I didn't really felt lonely the last few month, because i had persons in my life i could talk to. I could talk to them the whole day and night. One of them left.. i don't have contact to him anymore and i probably never will again and i accepted it even tho i miss him sometimes. Miss the late night calls and the text. But i still had the other person. I was up all night to text and called with her. And now she was busy. She did something with her friends and i am happy that she does. I'm really happy because i want her to be happy. But when she doesn't do anything with her friends, she still is really available. I mean we still text but its not much. It's not how it was. Mostly when i send some audios she can't listen to them because she is on a call. And thats fine. It's fine that she has someone to talk to and calls with them but i just fell lonely. When i talked and texted to them i didn't had the feeling anymore. It was okay that i don't really have social contacts but now i got reminded of this feeling again. Ans sure everyone has their own life and i should have some as well but i just feel so lonely right now. I don't go to school baca use it destroyers me but i hate this feeling. I hate it to get jealous because i don't want that. This will probably change again and we will text each other more but still. I am so freaking lonely and i don't know what to do absolut that. Like what could i change? Because i don't know. I really don't know. I can't go to school because my health just sucks and it just to much pressure and even when i would go to school.. no one likes me there. I don't talk with the persons in school. I am lonely there as well so why should i try it? I just want this feeling to be gone. I always say that i don't need that many people and i don't need them to be around but thats not true. I want to go outside with friends and live my life but i can't. I want to be happy, i don't want to feel that lonely but i can't change that. I can't say to people that they should like me because its okay of they don't. But what am i doing wrong? I live i this city since 6 years were in 3 different classes and still don't have friends so i clearly do something wrong but i can't tell why.. What am i doing wrong? Why am i so freaking lonely?