Mid afternoon, Lunch had just ended. It was fifth period. I wasn't the only one who knew, but I was one from a hand full of people. I had no feeling but being afraid. Afraid of dying, but yet not wanting to live because of death.

No matter how badly I wished to know home, I had never really gotten the chance too. But I had realized how heart broken people will be when they found out. How can I be so rude and not shed even a single tear? How can I be so selfish? Can I not at leas f cry a little, or act as if I know nothing of him and on about my day? I already could tell that I am a rude person and refused to speak of Kyle.

It was lunch and I could see the smiles of almost every kid, just laughing because they didn't know what I knew. I knew nothing but that.

After lunch I just looked down in sorrow. I can slowly feel my heart break because of him. Him. Him, what a horrible word to say about a kid who was only two years older than me.