-- 1 MONTH BEFORE GRADUATION 

Life was getting easier and easier for Carina. At least by her standards. While McGonagall recommended she drop her potions projects, she was determined to see them through the end for her own sake. If she gave up now, she was basically admitted she would never go back to potions. Her personal life progressed without any major hiccups as well. Lily would come around the seventh year girls' dorms and talk to Alice and Carina about plans for after graduation. James was an occasional topic of conversation, but Alice tried to limit it for Carina's sake. Even still, it got easier and easier with every passing day. 

Her peace wasn't disrupted until one unfortunate day when she'd lost track of time and left the potions lab later than she usually would. By then, the halls of the dungeons were abandoned as most people were at dinner. 

She should have known he'd seek her out again. But for some reason, she hadn't bothered to give him much thought the past few months. 

She'd barely left the potions lab when she saw a flash of brilliant platinum hair. She had little time to process before the tall figure had her pushed up against the cold stone wall of the corridor. 

"What do you want, Lucius?" She asked tiredly. 

His hands rested on the wall behind her on either side of her shoulders, making an escape improbable. He stared down at her, his expression severe and contemplative. 

"They've set a date," he told her stiffly. "For my wedding." 

Carina inhaled deeply. "Congratulations," she told him tonelessly. 

Lucius' probing eyes dimmed- possibly in disappointment? "That's it?" 

Carina shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you. I hope you'll be happy- I'm sure Narcissa is lovely." 

"She's a cold, unfeeling bitch." Lucius bit out. 

"The same could be said of you," she retorted hotly.  

Lucius sneered in defense, stepping even closer until he was a mere hairbreadth away from her. She stared up at him resolutely, not willing to let him intimidate her. "Well I guess I can't complain. At least I'll be married. Where will you be a year from now? Still, pining after your friend's boyfriend? Really, Carina, it's a bit pathetic of you."         

Carina's spine stiffened immediately, and she brought up her arms to shove him back roughly. 

"I don't see how it's any of your damn business, Malfoy," she yelled. "We don't have any connection anymore." 

Lucius seemed to realize the callousness of his own words as he stepped back willingly, not retaliating again. Instead, his voice dropped to a whisper she could barely hear. "By your choice, not mine." 

Carina sighed, taking in the man before her. Sometimes he still reminded her of the boy she dated. Sometimes. 

"Lucius, you're not the same man you were when I was with you. You've changed. I've changed! We've chosen our paths long ago. Tell me I'm wrong." 

She could see him struggle with himself, but even he was unable to say otherwise. He certainly wouldn't bring dishonor to the Malfoy name by turning blood traitor. And as much as he tried to convince her to join them for her own protection, he knew compromising her morals in such a way would only make the Carina he loved wither and die. 

Lucius didn't know why he kept seeking her out. He knew she'd never give in, not under his terms. And every time they did talk, the disagreement would lead to frustration and then to anger. The conversation would always turn ugly. He always walked away with another disappointing memory that kept shadowing the year of genuine joy he'd experienced with this witch.  

Yet, he couldn't stay away- like a moth drawn to a flame. Carina was all warmth, and he wanted a piece of that. Until, he got too close and realized the burning conviction of her goodness. There was no way for him to survive near her. Like a moth to a flame. 

"MALFOY!" A hard voice called from the end of the hall. 

Carina and Lucius snapped their heads towards the newcomer. Sirius and Remus came towards them with quick, purposeful strides. Carina couldn't guess how they always seemed to find her when she was in a bind. She didn't know Sirius had taken to carrying the Marauder's Map with him the past few weeks, afraid Carina would try to hide away from them again if things got too overwhelming. The others didn't even notice as they had little use for it these days- they were all too occupied with the here and now.   

"Didn't we tell you to stay away from Carina?" Sirius bit out in a furious tone, his voice cold enough to match the Scottish winters. 

"Sirius, it's okay," Carina insisted gently. "We're already done here," she told Malfoy meaningfully. In an unprecedented move, Malfoy stayed stonily silent, not bothering to respond with his usual vitriol.   

She pushed past her friends, heading upstairs. Remus and Sirius lingered to give Malfoy one last severe glare before turning to flank Carina back up to the main hall. 

"What happened?" Remus asked her gently, no judgment in his voice. 

"Nothing," she said. "We just talked." 

Sirius scoffed. "I wouldn't trust that bastard to breathe, much less talk." 

"He told me he's marrying your cousin, Sirius," she brought up. "Narcissa." 

Sirius raised an eyebrow in surprise. "I haven't heard from my family all year- it's news to me. Can't say I'm surprised. Of course, they would covet the bloody Malfoys. You should stay away from him, Carina!" 

She stopped, whirling to the boys angrily. "Look, he came to me- not the other way around. I can't control it if he corners me in the hall." 

"I knew it," Sirius growled, turning back to the dungeons. 

Carina jerked him back with a roll of her eyes. "Leave it. We just talked. There's literally nothing to get worked up about. He might be a right bastard when he's with other Slytherins, but with me he's all bark and no bite." 

"James is going to be pissed," Sirius told her. 

"James is not going to find out," she insisted sternly, staring at the boys sharply. 

"But-" 

"No, Sirius! I don't want him ambushing me with all his useless protective concerns only to turn around and get reabsorbed in Lily." 

Sirius winced. "Sorry, I didn't mean-" 

"I know you didn't! And it really isn't a problem, I'm glad they're happy. But he hasn't really talked to me personally since I completed my favor. I only see him when I'm with you lot. That's how it was before he asked me to be his fake girlfriend- it's only normal we return to that. I don't need you all trying to jerk his attention back to me- I don't WANT it." 

She still felt a deep ache when she thought too much about how easily James seemed to return to their previous friendship. She hoped that their plan would have at least made them closer friends- Merlin knew they went through a lot together in that short time. But like she'd feared, James Potter didn't really need her for anything. Not like the other marauders.   

Sirius sighed, nodding reluctantly. 

"Remus?" She turned to him sharply. 

He raised his hands wryly in surrender. "I'm sure you can handle Malfoy on your own. You don't need to worry about me saying anything." 

"Good." 

She turned, leading them the rest of the way to the Great Hall. James perked up upon their entrance. Things seemed a bit stiff between the trio when they sat down, and James quirked an eyebrow towards Remus and Sirius questioningly. But they merely shook their head dismissively. 

Hmm. Since when did they have secrets from him? Even the most inconsequential bits of information were shared between the marauders. 

Until now.  

«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ・☽ ༓ ☾・  ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶  ̶̶̶̶        

"Let's go for a dip in the lake!" Sirius suggested with a gleam in his eyes. 

"Are you mad?" Carina asked. 

"Why not? It'll be fun! Live a little!" 

"You know, except for the fact that it's nearly midnight." Remus pointed out. 

"Details!" Sirius rolled his eyes. "Come ON! James?" 

Their whole friend group was gathered by the fireplace, and the seventh years were the last remaining people in the Gryffindor common room. They'd just finished their NEWTs this week and were finally free, whereas the rest of the school was still scrambling for their end-of-year exams and OWLs.  

"I'm always up for a good adventure," he simply said with a playful smile. 

Unlike a few months ago, he was no longer off the walls trying to convince the others along with Sirius. He was much calmer and settled- perhaps an effect of Lily's influence. 

"Guys?" Sirius asked the rest of them. 

"I'm always up for anything," Peter shrugged, Remus nodding along. 

"Let's do it!" Alice told Carina and Frank excitedly. "When else would we get the chance? We already have our NEWTs!" 

Carina and Frank shrugged. It didn't seem like a terrible idea on this warm night.

"YES!" Sirius pumped his fist into the air. 

"NO! Absolutely not!" Lily cried. 

"Come on, love," James said with a good-natured grin. "It'll be fun." 

"Except that it's past curfew! And we're the Heads!" 

"So they'll be more lenient if we get caught, exactly!" Sirius emphasized. 

The rest of the group sniggered when Lily turned red, bristling at the hotheaded wizard.  

"Come on, Lil," Carina said. "It'll be a memory for the books." 

"No." Lily insisted sternly. 

"Lily," James said gently, drawing her away from the group. He spoke quietly to her with a small smile on his face. The tension in Lily seemed to melt, and he led her back to their friends. 

"Let's go!" James grinned. 

"REALLY?" Alice cried excitedly, looking to Lily in surprise. 

"All right! You've convinced me!" She finally gave in with a hint of a smile. 

They couldn't all fit under James's invisibility cloak, so Sirius discretely checked the Marauder's Map for a clear path as they made their way through the abandoned halls under disillusionment charms. Sirius was the first one to run into the lake, stripping off his layers along the way, only in his boxers when he jumped into the cool water with an enthusiastic whoop. 

Remus rolled his eyes, taking the time to transfigure his underclothes into swimming wear before following his friend in. Alice pulled her two girlfriends behind the shelter of the large willow. 

"You boys go ahead! We'll be right in!" 

"You're not planning on doing something evil like stealing their clothes and leaving them out here, are you?" Carina asked as Alice pulled Lily and her away from the boys. 

Alice froze. "That's brilliant! But no- I actually do want to stay and swim tonight."   

"What are we doing?" Lily asked. 

"Making sure we look good in front of our boys, of course!" Alice told her, already stripping off her clothes before transfiguring her underclothes into a strappy plum one-piece that may as well be a two-piece. 

Carina laughed. She always loved how straightforward Alice was. Getting to work on her own clothes, she transfigured herself a white and deep navy swimsuit with a cut-out between her ribs and the high-waisted bottoms and a bare mid-back. 

"Now that's what I call style," Alice told her approvingly. 

They turned to Lily, who'd fashioned herself a plain but beautifully green suit. 

"No, that won't do!" Alice hummed, going to work on it even as Lily protested. When she stepped away from the tall redhead, the full front of her suit was now separated into high-waisted bottoms and top cinched at the center of her chest, the sweetheart neckline emphasizing her curves and leaving her rips bare. 

"Ooh nice wand work!" Carina cooed over the pretty changes. 

They stepped towards the water, and the boys turned their heads, their jaws dropping in surprise. James' lips curved into a smile as he took in Lily, and she responded with a small smile with growing confidence. Alice joined her boyfriend in the water, tapping Frank's chin closed with amusement. 

It wasn't long before they were splashing each other, enjoying the cool water. Alice drew Lily further into the water, despite Lily's concerns that they'd get pulled under by the Giant Squid. 

"The squid is friendly," Sirius told them as he, Remus, and Peter went after the girls and Frank. "I swear!" 

Carina treaded water closer to the shore, taking the chance to float on her back and stargaze like she loved doing. 

"Enjoying yourself?" She heard a muffled voice ask her. Carina opened her eyes, raising her head out of the water. 

"James," she said in surprise. She'd have expected him to go after Lily. 

"How've you been?" He asked with a warm smile. "I feel like we've barely seen each other!" 

"I know," Carina agreed regretfully. "End-of-the-year chaos, you know? We've both been busy."

"I know," he apologized. "There's just so many damn ceremonies for the graduating class that needs preparing!" 

"And Lily," Carina pointed out with a small teasing smile. 

"And Lily," he admitted, watching her hesitantly. 

He didn't know how to address Lily with Carina anymore. That day he happened upon them at the lake, it seemed like they were still close friends. But it didn't escape his notice that Carina never actually answered Lily's question about what went down between them while they were fake dating. 

It took him a lot of thinking before he could truly be honest with himself. Despite his intentions of getting Lily back, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't felt anything for Carina while they were together. The witch was remarkable! They shared a spark of potential, or at least he thought they did. But he'd long come to accept that Carina only saw the whole thing as a favor to her good friend. She was just selfless like that. He'd almost believed she might've returned his feelings. But the only time they shared a truly intimate moment was that kiss, and Carina already admitted that was fueled by her encounter with Malfoy. 

He wondered for a week if he'd made the right choice. Was he being disloyal to his own feelings by being with Lily? The doubts had caused him to distance himself from his new girlfriend for a week. The first day he feigned excuses to keep away from Lily, she was confused. By the second day, the hurt set it in. She'd confronted him, and he couldn't offer any excuses. By the third day, Lily's determination took hold- something James hadn't anticipated. For the rest of the week, she sought him out wherever he tried to hide away with his own thoughts. She made him laugh, and she forced him to stop hiding. It was Lily's efforts that eventually melted away the remaining bits of James's inhibitions. 

He'd been scared Lily only finally decided to be with him out of jealousy or habit. He'd told Carina himself he didn't want to be with someone who wouldn't fight for him. But when the hour came, Lily fought. She fought despite the emotionless responses he gave her and the lack of encouragement. He was flooded with all the reminders of why he'd fallen in love with the witch in the first place. 

Ever since then, he'd made peace with how everything turned out. 

Carina's voice brought him back to the lake. "You're good for her, you know?" 

"I am?" He asked distractedly. 

"You draw her out the perfect little shell she tries to wrap herself in," Carina told him. "She wouldn't have come with us tonight if it weren't for you."   

"Hmm..." James agreed belatedly. "She's really good for me too," he said softly. 

"I see that," she said. 

"You do?" His eyes flew to hers, and she responded with a small smile. 

"You're calmer than you use to be- more settled. It's still you in there- jokes and all. But less of a showboat," she teased. 

James burst out laughing. "Finally stopped being a showboat, did I?" He said indignantly, splashing her with water. 

Carina sputtered as she got a mouthful of water. She splashed him back until they caught the others' attention. 

"Water fight!" Sirius yelled, bringing the others over until they were all fighting, every man for themselves. 

The peals of their laughter faded into the night, marking one of the last moments of untinted and unburdened joy the group would experience together.       

«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ・☽ ༓ ☾・  ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶  ̶̶̶̶

-- 2 WEEKS BEFORE GRADUATION 

"Dumbledore just asked us," James told the group in a hushed voice. "Of course, we all agreed. We were planning on being involved anyway." 

"I thought you were trying out to chase for the Falcons?" Lily asked James, her brows scrunching in concern. 

"I'm still going to," James told her. "It'll be a good cover too. No one would suspect a pureblood Quidditch player of being part of the Order." 

"What about you three?" Alice asked Sirius, Remus, and Peter. 

"I've taken a position at the Ministry-" Peter said. "In the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes." 

"I'm not sure yet," Remus grimaced. Carina felt her heart go out to him; she knew how anxious he was about his employment. "Hopefully I can work more actively with the Order." 

"I've been accepted to the Auror Corps," Sirius announced with a sheepish grin. 

"Wait what?" Carina asked suddenly. "You got in? When did you find out?" 

"Just last night," he grinned. "The owl came to my room." 

Carina was out of her seat, gathering Sirius into a proud hug before he'd even had the chance to stand. "Congratulations! I'm so proud of you!!"    

"I told you we'd work together after graduation," he chuckled, turning his head to the witch who clung to his back like a monkey. 

"What?" James raised an eyebrow. "Work together? Are you joining the Aurors too, Carina?" 

"No!" Carina laughed at the mere thought. 

"Dumbledore recruited her to work with the Aurors in the Order as a strategist." Remus filled him in. 

"Since when?" Lily asked, looking at her friend in surprise. 

"A few months ago," she said sheepishly. 

"You all knew already?" James asked them. 

Alice, Sirius, Peter, and Remus looked at each other hesitantly before nodding. 

"I didn't exactly announce it," Carina told them apologetically. "It just came up as we talked about our futures." 

"What about potions?" James asked Carina in concern. 

Lily smiled. She was surprised James remembered Carina's passion for the subject. Once again, he proved how tentative he could be. 

Carina shrugged helplessly. "I suppose it has to wait." 

"Dumbledore said she'd be working directly with Moody," Alice whispered. "He really wanted her for this position. He wouldn't even let her chose potions instead!" 

"It's not like that!" Carina insisted humbly. "I'm sure I could've chosen potions if I really wanted. But he needs this position filled, and apparently he thinks I'm qualified for it." 

"Qualified for it?" Sirius snorted. "Carina, he told you you're one of the most talented arithmancy students in a century!"

Carina blushed while James and Lily absorbed all the new information in wonderment. How could they not have known? They glanced at each other, communicating silently. They had been rather preoccupied with each other in the last two months.    

"Hey!" Alice announced in excitement. "Maybe this is what Dumbledore wants to speak to us about, Lil! He asked us to his office at the end of the week, remember?" 

"Right," Lily agreed, refocusing. "It really is the end of an era," she smiled nostalgically. 

James smiled, but it felt a bit forced. His mind was still on the new developments. Since when they did not tell each other everything? Maybe he was just being sensitive; he wouldn't have overthought not knowing about Carina's career choices right away if this had happened at the beginning of the year. That was what he liked most about Carina- their friendship was never forced or burdensome. She was always around, and they always talked openly. But the periods in which they got caught up with their individual lives never made him feel as though the closeness between them dissipated. Yet for some reason, this time around he felt more distant from all of them than ever before.    

"Maybe," Peter admitted. "But at least we're starting the next one together."   

«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶«̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ・☽ ༓ ☾・  ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶ ̶̶̶ ̶»̶ ̶̶̶ ̶ ̶  ̶̶̶̶

Do not fear- I've outlined more of this story and what's been published up until now is only approximately 25% of the whole story! LOTS of content ahead, so don't get disheartened and leave me 🖤

~ADHARYN