Waking up without Alec was painful, and waking up at Ethan's was awkward, but I was grateful not to be alone somewhere at a hotel, especially after what had happened when I had been back home. We were up around the same time and had coffee together before we both had to head out for work. I promised to call and check in around lunchtime. He wanted to drop me off, but I didn't want to risk Alec seeing him and making things worse, which I'm sure a part of him had to realize, not that he probably cared.

Getting out of the car that Ethan had called for me, I grabbed my bags and headed into the building. Thankfully I had gone shopping before their fight yesterday and had something to wear into the office today, or that would have been embarrassing and a story for the gossip queens.

Throwing the bitches at the front desk a smile, I head to the elevator and hit the button. Just as the doors are about to close, Alec slips into the elevator. All of the air leaves my lungs. I could have sworn I had seen Ethan hit him yesterday, yet he had no marks on his face at all. He's still as beautiful as ever. Every hair on my body stands as if waiting for him to touch me.

Damnit. Why do I have to have this fucking reaction to him? I'm mad at him. Body...we are mad at him. Get it together.

I close my eyes and shake my head.

"You're mad?" he says quietly rubbing his hands together, looking at the elevator floor.

Throwing my bags on the floor, I hit the emergency STOP button on the elevator.

Oh hell no. If he wants to do this. We will do this.

"Am I mad? Am I mad, Alec? Are you fucking kidding me?" I yell.

He runs his hand through his hair. He's nervous. Good. Because I'm fucking pissed. I'm pissed because he hit Ethan and chose violence. I'm pissed because he lied to me. I'm pissed because he thought I would cheat on him. And I'm pissed because I can't fucking stay mad at him.

"You beat the shit out of my friend for no fucking reason. Violence, Alec. Fucking violence. After everything that I've been through." Tears are pouring down my face. I'm shaking. I haven't felt this level of anger in a very long time.

He's just standing there staring at me as if he wasn't expecting it. I never let him see this side of me. I never let anyone see this side of me. I'm always calm, cool, and collected Kelsey. Well, no more. I'm tired of the bullshit. I'm tired of everyone lying to me.

"Do you know why I even met up with Ethan, Alec?" I say through my tears. "Because of you. You decided that I needed friends and fucking tried to blackmail people and I wanted to know the fucking truth. Because for some goddamned reason, it's cool for people to walk all over me, do whatever they fucking want to me, but you know, fuck Kelsey, let's not be fucking honest with her. She's too fragile for the truth. Well, you know what, Alec. Fuck you!" Tears are full on streaming down my face now. "I fucking trusted you, Alec." I lean back against the elevator glass, defeat pouring over me, sobs wracking my body. After several minutes, I look over at him. He's just staring blankly ahead.

"Do you have nothing to say?" I spit out.

"I'm sorry, Kels. Everything was going so good. I just didn't want you to find out about Megan and everything to go to shit." Alec says quietly, his gaze shifting, staring at the floor.

Shaking my head, I look over at him. "So you blackmail people. Alec, that's so fucked up. You know that don't you?"

"I know." he says, his voice barely audible. "What can I say, I'm just like my dad after all."

Oh, hell no.

I walk over to stand in front of him, forcing him to look at me.

"That's bullshit and you know it. You're not your dad, but you need to take responsibility for this. Regardless of how much of a bitch Megan is, this was wrong. What if someone did this to me, Alec." Reaching out to grab his hands, I find his right knuckles are busted open and am reminded of Ethan.

"And the shit with Ethan yesterday, Alec. What the hell was that? That wasn't you." I step closer to him and his eyes burn into mine.

"Kelsey, I can't fucking see anything else when it comes to you. I can't focus. I can't reason. I can't explain it. That could have been anyone." he says looking at me, his voice level, but serious.

"Alec, you cannot go around beating the shit out of people who come near me. Ethan is seriously messed up, and I told you. We are just friends. Do you trust me?" I ask him.

Bringing his hand to my face, he brushes his fingertips across my cheek, sending electric shocks throughout my body making it extremely hard to focus or be mad at him. "Yes."

"Okay, then. What happened yesterday?" I ask, searching his eyes.

Alec pulls his hands away, running them through his hair again. Squeezing his eyes shut, he exhales and when he looks at me again there are tears in his eyes. Sharing is not the easiest thing for him. I can tell this is something that he's struggling with and he doesn't want to tell me. 

"Don't shut down on me, Alec. Let me help."

Nodding, he leans his forehead against mine.
"I've been having nightmares. Since the day at the hotel. And no, it's not your fault, so don't go there. I can't get to you in them. The thing yesterday, I don't know. It just put me over the edge." My heart tightens in my chest. I've never seen him like this and I hate it. Gone is my strong warrior. Standing in front of me is a very vulnerable and weak part of Alec that I never get to see. I would bet that no one ever gets to see it.

"Oh, Alec," I whisper. It doesn't excuse what he did to Ethan, but it breaks my heart, and I get it. Seeing him with another girl like that would be enough to make me lose my mind. Hell, I lost my mind with him at the reception desk. "You know I love you, don't you?" I ask him because what I am about to tell him can go one of two ways.

He nods, pulling me toward him.

"I stayed at Ethan's last night in his spare room. I didn't want to stay at a hotel alone. You know why." I say quietly as he goes against me at the mention of Ethan's name.

A few seconds pass as we stand in silence and I anxiously await his response. "I love you, Kelsey. I told you that I trust you, and I do, and I understand the hotel thing. I'm glad he was there for you, but please be careful with him. He likes you." he says looking down into my eyes.

I roll my eyes at him, but deep down, I know he's right.

"I love you," I say pulling him to me.

"I love you, too." he says. "Can we get off this elevator now?" he laughs.

I nod and reluctantly let go of him to pick up my bags. The last thing I want to do right now is work. Alec is supposed to leave tomorrow for his overseas trip and I still need to decide whether or not I am going. He hasn't brought it up yet, but I know that he will at some point.

"I have to check on a few things, but can we just go home? Are you able to work from home today?" he asks me as the elevator reaches my floor. He's leaning against a door frame. His black t-shirt raising slightly on one side and I can imagine the tattoos on his hip. 

Who could say no to that?

I have a million things to do as usual, but I probably could get a lot of it done from home. Shrugging, I smile at him. "I suppose it could be arranged. Come and get me when you're done?"

Leaning down to kiss me, I feel my body come alive at his nearness. "I won't be long," he whispers against my lips.

Nodding, I turn to find three newer employees staring at me with their mouths hanging open. Clearing his throat Alec says something about finding something to do, and the elevator closes.

As I'm about to close the door to my office, I hear one of the girls say, "Lucky bitch!". I giggle to myself.

Yeah, I kind of am. Lucky bitch to a hot fucking mess, but I guess we both are.

*********

Two hours later, we were sitting on the couch at the apartment. I texted Ethan and let him know that all was well and made sure he was okay, which he said he was. Alec said he would pay for whatever medical bills, not that Ethan needed it I'm now realizing, nor would he end up going to the hospital anyhow, but at least Alec was trying. I told him he needed to apologize, but I got a look. That was going to be a conversation for another time.

Sitting back with my laptop on my legs, "What time do you leave tomorrow?" I ask as I open a bunch of apps up.

Alec glances up from his phone. "Does that mean you aren't going?" he asks and I stop what I'm doing when I hear the worry in his voice.

"What do you mean?" I ask, looking over at him.

"You asked what time I leave tomorrow. Does that mean you aren't coming with me?" he says.

Shaking my knee, I am suddenly nervous. "I don't know. It's been so crazy lately, that I haven't had much time to think about it." I really haven't and when I have, I've been so back and forth about it. We've been doing nothing but arguing and that is the last thing that I want to do in a foreign country. When it's good with Alec, it's really good, but when we argue, we both can be really mean. 

Laying his head back against the couch, he looks at me and I can see the sadness in his eyes. My heart breaks.

"Don't do that," I say quietly.

"Don't do what?" he asks, giving me the biggest, saddest puppy eyes he can muster.

"Look at me like that," I say, laying my head back so we are at eye level with each other.

"I don't want to leave you," he says, moving my laptop, sitting it on the coffee table in front of us, and pulling me to sit on his lap so I'm straddling him.

"Can't you do a video conference or something?" I whine. To be honest, I don't want him to go or to be separated from him. I hate it when he leaves.

He laughs. "Not for this one babe." He grabs my hips and scoots me closer to him.

I groan leaning down to nuzzle into his neck.

"Come with me. It'll be fun. I'll do the meeting and then we can relax and get away for a while." he says, kissing my neck. It is tempting, but there is so much work with the holidays coming up.

"I've never been out of the country. I don't have a passport." I say.

He smirks. "I already got you one," he says. "I figured we would need it for our honeymoon anyhow," he adds, smirking.

I laugh. "How very sly of you."

"Please come with me," he whispers against my neck, his eyes burning into mine. It's so damn hard to say no to him when his fingertips are lightly trailing up and down my lower back. Fighting the urge to grind my hips against the growing bulge I feel against my bottom, I lean forward and try to slow my heart which feels as if it will beat out of my chest.

"Fine, but if I'm behind for the holidays, it's on you," I say grabbing his face and losing myself with this beautiful fucking human that I can't get enough of.