"Did you know that the jeep had satellite radio?" Bucky practically moaned as the tugged his leg out of a three foot drift.
"So we could listen to the live report of the police tracking our every move? No thanks." Clint sighed, but was kind of missing the heated jeep as well. "But just how much farther are we going to be walking because my feet are turning into toesicles!"
Bucky put a hand over his eyes, "Oh it's a little more than a kilometre to the docks, so we'll be there in less than a half hour maybe."
"Dude, I'm American. What the heck is a kilometre?" Clint snorted. "think miles perhaps?"
Bucky sighed, "тупой американец."
"Hey, I know enough Russian to know that that wasn't at all nice. You're American too!" Clint looked genuinely hurt.
That stopped Bucky in his tracks, "How did you know that?"
Clint frowned, " You told me you used to live in Brooklyn."
"I don't remember that." Bucky frowned like he was trying desperately to remember.
"That's alright it was a late night conversation, I barely remember it myself." Clint brushed it off lightly. " I'm sure it'll come back to you sometime."
"No not that, not the conversation." Bucky had dead look in his eyes. "Brooklyn, I don't remember Brooklyn.There is just this huge blank spot."
"What about your friend?" Clint was grasping at straws, he hated to think that Bucky had lived a collective ninety years and remembered almost none of it.
"I don't have any friends."
That line rung hard through Clint, pulling up a memory he didn't want to relive. He could literally almost see his younger self in Bucky. An elementary age Clint was sitting in the shadow of the schoolhouse with that exact same look of emptiness that was covering Bucky's face. The same answer he told his teacher when he was no older than eight.
"Clinton why aren't you with the other kids? It's recess, go play with your friends." The stern faced but kind hearted teacher whose name Clint had long forgotten stared down at him, casting a long shadow over his thin face.
"I don't have any friends ma'am."
It made Clint want to scream, no one should ever have to say that they have no one.
Without hesitation Clint slung an arm around Bucky and started walking, "Now that's where you are wrong, I'm your friend Bucky. Because I'm with ya till the end of the line."
Clint's last words seemed to pinch a nerve inside Bucky's mind , sending him to his knees and making him clutch his skull in agony.
"Bucky!" Clint dropped down next to him, not caring that the snow was melting and soaking the pant legs on the only pair of pants he had. "What's wrong?"
"Head.....oh god, bright. Ste-" The last word was lost when Bucky abruptly groaned and passed out face first into the snow.
"Goddammit!" Clint cursed as he tugged Bucky's face out of the slush and checked to see if he was breathing. Thankfully he was breathing, and wheezing and when he wasn't wheezing his breath came out in puffs like he had just run a 10k, but hey you take what you can get.
"Buck," Clint tapped his face lightly with the backside of his glove. "Dude, you okay?"
Clint got no response other than a slight twitch. "Wonderful, just bloody wonderful." He sighed hefting Bucky into a fireman carry and lifting their abandoned duffels into his free hand. Turning in a circle trying to figure out which way the docks had been he cursed again, and decided to go left into the wind where he could smell a slight fish/salt smell.
"Well, on the bright side." Clint mused. "At least I don't have to listen to him complain about the jeep anymore."
But as Clint trudged on he couldn't help feeling a tad lonely. Bucky wasn't exactly a talkative person, yet it felt good to have someone who understood why there wasn't any need to talk. To have someone for the first time in years that knew what he did and wasn't repulsed, to have a friend that he didn't have to lie to.
On the edge of his neck he felt a sliver of icy metal nudge him, Bucky's left arm had twitched slightly and instantly stuck out to Clint like a sore thumb. It wasn't like he had never noticed it before, it just was never a big deal to him, so what he's missing an arm? Clint was missing 80% of his hearing, everyone has something different about them, so he shrugged it off. But now he couldn't help but think back to himself stitching Bucky's side together and for the first time seeing the network of scars that spiderwebbed out from it. It almost looked like his metal arm had been stitched onto his shoulder then ripped off and welded on. It made he sick to think someone could do that to another human being, to see that pain in their eyes and know you were causing it.
Just as this thought crossed over his mind over a dozen faces resurfaced, staring back at him with a look of pain that literally tore into Clint. The faces of every person he assassinated for SHIELD, the faces of anyone who died on his watch. Ever single one digging thick, juicy chunks out of his soul.
"Calm down," He muttered to himself. "The people you killed were evil, they needed to die to keep other people safe." But he had a hard time believing himself, because deep down he knew he was a murderer just like Bucky had told him the night Bucky saved him from hydra.
Clint couldn't have wished harder in that moment for Bucky to wake up because he was suddenly scared, but not of anything in the natural world, he was scared of himself. He was a killer, a monster and a murderer who right now was hiking through god knows where Russia so he could catch a boat home.
That thought hit him straight in the chest. He was going home, back to New York, a place he promised he would never step foot in again as long as the people he loved were still there.
Clint wasn't just scared anymore, he was horrified, he was going home and he would have to face the truth.
_________________________
Natasha slumped into the passenger seat of the hummer like a sack of flour, that is if a sack of flour could be living on not even a hour of sleep and two kit-kats she stole from Tony. In the seat behind her Bruce and Tony were passing back and forth an industrial sized to go mug of instant coffee. Bruce was so tired that he didn't even taste the can of red bull that Tony had mixed in before they left the hotel.
The air inside the hummer was a mix of sleep deprecation, hostility and left over anger from last night. Once Steve pulled himself into the driver's seat the feeling thickened. She could practically feel Tony's eyes as the drilled into the back of Steve's head. With a sigh motioned for Steve to start driving and flicked on the radio, she didn't feel like breaking up another slap fight between Steve and Tony this early in the day. So instead she turned her attention to the news report sounding over the radio, it was in Southern Russian, the dialect she grew up speaking, which would've comforted her if it weren't for what the announcer was saying.
"Last Night tragedy struck at a show put on by an American circus; Carson's Carnival of Traveling Wonders, who was on a tour throughout Southern Russia. According to witnesses-"
What witnesses? She wanted to say, but she knew the other avengers didn't speak fluent enough Russian to catch what was going on, they were just going to have to wait until they automated voice repeats it in English.
"During the fifth act a masked man holding a bow descended from the rafters, shot and killed over five men who was trying to stop him. But he was not working alone, bullet wounds from a sniper rifle were also found on half the victims. This man and his accomplice are described as around 6'5 and well built, one with dirty blonde hair and the other with chin length brown hair. They were last seen fleeing the scene in a dark jeep without plates. If spotted do not engage these men, they are highly dangerous and are charged together with over a dozen counts of murder."
Natasha sat in brutal silence as the radio repeated it in English and Tony cursed in the backseat.
"Turn the radio off Natasha, they are just spouting lies. We know those men were hydra,Clint and Bucky would never murder those men unless they had to." Steve said.
"Unless they had to?" Tony echoed, "Like how your friend shouldn't be blamed for my parent's death because he had to?!" Tony's voice was getting a dangerous tone.
"Boys." Natasha said with a bit of force and was about to say something else but was cut off by Bruce.
"Shut up guys, listen to this." He leaned forward and turned the radio up just in time for the avengers to hear the next announcement.
"Ladies and Gentlemen just now police have uncovered pieces of the suspects' jeep twenty kilometres outside of town, near an abandoned shack. Police believe that the jeep caught fire due to faulty wiring and the fuel tank exploded, killing the two suspects. Though police haven't uncovered any remains yet, the search will take a week at the least, they are sure that they will eventually find the remains of the suspects. Thank you,that is all."
Tony let out a low whistle. "Just like that huh? We've been looking for Clint for so long and now he's most likely dead, for real this time."
"No." Natasha shook her head. "He isn't dead, we just have to keep looking."
Bruce frowned lightly, knowing now that Natasha would never believe Clint was gone unless she could put her hand on his neck and not feel a pulse. "Okay, what do we do now?"
Steve looked into the rear view mirror. "We keep listening for updates on the jeep, but until then we keep looking. We check all the airports within a hundred mile radius for two men traveling together that booked last minute tickets, then we check for any cheap hotels that they could be in. We turn every stone over. We tear this country apart until there is nowhere else to look."
"And then what?" Tony said.
"Then we go home and find a new way to find them." Steve's eyes were filled with a cold determination. "I lost my friend seventy years ago, I'm not going to stop until I have him back."
Natasha nodded. "Clint was and still is my partner, where he goes I go."m
A/N: I'm not sure why I'm writing right now because I'm tired and insanely sore (my class did our 24 minute run today). But I knew I wouldn't have time any other night because I have basketball and a science test. So as always I'm sorry for any mistakes and I hope that you comment and/or vote please. Thanks for reading!
-Brokenrook
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