I laid in my bed, staring up at the unmoving ceiling. I don't know what I was expecting, what I was waiting for, but I couldn't bring myself to turn on my side and fall asleep. Not after the events of the day.

I just wanted to talk to him, more than anything else in the world.

So do it, urged that simple voice, as it had been doing for the past hour or so. And it was becoming more and more difficult to not give in to those temptations.

So difficult that I gave up all together.

He invited me to see him, right? It's what he wanted. He wouldn't ask for me to go and see him if he didn't want me to go and see him. But then again, so many things have changed since then. What if he doesn't want me anymore?

Find James, the voice echoed, and I wasn't sure if it was mine or Thomas's, playing again and again through my mind.

I through the blanket off of my body and rose to my feet, hugging my arms to keep myself warm. Everything will be alright in a couple of minutes.

The hallway was unburdened by the whispering and murmuring of people, letting me here only the crickets chirping and the occasional bird singing even in the late hours of the night. I kept my footfalls as quiet as possible so I wouldn't wake anybody up.

I wandered around the corridors and back to the room where the tree was held. I had no where else to go, and it was the only room to which route I remembered, so I hoped that I could find James or at least somebody who knew where to go inside there.

The tree didn't look as amazing without the crystals wrapped around its trunk, but I still kept my distance away from it. It was hard not to respect the thing and all it could do, especially after seeing it for myself. I sighed and approached it, holding out a hand. I was curious, nothing more. Maybe I would feel what Thomas felt.

My fingers barely brushed the trunk of it when a voice from behind called out, making me jump and spin. "Alexander. There you are." I recognized the outline of James standing in the doorway. He didn't ask what I was doing, didn't comment on it at all. "Come on. It's this way."

"What's this way?" I asked, quickening my pace to catch up with him as he turned and started in the other direction.

"You wanted to see Thomas, right? Thomas is this way."

"How did you know?"

"He told me to find you."

"What if I didn't want to be found?"

James stopped calmly and turned to look at me. His voice was even, unfazed. "Well, do you want to go to him or not?"

"I—" I sighed, shoulders slumping in defeat. "Yes. I do." Those three words didn't fully encompass how much my hands ached to wrap around his body, how much my skin longed to feel his touch.

"Then he's this way." James started walking again, and he didn't say anything at all. He led me up endless flights of stairs and down hallways lined with birds perched sleepily anywhere there was space. I tried to memorize the route as best as I could, but the castle was far too expansive for me to have any bearing on anything.

Finally, James stopped outside a door. He nodded to me and left without so much as a goodbye. His intention was clear: I would have to make this decision for myself.

And it wasn't much of a decision at all.

As soon as he disappeared down the hallway, I drew open the door and slipped inside as quietly as possible, so I didn't wake him up.

The curtains to the windows—and there were many of them—were drawn back as far as they could go, leaving the room exposed to the lazy moonlight dripping in. I didn't pay much attention to the room itself, focused solely on the figure that was curled up in the bed suspended from the ceiling by four ropes of a material that was so thin and wispy it resembled mist.

I watched him for a moment, back against the door, before giving in and creeping over to the bed that hovered a few feet above the ground. I sat down and, not giving myself enough time to debate whether I should, brushed my fingers against his bare back gently.

My heartbeat quickened as he stirred. He turned over on his side, blinking up at me. I didn't move, didn't say anything, too afraid that somehow, I would mess this up. We sat there, frozen in position, for heartbeats.

Finally, Thomas smiled up at me. "You're here." One wing stretched out, lifting the blanket into the air and revealing the space next to him. He didn't have to say anything for me to know what he was offering. He held out a hand to me, one which I hesitantly took.

I slipped into bed besides him, and the instant I was laying down, he wrapped his arms around the back of my neck and brought his lips up against mine. I remained still for a second, completely taken off guard by the sudden feel of his body. But it wasn't long before I remembered what to do and cupped his face in my hands, kissing back with the same amount of feeling and passion that had been absent from my life when Thomas wasn't apart of it.

The kiss didn't last forever, though, as good things tend to never do. "Stars, Alex," he murmured, his lips now too many inches away from mine. "You're cold."

"I'm sorry, I—"

"Don't be sorry," he said, and that familiar rush of warmth spiraled away from my his touch and into the rest of my body. Letting out a contented sigh, he rested his head against my chest and relaxed.

"Thomas," I breathed. "Thomas, I'm so sorry for—"

"Alex?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we worry about all of that for the morning?" he asked, not moving, not looking up at me. "I'm tired."

I gave him a sorry excuse for a laugh, wiping away the tears from my eyes, and wrapped my arms around his waist. I breathed in the smell of freshly fallen rain, remembering just how lonely I was without it. There was so much I wanted to say to him, but as I opened my mouth to speak, I realized that I didn't have to say anything at all.

Thomas fell asleep a few moments later, his arms still wrapped around the back of my neck and his body still pressed so close against mine. I kissed his forehead lightly and listened to his slow and gentle breathing. And as I laid there next to him, I thought about how wonderful he was, and how much I had missed him, and how much I didn't deserve him.

I must have dozed off for a little bit myself, because one moment, I opened my eyes and was greeted by the soft glow of sunrise. I reached out an arm to find Thomas, disappointed he was no pressed up so close to me. "Thomas?" I asked, my voice hoarse. I felt around the bed, panicking when I was met with nothing but empty space.

"I'm right here," he responded.

I pushed myself up to find him standing in the doorway. Physically, he looked alright, but his eyes were tired, and he was hugging his body. "What happened?" I asked, throwing the blanket off of me and fully sitting up. "Are you alright?"

Thomas nodded, smiling, and joined me on the bed, his body turned so he was looking out the window. His back was to me, so I couldn't see his face, and I wondered if he had wanted it to be that way.

"What happened?" I repeated, sitting up and brushing my hand against his back. Divinity, his skin was so...warm. Warmer than usual, and perhaps warmer than was healthy.

"Nothing to worry about. Just my nightly Change is all."

"Your what?"

"You know—oh, I guess you don't know. Well, Angelica, Aaron, and I have found that's easier for me if I let, um, it take over every night. It's not fun becoming Peritum again," he said, trying for a laugh that came off wrong, "But you know, that's just how it is."

"That's... Thomas, that's horrible."

He shrugged. "Maybe so, but that's the way it is."

"Is there anything I can do to help?"

Thomas shook his head, then to my surprise, rested his head on my shoulder. I smiled, turned so he was against my chest, and wrapped my arms around him, staring out at the sunrise.

"You're still shirtless," I mumbled.

"I am. Does it bother you?" he teased.

"No! Uh... I mean, not really." I looked down at him and his smile, and everything else just seemed to fade away. "You know, you're really pretty."

He opened his mouth to respond, but his expression fell, and he pushed himself away from me.

"Thoma—"

"I should be angry at you. Fucking furious. You left me, and you didn't bother to explain why. How is that fair? You got so mad when I didn't tell you that I was becoming a Tenebrie, and then you turn around and leave without letting me know what I did wrong. How is that fair?"

His breathing was unsteady, his eyes darting to look at anything but me. "I should be angry, but I'm not. And I don't know why. I missed you. I missed you so much, and you treated me like I didn't matter to you at all, and for the longest time, I thought I had imagined what we had. You know, quite a few times, I just considered leaving. Flying off somewhere to die alone, so I wouldn't bother anybody anymore. But I guess I just really want to know what happened, Alex. I just want to know where I messed up."

I reached out to touch his arm, and his head bowed. "I'm sorry, Alexander," he said. "I just... I never wanted to fall for you, and look at what happened when I did. Is this what it's supposed to feel like? Did I do something wrong?"

"Thomas, it isn't your fault," I said simply, finding his hand with mine and squeezing it. "I'm afraid. Afraid that if I get to close to you..."

"You'll lose me," he finished when I couldn't find the strength to murmur those harrowing words. He sighed. "I want to make this work between us Alexander. I don't want to be that person who had happiness right in the palm of their hand, and let it go because they were too afraid that it would break if they tightened their grip. But if we want to continue, we can't do this again."

"You're right."

A silence fell before Thomas smiled and squeezed my hand back. "I'm glad you think so."

"Hey, Thomas?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm sorry for what I called you. You know, back in the cave. That...that was really horrible."

"Hey, it's fine," he said, his shoulders relaxing. "Really."

"I was really worried about you. Still am, to be honest. And I'm really glad you're okay. This whole lord thing... sucks. How are you feeling? I know that Changing can take a lot out of you."

"Well," Thomas said, bringing his hand to his cheek. "I bit the inside of my mouth."

"Oh?" I asked, amused.

"Yeah. I think I'm going to need some magic kisses to make me feel better."

I rolled my eyes but happily complied, moving my mouth to his. He fell back against the blanket, pulling me down with him.

"I'm sorry," I breathed, cupping his face with my hand.

"I've already forgotten all about it," he returned, his eyes glimmering with that light that I missed for far too long. He wrapped his arms around the back of my neck and closed his eyes, sighing happily as my mouth traveled down the side of his neck. The kissing slowly turned into something a bit more sensual, and soon I was leaving marks against his skin. It felt so right, so good, so perfect in ways I couldn't explain. He was beyond everything I needed, and yet I still yearned for more.

Eventually, however, he let out a sigh and sat up. "Maybe we should go downstairs."

"I don't want to," I whined, shortly before remembering myself and drawing away from him. I don't know, I guess I still felt like I was on shaky ground with him.

"Yeah, neither do I, but people will probably start to panic soon." He rolled his eyes at the thought and ran a hand quickly through his hair in an attempt to set it right. He frowned when it didn't work, and I couldn't help but smile. "What? Oh, leave me alone."

I wrapped my arms around him for a quick second, if only to breathe in his scent. "I forgot how cute you are in the morning."

"Cute? Please," he said, pushing me away as he went to the vanity and dressed. "I'm not cute."

"I think you're cute," I shot back as I stood up to join him and wrapped my arms around his waist.

"I like you when you're like this," he commented, offhandedly.

"Well, yeah. I'm like a lizard, right? I can't generate my own body heat, so I need something to do it for me. I need to get warm somehow."

"Oh, you bitc—" He wasn't given the chance to finish however, as the door flung itself open. Thomas's wings flew in front of me protectively, then relaxed when he saw who it was.

James paused in the doorway before shaking his head. "What have you been doing? You should have been up and going about twenty minutes ago. We have a lot we need to get done toda—Alexander, why are you in here?"

I frowned. "What do you mean—"

"Alex, uh, I may have something I have to tell you... later?" Thomas said, his voice dropped low.

"What did you—never mind," James said. "I don't want to know." He studied Thomas for a moment, then glanced at me and shook his head. "You might want...uh, to cover your neck. You have five minutes to get your ass downstairs."

Thomas saluted him, which didn't win him any points, and turned back to the mirror as James left. "I hate it when he's right," he muttered, adjusting the collar of his undershirt. I let go of him and leaned against the bed as he changed, looking up at the ceiling dotted with stars. I grinned at how that much more of a dork it made Thomas.

"Ready to go?" I asked when he finished changing.

"Physically? Yes. Mentally? No. Not at all." He sighed, his hand slipping into mine just as it always should have been. "Sorry, I'm just not prepared for what my mother will think when she finds out about this new little problem I've apparently created only to inconvenience her."

"It's gonna be alright. We just won't tell her."

Thomas shook his head. "She'll find out, Alexander. She always finds out. Should we head downstairs?"

For the first time in quite a while, I found myself truly happy. Listening to Thomas go on and on about all of the things he now hated with a burning passion was a luxury I wasn't sure I deserved. But I do remember how much I missed his gorgeous smile.

"So why'd you guys build the castle in a tree?"

"That's a great question. It's not really that safe, right? Someone lights a fire, the whole thing burns to a crisp," he said with a laugh. "I guess aesthetic purposes, because that's always more important than logic."

"Well, duh. Obviously."

As we entered the dining room, Thomas let go of my hand. I missed his touch the moment it was gone, and wondered how I went months without it. "Hey, come sit with us today," I said suddenly as he was just about to flash me a smile and head off.

Thomas looked around. "Are you sure? That would break quite a few rules."

"Since when have you ever been obsessed with rules?"

"Hah, fair point. Alright, you've convinced me."

"That didn't take much work," I noted as I dragged him over to the usual table.

"Well, anything to piss off James."

"What was with him anyway? I thought—"

"I'll explain later, okay?" His eyes lit up as they fell upon someone seated at the table. "Washington!" he yelled, and the next thing I knew, he teleported across the room to sit across from him.

I grinned and joined Thomas as he pushed Lafayette out of the chair across from the General. "I'm so glad you're here! Did you see my thing?"

Washington smiled and nodded to me as I sag down in the open seat next to Thomas. "I did see your thing. And I thought it was really good."

"Thanks! But you're wrong! It was really bad and stupid!" he said brightly.

"It was amazing, Thomas!" Lafayette exclaimed as he found a new seat to Philip's left. "Who knew you could sing like that?"

"I did," Hercules said, lifting his chin proudly. "Thomas, remember? The Bare Necessities? You remember."

"I do remember," Thomas said, "But that was different. That wasn't in front of hundreds of people. I get way too nervous and I don't do good enough—"

"That's not true," said Angelica without looking up from her plate of sweet bread and some weird fruit slices that tasted suspiciously like mango. "I think you'd make a great musician."

"Really? That's the nicest thing—wait a second. How do you what a musician is?" he demanded.

"They're a thing from Earth, right? Yeah, Alexander showed us."

Thomas's mouth dropped open. "That's right! Hercules, you told me about that, didn't you? And more importantly, you guys like music?" As the others voiced their clear agreement, Thomas grinned and started to gesticulate with his hands as he said, "Alright, I hope you guys have nothing planned for the next three hours because we're going to be talking about all my favorite musicals, starting with Chicago and slowly working our way up to Falsettos, and eventually we'll end with Wait—"

"Thomas?" interrupted a voice that made his shoulders fall. "What are you doing over here? We have work that needs to be taken care of."

"Mother—"

"This isn't up for debate, Thomas," she said before turning and walking away.

Thomas sighed and shrugged at us. "Sorry guys. I have to go. I'll see you all later, alright?" He stood up, smiled down at me, then kissed my cheek too quickly for me to react before teleporting away.

"Ah," Aaron said, shooting me a knowing look. "I thought he was happier than usual."

"So that's why you didn't come to talk to me last night," said Eliza with a self-satisfied smile.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," I returned calmly, trying to fight back my smile and ultimately losing.