I drink to wash
away the pain

Type: heartbreak / angst
Word Count: 715
Published: October 23, 2017

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You felt the cold marble table top under your elbows as your hands roughly gripped the hair at your scalp. Your throat was burning and you felt your eyes getting puffy and irritated.

You could still taste the bitter liquor on your lips when you finished your fourth glass, before getting angry again and throwing the glass at the wall beside you.

You already broke two glasses already.

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

The sudden and quick pounding on your door spiked a pain in your head. Somehow, you still had enough energy to stand up from your kitchen island to go open the door.

After stumbles and looking through your sleepy eyelids, you open the door to a very tense and worried Tom.

Neither of you could say anything to each other. You just looked up at Tom's wide eyes and turned around to go back to your kitchen.

"(Y/n) what happened?!?" Tom questions as he followed you into your house. You returned to your stool at the kitchen island and pushed away the empty glass from you reach.

"He's a fucking bitch, that's what happened." Your words slurred a little as you mumbled your response. When Tom entered the kitchen, his nose immediately scrunched to the smell.

"Have you been drinking?" Tom's voice asks in a whisper.

"He thinks...!" You ignore his question. "That he can just go see other motherfUCKING GIRLS!!" You slam your hands on top of the marble. "And then come back to me saying it was nothing."

You shrug at the end as if it didn't bother you, but it bothered you a lot. The alcohol swimming in your blood was taking over and you wished it stayed there until the pain was all gone.

"Darling..." Tom whispered, turning his head to the wall where the glass shards were scattered against.

"He's such a fucking prick, Tom." You started to sob, making your eyes even more red.

"I fucking hate him. He threw away 8 months down the fucking drain." You pressed your face into your hands, feeling vulnerable. Whenever you're mad, you'd curse out every chance you get.

"Darling." Tom whispered again, walking to your side and pulling you to his chest. You didn't return the hug back, but cried into his arm in front of you.

"I hate him, Tom. He..he.." Sobs interrupted your sentence.

"Shh." Tom cooed, petting down your hair and rubbing your shoulder. He held you to him until your sobs became quiet and your movements were very still.

"I'm sorry you had to see me like this." You mumbled, still pressed into Tom. His hand went up and down your shoulder, indicating that he heard you.

"I don't usually drink when I'm angry, but it really hurts. It still hurts. I just wanted the pain to go away." Your eyebrows knit together as you felt your heart shatter even more than before.

Tom's arms around you tightened as you felt his breath against your ear.

"You deserve better. That son of a bitch doesn't deserve anyone as amazing as you." Tom whispered in your ear. A small smile tugged at the corner of your lip.

"You deserve someone where trust is between you two... where there's no suspicion of the other. You deserve someone who loves you inside and out, someone who would take a bullet for you." Tom continued, his voice very serious, but not stern. It was more loving and caring.

Pulling your head away from his chest, you looked up at his eyes that were staring down at you.

With your slightly more sober state, you tried to search for something in him.

Maybe you thought you saw a sparkle in his eyes and the love a lover would show. Maybe you saw Tom being with you, holding you like how he is right now, but for a longer time.

Maybe, just maybe...

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i feel like the ending was a little rushed. also this was suppose to be sad, but then this turned into a type of soft/sad imagine. also sorry for the serious curse words.. i use them to put emphasis in my writing so i hope it's not a bother :)

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