Aditya's toes wiggled inside his formal shoes. Shekhar, of all times took pleasure in depth reading the file when he forwarded it to get the final approval with signatures.

"I heard you have a meeting. Aren't you running late?" Shekhar grabbed a pen from the desk not catching an eye with his son. Rather, he focused on the papers.

"Less than an hour and thirty." He really needed to hurry, Aditya glanced at his wrist watch and back to his father who now looked up to him,

"I can leave. Only if you are done with that file approval." That instant, the screech sound of the pen followed, "You could have got it last night."

Yesterday had been hectic. Aditya hardly batted an eye throughout the day, forget about lunch. Then after a long shift he returned only to know Pavithra got the flu.
Madam wouldn't tell him.

So the entire day turned chaotic that the file consent matter easily slipped off his mind. Only a while ago Aditya recollected the missed detail and he rushed here.

"Should I take it as your ignorance or your carelessness?" The silence spoke for Aditya and Shekhar knew what it meant. He extended the file to him.

"It won't happen again." Aditya stood up to leave once he got hands over the file. Mistake was his and he shall make sure to not repeat it again.

"When you strive to attain your own happiness, you forget what's in your hands. Small things will become big one day. What will you do then?" Shekhar asked.

Aditya shut off his lashes for a moment of annoyance. He had no time to entertain his father- not now. Definitely not where this topic will lead them to.

"It was one time father. And it will be once and the last. Now, with your permission." He turned his heel to leave.

"Focus on business. I wouldn't have a say for the rest of your matters." Shekhar clasped his empty fingers and leaned on the chair.

"Rest of my matters?" He turned. There was a distance, for Aditya almost reached the door. But stopped only on those words.

"Anything that does not include professionalism." Shekhar looked away, "I will not interfere in your personal life."

"You wouldn't care for my personal choices as long as I run the business well?" Aditya reframed the same dialogue for a proper understanding.

But when Shekhar said yes, words vanished away. Aditya should have been happy. His father would not be a hindrance to any of his private choices.

But he wasn't happy. He disliked or even many times, hated the methods Shekhar implied on him. Yet, there was not a single day he ever made him feel like an outsider.

Shekhar barged about Aditya being his son. Definitely not on his face but to others and they always reached him.

"So-- I am your person who manages business and nothing else?" A son for namesake?- Aditya pushed down the surge of emotions in his throat. Shekhar agreed in a trance.

"You refuse to give your opinions, give away that right of being my father and all that matters is my performance in my professional life?"

Pain laced over his words, enough to bring Shekhar back to see his ached features, "No, Adi--" but he held a hand out and refused to look his way, "Don't."

"Make sure you abide by your saying then." Aditya spoke instead. Voice distant and one glance- Shekhar could see his slightly reddened eyes.

Reins of his father's around his neck can no longer control him. Suffocate him. It was gone and the freedom he wanted was bestowed to him.

Aditya strode away. The distance widened between them-- despite the calls of Shekhar behind, that does not stop him.

Afterall, new bruises and raw hurt spoke louder to him. People were wrong when they thought freedom came with relief of joy.

Aditya forced a smile because the freedom he got tasted bitter sweet.

~

"This photo--" Asha pointed her finger at a particular picture from the album, "You were four and a half. Your dada had a busy day with calls but he kept you with him. At such time, you snatched his landline."

Sanskaar glanced at the photo - His grandfather stood tall and a small version of himself in the elder's arms. Landline bigger than his face pressed mistakenly on the ears and a toothless grin posed to his amused grandfather.

"Then?" He enquired further, "Was he angry at me?" Sanskaar's head fell into her lap and Asha stroked his hair with a never ending smile.

"He had a stressful situation. Something about tax and shipping. After so long, your silly act gave a break to all of them." Asha chuckled, "I tease your dada a lot with it."

"He disliked how the topic steered from a serious matter to adoring your babytalks." Asha laughed as she fondly remembered the past while Sanskaar stared at her.

"You were so small back then" She resumed, her gaze now landed on her grandson, "Look at you now. Being enough to carry me."

"Babies don't stay the same. They grow enough to take care of those loving arms that once grew them." Sanskaar held her working hand and pressed a soft kiss.

"Even if you age older as an oldie, to a mother's eyes you'd forever remain their kid only." Asha caressed his face and closed the album with a heavy heart.

He noticed. Like every other time, a hint of sorrow was visible as Asha closed the album, "You should really stop looking at the photos if that makes you sad dadi."

"Photos are a frozen form of memory. Of the past you once lived, loved and cherished. And these--" Asha traced the edges of the closed album,

"He is here, stilled into these frames even if he's long gone." She smiled. Her warm fingertips over the rough cold surface of the album. Another hand, in his head.

Sanskaar retreated from her lap. An astonished look etched all over his face, "How do you smile?" He enquired with curiosity, "Despite these pictures make you yearn for him, how could you do it?"

"There's not a single second I have not longed for him." She clarified as she took the hand of her grandson,

"One accident caused his life. One call turned our life into shambles. But we survived, we live and do you think he'll be happy if we mourn him for the rest of our lives?"

The answer was obvious. Sanskaar shook his head at denial and Asha continued,

"That doesn't make our love any weaker for him Sunny. Instead, that love anchors as strength for us to cherish, laugh and enjoy a life including him- even as a thought, even as a memory."

"At times love loses anchor in the battle against the cruel fate. You are forced to step back because love alone is never enough to walk beside them." Sanskaar mused.

"You forsaken yourself along, child. That is called exile--" Asha was quick to sense that
something about him was so very wrong.

He detached himself from her hold and stood up. Sanskaar refused to hear  anything further, "I'll be out in ten minutes. Stay safe."

He was gone. Probably freshening up for his usual cafe part time. But oddly, it scared her because he looked so determined when he spoke.

All Asha could only do was to pray for Sanskaar to not do anything wrong.

~

Almost a week.

Exactly five and almost a quarter day he got back to her. On his own. She never expected no communication between them for days. But again, she promised to wait and it was worth it. 

Late but he reached out in the text earlier to meet. Now Swara was there, as she sipped her chai and often looked at Sanskaar who seemed busy attending to a customer.

They had not shared a word yet. Just a 'hi' and her usual order was there on the table in five minutes- chai. Swara tore her gaze from him to the sky outside.

Lights cracked between the dark sky. Soft rumbles of thunder marked the approaching heavy shower that night. Rain in Summer nights always makes everything cold.

It would take a dawn. A sunlight to warm all those cold things the rain once wiped off the warmth, "Hey!" The voice broke off her musings.

Sanskaar was seated before her. The apron neatly settled at the chair's arm, "I didn't expect a houseful today. You waited for so long, didn't you?" He leaned behind.

"The wait didn't trouble me at all." Swara smiled as she placed the cup on the table, "We have a lot to catch up on and there's news too! You called me at the right time." She exclaimed.

Her excitement lifted up his lips too. It's been a while since he actually smiled, genuinely, "You first then."

"First is yours. You called me here Sanskaar." Swara's tone softened, "Or we can do this tomorrow too if not now. You need rest." The trace of dark shade under his eyes and weary features didn't go unnoticed by her.

Sanskaar gazed down on the table to his fisted hands. He couldn't bear to look up but then, it was he who called her.

"Sanskaar?" She called out. A hand of hers gently moved towards his and suddenly, he moved back. The action itself made her heart drop down to an endless pit.

"I think it's high time we stop it." He swallowed thickly, much aware of the hurting eyes that stared at him.

"Stop what?" There were alarms. Blaring ones in her mind, asking her to walk out. Because somewhere the conversation didn't seem right nor did he look normal.

"This-- Us." He heard a soft gasp from her. Heard but didn't see. Sanskaar couldn't muster enough courage to look eye-to-eye. Not after what he just did.

"This-- No, I don't get you, Sanskaar." Swara chanted prayers. There's no way he could ever mean negative ways, can he? She shook her head in denial and hoped for answers. From him.

He could detect confusion and hope in her voice. Sanskaar's fisted hands had gone pale from the force he applied, "Let's part ways."

Swara caught her breath. Eyes wide, stilled at him who glanced anywhere except her. There's not a single time she imagined them this way, breaking up was out of reach.

A call from the cafe staff, Sanskaar had to rush back leaving her behind. Unwillingly. And she was there, her world paused while everyone worked just fine around her.

All that she now had was an empty chair, once occupied. But how could she empty that place, his place in her heart? She didn't know.

"Sanskaar move." A senior staff member took over the billing because it was the third time he made a mistake, yet again from the past twenty minutes.

"Where's your focus today? You--" Every other word was a blur to his ears. Sanskaar was least bothered for being scolded for his focus laid upon the staircase.

Swara hadn't come down. It was past twenty minutes and he left her with a dazed expression, snatching off all the excitement from the earlier. That haunted him.

"Sanskaar?" He jerked a bit when he was touched, "You should leave." Sanskaar blinked in confusion, "Your shift is over boy. Go now."

He collected his belongings and came out or rather, the guilt couldn't let him face her again. Sanskaar stepped out. Thunder rumbled and cracked the dark sky, letting it weep in drizzles.

A weary sigh left from him. He felt like a coward, running away from her but how could run away from his own heart that belonged to her now?

He turned to a side and there she was. Under the shade of the cafe outside. Should have waited for him. Sanskaar could neither speak nor cover the distance between them.

Sanskaar came- She was painfully aware even though her eyes were settled over the fallen sky, "Why?" Swara began, "We were just doing fine."

Swara had beautiful eyes. Those soft hazels would melt into gold and brown in the sun. Now that she looked at him, they were red. Hurting and breaking.

"What went wrong? How could you leave us?" Leave me? - The more she articulated, the more moist her eyes became. It burnt with seconds that went unanswered by him.

"Or is it? Am I being a burden to you as well--" Sanskaar's head snapped up at that, "You aren't! You've never been nor can you be one to anyone."

"Then why?" She choked her tears. Hoping for her silent pleas to reach him, bring him back to sense. Instead, all he gave her was silence. That damned silence.

"Of all people, you knew how my questions were never answered by my own family. Must you do the same?" Sanskaar momentarily pressed his eye lashes down.

There was pain and pleading in her wet eyes-- the pain he bestowed on her and the pleading he could never yield on, "Swara--" Sanskaar held her arms.

"Can't you see? I'm hurting you. I-- I am drowning you in an agony that you never deserved." Sanskaar's own eyes burn, "This cannot go on, Swara."

"What hurts me is your silence, Sanskaar." Tears slipped down her cheeks, "You don't look like yourself these days. You are so distant, so much far from reach and I'm afraid that I can't reach you." So don't go.

Swara's grasp over his hand tightened. Because it scared her-- to be broken again, to be alone again, mostly- to be without him and she didn't know what to do.

She weeped along with the drizzles that now became a heavy rain. Sanskaar swallowed thickly, "Look what I do to you. Look what I made you into."

His thumb reached to wipe off her tears, "Someone has to leave first." Sanskaar mused softly, "Before it stains all our good memories. Before it becomes bothersome."

"You really want us to end?" Thunder struck across the sky. Rain had started to take a faster pace. And Swara waited for an answer-- an answer she knew but wanted to hear.

Sanskaar took a moment to savour her warm hands clasped with his. For one last time. Surprisingly, it was he who was cold today, not her.

"I'm sorry." He stepped back. Their hand no more together as he stared at the ground, not her, "This-- has to stop." He forced himself to breathe.

Swara had to step back because Sanskaar had gone too far. Too stubborn to not return back. The sickly heavy clouds drenched her in a minute, "So be it."

Sanskaar looked up, only to see her drenched. He took a step forward in concern and she stepped back, "As you wish, It ends here."

Swara was glad it rained. After all, tears and rain could be differentiated. It would only be her company in her walk back to her residence.

One last glance at him and she walked away. Alone.

Sanskaar stood there for a long time despite how long before she had faded away from his sight.

It should be okay. Swara-- she lived without him before. There were people for her. She had a whole dream career in making. That should be enough for a good distraction.

And him? Everything that made him happy was neither lost or gone out of his hands. By his own choice. If anything that remained were its memories.

Destroyed and incomplete were their ends. Ends he never wanted. Ends he never dreamt of. Sanskaar's eyes brimmed and his throat pained.

Though his mind approved, his heart had been aching. It couldn't bear the loss of losing everything that made him happy. Everything that he loved.

Sanskaar could never seek solace from anyone because at home, there was an old lady who required his strength to fight. Not his suffering to break her further.

Nothing would be right. Nothing would be the same. And he could only watch all of it drown and drown along.

Rain drenched the entire town and so did his tears drenched him. Both cried, the loudest after a long time.

~

Swara had a vague recollection of walking back to her mansion. Drenched to the bones. It was cold but never enough to withstand the burns of her heart.

The clean carpets on the threshold became wet, left traces of water droplets and damp footprints. She least cared about the mess for her life itself had become a very one.

Distant to her ears, there was a loop of his words that rang. Words he confessed to her, words that still didn't make sense to her. But it was all over.

The study of her father's still glowed the dim gold lights. Swara made plans to visit him after her meeting with Sanskaar. After letting him know what she planned.

She dreamt of having the biggest smile when she returned from him. But there she was- pieces of her heart strewn all around and she had no strength to collect them.

Anyways, Swara strode to the study. One knock and she heard Shekhar calling her in. For some reason the dull throb inside her intensified.

Yet she walked in.

"Can you accompany me for the Visa processing?" Shekhar averted his eyes from the files and the sight that greeted him was not welcoming.

"You are taking up Julliard's offer?" Swara was too distracted to catch the surprise from his tone.

He had asked her a couple of times about it. Each time, she presented her confused state and also her kind of disapproval to move away.

Swara gave a nod for her throat had become constrained. The lump wouldn't let her talk nor let the pain be pushed.

"We'll go tomorrow." Shekhar could have continued. Asking her to change clothes but Swara already walked away. It was too clear- she seemed lost.

Swara barely made steps forward to her room. Barely the voice of Reema from behind stopped her. The weight of despair in her heart was too heavy, too blinding.

"You should have waited for the rain to pause. Look--" Reema paused the moment she noticed her face.

One could have concluded that Swara had the after effects of being drenched-  Reddened face, slight shivers and often sniffs. But that didn't fool her.

Reema's warm hands reached out on her wet arms. Swara bit her cheeks to hold back the sob. To swallow off the pain from being spilled.

"Did anything happen?" Swara looked up with blood shot eyes that shocked Reema. She utterly failed at her attempts to keep her emotions at bay,

"Everything's over. I-- I couldn't fight--I---" The sob broke free and her frame wrecked with it. Tears trailed over her moist skin yet again.

"You don't need to fight for everything, child. If it is meant be yours, the world itself would conspire you to get it back. It is okay." Reema spoke softly but nothing seemed to get into her.

So instead she gathered Swara into her embrace. And it only made her weep more and more-- for things that slipped off her hands, no matter how much she wanted to hold on to.

A/N: Life has turned out hectic.. definitely when I had to shift cities for my masters. It was a painful process but yeah, I am not going to dead pan this book.

We'll survive this✨