Riya was anxious since the time she announced that she would be giving up the custody of Pari. Her parents had obviously objected to her decision, and she was struggling to make them understand. She had strong reasons behind the decision. She had been struggling all these years to give Pari a picture-perfect life. Yes, it was indeed a miracle that she managed all these years. But recently, she had been facing challenges with her own body. It seemed like her mind and body were no longer following her commands. She felt tired most of the time, and on several occasions, she sensed the entire energy drained out of her. Most mornings she had to push herself out of bed when all she wanted to do was lie down and sleep. She was quite restless during the day. The only time she was happy was when she burdened herself with work. Her office work and learnings kept her occupied, and that became the main reason her sanity was still intact. However, whenever her mind triggered the old moments, she was left gasping for oxygen. She had been facing a lot of nosebleeds which immediately triggered after these incidents. Her blood pressure rose, exploding her head most of the time. 

She was left with an empty stomach as she couldn't feel the urge of hunger anymore. Many times, she was left overeating with junk food, especially chocolates, to control her mood swings. She felt highly scared when out of nowhere her emotions burst. Attending court dates was another torture for her. Each time she appeared before the courts, her helplessness increased. With Viaan in front of her eyes, his memories kept resonating in her mind. He had occupied a large part of her heart, and she was struggling to let it go. His accusations were a slap on her face and her soul. He had simply crushed her soul with his accusations. His cruel words had wrecked her heart completely. She was no longer the chirpy girl who was full of life once. Behind the scenes, Riya had also started distancing herself from her daughter and was closing off from everyone. This is when it struck her that something was not right.

Despite every struggle, she had to maintain a cool composure in front of her family, friends, colleagues, and most importantly, Pari. She had to maintain that perfect image of a strong mother who had a child to take care of. Each day was a new struggle for Riya. Keeping aside her own troubles, she had to stand up to fresh challenges on a regular basis. Pari was taking Occupational Therapy, Speech, Language, ABA, Special Education classes alongside attending an inclusive school with a shadow teacher accompanying her. All these therapies had burned a huge hole in Riya's pocket. It was a miracle and Wahe Guru's blessings that Riya was earning enough to fulfill Pari's medical needs; otherwise, spending eighty thousand to one lac per month is no easy task for any parent, especially without any husband's support.

Managing Pari's therapies, school, and other classes all together was no easy task. Each day, Riya had to note the pressure points and minutest details of Pari's behavior. Every single detail about Pari was important, and each day began with a new fight. Riya had to report these noted points for discussion with the therapists for their monthly achievements. Whether it was acceptance from school or society, regardless of the weather conditions, whether it was cold or hot, or it rained, all she had to manage was to make Pari available for the classes. Her schedule was watertight, leaving no scope for any leakage. Even her leisure time was devoted to Pari and her social needs. All Riya could think of was to give as much of a normalized atmosphere to her daughter as possible. She constantly monitored and carefully planned social activities and vacations for her. Communication with a child is the biggest roadblock faced by caretakers of autism. Pari used only a few words and sentences to express herself, and Riya had to analyze her behavior and actions to translate her needs into words. A mother knows all, as the saying goes. Riya would even understand her silence and showered her with all the love.

Until the age of 7 years, Pari had issues in her sleep pattern, which altogether disturbed Riya's entire sleep pattern. It was a miracle Riya had survived that phase. Those nights still haunt her, where Riya's body barely got 3 hours of sleep during the day. However, as they say, it's not an easy task to raise a special child in India. Societal acceptance is at the core of everything in India. There were incidents where she was left heartbroken when people didn't acknowledge her kid. Riya didn't lose hope and tried again. With her constant efforts, Pari was now moving towards normalcy. Now Pari would enjoy movies, play with other kids, play areas, and had started to show her interests. Riya had sighed with relief when her daughter started chewing food at the age of 7 years. She was really picky with food, and her constant constipations still gave goosebumps to Riya. Coconut water, camel milk, Mosambi Juice were Pari's essential saviors. Introducing new fruits, vegetables, Roti, and junk food had to be balanced. Moreover, her cute antics and demands filled Riya's heart with hope and love every time. She wanted to move mountains to make her girl smile. The biggest challenge she faced was acceptance from society. Anywhere they went, introducing any extracurricular activity, Riya had to step in to close the gap between the mentor and Pari, and many times coaches didn't entertain her. She had to pay more than twice the amount each time, and still, the coaches were not interested in mentoring an autistic child.

"Mumma Mumma Mumma," Pari repeated her name for the third time. She was anxious about why her mother was not responding to her. "Mumma Mumma," she called again with curious eyes.

Ah, her voice brought Riya out of her trance. She looked up and analyzed Pari's tense face, immediately realizing she was looking for input from Riya. Quickly changing her demeanor, she passed a loving smile to her daughter and made her sit on her lap. She placed a soft kiss on her forehead and cheeks. Ah, that was the sweetest thing she had ever tasted. Riya had never fallen so hard for anyone like she did for her own daughter. She could kiss her the whole day. The mere thought brought a genuine smile to her face. Pari was her biggest strength and biggest weakness at the same time.

"Mumma Mumma, suno baat," Pari again said. [Mumma, listen to me]

"Yes, Baby, tell me what's wrong, do you want anything?" Riya coaxed her.

"Mumma, Pari Super Mario Movie jana hai." She tried to explain in a few words. [I want to go to the Super Mario Movie]

Riya understood what her darling princess wanted. It was her day off, and Pari's classes had been completed for the day. She had seen the trailer on YouTube and was now very much interested in watching it on the big screen. Mario was Riya's favorite too, and she could use that time to forget all the hardships and challenges.

With a smile and relief on her face, she again inquired from her princess, "Hindi or English, which one would you prefer?"

And as usual, she got a response for "English." Pari had difficulty understanding Hindi movies. Her language was a mixture of both English and Hindi, and still, she had trouble creating long sentences in a single language altogether. Riya had verified the show timings and got ready for the movie. In the meanwhile, her mobile beeped, an unexpected SMS came. "We need to talk, let's meet any day you are free," he wrote in the message.

Riya saw the message but decided to respond later. However, her heart juggled with this decision. Did she want to meet him? In an instant, the answer came as a negative. The mere thought of communicating with him filled her heart with extreme toxic energy. She decided to type a message, "Why do you want to meet, care to explain?" She was about to apply the kajal when her phone beeped.

"You know the reason why; We need to talk," he replied.

"I have told your attorney the reason, what's more to discuss." Although this was the initial message she typed, her heart still skipped a beat whenever he was around. Her heart had never denied him of any want, and this time was no exception. She gave in to his demand. No matter how tough she was, when it came to Viaan, she crumbled. Another reason was she wanted him to know about the current turmoil she was facing. Although her mental peace was disturbed by her only tormentor, she still looked for comfort in him. Their relationship was one of the weirdest relationships. Viaan was her tormentor and her relief at the same time. Even Riya was amazed at herself that how she could love someone so passionately and accept nothing in return. She was selflessly, hopelessly devoted to him, and this love was really toxic. She knew it would bite her back in the ass later, but as the old quote says, "Love makes people blind, deaf, and an idiot." She had always craved for a picture-perfect relationship between Pari and Viaan. She had always desired them to be one, and even if she had to sacrifice herself in achieving that, she was still hell-bent on giving Pari her father back.

Riya and her father had always shared a perfect bond. Her father was always available for her. Riya still had memories of her childhood, teenage, and adulthood where her father stood for protecting her. She desired the same protection for Pari. One of the trigger points arose whenever Riya witnessed any child playing with their father. It always made her feel the emptiness that her child was missing. No one could replace a mother, however, the same is true for fathers as well. Viaan had the entire family's support with him, and no one would question a man with an autistic child, but the same didn't hold true for a female in Indian society. And Riya was tired, answering everyone, fighting a never-ending battle alone. She needed to get away from everyone. Her mind and body finally gave up. It may sound crazy to many, but Riya was incapable of loving anyone anymore. She was like a dead tree that was green from the outside, but its roots had succumbed to death already. Her soul was already dead, and she didn't want to burden anyone with the bitterness anymore. Her self-respect didn't allow her to bow down to that man again.

She had also contemplated that if Viaan was not willing to share a life with her, she would focus on giving Pari's custody to him so that they both could love each other. Even if she was not around, both of her favorite people could take care of each other.

Deleting her previous message, she typed, "Okay, let's meet next week any day after 5:30 pm. Let me know the time and place; I will be there."

Not expecting an immediate reply, her phone beeped again. "Thursday, 6 pm at Pizza Hut, Netaji Subhash Place."

"Pizza Hut," she almost cried. A lone tear fell from her eyes. He remembered how much she loved pizzas, and Pizza Hut was indeed one of her favorite places to go. She wiped the tear from her eyes, remembering a happy moment once again. She wrote, "Sounds cool, see you then," which received a hands-up emoji reply from Viaan.

Neither of them knew how things would turn around that day, yet these hearts kept waiting to meet the desired one. These two souls were longing for each other, still their karmic destiny had forced them apart. It was their Twin Flame journey, indeed one of the most difficult ones. Sleep was far away from their eyes, and both kept thinking about each other and their relationship. Hurt, pain, grief, ego, jealousy, anger – a mixed bag of emotions was felt on both sides. Somewhere in the background, a song played, indicating that two hearts were fighting with each other for each other: "Us Rab ne Jab dil diye dil ke do tukde kiye, dono per ek naam likha ek radha ek shyam likha. Ab ye dil dhadakte h milte aur bichhadte hai, Ek Duje ke Vaaste, Ek Duje ke Vaaste."

********************************** 4 days later **************************************

Riya was uncertain of her emotions that day. Her feelings had frozen long ago, yet she felt butterflies erupting in her stomach as she was meeting her husband after so long outside the courtroom drama. Fully aware of the present situations, her heart longed for emotions and desires that arose because of him. Not dwelling on the future too much, she decided to dress her best, look good, and feel as if she were going on a last date with her husband. Uncertain about how he would treat her, she still wanted to give her heart hope for the last time, as if the dead tree had grown a single green leaf that day.

To her dismay, the weather changed to cloudy, and it suddenly started pouring heavily from the clouds in the evening. Even the universe seemed to hint at the calamity of their meeting. Riya had once thought of canceling the plan but decided against it. Although concerned about parking her car, she messaged Viaan about the change in plans. "Meet me at Pacific Mall, Netaji Subhash Place instead of Pizza Hut. It's raining, and I won't get parking outside."

She wanted to dress her best that day. While shuffling the clothes in her wardrobe, the new pink ruffle skirt caught her eyes. She paired it up with a pink and white shirt. The nude eye shadow adorned her eyes along with black eyeliner and kajal. She matched her lips with the same nude pink color, and adding the final touch, a little blush on her cheeks glowed. Looking through the mirror, she admired herself and smiled. Last but not least, she decided to wear high heels for a change. Indeed, she looked drop-dead gorgeous and knew it could flatter his heart for once at least. This time she was hell-bent on walking away with her head held high and making him feel what he lost.

As she reached the parking lot, her phone beeped, "Reached, waiting at the 2nd floor." As she parked her car, her hands and toes turned sweaty. Nervousness was hitting her stomach, and she felt nauseous. With the inclining of the elevator, her heart started thumping hard. Her breathing was uneven, and a sigh escaped her lips when finally, she reached her destination. After stepping out from the elevator, she looked around for him.

There he was standing in full glory. A 6 feet tall man with broad shoulders, a beautiful face, and pink kissable lips. His spectacles made her eyes look large. For others, he might be an average-looking man, but for Riya, he was truly handsome. This man had made her heart flutter again. He had worn blue jeans and a black T-shirt. Viaan usually was a shirt man, and black had always looked awesomely delicious on him. This version of him was unknown to her. His long legs and hard-built chest were one to die for. She waved at him and smiled like a teenager. His face was void of any emotions, and he casually waved back. It hit Riya instantly that she gave away too much. And just like that, her face dropped. Facing the immediate rejection, she quickly realized her mistake: he was not her man anymore. He was not the same Viaan she once loved. As far as Riya knew, he had someone else in his life. And Riya was everything but not a homewrecker. She closed her eyes for a moment and calmed herself. She then corrected her composure, wiped the smile from her face, and walked towards him with her head held high. She had already embarrassed herself in front of him.

"Food court is downstairs; let's move there," he commanded. Not once could Riya feel any comfort in that voice. And like that, he started moving ahead, leaving Riya behind to follow him. Her heart crushed with his cold behavior once again, and she cursed herself for meeting him. Riya looked around and watched the couples around her walking together side by side, and here she was left alone to follow the man. It was basic courtesy that people usually follow. She felt unwanted, rejected, humiliated, and insulted at the same time. As she was trying to match his speed, high heels made it difficult. Fresh tears brewed in her eyes, and she was quick to wipe them. She was used to this rejection, and even after spending a decade with the man, nothing had changed. He was still the one to leave her alone. He didn't know how to treat a woman. He was a cruel man, and like that, she cursed. Riya was a gorgeous lady who never had trouble getting the attention of males around her. Her smile was infectious, and the opposite gender was very fond of her. She demanded her man to be a gentleman. This was something she had never ever faced in her entire life. 

The rejections that Viaan gave her crushed her heart always. She wanted to run back and never turn back to meet him ever again; however, her etiquettes disallowed this. At regular intervals, he stopped and looked behind to check if she was following him; however, he didn't walk beside her. She checked her watch and realized only 5 minutes had passed, and it felt like an eternity for her. She was suffocated in his presence and wanted to rush back home in the comfort of her daughter. Tears were clouding her eyes, and her legs shook. She no longer wanted to listen to him or communicate.

Finally, they reached the ground floor. "Will you take something?" he asked, breaking the silence. "No," she gave a firm, quick answer. After what happened in the past 5 minutes, she had composed herself, and her demeanor was now back to being emotionless. Her eyes were no longer admiring him, and like that, she closed herself once again. "OK, I will get a coffee for myself," he spoke. She simply nodded her head and waited for him to come back. She browsed through her Twitter account to kill some time.

Viaan, on the other hand, thoroughly enjoyed ignoring her and was observing her every reaction. It was his punishment. He had analyzed her from top to bottom, and his heart had definitely skipped a beat. He was a master at masking his emotions. She looked drop-dead gorgeous, and all he wanted was to make love to her senselessly. Her white legs were on display, and he definitely had the urge to punish her for showing off like that. He wanted to kiss her until she lost consciousness. He had the urge to kiss those beautiful eyelashes and hug her never to let her go. Before reaching there, he was skeptical about her reaction, but her one smile changed him, and he knew he could win this round again for sure.

He came back with a paper cup in his hands, took a seat opposite her, and said, "I'm feeling a bit under the weather, so I thought of taking tea." Riya looked into his eyes. He was looking for concern for him in her eyes, but Riya had also learned to mask her emotions. She no longer cared for him like she did before. His eyes always gave her hope to carry on, and she had fallen madly in love. Whether he was testing the waters or whatever, this small conversation broke some ice between them.

"That's what I thought initially, you were a cold drink person," she genuinely smiled. And he was again amazed at her honesty. She remembered every part of him, and it flattered his ego even more.

Not wanting to drag the conversation any longer, she started, "What's up? What do you want to talk about?"

Viaan straightened his pose and moved forward to keep his hands back on the table. He raised his eyebrows and spoke, "What's with giving the custody of Pari? I thought you loved her and want to keep her. I asked my counselor, and she suggested I not take custody as the child is autistic, and any changes in her regime can impact her negatively. How am I supposed to take care of the child when I'm unavailable during the day?" He was loud and clear.

Riya let out the breath she was holding and with determination, she started, "Look, Viaan, I took care of her. However, now circumstances are different. I want to move out of my parents' place. With your fake 354 and 354A case on my brother , I can't continue living with them. I'm unable to provide her with the protective environment she needs. That's why I sought out your help. You are her father. And when you left your wife, how come she is solely responsible for your child? As you need divorce so desperately, Let your counterpart also take some responsibility. Plus, I also want to move on in life. I can't be stuck in a loveless marriage for eternity." She announced loud and clear enough for him to listen.

"What the hell is 'move on' and 'my counterpart'? You have no right to question me. Did I question you about your life? How am I gonna manage her while I will be away at work? A hostel is out of the question for our child." He almost shouted. He was hell irritated and furious. How dare she bring up the word counterpart thrice in the conversation? And how could she mention she has to move on right in his face? He felt insulted. He observed her more, and a mere thought of someone else touching what was his fueled his anger more. He wanted to tie her hands and break her neck then and there. However, he couldn't afford a new case.

"The child is yours as well. When I had asked her to give the custody to me, then why did you refuse? What happened now? Are you running away again? At least complete your one responsibility fully. Except for your career, there are other things in life as well that require your attention." He accused and challenged. How could she dump everything on him and run away? Moving on my foot, he thought.

Riya heard him correctly. He again taunted her for not being a capable wife, and now he just taunted her for not being a good mother.

"She is your child as well, Viaan. And I'm not the only one entitled to take care of her. I'm doing my part, and I will continue to do so. I'm not running away. I will keep the visitation rights. I took care of her when you were with another woman; my job, for which you are taunting me right now, paid her medical bills when you left us on the road. When you are not answerable to me, do not expect any justifications from my side either. In all these 8 years, I have stood up, fought against everything alone, and please, the maintenance amount which you pry on paying me is just 1/4th of her actual expenses. I have been handling everything alone—love, her expenses, and even filling the shoes of both mother and father at the same time. You don't know how it feels to see other kids with their fathers. You made me feel worthless, Viaan. 

You made me feel like I'm a person whose child is not accepted by her own father. Another woman and her kid are enjoying the respect that was meant for Pari. Her kid is enjoying all the luxuries entitled to Pari. My daughter is entitled to everything you earn. She is your legal heir. And if you think I will give up on this, then you are absolutely mistaken. When Pari and I traveled in a rickshaw, that woman traveled in the luxury car which I paid you in dowry, wearing my damn jewelry with my own damn husband, living like a queen. And you are highly delusional if you think I'm going to behave like a worthless person in your life. I have my respect, and you are going to give me that. I'm not a person, and my child is not an orphan whom you can leave on the roads or treat like we are nothing. I want my life back, and I'm bloody going to get all the things back. If you want, you can give it easily, and if you want a fight, you are getting one for sure." 

And this time, she spoke the harsh truth with extreme rage in her eyes. She ripped the Band-Aid off, and it hurt like a punch in the gut.

"I cannot continue like this. I need love which you will never provide. I have my physical desires as well. I want to be selfish for once because here everyone is thinking about themselves, so why not me? To hell with your maintenance. You paid me, and it's lying safely in your daughter's account. I haven't used a single rupee yet, and I further don't require a single penny of yours. I need my peace back. I want to move on and live a happy life," she concluded with droplets of tears in her eyes.

Viaan was dumbstruck with her outburst. This was something new. She had never stood up for herself against his taunts. In the past, she had quietly accepted the taunts and humiliation he had thrown her way. It was a master manipulation technique to control someone. He had to quickly think to divert the situation in his favor; otherwise, he would be left with custody of the child, and she would move on with some other man. He was not at all ready to take the responsibility of Pari, as he knew he would not be able to manage everything. In his heart, he had huge respect for Riya for handling a child with special needs with a smile. He was not strong enough to handle all that alone. His sisters-in-law and mother together had made it clear that they could not take care of Pari. 

Surprisingly, Viaan had left his daughter and wife for them, and in the end, they turned out to be selfish. It was his biggest mistake to leave his wife for his so-called sisters-in-law; however, now he couldn't take his words back. His father would dispossess him of every ancestral property and right. He would lose his family, and for Riya, he couldn't afford to lose everything. He would again be a laughing stock and termed as "Joru ka Ghulam." He loved Riya to the core; however, societal image meant everything for him. If she didn't stand up for her so-called feminine rights, they would have been happy; he had married her, gave her the tag of his wife, what else did she require? He sometimes thought everything was not enough—the big house they stayed in, the big car she traveled, the expensive clothes and jewelry set she wore at parties. He was still unclear about the need for her to be financially independent when he was there to fulfill all her needs. He was still delusional that his wife should be satisfied with the tag of his wife only. What he entirely missed was she needed respect, love, care, and most importantly, to be treated like a human.

His best bet to take custody of Pari was Riya, who was now hell-bent on moving away. He was scared, very scared, with the fact that Riya would finally move on, leaving him and Pari behind. And that's when he thought if anger wouldn't work, emotions would.

"You won't know the pain of a parent visitation, Riya. You will fall apart in a single visitation. It hurts. I'm protecting you from the pain," he said, his eyes flickering with a pain of emotions that was readable by her.

Riya smiled. She was expecting this reply. She had been through the manipulation of Viaan and knew him to the core. When nothing worked, he always played the emotional card. This time was no different. She was well-prepared. She raised her eyebrows and focused her eyes on his.

"I know it will be tough, but I'm mentally prepared for it. As for how you are going to manage, the same applies to me as well. I was also managing all these years with the help of my parents. If legal terms expect me to contribute 50% to her maintenance, how come I'm responsible for 100% custody? How can a husband expect from a wife to share his burden when he is moving away from her life? And anyway, it's your parents' granddaughter as well; they should contribute when they expect their son to only focus on their joint family. Even my parents have been raising her for 9 years, and they have done their part as well. 

When you broke your marriage for another woman, please don't expect your wife to share your burden. That another woman has a share in your property, your salary, your love, your life. When I'm not even getting the acknowledgment of a partner anymore, why the hell should I contribute or invest in this relationship anymore? Sorry to burst your bubble; I'm resigning from the post of caretaker of your daughter and you with a three-month notice period starting today. But don't worry, I will be visiting my daughter every week and check her progress, and no court can stop me from providing her with love. If you don't want sole custody, then let's go for joint custody, as I'm not keeping her sole custody under any circumstances," she declared. The determination in her eyes was like fire, ready to burn him to ashes. She picked up her bag and, with her head held high, walked towards the parking lot.

As she opened her car, tears started rolling down from her eyes. She didn't want to give away the custody; Pari was deeply embedded in her soul. Riya was performing her part by providing Pari with the best medical treatment, amenities she could afford, and undying love. When Riya's diagnosis came up, she knew she had to safeguard Pari before moving towards her own treatment. If Riya won't be around, Viaan can take care of Pari, and the child will no longer have any issues. The main reason she proposed joint custody was that she was still unable to depart from Pari, however, was selfish to provide her with father's love as well. That little girl has wrapped Riya around her little finger, and Riya was not even complaining. Mothers cannot be selfish. Pari always came first for her.