Confessions
I was dreading Sunday like anything. Maya and Neha couldn't stop teasing me all week. All I wanted was for the week to end. Then again, I had to sit through lunch with them.
It was Saturday and I was having dinner with my brother and sister in law.
"So, about tomorrow, are we going out for lunch...?" Gunjan cut in before Karthik could even finish the question.
"No. We are preparing lunch."
"Are you sure?"
"Yep, I am really confident that you both can manage it."
"Oh yeah, madam is going to use her pregnancy card on us."
"And I believe you are also half responsible for me being in this situation."
Well, recently this had become a common occurrence. Karthik would blame her on using the 'pregnancy card', as he liked to put it, all the time and she would blame him for landing her in that state. They would argue back and forth for a while and then make up.
"Stop it guys, I get it. You've been having this conversation for days and believe me, I know how this ends."
"All right."
"You are right." Both of them said together.
"Thank you; now let us get to the matter in hand. I am okay with preparing the food. Gunjan just tell me what would you like to eat."
"Why does she get to choose?"
"Repeat the earlier conversation in your mind and the ending line I believe will be 'she deserves it Kavya, after all she is carrying my child." I said and Gunjan laughed.
"True that."
I was preparing a list of the items I needed to prepare food the net day when Gunjan came into my room.
"Bhabhi, do you need something?"
"Oh come on Kavya, can't I come to your room for no reason?"
"You sure can." I said while she sat down on the lone chair in my bedroom, the seat I earlier occupied.
"Wrote down everything you need?"
"Yes. Do you want me to make you something specific?"
"What are you making?"
"Well, for starters I am making vegetable cutlets. For main course we have Chicken Biryani and for dessert I am planning to make Gulab Jamuns."
"Awesome. But make sure you stuff the cutlet with well mashed potatoes. Well, just potatoes and chilli and onions, nothing more."
"Sure, I'll make it the way you want them."
"Great, now since that is settled, there is something I want to talk to you about." She said.
I sat down on the edge of my bed, facing her.
"What is it Bhabhi? Is there something going on between you and bhai?" I asked as she seemed reluctant to speak.
"No, no. Everything is fine between us. The daily banter is nothing."
"I am glad to hear that. So, what did you want to talk about?"
"I want to talk about you Kavya."
Oh, I know where this conversation is headed.
"What about me?"
"You know, Kavya, you really do know. I want to talk about Gaurav and the fact that he has feelings for you."
"I know."
"And..." She asked expectantly.
I wasn't sure if I should tell her about me liking him, after all we were having dinner tomorrow and Karthik and Gunjan were not so good at keeping secrets.
"There is nothing."
"Oh please Kavya, I saw the way you looked at him. Don't try to fool me. I know you like him too."
"Is it that evident? Does he know?"
"It isn't that evident. And I am pretty sure he is oblivious to the fact that you like him."
"Good, I want to keep it that way."
"Why Kavya, why can't you just admit it to him that you like him too."
"I guess I am not ready. I don't know when I started liking him. Knowing him, he would want to take it to the next level and I am not ready for that."
"Then let him. I have a good feeling about this guy. He is good for you."
"You are probably right; still, I don't want that at the moment. I promise I will think about it and you'll be the first to know when I make a decision.
The next morning, after a quick breakfast I went to work. Karthik got me the essentials and was there for helping me with whatever I wanted. Gunjan kept us company.
I worked on the cutlets after leaving the biryani to cook. I then did my dessert. I fried the jamuns and left them in the sugar syrup and kept them aside. It was around twelve by the time I was done. They were coming at twelve thirty and I had to be ready.
"Karthik, I am leaving the jamuns on the stove, do turn the gas off after two minutes." I didn't have time to stick around till I made sure it was soaked in the syrup.
"Sure." He said and I rushed to my room.
I took a quick shower and dressed in my dark jeans and off-white blouse. I heard the doorbell ring. I dried my hair and tied it up in a pony-tail. After applying a little Kajal and lip gloss, I looked presentable.
"Hi." I said as I entered the living room.
Sneha and Rahul were the ones who had come.
"You boss here was explaining to us why they are here now after they promised to come early."
"Oh, I am not her boss, Gaurav is. I rarely even get to see her."
I chose not to comment on that. But, Karthik did.
"Oh yeah, where is he? I told him to be here by one."
"Gaurav is coming?" Rahul asked.
"He didn't tell you? He was here when I came in on Saturday and we talked and I invited him."
"Gaurav was here huh?" Rahul asked with a glint in his eyes. The same look Maya and Neha seem to share while talking about Gaurav and me. That can't be good.
"What is that smell?" Sneha asked and I noticed. It was coming from the kitchen.
"Bhai did you switch off the gas after two minutes?" I asked walking into the kitchen.
"When did you ask me to do that?"
"She did, before she left to get ready." Gunjan said.
I opened the lid to see all my gulab jamuns stuck to the bottom of the pot. Most of them had turned black. The sugar syrup had all dried up after being left on the gas for about half an hour.
"Thanks to you dessert is ruined." Gunjan accused.
"We can always have ice cream love." Karthik said while Rahul and Sneha laughed at his misery.
"I am sorry Kavya that all your hard work is ruined, but, it is always nice to see Karthik suffer."
"I hate ice cream."
"You know you are the first pregnant woman I have seen who hates ice cream."
"Oh really, how many have you dealt with."
Karthik seemed to struggle finding an answer to that, but luckily for him, the doorbell came to his rescue.
"I'll get the door." Karthik said.
"No, Kavya can get that. We are not done."
I looked at Rahul and Sneha, "oh, we are good here."
I opened the door to a smiling Gaurav."
"Hi." I said and moved away from the door, making space for him to come in.
"Hi." He said and stood there. He was wearing a black V-neck tee with Khaki pants. His hair was gelled to the right side, to perfection.
"Come on in."
"Yeah, right."
I closed the door and led him to the living room. I was glad when I saw the four others there, back from the kitchen.
I stood there as they exchanged pleasantries.
"This is for you. I prepared some Kheer. When I told my mother I was coming here for lunch and that you are pregnant, she insisted I bring this." He said handing over a bag I hadn't noticed before to Gunjan.
"Thank you. You are a life saver. We were out of dessert as Karthik over here had decided not to switch off the gas on time."
"Oh then, I guess I justified your inviting me for lunch. Again, thank you for having me."
"Oh, it is a pleasure." Gunjan said, eyeing me all the while.
Lunch was anything but a silent affair. There were lot of stories from their college days being shared. After all, the five of them were in the same compound for all those years. But, they did let me feel left behind as Rahul and Gaurav also talked about how cool they are as the owners of KR Associates.
The kheer he prepared was delicious. I wasn't surprised since he had once mentioned to me that he cooked for himself most of the times and cooking was a hobby.
"I never knew you could cook." Rahul said to Gaurav.
"That is because you weren't paying attention."
"Excuse me."
"Man, you've been eating the food I prepared from our first year in college."
"You cooked those?" Rahul asked, clearly shocked.
"Now we are talking."
"You never told me. I just assumed your mother cooked those."
"Well, I did the first time. But you weren't listening. Since I wasn't trying to impress you, I let it go."
I volunteered to do the dishes and sent them back to the living room.
"Hey." Gaurav said, joining me in the kitchen.
"What are you doing back here?"
"Well, they were talking about the days they met and it was in some kind of code language. I got bored sitting there and I thought why sit there when I could always come talk to you."
"Oh.."
"Do you need any help?"
"No thanks.. I am almost done." I said truthfully.
"Good then, there is something I need to tell you."
"What is it?" I asked and dropped the bowl I held in my hands to the sink.
"Finish it first, and then we'll talk."
I quickly cleaned the dishes and finished off by wiping the table.
"Sit down Kavya." He said pulling a chair for me at the dining table. He occupied the nearby chair.
"Before you say something Kavya, listen to me."
"Okay." I had an idea about what he wanted to say.
"I don't know where to start. Clearly, I haven't done this before. I don't want to be overly dramatic. So, here it goes. I like you Kavya, I don't know when it happened, but it did. I have tried to contain my feelings, but I don't think I can do that any longer. I don't know what you think about me. I just want you to give me a chance. I know you've been hurt before. Just give me a chance to show you that you deserve better. I don't want you to make a decision right away. But, please think about it. And if it is the worst case scenario, and your answer is no, I hope this doesn't make it awkward for you in the office. Will you think about it?"
"I will." I somehow managed to get those to words out, but I am not so sure he heard me.
He joined the others in the living room and so did I after a few minutes. Every time I looked at him, it was like a sword hanging above my head. I had to make a decision, probably the biggest one I had to in a while.
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