Disclaimers:

The PJO and HoO characters belong to Rick Riordan, as does the series.

The Land of Stories belongs to Chris Colfer.

All HP-related things (such as Dementors and Azkaban) belong to J.K. Rowling, as do her books.

Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer (who can keep it).

Written by:

@AmAeRaI
@libraryhaunter
@Chilea
@The__Crazy_Girl
@-Nut_the_stars-
@BrokenTimeTurner

To the Land of Stories: A Story of the PJ Fandom, Cliché Fanfic Authors and Apparently Irrelevant Characters

libraryhaunter was the first one inside. As the fangirls walked in, they found themselves being sucked into the void, turned upside down and shaken. Clinging to their books and electronics, they toppled out onto a patch of grass. There they found a surprising sight: Frank chilling by the trees, where he was chatting with animals while practicing archery with High Queen Susan the Gentle and Goldilocks.

"So we don't need to battle?" that_awesome_cahill asked, slightly disappointed, as she lowered her celestial bronze dagger.

"It's probably a trap," Sparr0w1234 warned, tightening her hold on her hardcover.

"I am not taking any chances," BrokenTimeTurner agreed, still clutching her blue plastic hairbrush, which was inspired by Rachel's own who was not a jealous (*insert cuss word here*) but an awesome artistic Oracle.

High Queen Susan was the first to spot the fangirls. She immediately dropped her bow and ran in the other direction. Goldilocks saw what she did and took out her fearsome porridge ladle. Frank, turning around, noticed the fangirls in his company last.

"Who are you, and what do you want?" Goldilocks called out, brandishing her ladle.

"Nothing to do with you," Chilea told her. "Now, why don't you run along and break into some more bears' cottages?"

Goldlilocks stared at her, and she realised that wouldn't work. Changing tactics, Chilea pointed into the distance.

"I've got superhero enhanced vision, and, because I'm such a nice, friendly person, I'll tell you that the poor, nice, fuzzy bears are chasing you for stealing their porridge and breaking their chairs and all the other stuff you did to them. They're gaining in on you, too," she added.

At that, Goldilocks heroically trembled, dropped her ladle, raced off, came back, picked it up and raced off again.

"Get away from me, crazy people!" Frank shouted, in response to libraryhaunter reaching out to kidnap him (for his own good, noted, but the poor boy couldn't have known that right then).

"Hey, we may be crazy, but we are here to rescue you," libraryhaunter reassured him.

Frank looked suspiciously at her. "I don't trust you."

"We'll take you back to Hazel," she promised, knowing that Frazel and its faithful shippers were on the line.

At that Frank agreed, albeit somewhat reluctantly. "Okay. But, do you even have a way to get us out of here?"

libraryhaunter frowned. "What do you mean?"

"It's gone," a fangirl noted, her sonic screwdriver turning on and off from her nervous twitching.

"What's gone?" another fangirl asked.

"The door!" somebody cried out.

Then all Hades broke loose. All the fangirls were shouting, some in panic, others in confusion, and many in confuzzlement.

Then the fangirls got cut off by cliché dramatic music starting to play really loudly, and evil villainous laughter echoing in the background which was meant to sound scary, but just sounded ridiculous and annoying. Cliché stuff tends to do that.

"The cliché authors have joined forces!" Frank realized. "They won't let anyone they put in here out! And because you're helping us, they won't let you get out either."

"Dam," spat The_Crazy_Girl. Many fangirls snickered at that in spite of the situation.

"We will find a way out," Sparr0w1234 assured her fellow fangirls.

"I have the Doctor's phone number!" BrokenTimeTurner said quickly, getting out her phone. Other fangirls stared jealousy, and then immediately starting demanding it.

"Eh, guys! Guys! Focus," The__Crazy-Girl cut in, being one of the few who wasn't in that fandom. The fangirls fell silent, at last, their pockets now with phones that held the most precious number of all for them. "So can you use the phone number?" She asked BrokenTimeTurner

"Uh....no," BrokenTimeTurner admitted. "I assume this is some kind of pocket universe. The Tardis probably won't be able to come here but for a few seconds. I'm sorry, guys, but we're pretty much stuck here."

"Frank, any ideas?" A fangirl asked, remembering that Frank was a tactician and not just a shapeshifter.

"Well, there's only one person who can help us. We've got to get Grover. He can play a spell on his reed pipes and make the cliché authors fall asleep, so we can go through the Void again."

"Can he kill them instead?" AmAeRaI asked, hopefully, her wand prepared to perform an Avada Kedavra spell. She hated the cliché writers and Mary Sues with a boiling hot fury.

Frank gave her an odd look. "No."

She frowned. "Why?"

"Wait, why didn't Grover do that before?" libraryhaunter asked

"Because," Frank said, "the area was crowded with OOCness. Hopefully your thoughts and knowledge of canon can help him. Also, he doesn't have any reed pipes."

"I still think we should kill them," AmAeRaI mumbled under her breath. She earned another odd look from Frank, who heard.

"Wait."

All the fangirls looked at the fangirl who said that.

"What will we do when we get to them? When they wake up, I mean?" Sparr0w1234 asked.

There was a moment of silence before AmAeRaI yelled in answer, her enragement visible, "WE PUT THEM IN AZKABAN SURROUNDED BY DEMENTORS, AND THEN IN A BLACK HOLE TO DIE!"

There were shouts and cheers of agreement all around before Chilea cried out with her fist high in the air, "PINOCCHIO PRISON!"

"There?!"

Chilea nodded, as did many other fangirls. They all raised their weapons: canon cannon, reality blast, OOC shields, the cliche-drop-dead bazooka, and Mary Sue barbie play set used to imprison Mary Sues and be made into plastic dolls (Soon to be available in Azkaban to further torture the prisoners.), and normal weapons from fangirls' canon books.

Before they could work on the Azkaban Mashup of Pinocchio Prison surrounded by Dementors, demons and Grievers on the infinite verge of a black hole, they had to find Grover and the other irrelevant (in the cliché writers' opinion) characters so they could get them back into the real world safely.

"So how are you going to find Grover?" Frank asked.

"Well, do you know where he is?"

"No." Frank looked down. "But maybe there's a way we can track him down. Anything can happen in The Land of Stories."

"I think I may be able to do the thing with the nuts. You know, where you put them on the ground and they represent your location," Sparr0w1234 suggested.

"Great!" libraryhaunter said cheerfully. "I think I can also convince my dad to get us some reed pipes. He's the god of music after all."

libraryhaunter closed her eyes and prayed to Apollo. The fangirls watched eagerly as she finally said out loud, "Fine. I'll listen to y-you re-recite"-she took a deep breath-"recite your poetry if you can give us some reed pipes."