❝ There's only one way to find out. ❞

―

JULY 6, 2019.

Theo and Five sat next to each other outside of the academy, using cinder blocks as seats. Five was writing away in one of Theodore's notebooks, scrawling math equations on the pages. Originally, the boy had been using the pages of Vanya's book, but Theo thought he needed more space and, thus, gave him a notebook.

It had been months since Five had begun mapping out the equations, and the boy had spent very little time taking a break.

"You're doing it wrong again," Theo proclaimed.

Five turned to look at the boy next to him, annoyance present on his face. "I am not doing it wrong!"

"Really?" Theo asked, raising an eyebrow at him. "Because I can see multiple wrong equations."

"Oh, really?" Five questioned, looking back down at the page. "Where?"

"For instance, that one is wrong." Theo pointed at one of the equations, moving his finger to another. "That one's wrong." He tapped another equation near the bottom of the page. "And that decimal is in the wrong place."

"Why don't you do it then if I'm so wrong?" An irritated Five asked.

"I will!" Theo said as he grabbed the notebook and pen from Five's hands. He began reworking the wrong solutions.

When he was finished, he held the notebook and pen in front of Five. "There."

Five grabbed the notebook and glanced down at the page to look over Theodore's work. Surely enough, his answers were correct and made more sense than the answers that Five himself had originally written. But there was no way that he was going to admit that he had in fact made a mistake, even if most of them had been a tiny miscalculation.

"And I'm just supposed to trust that what you wrote is right and that I was wrong?" Five asked.

"Yeah," Theo nodded in response. "Pretty much."

"Well, what if you're wrong?" Five asked, trying to get him to admit that maybe there could be a slight possibility.

Theo shook his head confidently. "I'm not."

"But you don't know that. These are complicated equations, Theodore! Equations that even Albert Einstein and Isaac Newton themselves would not be able to comprehend without extensive trial and error," Five pointed out. "Do you know how long it will take to figure out the exact formula and coordinates that we will need in order to get back to the right time to stop the apocalypse?"

"Quite a long time, I assume. But this is just the very tip of the iceberg. Aren't you the one who said that it can't be solved in a single day?" Theo answered in response. "It's been almost two months, and we've barely even scratched the surface. You even said so yourself; it's trial and error. We could get it wrong a thousand times over. But I assure you, I'm not wrong."

"You're what, fourteen? You speak awfully confidently for a boy who never took anything past algebra," Five argued with him.

"I'll have you know, math is my best subject," Theo said as a matter of factly. "I was taking Pre-AP Algebra, and I was doing my times tables and division at age four!"

Five scoffed in disbelief. "That's bullshit."

"And how would you know? Were you there?" Theo shot back. "Quiz me right now. Give me any math problem, and I'll solve it."

"And how am I supposed to know if you're not just lying to me and making the answer up?" Five wondered.

Theo shrugged. "Guess you'll just have to figure it out on your own, genius."

Five rolled his eyes at the boy. "You are actually quite insufferable sometimes. Did you know that?"

"I could say the same thing about you. Or do I need to remind you that you quite literally dragged me into this mess?" Theo responded. "You only brought my annoyingness onto yourself."

Five's face fell. "I thought you said you were over that."

"I am. For the most part, at least," Theo told him. "That doesn't mean I can't hold it over your head every once in a while."

Five shook his head as he rolled his eyes. "Insufferable."

"As are you, Five-A-Roni," Theo replied.

Five cringed, his lips curling in disgust at the nickname. "Don't ever call me that again."

"Why?" Theo asked. "Does it bother you?"

Five nodded. "Yes."

"Then I think I'll keep calling you that," Theo teased him.

Five let out an exasperated sigh. "Why'd I have to end up here with someone as annoying as you?"

"Admit it, you'd be soooo lost without me," Theo continued to tease. "If not for me, you'd spend your time speaking to that mannequin we saw buried in the rubble."

"Right now, I'm starting to think I'd enjoy her company much more than yours," Five replied. "At least she can't annoy me when I'm trying to get us out of this hellhole."

"Fine. I'll leave you alone," Theo said, reaching for his backpack. "But don't come crying to me when you realize even more of your math is wrong."

Five shook his head, immediately continuing to work. Theo couldn't help but smile at him as he unzipped his backpack. He pulled out his notebook and a pen. Theo began to write:

I have found that I quite like annoying Five. It's become one of my favorite pastimes.

It's so easy to get on his nerves. Sometimes it feels like I barely even have to try at all.

As of late, we haven't really talked much. He's been far too focused on trying to work out the right equations and pinpoint the correct coordinates to return to. Though when he does talk to me, it's usually just small talk and to read books at night as we eat and before we call it a night.

Speaking of, the summer nights have become a whole lot brighter. While it did not get too dark before (we are both in agreement that it appears the fires caused that, as it seemed much darker after they had gone away), summer brought upon even brighter nights than ever.

It gets darker later and does not stay too dark for long. But that's okay with me. I was never really fond of the darkness.

Five and I have appeared to settle into somewhat of a routine. When we wake up, we eat our rations and then scour the city to see what other food and supplies we can find. We spend hours wandering, sometimes not even looking for anything in particular.

Then we return to our base camp, where we eat. At this point, Five usually reads from a book, and then we call it a night.

But for the last few weeks, Five has been focused on trying to figure out the equations to pinpoint how to get us back in time to stop the apocalypse.

He's been trying to practice his special jumps as well, but his luck seems to be few and far between. I know he's trying his best.

I've tried not to blame him as much for taking me with him to the apocalypse, but it's hard sometimes. I find myself wondering what I would be doing differently had Five not bumped into me. Would I be watching a movie with Malina? Helping Mama Laura clean?

It had been so close to Christmas when I left. I wonder what Mama Laura had bought for me. Did Malina get the Polly Pocket dolls she had been wanting? Did they still bake gingerbread cookies and decorate the tree?

I hope that they were not too sad without me and that their lives continued to move forward. I wonder what Malina had done before the apocalypse happened. Did she achieve her dreams? She would have been twenty-three when the apocalypse came.

If she's out there somewhere—if her body is out there—I have not found out. I'm not sure that I want to. But there is no other living soul here besides Five and I. No animals are scurrying around on the ground—only bugs. No birds chirping in the sky. No other humans. None alive, at least.

Theo sighed and closed his notebook. He was beginning to run out of paper, reaching the last few pages in the book. He placed it back in his backpack, which was now covered in layers of ash and dirt.

"Could you sigh quieter?" Five asked, his eyes remaining glued to the paper on his lap. "I'm trying to focus."

"You are such a crotchety old man," Theo asked, leaning in closer to look over Five's shoulder. "How's it coming along, Five-A-Roni?"

"If you tell me I'm wrong, I will not hesitate to throw a rock at you," Five threatened.

"Actually, it all looks right." Theo nodded his head before he pointed to an equation. "Except for that one—"

Five reached down to pick up a rock in his hand and held it up in the air, causing Theo to flinch.

Theo held his hands up, surrendering. "I'm kidding!"

"Have you made it your personal mission in life to annoy me?" Five asked as he threw the rock down.

"There's nothing else to do," Theo said with a shrug. "And you wouldn't have this problem if you hadn't—"

"Dragged you here with me," Five interjected. "Yeah, yeah. I know."

...

SEPTEMBER 17, 2019.

Five once again sat on a cinder block, his nose buried deep into the notebook in his lap. With a pen in his hand, he wrote equation after complicated equation onto the page.

"For Pete's sake, Five, take a break!" Theodore rolled his eyes at him. "You've been at it for three days in a row now. Have you even slept at all?"

"It's been months, Theodore!" Five snapped, his frustration directed not at Theo but rather at the lack of progress. "Months and nothing. I can't figure this out, and I still can't jump."

Theo leaned down next to him, placing a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Look, I want to get out of this hellhole just as much as you do, but you're overworking yourself. You have to take a break."

"I can't take a break!" Five groaned.

"Yes, you can," Theo said, nodding his head at him.

"There will be plenty of time for breaks once I—" Five's sentence was cut short by Theodore grabbing the notebook out of his hand. "Give that back!"

Theo shook his head, hiding the notebook behind his back. "No."

"Theodore, give it back!" Five tried to reach for the notebook, but Theo pulled it away before he could.

Theo held the notebook over his head, grateful for the fact that he was taller than Five. "I will give it back once you have eaten and rested for more than two minutes."

But Five outsmarted him, standing on the cinder block to reach for the notebook. "Why do you care so much about whether or not I eat or sleep?"

Theo was quick to react, stepping out of the way before Five had the chance to grab it. "Because, believe it or not, I do care about you. It's been six months, Five. You really don't think that I haven't grown to care about you as crotchety and annoying as you are?"

Five sighed. "I don't understand why."

"This self-depreciating attitude you've got going on has got to stop. I know you still blame yourself for taking me with you and uprooting both of our lives, but you have to stop beating yourself up over it," Theodore told him. "I know I don't help matters by constantly reminding you of it. I was angry with you. I was so angry at the beginning, but I don't blame you. Not anymore. So stop blaming yourself. Do you understand me?"

Five continued to try and reach for the notebook, but Theo would not let him have it.

"Do you understand me?" Theo repeated.

Five stopped reaching for the notebook and simply nodded.

"You're my best friend, okay?" Theo told him.

"You—you consider me your best friend?" Five asked in disbelief.

"I do," Theo confirmed. "Whether you want to be or not, you're stuck with me."

Five stared at him, his eyes softening. "I think... I think you're my best friend too."

Theo stared back at him, their eyes interlocking. Theo's lips spread into a smile. Five gave the boy in front of him a small smile back. The only sound that could be heard was the howling of the wind.

Theo cleared his throat. "Now, would you please eat something?"

Five nodded his head. "Yeah."

"Good," Theo replied, placing the notebook inside his backpack. "You can have this tomorrow morning. Don't even try to sneak it out of my bag. I'll know. Understood?"

Five nodded. "Understood."

Theo slept on his backpack that night, using it as a pillow so that Five would not be able to sneakily grab the notebook while he was asleep.

...

OCTOBER 1, 2019.

One hundred and eighty-three.

That's how many tally marks Theodore had in his notebook. It was October 1st—that much he knew. He was able to figure out what day it was by counting the number of tallies. It also meant that it was Five's birthday, and Theo was determined to give him the best birthday he could imagine. Theo assumed that Five's father, Reginald, had never given any of the children a proper birthday present or celebration. Five had mentioned that his mother, Grace, would bake them cakes, but Reginald had never allowed them to actually eat them.

Though Theodore would not be able to make Five a cake, he was going to do everything he could to make Five's birthday special. He had woken up before Five that morning. If Theo remembered correctly, there used to be a party store a few blocks from his home. If he was lucky, he might be able to find some sort of party or festive decoration that had survived the apocalypse.

Theo reached the store and immediately began to search through the rubble. It had taken him what seemed like forever to find, but Theo had managed to find an old "Happy Birthday" banner. Part of the lettering was burned off, so it read "appy Birth" instead. Theo couldn't help but chuckle. It was better than nothing, and he was sure that Five wouldn't mind.

Theo rose to his feet and stepped through the rubble. He stepped on something. He stopped and glanced down to see what it was. It appeared to be a box of sorts. Theo reached down and picked it up. A smile came to his face when he realized what it was.

In his hand was a box of Twinkies that had somehow managed to go untouched. Well, at least they had until he stepped on the box. Theo opened the box, seeing that only a few of them had gotten smushed. Aren't Twinkies supposed to have an endless shelf life? Theo wondered. Theo didn't know if that was necessarily true or not, but it didn't hurt to find out.

Theo continued moving, carrying the burnt banner and the box of Twinkies with him back to the academy. Five was still asleep by the time he got back, which Theo was thankful for. One: Because Five had spent very little time sleeping. And two: it gave him time to figure out how he was going to set up.

He ended up having to hold onto the banner, having no where to place it or anything to hang it from. He still had the Twinkie box in his backpack, along with a gift that he had found for him a week ago.

Theo wrote in his notebook while he waited for Five to wake up. When he heard the boy shift, he set down his notebook. Theo stood up and grabbed the banner from the wagon, where he had placed it.

Five sat up and yawned, blinking his eyes as he stretched. Theo quickly hid the banner behind his back, keeping Five from seeing it.

"Hold on! Close your eyes and don't open them until I say, okay?" Theo called out.

"Uh, why?" Five asked, confused.

"Just do it," Theo replied.

Five sighed and closed his eyes. Theo held the banner out in front of his chest.

"Okay, open your eyes," Theo told the other boy.

Five opened his eyes and stood on his feet. glancing around for his friend. He looked to the side, his eyebrows furrowed slightly when he saw the sign Theo was holding.

Theo smiled at him brightly. "Happy birthday, Five!"

Five couldn't help but smile back.

"I know you never really had a birthday celebration, so I wanted to do something special for you," Theo told him. "I know it's not much and that the sign says appy Birth, but it was the best I could do."

Five chuckled. "It's great. Thanks, Theo."

Theo smiled at him, setting the banner back on the wagon. "Wait, it gets better."

Five kept his eyes on him as he watched Theo reach down and grab his backpack. He walked closer to him, and the two boys were now standing in front of each other. Theo pulled two things out of his backpack.

The first one was something that was wrapped up in an old newspaper. The second was a slightly crushed box of Twinkies, partially charred and covered in dust, looking as if it had been stepped on.

"I got you something," Theo said as he held the gift out in front of the other boy.

Five stared down at it and then back up at Theo. "You didn't have to get me anything."

"I wanted to," Theo replied, pushing the newspaper-wrapped gift at the boy's chest. "Open it."

Five sighed, knowing that Theo wasn't going to take no for an answer. He slowly unwrapped the newspaper and stared down at the gift in his hands. It was an expensive-looking watch that somehow seemed to be completely void of any wear and tear from the apocalypse.

Five glanced up at Theo, a smile forming on his face. "Where'd you find this?"

"It was in the department store that we went to the other day," Theo told him. "You know, the one with the mannequin? The one you joked about marrying? I thought it would make a nice gift. Do you like it?"

Five chuckled as he nodded his head. "I do. Thank you, Theo. It looks brand new."

"I know," Theo replied. "It's kind of weird, huh?"

Five nodded in agreement. "And what about that?"

Five pointed down at the box of Twinkies. Theo held them up, both boys looking down at the box.

"Oh, I found them at that old party store," Theo answered. "I thought maybe they could be a substitute for cake."

"Aren't they supposed to have an endless shelf life?" Five questioned. "Or is that just a myth?"

Theo shrugged. "There's only one way to find out."

Theo pulled two Twinkies out of the box, placing it down on the wagon. He handed one of the Twinkies to Five. Both of the boys started to open the packaging.

"It looks normal," Five points out, examining the snack. "There are no obvious signs of mold. Normal twinkie-like texture. Or, well, what I suppose is normal. Shouldn't it be as hard as rock if it were expired?"

Theo shrugged. "I don't know. It doesn't smell bad either."

Five continued to look down at the snack cake in his hand. "You know, most baked goods actually have a shelf life of around 25 days. It's been, what? One hundred and eighty-three? Maybe we shouldn't."

"Don't you want to know if they actually have an infinite shelf life? It's all in the name of science. On the count of three, we eat them," Theo said, receiving a nod from the other boy. "One...two...three."

The two boys raised the snack cake to their mouths and took a bite. While Five had been correct and it was not as hard as a rock, it was indeed not a normal Twinkie-like texture. Instead, it almost felt like a sponge. A sponge that somehow tasted like nothing and dust at the exact same time—a sponge that quite literally seemed to disintegrate, unearthing an unpleasant aroma as they bit into it.

Both the boys quickly spit it out. They dropped the cake on the ground.

"Okay, so definitely a myth," Theo concluded.

Five gave him an unimpressed look. "You think?"

"If we get sick, then I take full responsibility," Theo said, grabbing the box of Twinkies and throwing it as far as he could.

"You better," Five replied. "Because I will hold it over your head for the rest of your life. You'll be trying to eat dinner, and I'll just randomly say, "Hey Theo, remember when you made me eat an expired Twinkie on my birthday and gave me food poisoning?" And you will sit there, knowing that the blame falls on you."

"I didn't make you eat it." Theo rolled his eyes. "You ate it out of your own free will."

Five groaned. "It's still your fault."

"Yeah, yeah," Theo replied. "Appy Birth. My second gift to you is not poisoning you."

"If you jinx me, I'll kill you before the Twinkie even has a chance," Five responded.

"Have fun talking to a department store mannequin then," Theo joked. "I heard she likes sequins."

— EMILIA'S NOTES

longest chapter so far!! i actually love them so much and this chapter. we really got to see their relationship progress. getting out of 2020 soon. :)

also, five finally called him theo, which if you recall was strictly close friends and family. 🥹

i just had to add a scene of them eating twinkies since five mentions how it's a myth that twinkies have an endless shelf life in season one. twinkies do in fact, begin to expire after about a month-45 days...

hope you enjoyed my loves <33