C H A P T E R   T E N
friends

dude:
a surfer who is often a friend.

Dawson and I stayed on the beach for quite some time until the wind started to pick up and the sun was beginning to set.

He kept his arm draped atop of my shoulders as we walked back to his truck, a stark contrast to how we first arrived here just hours ago.

As we arrived back at the truck he opened up the door for me, his hand moving down to my lower back as I use the running board to get inside.

I couldn't help the fluttering in my chest as wherever he touched left my skin scorched, heat radiating from his hands through my body.

He hoped into the drivers seat beside me and placed the keys into the ignition before turning to face me. His eyes met mine as he sat there taking in my appearance.

"I look like a mess don't I?" I question. I probably had mascara staining my cheeks and my eyes all red and puffy from the amount of crying i've just done.

"The opposite actually." he replies as my cheeks flame red, as I shift my glance down to my lap to avoid his looks.

His laughter fills the air as the engine roars to life before we start making our way back down the gravel road.

The drive back to the parking lot of the Surf Shack seemed a lot faster than when we made the drive earlier. It probably was due to the fact that there was no awkward silence, instead the truck was filled with random chatter about anything and everything.

As he pulled into the parking lot the only vehicle that remained between the lines was my Jeep. He stopped his truck beside it as I undid my seatbelt.

"So tomorrow, I was thinking i'll come pick you up at around ten if that works for you?" he says as I open the door and make my way out of the truck.

"Ten sounds good to me." I reply as I brush a strand of hair out of my face that was blown by the wind. "Thank you for everything today Daws, it means more to me than you know."

With a smile I close the door and make my way into my Jeep. Dawson backs out and gives me a wave before driving off down the streets.

I turn my vehicle on and grab my phone from my purse before dialling Miranda.

"You have a lot of explaining to do!" she says answering the phone after the first ring. "Where have you been? I haven't seen, or really heard from you since the party."

"I'll explain everything, i'm coming to pick you up now. Be ready in ten" I reply before hanging up the phone as soon as I heard her start rambling on the other end of the line.

Miranda's house wasn't very far away, only a couple of blocks so it didn't take long to get there at all.

Instead of driving around the town, she led me inside and up into her room where I was now sprawled out on top of her bed spilling the events of the last little while.

"So hold on, you, Ainsley Matthews are going to surf again?" she asks completely and utterly shocked as she spins on her computer chair.

"I know i'm just as shocked about it as you are." I reply throwing my head back against her pillows. "Something just made me want to try again, i've been wanting to for a while but now but I have been scared to head out there."

"Are you sure it wasn't someone who made you want to try again?"

I turn to her shocked. "What do you mean by that?"

"Oh Ains you know exactly what I mean. I've heard from Jessa that you seem different lately, almost happier." she starts off looking at me with a smile. "It's like the old Ainsley is back and we love that. And not to mention surfing, you haven't once brought up wanting to ride a wave since you know..." she trails off afraid to bring up her name.

"I know I haven't brought it up but quite honestly it's been on my mind for quite some time now but I never knew how to go about it."

"Ever since this guy, Derek?-"

"Dawson" I correct her quickly, hoping she didn't notice the blush that made it's way onto my cheeks at the mention of his name.

"- Dawson came around, he's brought out the old you. It's a good thing Ainsley."

I smile as I sit up on her bed, turning to face her as she looks more serious now. A look of concern on her face as she looked over me.

"I just want to make sure that you are ready for this because I know how tough it's going to be for you. It was tough on all of us after what happened but you it affected the most. I just don't want to lose you again." she says wiping at her eyes quickly in an attempt to hide her tears.

"Mir.. you won't lose me again. What happened destroyed me, but i've taken the time i've needed to be able to do this again. I feel like i'm still missing a part of my life from before the accident and I had thought that was just from losing Crystal. But now I realize it was because I lost surfing too." I say making my way over to her as I pull her into a hug.

"You know Jessa and I will be there to support you every step of the way"

"I didn't doubt that for a second." I reply. "You guys have always been there for me."

A smile is on her face as she gets out of our embrace when a ding radiates out of the speaker of my phone.

"Is that you know who?" she explains before jumping onto the bed to grab my phone before I even had a chance to process what was happening. "Oh my god it is him!"

I snatch the phone out of her hands as I see a message from Dawson on the home screen.

I just wanted to check in and make sure you are doing alright, I know it was a tough thing for you to open up about, but thank you for doing so Ains. -D

Also, if tomorrow is too soon we can postpone for a little while. -D

"You told him about what happened?" Miranda asks completely shocked after reading the messages. "You hardly tell anyone about what happened."

"It just kind of happened. I wasn't planning on telling him in the slightest but he took me out to this beach which was his secret spot and I just kind of ended up spilling everything."

Miranda could barely comprehend what I was saying. She just kept sitting there looking like a fish, opening and closing her mouth until finally she regained control.

"I can't believe that. He's clearly someone special if you opened up to him within a few weeks of knowing each other. You hardly ever tell anyone what really happened."

"I just trusted him with it that's all. It is not like he's someone special, just someone who was willing to help." I reply, however what I said wasn't entirely true.

I knew I was starting to feel something for Dawson, and that feeling terrifies me. The fact that I told him what had happened, the fact he's going to help me surf again, I knew he was someone special.

"Ainsley that's bullshit, both you and I know it. I've known you for so long i'm able to tell when you're lying, and that look on your face right now tells me you are."

I sigh running a hand through my hair. "I don't know Mir, I feel like he's just going to be like all the other guys."

"Exactly. You feel like he is, you don't know that he is. You can't go through life worrying that everyone is gonna be like the last, or that everyone is going to leave you like Ashton did."

Hearing his name made my heart clench. Ashton. My ex boyfriend of three years who left me after what happened with Crystal.

He promised that he would be there with me through everything but all that changed when he saw how much of a mess I became. He told me he couldn't deal with it all, that he loved me but didn't love me enough to help me through the darkest point in my life.

He moved away. Packed everything up and transferred colleges according to what everyone said. He never told me the reason as to why I left, or where he went to, but one day I just woke up and he was gone. He had just cut me out of his life completely.

"I realize that. It's just i'm not looking for anything anyways. He's a friend and that's all he will be." I state.

"Mhmm whatever you say Ainsley." she says rolling her eyes. "Just don't close yourself off to the possibility of it being more."

"No guarantees on that. Besides after all that I told him about I doubt he'd want to get involved with me anyways. I'm damaged goods and that's all anyone ever sees me as."

"That is not true in the slightest bit. Do you realize how many guys have looked past that, have tried to be with you but you've shut them out?" she replies shaking her head as she throws herself back against her pillow. "Clearly he doesn't think you're damaged goods if he's willing to help you get back out there after you told him what happened, nobody has done that before."

As much as I hated to admit it, she was right. Usually when I tell everyone they slowly start distancing themselves from me, but Dawson was different.

He stayed. He comforted me. He listened to what I had to say, and more importantly he was willing to help me again.

He was different, and different scared me because he was the type of different I need in my life.

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