Valerio Shihab was firm in certain beliefs: art was, sadly, an underappreciated, undervalued profession to choose for a sought after career path; cold and cloudy days were superior to warm and sunny ones; tea, no matter what flavor, wasn't perfect unless it was paired with sweet creamer; and love, at least in his case when it came to romance, wasn't real.

Heartbreak, previously a passing stranger, was now an intimate partner whose desperate claws embedded themselves into his person. Sleepless nights, pangs of sadness, and disappointment which came in waves at random intervals weren't situations he was prepared to go through on a regular basis. A strange sense of relief accompanying those feelings was confusing to experience as well.

The culprit?

Only one person was responsible for so much negativity, alongside a new, festering sense of self-doubt: Valerio's now ex-girlfriend, Julianna.

In hindsight, Valerio wished he would have talked himself out of taking time off from school to be with her. Traveling with someone who didn't even want to save their relationship was mentally taxing. While seeing new places was a wonderful experience, fond memories were sullied by the fact that he was knowingly putting off the inevitable.

Cutting himself loose of Julianna's hold was something Valerio needed. Still, he couldn't lie by saying the ordeal in its entirety—both the relationship and the breakup—didn't cause him immense pain.

Because it did.

Although he'd been single for a few months now, the damaging effects of staying with such an incompatible partner were still being felt. They robbed him of a healthy sense of security, trust, and willingness to put himself out there again when it came to having anyone in his social circle.

That's why, while smoothing out the fabric of a thin collared sweatshirt, Valerio didn't experience the slightest hint of excitement when it came to being back at school.

If anything, he was nervous. A tad out of place too.

First days at school, no matter if you were in elementary or university, always started the same. A teacher half-hungover, still coming down from the effects of a long summer break, greeted their students with fluctuating levels of enthusiasm. They would go over a lengthy syllabus, discuss what books would be needed for the course, and talk about what was expected out of their students in terms of intellectual capabilities. Then, gears would be switched to an awkward, rather unnecessary round of "introduce yourselves by giving your name and a random fact about you which no one is going to remember in the next five minutes".

How fun.

In both previous years of attending college, Valerio's first couple of days saw him crammed into a group of students by his professor in hopes that everyone would make friends. Putting himself out of his comfort zone was still nerve wracking, yes; but the prospect of actually doing it hadn't filled him with dread the way it was now.

Valerio wasn't planning on making friends, finding a romantic partner, or seeking anyone out for a weekend of fun or the occasional one night stand.

For the foreseeable future, his life was going to consist of sketch pads, charcoal pencils, and long hours spent working over a drafting desk.

Focusing on his studies would (hopefully) make it easier to ignore any lingering emotional pain caused by his breakup. If things happened the way he wanted them to, bouts of inner turmoil would compress and bury themselves until nothing was left in their wake.

What came after was up in the air.

Right now, Valerio's sole concern was getting to the dining hall for a late breakfast before his first class.

He grabbed a tote bag made of durable polyester sitting on top of a mound of unfolded blankets. Wrinkled sheets were kicked out of the way, rubbing against a soft shag rug. A familiar worn shawl hanging on the back of a nearby wheelie chair was draped over one shoulder.

Its frayed ends caressed his thigh, giving him a gentle reminder to bundle up properly.

A new pair of breathable trail-running shoes were all the way across the room by the entrance. Frigid temperatures clinging to the surface of linoleum tiling past through the fabric of thin socks, receiving a short wince upon taking the first step away from fluffy carpet. Quiet pitter-patters accompanied each footfall until reaching a tall wooden door.

Sneakers were put on, keys were attached to an aquatic themed lanyard, a folded leather wallet was pocketed, and a quick glance was taken at the realistic painting hanging above the light switch.

Valerio brought his fingers to his lips before resting them against the picture.

"Wish me luck, mamá. Love you."

His gaze followed along the intricate detailing of a piano colored with a deep chestnut brown, quite similar to the shade of his eyes. A certain signature blended in with wooden patterning. In spite of the name being so hidden, its presence brought about a feeling of ease—as if the person was present to give a heartfelt sendoff in preparation for a long, daunting day.

Valerio was grateful for it.

Overhead lights were turned off, and the door automatically locked behind him.

He was still in the process of fixing his shawl by the time he made it outside.

Light sounds of foot traffic against cobblestone pathways were muffled beneath hyperactive conversations happening in the nearby vicinity. Bristle door sweeps kept heavy slabs of metal from scraping against concrete when being pushed outward. Swaying of thick cloth bellowed high above, decorative flags housing a black base, silver border, and the school's acronym printed in red lettering.

Alongside freshly cut grass and a lingering scent of petrichor, the bitter aroma of coffee wafted outward from a nearby shop. Sweet pastries joined the cluster of pleasant fragrances as well.

Since a new year was upon them, members of the university's marching band were seen practicing a fresh set of drills on the football field. Instruments of varying sizes were sitting in a large group on top of vibrant turf. Hands were occupied by thick, stapled together packets. Mouths moved silently as people counted to themselves while marching toward specified destinations.

Further in the back, members of the color guard were busy practicing their flag twirls. A seasoned instructor watched everyone while belting out numbers at a certain tempo. Elements of jazz dance were incorporated into a fast routine, shedding light on what the show's overall theme was about.

Valerio allowed himself a few more seconds to observe his old teachers and classmates. A deep emptiness settled in his chest, however, the longer he watched from afar.

To spare himself more grief, in resignation, he turned away.

Maybe next year.

The dining hall was still the same as ever: all glass exterior; international flags perched atop metal poles; fields of grass on either side of a stone pathway full of other students sitting on blankets, munching on various to-go items.

Inside, central air conditioning caused a frosty wall of air to greet Valerio. He walked along navy-colored carpeting to get to a line of registers where faculty members were waiting. His school ID was scanned, allowing him entry into the decently inhabited cafeteria.

There wasn't an attempt made to approach the hot food line serving waffles, pancakes, scrambled eggs, oatmeal, etc. Instead, the kiosk for cold food had more appeal with varieties of fresh fruit, yogurt, smoothies, bottled milkshakes, sweets, and sandwiches on display for anyone to take.

Chestnut brown eyes glanced through a wide selection of packaged fruit salads. A container with strawberries, green grapes, and blueberries was pulled off of the rack. A banana was also taken, along with a portion of smooth strawberry yogurt. For a bit of an extra treat, salted almonds were added to Valerio's light meal.

His backpack was placed down onto the chair opposite of his at a two-seater table. Miscellaneous food items joined each other on the plastic surface to be savored one by one.

Beginning to consume a feast for one, faint vibrations could be felt against Valerio's leg. He took his phone out of his pocket with a small grin, knowing good and well who took the time out of their early afternoon to message him.

Pops:

You settling in okay LeLe?

LeLe:

ill be alright

just tired

had a rough night

Pops:

You know you can call your mother and I whenever you want right?

LeLe:

i know dad

but im a big boy

gotta do things on my own sometimes 👍

Pops:

We just get a little worried.

We still think you went back to school too soon.

LeLe:

there wasnt  a point in me holding it off anymore

i put my life on hold enough for *her*

i want to feel like i have some of me back

Pops:

Just make sure you're taking care of yourself okay?

And our door is always open whenever you decide to come back home.

LeLe:

thanks dad

ill make sure to call mama later

Pops:

👍❤️

LeLe:

❤️

Valerio was overcome with relief at his short yet sweet conversation.

One of the most astounding customs Loving Papa Shihab had was to never pry too much. He hovered like any other worried parent would, but he knew when to stick around and when to give the necessary space. Prodding at an issue wasn't a common occurrence unless it was something serious.

Although Valerio returning to college after breaking up with his long-term girlfriend was serious, he needed time to sort everything out on his own.

It was nice to know, anyway, that his parents were available if the path he was trudging along became too bumpy.

If he ever stumbled or fell, they'd be there to pick him up every single time.

Humming to himself, Valerio took a second to look through his schedule again for the current semester since his phone was out.

He was excited to get into 2D Design, 3D Design, Still Life Drawing, and Drawing Anatomy 3 in the coming hours and days. They were courses he was finally able to take since his general education criteria had been fulfilled at the end of his second year. Now, aside from an occasional elective for additional credits, Valerio was taking classes specified for his concentration in Sketching and Drawing under the Fine Arts program. Taking those courses was one leap in his life he was more than ready to take.

Speaking of electives, however, the last course which wasn't a welcomed sight on his schedule was the only available class left for the semester: Introduction to Ballet.

Having a long history with music made him gifted when it came to his ability in keeping time. Switching between styles or rhythms wasn't difficult. Performing in front of crowds lost the strength to make him anxious a long time ago.

But those rules applied when it came to working in a band.

Valerio had two left feet if anyone ever managed to pull him onto the dance floor.

Unfortunately, it was either accept Intro to Ballet or struggle through an extra elective on top of his requirements for next semester.

Yeah, no thanks.

The class would only be taken twice a week for fifteen weeks. Valerio wouldn't be bested by an elective which didn't even span six months—he'd survive.

Maybe.

Hopefully.

Eating breakfast acted as a decent distraction to ignore tight knots forming in his stomach. At least, blissful solitude remained until loud voices burst into the cafeteria.

Large groups of students fresh out of class made their way inside. Faces adorned bright grins. Hugs and handshakes were shared. Some people congregated to the food lines, while others sat down at tables to claim a spot for their friends.

The sight made Valerio hold back his urge to curl into a ball.

Being with friends who legitimately found themselves to be delighted by his presence—it was an intriguing idea he'd never been able to go through himself.

In a way, underneath slight jealousy, there was pity for the ocean of faces occupying tables around the room.

Groups like theirs were anything but genuine.

Usually, people had smaller, more intimate circles inside of their single, larger, fabricated friends-turned-family clique. Hanging around each other didn't necessarily mean everyone liked those they had to occupy a shared space with. Sometimes, "friend" was more of a glorified title given to a frequent classmate seen on multiple days in shared classes.

Companionships never lasted once the semester was over. There was a chance everyone who was sitting together right now wouldn't even interact after returning from winter or summer break.

The nature of most students was to create a social circle for the benefit of taking from those within it. Whether it be to form connections for a possible future career, gain insight on ways to better themselves, or to use others for the sake of passing a class, it wasn't common for people to form relationships for the sole purpose of just having a companion.

Authentic friendships weren't something Valerio ever received, even though all he ever did for those he cared about was give, give, give.

But...it wasn't the time to get into that.

He got out of his chair and collected his belongings with a huff. Plastic wrappers were tossed into the recycling bin by the exit. Strong hands clasped the strap of his tote bag with an iron grip until making it out into the open world. A place where frantic voices and feigned exhilaration didn't give him an annoying headache.

An expected hush, thankfully, made itself at home in the walls of the Performing Arts building. Surrounding, occupied classrooms and practice rooms kept any sounds of life within their confines, courtesy of impressive sound proofing. Students moving throughout the halls were careful to not disturb those around them.

The instructor for the symphonic band walked down the corridor with a binder full of sheet music in hand. She glanced up to make sure no one was in front of her and, in doing so, made brief eye contact with Valerio.

They shared a warm, lighthearted wave in passing.

The instructor was someone who was safe—familiar.

Walking into the dance room eradicated that feeling as soon as it came.

Young people occupied random areas to prepare themselves for class. Leotards, tights, leggings, and tank-tops outlined defined figures posing in various ways. Anyone with long hair kept flowing locks out of their faces by using high ponytails, fishtail braids, or buns as choices of style. Outside shoes were traded in for ballet slippers, muffling the sounds of people stretching while on the move.

Valerio set down his belongings near a free chair at the edge of a bigger bundle. His outer layer of clothing was removed, revealing his own formfitting attire. He sat down to make it easier to switch shoes. He also did so to not make a scene by accidentally falling flat on his face when trying to balance on one foot to change out both sneakers.

His blatant anxiety was one sided, though.

It seemed the other students in his class were more occupied with getting themselves together than they were observing any newcomers.

Good.

Maybe the rest of the semester would stay that way-

"Hey, I'm sorry to bother you. Do you mind if I sit here? This is the last free seat available."

Still hunched down, Valerio allowed his eyes to roll back before closing.

He just had to go jinx everything.

"Yeah, go right ahead."

"Thanks..."

The stranger's silence was a clear indicator of an unspoken request for his classmate's name.

Understanding it was better to present who he was for the sake of not making the situation awkward, Valerio sat up...

...And he felt uncontrollable heat rush to his face.

The stranger had a stunning shade of royal blue mixed into the natural black of a hybrid hairstyle. Shorter strands which didn't reach a messy bun fell past his ears and forehead, radiant blue accentuating his freckled, gingerbread-colored complexion. Green eyes appeared more saturated in contrast with his darker skin tone, adding to an already captivating, natural face. Faint acne scars didn't take away from his beauty. Neither did a slight misalignment in his teeth when putting forth an uneven smile.

He didn't know if it was because of the stranger's appearance, or the fact that he hadn't had any interaction with someone outside of his family in a long time; but Valerio found himself twiddling with his thumbs.

"I'm...Valerio. Valerio Shihab."

"Theodore Raymond."

And there went the plan to remain unseen and unnoticed.