Zelda slumped against the door and wiped the tears off her face with the palms of her hands. She couldn't cry because Eden might hear her. Forcing herself to stand, she turned and locked the door. She had let Boone see too much. Now he wouldn't leave it alone until he knew it all. Part of her was relieved, but another part, the part she had been fighting for over six years, felt nothing but fear.

She checked on Eden one more time, brushing her hair out of her face. Eden's eyes opened, and she smiled. "I love you, Mommy," she murmured.

"I love you too, Eden," Zelda whispered placing a kiss on her forehead just before Eden rolled over and fell back asleep, smiling.

Quietly, Zelda moved towards the bathroom, closing the door and locking it before she started the shower, finally letting the tears fall. She looked at herself in the mirror, wondering what made her so inherently unlovable. Her mother had left her when she was about Eden's age, her father didn't want her until he had needed her, and Collin had never wanted her. She had been a means to an end for all of them. Zebadiah loved her, but not enough to express worry or concern for her even when they were kids.

Eden loved her, she knew that, but would she still love her when she discovered that she wasn't her birth mother? Eden was legally hers. She had adopted her before Collin had died. It was the one decent thing he had done in his life. Zelda knew what it felt like to not be wanted or loved, and she would move heaven and earth to make sure that Eden never felt a moment of that.

Zelda stripped and climbed into the shower, bowing her head and letting the warm water wash over her, wondering if Boone would still be interested if he found out that no man had ever wanted her enough to make love to her?

A virginal mother, no one would believe it.

Collin had had only had two passions in his life, loving Cara White and hating Boone Norris. He loved only one woman in his life, Cara White. He had been crazy about her even after she had left him. Collin had also been insanely jealous of Boone, to the point that he wanted to lash out at him and hurt him in any way he could. Collin had used Zelda to help with both passions.

After Cara had left school and moved away to parts unknown to everyone except Collin, Collin had turned his attention to Zelda. He knew that Zelda had a thing for Boone, and after the Christmas kiss Collin had insisted that Boone felt the same about her, but Zelda never really believed it.

Then Collin offered Zelda what she desperately wanted, an escape. He had insisted they run away together to L.A; he had an agent there because he had two books finished and they were talking about making one into a film, and Zelda had agreed. There was no other out for her if she had stayed in New Orleans. Her father had been insistent that she skip graduate school. He wanted her to marry and take up the social side of the family business, but it was about more that being out of her father's grasp. Zelda had also wanted to be as far away from Boone as possible. He was about to marry another woman, and she didn't think she could handle that.

Collin had been charming, saying all of the right things, kissing her passionately, and promising her they could make a life together. He had made her feel wanted and beautiful, something no one else had ever done. Now, at the ripe old age of thirty, she could see what an easy mark she had been.

Zelda had been honest with him and told him that she had never made love to a man, and he had thought it was wonderful, making Zelda feel special in the process, but then he had used that fact against her. Collin had insisted that he wanted to wait until they were married, keeping it to kisses and light make-out sessions. Then, after they were married, he insisted that her virginity was inspirational to him, and he couldn't touch her. It had upset Zelda, but she figured that it wouldn't last forever. In the end, it was his grand joke on Boone. He had told her one night in a drunken haze that he had never wanted her. He just didn't want Boone to have her, and keeping her a virgin was the ultimate joke. He also admitted to loving Cara and that he couldn't stand to touch another woman.

It was at that point that Zelda realized she wasn't even a person to him, only a tool to be used to get his way. It hurt, not because she loved him, even though Zelda had hoped one day she would, but because he was one more person who hadn't wanted her.

The fact that he had only been using her was once again proven when she found out that Cara was living in L.A. and that Collin had married her to make Cara jealous. Something that worked better than he had hoped. A married Collin was much more interesting than a single Collin.

Collin and Cara had started an affair, and Cara had gotten pregnant. They were in the process of running away together when their car crashed, killing Cara and causing her to deliver Eden a month earlier than she was due.

The tabloids had a field day with the news of Collin's affair and Cara's tragic death, saying that he was in the car with multiple women and that he was a playboy. They had wanted him to be another Hemingway, and they even compared his works to Hemingway. Thankfully, the news of the baby never broke.

Zelda had gone to see Collin in the hospital. He was barely hanging on to life, a shell of who he was, and all he could do was beg Zelda to take care of his daughter. He didn't want to see Eden, and he had no interest in naming her. He only wanted to know that she would have a home. He knew all of the buttons to push to make Zelda fall in line with his plans, telling her Eden would be unloved and only tolerated if she was adopted by someone else because neither he nor Cara had any family to take care of her.

Zelda believed it all and agreed to adopt Eden. Collin had recovered and been present for the adoption, but the very next day he had shot himself in the head. Knowing Collin the way that she did, she didn't doubt that it was to keep with the Hemingway theme.

At the time, they had been staying in a small town in the Midwest in an attempt to get away from the press, and no one in the small town cared about a silly author. The official statement from his agent was that he died from complications caused by the car accident, which in a way was true because he had killed himself to be with Cara.

The water in the shower turned from hot to cold bringing her back to the present, and Zelda reached up and turned it off, reaching for a towel. At least tomorrow was Saturday.

Zelda would do what she always did when her past caught up to her; she would focus on Eden. She would love the hell out of that little girl. They would do something fun and not worry about the past or future.

Zelda fell into bed with images of Boone on stage running through her mind. It was so much better than remembering the past.