CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

The rise

"ARE you sure you don't want me to come?" Bakas sa mukha ni Trev ang pag-aalala nang ihinto niya ang sasakyan niya sa tapat ng girls dormitory ng DGU.

I flashed him a reassuring smile. "You should go back. They must be waiting."

Bumuntonghininga siya at muli akong tiningnan para siguraduhin kung ayos lang ba talaga ako.

"Alright. But if something goes wrong, you have to call me," bilin niya sa 'kin at agad naman akong tumango.

Humalik ako sa pisngi niya bago ako tuluyang lumabas ng Wrangler niya.

Nakita ko na agad ang sasakyan ni Bell na nakaparada sa gilid kaya agad kong binuksan 'yong pinto sa may passenger seat at sumakay sa loob.

Naramdaman kong nakatitig siya sa 'kin pero hindi ako nag-abalang lumingon o tumingin sa kanya. Nanatiling diretso ang tingin ko sa labas.

"Thanks for comi—"

"I'll give you three minutes to talk, Bell. I'm in the middle of our team dinner when you called," I cut him off and glanced at him. I want to tell him that I'm really glad that he called, but I also want to keep the distance between us.

I don't know if I'm just seeing things, but I saw disappointment in his eyes. Why is he even disappointed? He should be glad I'm making our talk short. I'm doing him a favor.

It's been three months since the last time I saw him, but I could still feel my heart aching for him as I saw pain in his eyes.

"Gonz came to see me last night," panimula niya.

Natigilan ako nang marinig ko iyon. Bakit naman siya pupuntahan ni Gonz?

"He apologized, but I ended up ruining his face. About that, by the way, I didn't do that because I wanted to. He actually told me to punch him until it satisfies me so . . . I did. Madali akong kausap." He shrugged nonchalantly.

And that suddenly reminded me of the bruises I've seen on Gonz's face earlier. So that explains why he had those.

"And we're good after that," dagdag niya kaya lalo akong natigilan.

"Maybe that's the good thing about us, boys. Throwing out our anger through a punch to make things work between us."

Tipid akong napangiti nang sabihin niya 'yon. Totoo nga siguro. Gano'n din kasi ang napansin ko sa iba ko pang mga kaibigan na lalaki. Lalo na doon sa mga naging kaklase ko dati no'ng high school.

"You know what's even more funny?" he asked. Oh please, nothing's funny about anything right now.

"Sana gano'n na lang din sa 'ting dalawa. Isang labasan lang ng sama ng loob, okay na," sambit niya saka siya mahinang natawa.

"Crissia isn't the person you think she is."

Nang banggitin niya ang pangalang iyon ay muli akong napatingin sa kanya.

"She's just a friend." He paused. "A really great one."

Tumango ako. "Y-Yeah. Feem told me about her."

"I know you're aware of how hard things work as a medtech student. I didn't even had friends in our class. All my life, it's been always the volleyball team. I hang out with volleyball players. They're my friends, my family."

I didn't say anything. I just listened to him and he kept talking.

"It became even harder when you weren't around."

Mahina akong natawa.

So, this is about me now? Is he blaming me again for everything?

"I'm not blaming you, Keen."

Napatitig ako sa kanya.

I didn't know which made me happy. Hearing him say that he's not blaming me, or when he simply called me by my last name. I didn't hear him say that for so long. I just missed it so much that it made my eyes wet.

"You deserved a perfect summer that time. I didn't want to bother you when I've been struggling in acads because I know you were dealing with something heavier that time. That summer, I spent a lot of time with Crissia not because we wanted it. We were stuck with each other because of responsibilities. We're the top students in our batch so professors are expecting too much from us. We didn't want to disappoint them."

He flashed me a half smile and looked away. "When you saw her coming out from my room that night wearing my shirt, I let her wear it because a patient where we observed a simple stitching from our senior spilled blood and stained her clothes. So, I offered her a little help and let her wear my shirt instead."

"Can't she go home and wear her shirt instead? Why would she even dare walk around wearing your shirt? How did you expect me to react?" I said impatiently. That little misunderstanding messed us up.

"She can't go home that time. Her father who used to abuse her finally found where she lives. She's hiding from him for so many years that's why I had to let her spend a few hours in my dorm. But you judged me the moment you saw her because you knew what kind of guy I was in the past. And that just proved how lacking your trust was."

That caught me off guard.

I really messed things up, didn't I?

Parang baliw akong natawa kahit walang nakakatawa. Sadyang natatangahan ako sa sarili ko.

"Fine. I'm sorry!"

"That's the problem about you, Keen. You keep apologizing to me but you don't really mean it. You just think you do but you actually don't."

"Your three minutes is up," malamig kong sabi. Ayaw ko nang makipagtalo sa kanya. Wala ring mapupuntahan 'tong usap na 'to. Bakit nga ba ako pumayag na makipagkita sa kanya?

Akmang bubuksan ko na ang pinto sa tabi ko para lumabas ng sasakyan niya pero natigilan ako nang marahan niyang hawakan ang braso ko.

"I suck. Right?" he said.

I'm so confused. Why can't he just . . . let me go and get over me?

He let out a frustrated sigh and avoided my eyes.

Nanghina ako no'ng iwasan niya ang mata ko.

I tried reaching out to him but I halted when I saw tears coming out from his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I really am. I'm sorry for everything I've said. Including the time when I told you that I should have brought Gonz with me and that you could do that thing in front of me. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm sor—"

"Come here," I said as I wrapped my arms around him.

If only I could take away all his pain, I would.

"I love you, Bell." My voice cracked as I finally let my tears fall from my eyes. "But this is going to be the last time I'd see you. You have to let me go . . ."

***

"RARA! Rara! Rara!" the crowd chanted.

All I could hear was my name all over the arena.

And I can't stop myself from smiling whenever I see how hard they always try to support me.

"This is our last season, Ra. Let's win the championship game again, alright?" nakangiting sabi ni Feem saka niya ako marahang tinulak pabalik sa puwesto ko.

Hindi ko maiwasang kabahan ng kaunti dahil na rin sa dami ng nanonood sa 'min. We're live on tv and how am I supposed to calm myself? Each time I enter the arena, it always feels like a first time.

Gusto kong tawanan ang sarili ko dahil hindi pa rin ako sanay na nakikita ang sarili ko sa tv at sa internet.

It's been three years, Ra. Bakit ba hindi ka pa nasanay?

Nang paluin ko ang bola, sa 'min napunta ang huling puntos.

Sabay-sabay na nagtayuan ang mga nanonood at agad kaming nagtipon sa gitna ng mga ka-team ko. Sa sobrang saya namin ay niyakap namin nang mahigpit ang bawat isa saka nila ako binuhat ng sabay-sabay at paulit-ulit na itinaas sa ere.

Masaya ako dahil nanalo kami, pero hindi ko rin maiwasang malungkot dahil ito na ang huling beses na lalaro ako para sa De Grande University.

Mabilis nga talaga 'yong panahon 'no. Parang kailan lang, kakalipat ko lang dito sa De Grande. Tapos next week, graduation ko na.

Nakipagkamay kami sa Silvred University saka kami nag-group picture sa gitna. Marami rin ang sumulpot na reporter para interview-in kami isa-isa. Hinayaan ko lang din na magpa-picture sa 'kin 'yong mga taong walang sawang sumuporta sa 'kin.

Halos inabot din ng kalahating oras bago naubos 'yong mga nakapila para magpa-picture sa 'kin, sa 'min.

No'ng maubos ang mga tao sa arena ay naglakad na ako pabalik sa bleachers at sinalubong agad ako ng yakap ni Gonz.

He even lifted me up to show how happy he is for me.

"Congrats," sabay naming sabi sa isa't isa kaya pareho kaming natawa.

They also won the championship game yesterday. He was too busy after the game that's why I didn't expect him to come and watch my game. Alam kong pagod siya mula kahapon pa.

Inilapit ko ang bibig ko sa tenga niya saka ako bumulong sa kanya. "Thanks for watching our game, Gonz."

He flashed me a wide smile and gave me a soft kiss on my cheek. "Love you, Ra."

____

Tiana:

Follow me on Instagram --> christianavianne