Chapter 8 - "Sneaking Around Part I..."

Clara's PoV

'So Miss Clara. How are you this morning' Richard asked.

'I'm good. Little tired though' I smiled.

He was a really nice man actually, and he really loves Lilly. I can just tell by the way he looks at her. He might even love her more than she loves him.

But I was in a predicament of my own.

I think I had fallen in love with my Fathers footman, and there was no way out of it I was in love.

He even said he was going to leave and I begged him to stay. What does that say about my weakness?

For two weeks now we've been sneaking around and they have been the best two weeks of my life - especially since my Mother died.

Our trips down to the farm had become twice a week, and tended to end in me kissing him and him kissing back. He hasn't once kissed me - and I know that's because he would be out on his ass in a heart beat which is why I know I like him because I'm the one egging him on.

The one drawing him in.

I had snuck down to the library every night this week to see him, and ended up helping him with his reading and writing this particular evening.

I wrapped the blanket around myself, about to settle into my Jane Austen favourite when he huffed in front of me.

'What's up?' I asked leaning forward.

'I just can't get it. It's a simple task. Just write on the lines but I can't seem to do it'

'Just take your time and follow the letters' I encouraged, looking into his eyes.

Damn those fricken eyes because they are what are killing me. Those green eyes.

'Have you ever thought about sitting some exams John? Get some qualifications?' I asked. 'You know... Something to work towards?'

'Maybe. But there not cheap. I mean I'm saving at the moment but I'd really like to be able to get my own place. Maybe a little cottage instead of relying on living here. And I know that I'm fed and that here but I'd like to be able to provide for myself one day'

'Not if you lived with me' I said and realised I had said that out loud.

That wouldn't happen unless we took off and fled the country away from my father. Because there's no way he would approve of this.

'That's highly unlikely to happen though is it Miss Clara? I can't stick around forever. And it's only a matter of time before your father finds out everything your doing for me... It's probably best that I go'

'No. Please not yet. Just stick around for a little longer' I begged.

I wasn't sure what I was going to do. I mean he's a footman and I barely know him, but I know that I can't let him go from my life yet.

- - -

Why are we going a day early Miss Oswald?' Amy asked.

'Because if I have to suffer this stupid date then the least my father can do is allow me to go shopping, and seeing as he did. That's what we'll be doing. And I still owe you a birthday present so you can have that haircut you've wanted if you like?'

'Really?'

'Of course. I did promise' I chuckled, as she ran from the room.

I heard someone cough at the inside of the door and knock slowly. 'I've umm-- I've come to get your bags' he said.

'Oh. Okay. They're there' I said pointing at them.

'Your going to London right?'

'Yeah. Don't know why. But apparently this man resides in London' I said rolling my eyes.

'Well I'll be in London tomorrow also. I've got a few things to get for your father. I managed to convince him not to come with you'

'John. This date. It doesn't mean anything' I whispered closing the door.

'Yes it does Miss Clara. You need to find a man who is suited to you. Who can provide and help with the estate. I'm not that man. Now go and have fun. I've just come get your bags' he said hurriedly leaving from the room.

I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to go on this date. I wanted a date with John. But that was never going to happen... Of course he is going to be in London.