"That was fun." Yoongi says to Jimin as they enter their flat.

  "Yeah. It was nice." Jimin says forcing his voice to sound animated.

Yoongi nods a small smile playing on his lips.

  "I'm gonna go to my room." Jimin says.

"You okay?" Yoongi asks reaching for Jimin's hand.

He turns away before he can touch him. "Yeah. I'm just tired. Y'know?"

Jimin walks away to his room before Yoongi can answer.

  "C'mon Jimin. We had a goodnight. Lets not end it like this." Yoongi says.

  "End it like what? I'm tired. So I'm going to bed. Goodnight." Jimin says disappearing into his room and closing the door.

Yoongi sighs going to his room and changing his clothes.

Of course tonight was too good to last.

Jimin removes his clothes changing into his more baggier ones.

Jimin feels nauseous as he lies down in his bed curling into a ball.

Don't make me repeat myself again Jimin.

He shuts his eyes tightly wanting nothing more that to disappear completely.

Stop being ridiculous. It's the least you can do after breaking the rules.

  "Shut up." Jimin says to himself through clenched teeth. "Leave me alone."

  "Jimin?"
 
  "No." Jimin says covering his ears.

Your so fucking pathetic Jimin. Such a fucking waste of space.

  "Jimin look at me."

  "Leave me alone." Jimin repeats his eyes still shut tightly.

You Don't deserve the air you breathe Jimin. Every breath you take is just another burden to everyone around you.

  "Stop. Stop." Jimin repeats over and over again his hands pressing harshly into his skull.

Yoongi takes Jimin's wrist trying to pry his hands from his ears.

  "Please leave me alone." Jimin whimpers to low to be talking to Yoongi.

  "Jimin. It's me." Yoongi says. This has never happened before and Yoongi would be lying if he said he wasn't absolutely terrified.

You ruin everything Jimin. That's all you are good for. Ruining everything.

  "I'm sorry." Jimin whimpers.

  "Jiminie. Jimin look at me. It's okay." Yoongi says.

Jimin continues to shiver and whimper things Yoongi doesn't understand.

Yoongi climbs into the bed holding Jimin as close as possible.

  "Shh...Jimin it's okay." Yoongi says his tone soothing.

Jimin's breathing increases and he starts to hyperventilate.

  "Calm down Jimin. Its okay." Yoongi says keeping his voice as gentle as possible.

Jimin's pants turn into body racking sobs as he grips Yoongi's arm.

Yoongi shushes Jimin running his fingers through his brown locks soothingly.

Jimin's sobs come out strangled as he tries to breath through them. His throat so closed it feels almost impossible to take a full breath.

  "It's okay." Yoongi continues to say as Jimin begins to calm down.

  "I'm sorry." Jimin cries into Yoongi's chest.

  "It's okay Jimin." Yoongi says rocking slightly, still running his fingers through his hair.

Jimin's breathing decreases but is still uneven as he holds onto Yoongi.

They stay like this until Jimin's body goes limp against Yoongi's his grip on his arm loosening.

Yoongi sighs relaxing his body and leaning his head against Jimin's.

Before Yoongi knows it he drifts off into a light sleep.

***

Its been three weeks since Jimin's panic attack and if it was possible to look worse than he did before Jimin did.

His skin is so pale that the red bags under his eyes stick out like a sore thumb.

Yoongi has never seen him so sad and frail and it just broke his broken heart all over again.

Yoongi grew worse with Jimin. At first it was just sometimes. Like every other day he'd feel like shit and want to kill himself but then it got better. But then it stopped getting better. Now the good days were only every other day and he always felt like at any moment he could die and there wouldn't be anyone there to care. Jimin was wrapped up in his world and he's pushed all his friends away to the point they don't bother with him at all anymore.

They both feel so down that they can't even imagine being happy. Ever.

Yoongi wishes he could leave. He wishes he could just get up and leave everything behind him and just forget about this life.

The cuts on his wrists just get deeper and his thoughts darker.

And he feels like Jimin sees right through him. Like he's standing right in front of him crying for help and he doesn't even hear him.

There was never a good day between the two of them no matter how hard they tried.

Maybe if Yoongi did leave it'd be best for the both of them.

Even if it wasn't the best. What's the point in trying anymore?

***
Like a light💡