hoped Peter wouldn't give you reason to ever stoop back into a black hole of depression again, but there was still a man you were yet to meet who stood by his word completely.

"If it makes you feel any better, I don't expect you to trust me right now. But I do have something to ask you."

"And what is that?" You tilted your head slightly, chest suddenly sparking with excitement. After all you had just laid out on the table, there was still a side to Peter that made you find hope even in the darkest of times. You wanted to give him your all, trust him with your heart and soul. You just didn't have the tools to give him everything yet.

"We still haven't had a real date yet," he smiled, the look of serenity in his eyes, "so, I was thinking we could have dinner at a real fancy restaurant tonight, make our relationship official?"

"Peter I'm flattered, but isn't that going to be really expensive? Where do you expect to-"

"Ah, ah, ah," he bumped in, pressing a finger to your lips to prevent you from rambling on. "I have it all figured out, you just need to worry about showing up."

You were truly flattered.

"Thank you," your brows softened as you removed his finger from your lips to speak and he allowed you to make that move. Standing on your toes you leaned upwards, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. The gesture made your heart flutter; Peter was willing to arrange everything and allow you to sit back and relax? You'd never experienced such gratitude.

"Oh no that just won't do," he shook his head, cradling your chin with his index finger, lifting your head and bringing his lips down to kiss you softly.

Was this true love? You were about to find out...

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Sorry this chapter was a little shorter than usual, sleeping plan is all over the place so haven't had the energy to write anything lol. I have a lot planned for this book so stay tuned! Big things are coming...