Warning: This chapter was not only be updated late and lazily but also deserves rage from you guys, depending on what do you expect from this story. It also contained suicide attempts. 

CHAPTER 19

"For the time being, Haruka is staying at Shining resort," Tomochika said, earning surprised looks from Syo and Natsuki. Well, despite their disguise and both the best friends wore sunglasses in the midst of the cafe, what kind of response she should expect from them, then? "Apparently, she was still devastated with what happened to her marriage."

"Is it okay if we visit her?" Syo suggested. It was the genuine sincerity that had made Tomochika happy for Haruka. "I know I shouldn't have made her remembered the day but I guess... I just want to be there beside her."

"Well, she never said that she doesn't want to see anyone. You might be blunt and hot-headed..."

"Hey!"

"But you're compassionate and know how to comfort people. I believe both of you, Syo-san and Shinomiya-san can make her smile again," she said. "Or maybe you can bring Hijirikawa-san as well even just for a short while. You know, she has been worried sick about him."

"We wish we could, Tomo. We do but it's impossible. It's hard to contact him. Hijirikawa has a tight schedule and his father has a control over everything. His encounter with Tokiya and Ren was merely a coincidence. He and Tokiya used to hang out together a lot and that's the only way the magic showed some consideration to us," Syo said. After Ren informing them about Masato, he and Natsuki rushed to the café as soon as possible. It was chaotic when Natsuki could not hold back his tears and hug Masato happily. The blue head was terrified and his pale skin could not go any redder. They laughed as if they had not endured any pain and sadness in the first place.

"Then, are you guys going to let STARISH falls apart like that?" Tomochika said, eyes sized up in concern since this was not the side of them that she had always been familiar with. "At least persuading Jinguuji-san and Ichinose-san will do, right? And what's with Ichinose-san's attitude? Is he going to give up his second career after what he has gone through?"

"Yeah, probably. You do know how thick-skinned and determined he is, right? Ignoring what other people criticize has become Tokiya's second nature since who-knows-when," Syo remarked. With how complicated the problems and the people who suffered also refused to compromise, they could not bring themselves to have their drinks at the table.

"I tried to convince Ren-kun but he asked me to leave him alone for a while. He said that while he pitied Haruka and didn't want to see STARISH disband, he was no longer interested to invest his future in the band. It isn't fun anymore, according to him," Natsuki supplied.

The other two understood Ren right away. It was not fun meant they all no longer could not sing together as they used to be. It would not sound wonderful because there was no harmony anymore.

How could you maintain the harmony with a bunch of people who you no longer did not want to have anything to do with? How could you sound the best when you sang with a bunch of people who had conflicts and treated like toys by Otoya for loving the same girl? They could force themselves to be professional but for how long?

They all had the same dream but it did not mean they shared the determination to stay as a group no matter what.

"Come to think of it, Ichinose-san also thought the same thing, right? Those two might be harsh and mean at times but don't you think it's kind of odd for them to leave STARISH without taking time to ponder on it? If we are talking about who should leave, it should be Otoya-kun since he's the one who caused all the problems in the first place."

"Maybe they're still shocked by how Otoya-kun tried to frame them. It must be insulting for them," Syo stated. "Well, the rest of us were suspicious of them as well... Wait, of course we were. They both had to have such a great acting skill that we all believe that they were the culprits. Even that Hijirikawa... I don't know he has that mean look up until now."

Natsuki chuckled. "Ringo-san has stated in our class once that Masato-kun is an excellent actor as long as he doesn't have to hug a girl."

"Yup, that's our Hijirikawa Masato," Tomochika stated, decided to go along with Natsuki's attempt to crack the gloomy mood no matter how small it was.

"I wonder with how easily those three ended up leaving STARISH, does that mean our friendship is not that strong? Like we just need STARISH to fulfill our dreams and what not?" Natsuki questioned.

Silence passed and it was strange for Tomochika to see the ex-roommates to emit depressed vibes. Normally, they were the most chaotic pair in STARISH.

"Who knows..." she commented, just to fill in the blank air around them.

"To be honest, I have been thinking of that after I fought with Hijirikawa. He kept defending Ren while I screamed at him for insulting Natsuki's split personality. At the end of the day, one of us keeps caring about those who are really close with us. As for Tokiya, well... he wasn't that attached to anyone from the start..."

Syo averted his gaze to Tomochika which was when he realized she was about to say something.

"What is it, Tomo? Do you have anything to say?"

"It's nothing, really... It's not like my opinions matters..."

"It's okay, Tomo-chan. You can talk to us. I believe with you as the close friend of us, your insight is much more appreciated and trustworthy," Natsuki encouraged.

It was hard for Tomochika to smile at the compliment which could hardly be taken as a compliment.

"You guys do see me as your friend, I guess," she said, finally taking a sip of her lemon tea as her purple eyes wandered any space that they could reach.

"What? Of course we do. You're Nanami's friend so that makes you..." Syo could not finish his words as he finally noticed that the woman had stored something sad in her heart.

"That's what I am talking about," Tomochika cut him short with a small smile. "All this time, I thought your lives just revolve around Haruka as the composer and the love of your life. I believe that's how Otoya-kun sees it."

Those words were delivered softly but with an impact as strong as a slap.

"From what I have seen, you guys are not really attached to each other. You started with your hope to be the only graduation partner for Haruka but ended up as a boy band because all of you mean so much to her. She chose all of you while you guys had no choices if you wanted to sing her songs. But, as a regular listener, I do agree that you guy do sound the best when you sing together. I must say Haruka really knew what she did and look at where are you guys now! If it's not because of that stupid Otoya-kun, you guys will be the legend one day."

"Well, that's..." Syo shifted looks with Natsuki but no words threatened to escaped from his lips in order to defend themselves from Tomochika's claim.

"The answer is with you guys all along. Is it worthy to continue your career as a STARISH member when you guys already know each other's true colour after what happened? Is it worthy to risk your career reputation if you have one depressed and problematic member among you?"

For sure, they both could not answer the questions yet.

As soon as he was served the sight of his son being brought to him, handcuffed with his prison outfit, Raging Otori could not take it easy. With a fiery look, he ordered the officers to leave them alone.

"You son of a bitch!" He grabbed Eiichi collar before throwing a fist. Given Eiichi was still handcuffed, the man looked more like his punching bag than a son who he always used to obey his command. "Why are you always out of your mind? Why did you try to kill him instead of following my order?"

"It's because I don't want to be your dog anymore. I don't want to work as an idol who destroy others' life. It's coincidental that Otoya wants to destroy his father's career as well so we worked together in order to make you greedy bastards pay the price. Good luck for that, Dad. Soon enough, other HEAVENS members will also leave your agency and public will go mad about it. At least unlike you, I have done a good deed for the public, for the future idols that you're a maniac who can't accept the fact that Shining Saotome is always way better than him. You lose to him forever, Dad."

"Shut up!" Most probably Eiichi had the guts to provoke him since he had unofficial body guards around him who would protect him from his father's beating.

The greedy and heartless Raging Otori had failed to realize something about his first son until now.

The fact that Eiichi smiled more despite his messy look... it showed to everyone how he never felt like smiling sincerely from the bottom of his heart until now. His short interview with a bunch of reporters showed his smiling faces which attracted more sympathy and questions towards how Raging Entertainment managed its idols.

"From now on, I don't care about what happen to you and your goal to beat Shining Saotome. You and all of you can go to hell as far as I concern. I just want to stay here; free from you. I don't care if I end up here or killed here by Otoya's or Cecil's fans as long as I don't live my live worse than your dog. You can pursue your goal alone, Dad."

At this rate, all Raging Otori could do was shaking his head in utter disbelief.

Did Eiichi try to pull a sick joke on him? He was... what? Eiichi was more than willing to leave his glamorous idol world behind just to be free from him?

"You're crazy," he muttered which gained a proud snort from his first son.

"Not as crazy as you, Raging Otori."

With the simple sentence, Eiichi had given a strong hint that he did not want to have anything to do with his father anymore.

"Mother, Father, please calm down," like chants, those were the words that Aijima Cecil could say but his low and intimidated voice was quickly overpowered by his parents' loud voices as they kept insulting Saotome.

No outsiders were allowed to be in Shining Agency and those staffs knew why. The verbal attack of the emperor and empress of Agnapolis had immediately become the hot gossip among them that Saotome had ordered them, Ringo and Hyuga to postpone any interview and event. He did not want the rumors about the King of Agnapolis himself had come to confront with him circulated fast.

It was enough for the showbiz to witness the downfall of Raging Entertainment. He did not want to share the same luck with the agency.

As for Cecil, he had never seen his friends for weeks. His injured shoulder showed a good progress but his heart sank as he learned what his parents had decided for his future.

He must withdraw from STARISH and leave Japan for good.

His parents always pampered him. He was raised with unconditional love despite his father's family never acknowledged him and his mother. His father was always strict but soft-hearted when it comes to him. As for his mother, she was the politest woman that he had ever seen in his life.

But, since the shooting accident, they had proved that their love would protect him even it costed him to leave his very first and big dream. He had never seen his parents become this furious and Saotome was strangely calm about it.

"You promised us that you will ensure Cecil's safety. Even he's the one who protected that boy first, you should tighten your security in the first place!" Kotomi screamed at the top of her lungs, sending Ringo and Hyuga who were standing both sides of Saotome flinched. "This is why I didn't allow him to involve with someone suspicious like you. All you know is making my son walked straight to danger like this!"

No matter how many times Saotome tried to explain calmly... no matter how Ringo and Hyuga had sometimes interrupted to clear out their claims, they were always interposed back by the king and queen.

"I will bring Cecil with me. Full stop! Don't talk about him breaching your contract if you're going to risk Cecil's life like this. You..." the long finger was pointed straight at Saotome's face as she added, "There is no way I won't allow him to work for a jerk like you!"

That traumatizing choice of words... They echoed again in his ears and thrown to his face after so many years had passed.
"But, Mother..."

"Aijima Cecil..." Kotomi said, eyes almost glistened with tears that had stopped Cecil from defending. "I have always dreamed about a red-haired boy who might be the same age as you. I don't know him but every time I wake up from my sleep, I will feel sad because he always stands so far from me. I don't want to feel the same thing about you, honey. Please live with me again. You can do whatever you want but being an idol right here is not an option," as Kotomi turned and pointed at Saotome's face, she added, "I don't want my son to work here with a jerk like you!"

Saotome felt like he just lost a breath for seconds.

That traumatizing choice of words... They echoed back in his ears and thrown to his face after so many years had passed.

"I will raise him proudly and I will make sure that he won't end up as a jerk like you!"

That was what Kotomi had sworn when they had a big fight about Otoya back then but if she someday learned how Otoya ended up as he grew up, how disappointed she could be?

Mr. Hijirikawa was first, and then Mr. Ichinose and Mr. Jinguuji left the agency. Now, it's Mr. Aijima. Who is going to be next?

Miss Nanami?

He did confess to me...

He was the one who wanted to marry me...

There was no way he would use me just for the revenge unless he's insane...

But his life revolved around his father. Not STARISH... not me...

Her orange eyes might stare at her music sheets as if the idea or new melody would pop out on their own but her head, her heart... they maliciously reminded her of what Otoya had done all this time that she had been oblivious about it.

How could he... How dare he...

She did not only lie to Saotome. She did not only lie to Tomochika. She also lied to herself.

Haruka did not stay in the old resort because she wanted to clear her mind and come up with more new songs. She just wanted to run away from everyone.

She did not want to hear any comfort words from her friends in STARISH because she did not deserve it. She knew her place. After accusing them, she did not have any mask to put on to show that she wanted things to go back to the normal state.

That would be shameless of her after what had happened...

"Nanami!"

As the desperate yell of Syo ricocheted, that was when Haruka realized her position.

She was standing so close to the balcony and was staring downstairs intently.

How it felt to jump from the balcony? Would she forget everything once she was swallowed into the 'charming' darkness of death?

That sounded nice. Even Tomochika, Natsuki and Syo were currently looking at her in horror, nobody could change her mind now.

"What did you think you're doing!? We thought you're writing new songs for us!" Syo said.

"I was supposed to do that, Syo-kun. I have tried but I don't have any idea," she turned her gaze to a lot of crumpled music sheets from her side.

"Haruka, you're still upset, isn't it? I am here. You can vent on me all you want but please don't keep it to yourself."

"I am, Tomo-chan. I am crying so much that I doubt I have any tears left. This is all too crazy. I can't handle the betrayal. I can't handle the pain that jerk had caused me. It's all too much."

For Haruka now, Otoya was just a jerk.

Just like how Saotome was for Kotomi.

"Haruka, come here please. Don't stand too close with the balcony. It's dangerous. You might..."

"That's what I intend to do in the first place, Tomo-chan. Down there, it looks more convincing and comfortable."

"Haruka, please don't..."

"Good bye, everyone..."

It was too late. They should know it even when they decided to visit her and did not find her relaxing in her room.

Even when Saotome himself allowed her to find her peace in the resort.

But, Tomochika and Natsuki were convinced that they just lost their breath when another horrifying sight served them. In just blink of an eye, Syo rushed and passed them, swiftly threw himself to grab Haruka's hand but it was too late.

Both of them fell off the three-storey building.

Seconds passed but neither Natsuki or Tomochika had the strength to move and ensure the friends' condition. They quivered as they could not fully register the horrifying truth that they just witnessed.

It was all too fast. They thought the usually timid and soft Haruka would buy her time. They thought they could make it. They believed she had a bit of scare of height in her head that she would not decide on the end of her life that easy.

Apparently, that was wrong. Including with how Syo took the situation, despite how much he expressed his frustration with how Haruka treated them like plague, today's event had proved the other side of Syo.

Haruka's mixed opinion about them never changed his love for Haruka. That was why he jumped right away to save her.

With the losing strength left that desperately forced their long legs to keep standing on the ground, both Natsuki and Tomochika headed to the end of the balcony, throwing their scared look to the downstairs.

The sight was unbearable and drew Tomochika to tears right away. Her hands did not have the strength left so she dropped to her knees. Her purple long fingernails scratched the balcony unevenly and the next thing she remembered was Natsuki pulling her into his warm hug. He did not say much which told Tomochika right away that he was also trying to fight his tears from streaming down his face.

They both just could take the sight of Syo and Haruka; with the man held the woman protectively in his arms, surrounding with their pool of blood.

Otoya thought that Haruka was a nuisance who made his life complicated with her sincere love and loyalty. When he dumped her, he thought she would just recover right away. He thought she would easily move on given she had other six guys waited for her to reciprocate their love.

His friends were a bunch of good guys anyway.

But he was naïve and lost so many things because he was just too focused on his revenge on his father who never acknowledged him.

Otoya thought that he would find his peace once Haruka disappeared from his sight.

But just now, Ringo had notified him the most earth-shaking news for him.

Nanami Haruka, his wife did not just disappear from his sight. Rather, she left this world eternally. She decided to end her life after her own husband decided to abandon her forever.

What the hell am I doing?

What did I do to her?

Those questions were only words that clouded his mind even after he reached his wife's and Syo's funeral.

That was when he realized that he was the most terrible husband ever. He was not there with Haruka when she reached her breaking point, only for another man, Syo who loved her sincerely sacrificed his life to save her.

When everyone noticed his presence, the miserable Ren, Tokiya and Natsuki threw their glances away from him, did not bother to say simple words to acknowledge his existence. Most probably they barely could restrain their rage to him so it was the best for them not to interact with him at all to respect Haruka's and Syo's death.

But the thought did not work the same for Tomochika who immediately stood from her spot and walked straight to him. Otoya barely could register the first-time-ever rage had cast from the usually bright eyes of her before she slapped him.

It was loud enough for the whole room to hear but the only one who bothered to calm her down was Haruka's grandmother who barely had strength to hold her.

"Tomo-chan, calm down..."

"Why should I, oba-chan? This jerk is the reason why Haruka died! He used and dumped her like trash and he still had the nerve to show his face here!? I don't care! He must leave this place immediately or Haruka's spirit can't leave in peace!"

It was chaotic with Tomochika kept cursing at Otoya who for some reason, still did not leave the space. All the curses fell to his deaf ears. His red eyes still stared at Haruka's smiling face from the frame.

To say that he was broken-hearted was an easy term. It should have been stronger words to describe how he felt.

Haruka...

You left... so fast...

Two weeks passed since Haruka's and Syo's death which caused the sorrow to the showbiz. Otoya's name had emerged to the top search, either for the sympathy or insults. The fans war did not make anyone of them bothered when they had more issues in their plates to handle.

Even for Hyuga and Ringo themselves, it was full of headaches. They also expected to see Masato but he never showed up during Haruka's and Syo's funeral which was strange since the Masato who they knew was compassionate and caring despite his cool exterior. Ren and Tokiya could not contact him again since their latest encounter which they all concluded at last that the magic was behind the situation.

Until when the magic had wanted to 'mess up' with their lives? That was the question that had lingered around everyone these days since they were tired of the series of unfortunate events among STARISH.

Masato's disappearance...

Otoya's betrayal...

Tokiya and Ren's departure from Shining Agency...

Cecil who just survived from shooting but still could not convince his parents to allow him to continue his career as STARISH member...

Haruka's and Syo's death...

And now it was Natsuki...

He decided to leave Japan and stay with his family in France. He stated that he just wanted to clear his mind but given how glistened and wet his eyes all the time during their final conversation, Ringo and Hyuga did not see any shared future with the powerful vocalist and Shining Agency anymore.

"I don't know, Ringo-san. Syo-chan was always there for me. He was always there when I needed him so when he's dead like this, I felt unfair. I am angry but I don't know who to blame."

Obviously he blamed Otoya for everything but Natsuki was not the one who would pounce on someone who he hated and used violence unless he switched into Satsuki which was the horror of everyone. That was always his admirable personality trait but to see he tried his hardest to restrain his broken feeling to show was heart-rending.

So, they all decided to let him go until he was ready to return.

Now, Ringo and Hyuga only had Otoya to deal with. He switched his phone off, did not attend all the projects that he had signed up which costed Saotome to lose a lot.

Trust and profits.

So, Ringo and Hyuga decided to drop by the redhead's house, hopefully to offer some comfort and scolding.

"Oto-kun!" The high-pitched sound of Ringo's voice echoed along the hallway but no one showed up which was fine and understandable since it was early in the morning. Except for Otoya who decided to stay in his house, everyone might already leave for their works. "Please open the door, won't you? You won't resolve anything if you keep all of these to yourselves."

No answers.

"Ittoki, please... Ringo-san and I are here for you. You can work when you're ready but at least, let us see you and see how you're doing. I know it's hard for you to accept Nanami's death."

Silence passed, along with their patience which grew thinner.

"Is he still asleep? I guess we just have to barge in then. Who knows what's he doing inside?" Ringo said, reaching for the doorlock.

"Wait, do you even know what's the password?" Just when Hyuga voiced out his concern, the door was already unlocked after Ringo pressed a set of numbers. He earned a proud grin from the cross-dressing idol right away.

"It's Haru-chan's birthday. I just happened to guess correctly," Ringo explained as he pushed the door. "The boys said once that Oto-kun does love Haru-chan after all. It's just that he's being stupid."

"Hi, guys," they turned, gasping as without warning, Shining Saotome was already standing behind them.

This was weird.

"Shining, why are you here!?" Ringo could not contain his shock, eyes sized up.

"I guess I just have a free time and I have a bad feeling?"

Ringo stared at him unreadably before stating, "I think I have to go with the fact that you have a bad feeling. You and free time don't match well."

"But, I guess, we have to leave the talking to you then, Saotome. Ittoki must need someone closer to comfort him."

They nodded before slowly heading inside. Something in their chests tightened their breaths uncomfortably with the fact that they no longer could hear Haruka's sweet voice greeting them every time they visited the couple.

"But, where the heck is he? What's with this mess..." Ringo whined at how messy the living room had become. Pillows were thrown everywhere, TV remote was broken into pieces and pieces of a few vases scattered around the dining table.

No, it can't be...

Without words, Saotome barged inside, pushing the door of the master bedroom.

Seconds passed and when it was blatant what Otoya had done before he ended up in this current circumstance, the president took his time to digest.

He was taking his time because this truth and sight felt surreal.

"Oh my God..." Ringo exclaimed while leaning against the door.

The house was 'dead', as dead as the husband of the family who hang himself. A chair was pushed not far from his legs.

He just committed suicide.

Saotome dropped to his knees, eyes stared at the lifeless thin figure in shock.

No, it can't be...