"So today we are in a local bar." 

"Looking for someone who Q can ask to be his roommate for a month." 

"Nope, not just a month Sal," Murr says.

"Oh yeah, you're right."

"Wait what?" I look at them all. 

"IT'S GOING TO BE A YEAR!" Murr says, followed by him jumping up and down with excitement.  

"No. Guys come on. Please no."

"We know it's not the greatest punishment. However, at least with this punishment, you guys will hopefully get to see daily uploads of all the shit that goes on in their lives" Joe says to the camera and laughs.

"Now the thing is Q, the person you chose, well we choose, is going to be a woman," Sal says as he pat's my shoulder.

"Oh, guys come on. You're killing me. Why?" 

"Because it's fun and why not. You have to get the girl we choose to move in with you." Sal continues. 

"And if I don't"

"As a replacement punishment, we will cover you in peanut butter and birdseed, then stick you in the park" Murr replies. "For all the animals to enjoy you." He adds. 

"You guys are fucking crazy."

"Well you chose us as your best friends, now get out into that bar and mingle, before we tell you who is going to be your new roommate." 

With that said I walk out into the bar. Not too many people, but enough are here.

"Hi." "Hi." "Hi," I say waving my hand slightly.

"Is that all you're going to say Q?" Sal asks me?

"You sound like a little kid" Joe adds. 

"Shut up guys," I say as I sit down at the bar and start talking to the guy next to me and his wife. "So how long have you two been married?"

"Oh, we've been married for ten years now." The wife tells me. 

"Oh wow. Long time"

"It's been a bit yes. You married?" The man asks.

"Q tells him no because you think that marriage is wrong," Murr tells me and I hear all the guys laugh. 

"Nope, I uh ... I uh think that marriage is wrong." 

"Oh, why's that?" The man asks.

"Tell him it's archaic and why would anyone want to subject themselves to being with someone forever," Joe says.

I tell the man exactly what Joe says.

Well, best of luck to you." The husband tells me as they get up and leave.

"DID YOU SEE THE LOOK ON THE GUYS FACE!?" Sal laughs. 

"He looked at me like I was going to die alone of sadness," I tell them.

I hear all of them laugh loud for a little while then it's quiet again. "Okay please tell me who I'm supposed to ask now."

"Okay Q. You see the girl sitting down alone wearing the red scarf."

I look around finally finding her. She looks very cute in the scarf. "Yeah, Joe." 

"Go to her, she's the one." 

I get up with my drink and go sit down next to her.

"Can I help you?" She asks me confused as to why I'm there.

"Um ... yeah."

"With?"

"Will you, no, um would you, no."

"Just spit it out already."

"Do you need a place to stay? For free I might add."

"No, I don't. Why are you asking?"

"Q, tell her well I have the place for you, and be all enthused about it," Sal says.

I laugh a little. "Well, I have the place for you!" I tell her as I do thumbs up and smile.

She laughs. "Did you not hear me?"

"Tell her you did hear her but chose to ignore it," Murr says.

"I did, but I chose to ignore it." She's looking at me like I'm crazy.

"Why do you need someone to move to a place that's free?"

"Okay well you see, it would be moving into my home for free. Free everything. Food, transportation, bed, everything. I need a roommate."

"But why? You seem like a very grown man." She says eyeing me up and down.

"Guys."

"Guys?" She questions me.

It seems they're not going to help me. "Okay, so I'm going out on a limb here by saying you don't know who I am."

"No, I don't." She responds.

"My name is Brian Quinn, Q, my friends and I have this show on TruTv called Impractical Jokers. All of us go out and do these random things on each episode. The trick is that each of us has to do what the other jokers tell us to do or say. If we don't we lose."
 
"And this is watched by people?"

"Yes, actually by lots of people," I tell her.

"Sounds like a weird show."

"It's pretty fun and funny sometimes. So when we lose we get punishments. Which can be various things."

At that moment the other guys come out and over to us.

"Oh look here are my best friends now," I say to her as I stare at them. "This is Murr, James, his last name is Murray so we usually call him Murr. This is Joe and this is Sal." I tell her pointing at them respectively. 

"Hello." She says waving to them all.

"Like Q said we get punishments. One time I had to get my nipples and belly button pierced" Murr says.

"That seems a little harsh." She tells him.

"One time we all went to Sal's house and messed around, he's a germaphobe. Joe laid on his couch naked and pretended to be sick and stuffed tissue in his couch." I tell her.

She looks at Sal for confirmation, to which he nods his head in agreement. 

"I one time had to dress up as a model and talk to people about apps and technology, but I thought I was going to be doing a runway show," Joe says chuckling after a little bit.

"Okay, so what does any of this have to do with me?" She asks.

"So Q's punishment is that he has to get a woman to move in with him and be his roommate for a year," Murr says.

"Why is this his punishment?"

"Because we wanted to mess with him," Joe says. "Simple."

"So what do you say?" "Would you please move in with me for a year?" I ask her.

"And if I don't?"

"Then his replacement punishment is that he gets rolled in peanut butter and birdseed and gets stuck out in the park."

"Wouldn't that be easier?" She asks.

"I hate peanut butter," I tell her.

We sit in silence for at least 3 minutes. She keeps looking at us all. Back and forth.

"Okay, I'll do it."

"For real?" I ask.

"Yes for real."

"What!?" Murr says.

"Wow, man I can't believe you got someone to do it." Joe chimes in.

"Thank you so much ..." I pause waiting for her to tell me her name.

"Ellie."

"Thank you so much, Ellie."

"No problem."

Now to survive a whole year with a stranger in my home.