"Flame Brain!" Gray called.

"Natsu!!!" Lucy screamed for the hundredth time.

The others were calling, but only two voices really mattered to me. Lucy's and Gray's. Lucy to remind me of what I did to her, Gray to remind me that I still didn't have control. I dropped down behind the party.

"Who's Natsu?" I asked.

"You, now come. We are going back to the guild to celebrate your return!" Erza commanded.

I cocked my head to the side, kind of like a dog would.

"I know of the salamander named Natsu, but he disappeared three years ago, no?" I asked.

"Yes, you disappeared three years ago, let's go!" Lucy said desperately.

"Funny, I've been training in the Frozen Wastes for nearly ten years. I'm turning twenty tomorrow." I lied.

I hated doing this, but it was the only way to really show them that the Natsu they knew and loved was gone.

"If your so sure your not Natsu, then take off the helmet" Lucy gasped, she was on the verge of crying.

I took off my helmet, the orange hair I had earned a stark contrast to the red in my armor. My eyes were still onyx, but eye color is easily explainable, as good genetics.

Lucy flat out broke, she just fell to the ground crying. It. Took. All. Of. My. Control. Not. To. Help. Her. Back. Up.

Leo appeared, and helped her up, glaring at me all the while. I just stood still, looking impassive. In reality, my heart was in pieces. Good, step on those pieces and make them smaller, make them harder to heal. Kill all emotion, nothing can be left. I can not let END take over again. My eyes went dead. I put my helmet on.

"As you can see, I'm not Natsu. Now then, shall we?" I asked, getting into a fighting stance.

"I don't believe your bullshit for a second, salamander." I heard Gajeel growl, then he tried to blindside me.

"You are Natsu, stop denying it!" Laxus roared at me, then charged me.

I dodged then both with such ease it was like I slowed down time. Lucy had hope in her eyes once more. My heart shattered into a million more pieces. I couldn't do this, hurting Lucy again. I was now in front of her, my helmet was slowly deforming. There was sadness in my eyes this time, and Lucy realized it as soon as I did. Before I could do anything, she had already smashed her lips to mine. My damn body betrayed me and pulled Lucy into a hug. Damnit, this is the opposite of what I'm supposed to do! I couldn't stop myself, I should be hurting myself, for what I did to her, not rewarding myself with Lucy. Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit. Then my body really betrayed me, it licked Lucy's bottom lip, and she granted me entrance. My tongue shot into her mouth in an instant. With this I could hear the others sneaking up on us, so I simply cast a teleportation spell that moved me and Lucy to the apartment. I forced myself, with great difficulty, to get out of the kiss.

"Lucy, please. I need to explain to you why I was gone." I said, pain still in my eyes. It was her pain, her mental and emotional pain.

She just nodded slightly, eyes a little glazed from the extremely passionate kiss we shared.

"I left, because of what I am, Lucy, I'm a demon, as simple as that. If I can't learn to control my desires, then I will kill everyone around me, except for you of course. Lucy, I'm sorry for leaving without telling anyone, but I knew if I told someone that would have made me stay or take them with me. I really did go to the Frozen Wastes, honestly. Anyone else would have frozen to death. Except for Gray, but you know how much we fight." I said, rambled really. I was afraid I was gonna lose control over myself again.

"I don't care, just make up for lost time or something. I want you Natsu, and I've only wanted you more every day for the three years you've been gone. So whatever you want to do to me, but please, just don't... don't... don't l.... don't leave me... again." Lucy was crying now, sobbing so hard that I was afraid she was going to pass out.

"If I leave again Lucy, I'm taking you with me." I growled protectively.

Then, in order to calm her down I started to hear my body up in order to get her muscles to relax. She passed out nearly instantly when I finally was able to carry her to get bed. I sat next to it, my hair turning back to pink. Yeah, I'm an idiot, but I think I've accepted that.