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-- CARINA'S FLAT

Carina woke in her own bed sometime in the middle of the night. She felt her breath close up as she jerked awake from a restless sleep haunted by soulless corpses and a dark lake. It took her a few panicked breaths before she could calm herself enough to remember where she was. But as the full scope of what happened in the past day set in, she didn't know if reality was any better. 

Sirius had left earlier that night. Despite her offers to transfigure him a spare bed, he'd insisted he had a perfectly good one at his own flat. She'd nodded with understanding. Sirius was always loud and proud until he felt vulnerable. Then he tended to retreat into himself to process. It was part of the reason Carina always offered to fly with him when he was struggling with something- when they were in the air and on the broom, they could spend time together and enjoy the rush of the air without feeling obligated to talk. 

"I'll come around in the morning with breakfast," Carina told him as he was about to leave. 

Sirius looked ready to protest, but a stern glance from Carina shut him right up. They both realized the offer for what it was- not a chance to eat breakfast, but rather to check in on Sirius in a while. 

After the subdued wizard left for his own flat, Carina offered to share her bed with Lily. But the worried redhead was still too anxious to leave James. She'd given Carina a tired but grateful smile as Carina draped another blanket over her. The witch had curled herself up in the chair beside the couch.   

 When Carina crept out of her room in the darkness that had settled over her flat, she found that Lily was in the exact same position she'd left her. But James still seemed distressed, even in his sleep. As she pattered closer, she could see the sheen of sweat on his face and neck and the slight twitch of his eyes and jaw. Carefully placing her hand on his forehead, she grew increasingly worried when his skin was burning to the touch. Immediately coming back with a cold compress, she began dabbing away the beads of sweat with great care. James relaxed slightly under the refreshing coolness of the wet cloth. 

Carina froze as he started awake, his hand flying to her wrist like an iron vise. As he peeled his eyes open, she could only stare back as she waited for him to realize where they were and who she was and release her hand. While his initial caution faded as he recognized her, he did not release her. His eyes softened as they studied hers, and she could not make herself avert her gaze even if she tried. Despite the lack of verbal words, they were communicating with more honesty than they had all year. His hazel eyes held a touch of fondness, a healthy dash of inquiry, but mostly a reflective sense of nostalgia. While her own initially reflected her worry, she could also feel the sentimentality of everything that had brought them to this moment and the people they were today. Finally, they dropped all the masks and were honest about the state of their friendship and the reasons for it. And with that honesty came a nostalgic understanding for what had been, what might have been, and what would be. 

With the smallest sigh breaking the silence between them, James gave her hand a parting squeeze before finally releasing it. The fondness hadn't gone away, and the worry hadn't gone away. But what might have been was no longer what would be, and they both knew that instinctively. It was simply too late, and their paths had diverged.     

 "How long have I been out?" James whispered gruffly as he sat up. 

"A few hours. You're running a temperature." 

"I feel fine," he shrugged off. 

James froze as he saw Lily folded uncomfortably in the chair beside them. 

"She's been waiting for you since not long after you fell asleep... she was worried about you." 

James nodded thoughtfully. "Thank you for everything, Carina. I know it might've not been the best time to come to you, but I couldn't think of anyone else who would know what I might be feeling." 

"I'm glad you did," Carina responded firmly. "We're friends, first and foremost- we always have been. And this... pain from losing loved ones- especially so suddenly... it never completely stops hurting. But it will get much easier with time." 

"We should get out of your hair. Could you get the floo for us?"

The tall wizard rose to his feet, crouching in front of his wife. He gathered her close before smoothly lifting her out of the chair. Lily jostled awake, mumbling sleepily. 

"I've got you," James whispered reassuringly, resting his cheek against her hair. 

"Thank you," he told Carina gratefully before finally stepping into the green flames with his wife.  

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-- POTTERS' FLAT

Lily had been jostled awake when she felt herself being lifted. Her first instinct was to squirm away until she heard the comforting rumble of James's voice. Blearily, she blinked her eyes open just as he stepped into the familiar emerald flames of the floo. When they emerged in their own flat, she felt James sigh deeply. 

Her hand tightened on his shirt as she burrowed closer to him. 

"I didn't mean to wake you," he apologized softly. "Let me get you to bed." 

"It's alright... I wanted to be awake when you were." 

"I'm sorry I worried you," James frowned. "Carina told me you'd been waiting for me all evening." 

Their caring words were shadowed by the stilted awkwardness brought on by both their uncertainty. 

"I heard the news at the hospital. I just needed to make sure you'd be okay." 

James sat down on the sofa, keeping Lily wrapped up in his arms. He could feel the guilt in retrospect for having worried Lily, but he was grateful she didn't ask why he'd gone to Carina. He was fairly certain she hadn't told her girlfriends about how her parents were murdered and didn't want to go against her wishes again. 

"I'm... not okay," James sighed, leaning his head against Lily's. "But I am so grateful to have you with me during this." 

"You'll always have me," Lily whispered emotionally. 

"It feels so... lonely. Like the weight of the world that my parents had carried is now on me: the Potter family line, the estate, the responsibilities. I never thought I would have to take it over so soon. " 

"You won't ever have to do it alone," she said firmly, her green eyes shining with determination. 

"I'm so lucky to have you. And our friends." 

Lily suddenly ducked her head shyly, and James couldn't help but feel endeared. With their strong dynamics, shyness was rarely an emotion he was able to elicit from her. 

"We're not the only ones you have..." 

James tilted his head curiously. Had he missed someone? Did she mean her own parents? 

"What do you mean?" 

"Well..." Lily dodged his gaze repeatedly. "I don't think the Potter family line is going to be a source of worry for you anymore." 

James blinked blankly, staring at her for ten whole seconds of painful silence. His eyes widened suddenly as his pupils dilated, his gaze shooting immediately down to Lily's middle. 

"You-you're- we're-" 

Lily managed a trembling smile at his stuttering. "Yes. I'm pregnant. And we're going to have a baby. 

A mix between a laugh and a sob escaped James's throat as he clutched his wife closer with a desperate grip. He didn't think anything could permeate through the daunting feeling of sorrow he'd been feeling, but Lily proved him wrong. Part of him wanted to sob again because he realized his parents would never know their grandchild. But the bigger part of him was proud and ecstatic to be able to continue the legacy they'd left him. 

"How long have you know?"

"A few weeks..." Lily bit her lip in uncertainty. "I was just looking for the right time to tell you." 

 James's eyes softened on her, knowing their distance had weighed just as heavily on her as it had on him.

"You know I do love you, right?" James searched her eyes meaningfully. "I've loved you since I understood the meaning of the word." 

"I love you too, James Potter. I don't care how it came about, but I do love you with all my heart." 

Lily never could bring herself to ask about Carina. But she also didn't feel uneasy anymore because, at that moment, she could feel that her husband was fully with her. She'd meant it- no matter what brought them here, they were here now. She didn't need to know about the past because it would simply do her no good at this point. They were here now, and that's all she needed and wanted to know. 

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-- 2 MONTHS LATER 
     HEADQUARTERS OF THE ORDER

Carina was absolutely mortified.   

They rarely had whole Order meetings for safety reasons, but today had been one of those days where Dumbledore had summoned the entire cavalry. While Carina had been creating her strategies and arithmancy models from the pieces Moody had given her, Dumbledore had decided it would be good for her to see all the elements at play. 

Granted, they had other reasons for gathering. Dumbledore wanted to put headquarters under a Fidelius charm and thus had needed to gather everyone meant to be in on the secret. But frankly, seeing the breadth of their members left Carina in awe. Moody and the Prewetts had stood alongside nearly a dozen other uniformed aurors, including the Longbottoms and Sirius. The civilians among them were grouped in pairs of couples, friends, and even whole families who'd dedicated themselves to this cause. Among them were Ministry officials at all levels of government, including a few department heads. There were also a handful of healers and other professors or masters in their fields. Carina knew that despite the morality of their cause, only Dumbledore would be able to gather such an influential group of people into one room. 

Except perhaps Professor Slughorn, but his networks were on a completely different scale. 

Dumbledore had asked her to give everyone a brief rundown on the Order's general strategies and the different ways their members could get involved. She'd been nervous about presenting to so many people who were her senior in every measurable way, but Dumbledore had assured her she would be fine. It started off well enough, and everyone seemed to be entranced by the three-dimensional models she conjured to help them visualize the parties involved in this greater war. 

She was nearly done with her debrief when she glanced up. Gideon winked at her when she caught his gaze, and to her utter embarrassment, she absolutely froze. Moody glanced up and immediately noticed her red face, tracing her gaze back to his very own smirking deputy. 

"Alright, lover boy, enough of that," Moody barked roughly. 

Naturally, the rest of the Order looked up from her beautiful models to see who Moody was addressing. If they couldn't tell before what was going on already, they certainly could after Gideon opened his bloody mouth. 

He laughed easily. "Can you blame me? She's brilliant!" 

Carina turned as red as a tomato, which was really saying something because her tan skin tone normally did her the favor of hiding any blushes. Everyone in the room gaped at the pair standing across the room from each other in a mixture of surprise and amusement. Alice had the smuggest smile on her face while Lily could barely keep the grin off hers. Carina groaned internally when Peter threw her a thumbs up. Dear Merlin, her friends were never going to let her hear the end of this. 

Lucky for her, Dumbledore decided to take over soon after. Unluckily, he waited just long enough for the whispers of gossip to spread through the room like fiendfyre. Carina turned to Gideon with a half-glare that didn't have the intended effect because she was so flustered. He merely held her eyes as he quirked his lips in a small smile, a glimmer of challenge swimming in his hazel orbs.        

 After the official end of the meeting, Carina weaved her way over to the twins. 

"How could you interrupt my debrief?" She asked with an indignant huff. 

"I interrupted nothing, angel," Gideon smirked. "It's not my fault I leave you speechless." 

Carina grumbled in annoyance. 

"I never thought I'd see the day!" Fabian laughed unabashedly. "Though I might be Moody's definite favorite now."  

Carina rolled her eyes, spinning on her heel, ready to march away. She'd only made it a few steps away when just as quickly, she was pulled back like a yoyo. The pull on her arm made her stumble over her own feet, but she managed to steady herself... against Gideon's imposing torso. 

"About time you caught up," he whispered against the shell of her ear. "Because you leave me speechless every time I lay eyes on you." 

She could hear the amusement in his tone, but that did nothing to steady the quickening beat of her heart. 

"You're being ridiculous-" 

She lost her words yet again when her eyes clashed with his. And despite the lightness of his tone, his eyes burned with earnest intention.   

"That's twice today, angel," he murmured with satisfaction. 

"You're keeping count?" 

"Damn right, I am." 

"Alright, love birds. As happy as I am to see this, I need to borrow Carina." 

Carina slid away from Gideon quickly, turning around to see Alice watching them smugly. The past two months, Gideon had stayed true to his words in not pressuring her for an answer. But roguish as he was, he didn't waste a single chance to get a reaction from her whenever he saw her. At first, she found it easy to roll her eyes at it because the Prewetts had a history of teasing her off the ends of the earth. But as the weeks progressed, Fabian laid off a bit, leaving the path completely open to Gideon. At first, he kept count of the number of times he could make her laugh. Then when he realized he could make her blush, he kept count of that too. It appeared he would also be starting a count of how many times he left her speechless. 

"Of course!" Carina said a little too eagerly. 

"Hey!" Gideon argued playfully. "You work under me, Longbottom!" 

"Only while we're on duty," Alice threw back cheekily as she led her friend away. "You can have her back when we're done!" 

Alice guided Carina back to her friends, a small skip in her step the entire way. 

"Don't," Carina groaned. 

"I didn't say anything!" The petite witch said defensively. 

"You were thinking too loudly." 

Their friends from their year at Hogwarts were all gathered near the kitchen. Alice glided into Frank's open arms. Peter and Remus watched Carina with amused expressions. Lily was tucked against James, and Marlene and Sirius looked to be arguing.  

"You owe me five galleons!" She insisted to Sirius. 

He merely rolled his eyes, locking in on Carina. "You couldn't have waited a few more months before getting with one of them?" 

"Well, Alice still owes everyone five galleons," Lily pointed out. 

Alice grumbled but said it was better late than never. 

"What in the world is going on?" Carina raised her voice over the chatter of the group. "Why do you owe each other money?" 

"Well..." Peter began dramatically. "Alice bet everyone five galleons that you would be with one of the Prewetts last year. She lost it a few months back." 

"But no one really cared because we hadn't seen you with the Prewetts before by that point," Remus interjected. 

"But then we did see you together," Peter pointed out.

"At which point I bet Sirius," Marlene spoke up, "that you would get with one of them before the summer." 

"And I disagreed because I knew how stubborn you are!" Sirius cried. "You weren't supposed to give in until the winter!" 

"And I thought they were both wrong," Lily said. "My bet was that we'd see you together by autumn." 

Carina stared between her friends incredulously. "You bet money on whether I would date the Prewetts?" Carina's voice got higher and higher until she was practically speaking. She immediately quieted when she noticed others had stopped to stare at them, including the Prewetts. 

She immediately blushed yet again. "Well, you're all wrong. We're not together." 

"I just have to know!" Peter butted in. "Is it Gideon or Fabian or both?" 

"Neither!" Carina blushed. "I told you I'm not with them." 

"You seemed pretty comfortable in Gideon's arms when I went to get you," Alice smirked. 

"Oh dear Merlin," Carina rolled her eyes back. "Can we please stop talking about this? There is nothing to talk about!" 

Despite her quiet snickers, Alice drew the group's attention away from Carina. But not before she saw Sirius turn to Marlene and say that she owed him five galleons. 

"We actually wanted to tell you all something!" Alice said excitedly, clapping her hands together. 

Frank and Alice shared a look before they both spoke together. "We're having a baby!" 

"What?" 

"Good job, mate!" 

"Congratulations!" 

"I feel so old..." 

The chorus of reactions rang around the group as everyone offered the couple heartfelt congratulations. 

"We thought about it a lot," Alice quieted them all down. "And it was so hard to decide because you all mean so much to us. But we're planning for more than one child, so..." 

"We'd like James and Lily to be this one's godparents," Frank finished for her. 

Lily gasped. "Oh my god! Of course, we will!" 

"Actually," James interjected bashfully. "Now's probably a good a time as any to tell you all, but we're also expecting." 

Alice stared at Lily with wide eyes before she let out a loud squeal, jumping up and pulling Lily into a fierce hug. 

"And we know exactly who we want as godparents as well," Lily said nervously, glancing at James. 

"Sirius," James announced. Sirius's eyes widened in surprise before he pulled his best mate into a crushing hug. 

"And Carina," Lily said, with a slight question in her voice. 

Carina could feel her heart melt as she walked over to the hopeful witch. "I'd be honored."  

The entire group was abuzz with joy and hope. Though they were nearly two years out of Hogwarts, this was one of the first bigger milestones among them. The first had been the weddings. Moments like this reminded Carina that there was daybreak beyond the shrouding cover of this war.  

"Our children are going to be best friends," Alice declared.  

"Absolutely!" Lily agreed. 

"A little prongslette," Remus chuckled excitedly. 

When everyone was huddled around the two expecting mothers, Sirius broke from the group. He came around to Carina, gesturing outside subtly. 

"Walk with me?" 

Carina raised an eyebrow curiously, and with a nod, followed his lead. 

"Everything okay?" She finally asked when they were outside. 

"I was actually about to ask you the same thing." 

"I'm fine," Carina said uncertainly. "Other than... you know, ALL OF YOU BETTING ON MY LIFE!" 

Sirius winced, though he still smiled. "It was easy money," he shrugged. "Notice how no one bet you wouldn't get with one of the Prewetts?" 

"Too bad," Carina grumbled. "They would've won." 

"It's not that," Sirius redirected her. "I meant with being a godmother and everything. To James and Lily's child..." 

Carina smiled weakly. She understood his concern, but she was honestly at a point where she just wanted to move past it. "They are some of my closest friends. I'm honestly thrilled they asked me." 

Sirius nodded, reassured by her words. "I thought as much. I just wanted to make sure. You seem happier these past few weeks." 

"Yeah," Carina agreed. "You seem like you're doing better too." 

Sirius sighed with a smile tinged with hints of sadness. As rough as the past two months were on James, they were surprisingly even worse on Sirius. After the Potters' funeral, James seemed to pull himself back together day by day, whereas Sirius seemed to keep falling apart. In retrospect, Lily's company and news of their baby had probably helped James keep moving forward. But Sirius had been stuck in a deep ditch for a while. 

Carina knew how unanchored he felt, and she felt even worse knowing what she did about Regulus and not being able to tell him. If there was any time to remind Sirius about his remaining family, now would've been it. But Moody and the others still wanted to hold onto that card for longer, especially now that Regulus was out of Hogwarts and back home. Too many people knowing about his true allegiances could make the difference between life or death for him. But that didn't stop her guilt every time she saw Sirius struggling. 

"I am doing better," he agreed. "Marlene helped... a lot." 

"I'm glad you had her." 

"I think I'm going to propose soon." 

Carina's eyes widened in surprise. That was certainly news! Another milestone for the books. 

"That's amazing!" She said breathlessly. "You two are good together." 

"Would you help me with ring shopping?" Sirius asked nervously. "I would normally get her a Black family ring, but I don't have access to the vaults anymore since... you know. But I want to get her something special." 

"Of course I will! Mar is a witch who deserves a big rock." 

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