Date: 24th April, 2016.

I have lost all the motivation to write. I don't want to anymore, ugh.

"It isn't always popping pills, drinking whiskey, or slicing veins.

Sometimes, its crossing the street without looking; sometimes it's not wearing your seatbelt.

And sometimes, it is as simple as staying up all night because you don't want tomorrow to come."

ALASKA'S POV

Four months later

It was four in the morning and Blaze and I lay awake, talking. Our naked bodies intertwined beneath the sheets and our breaths synchronised, telling each other what we were afraid of.

"My worst fear is forgetting mum.", Blaze released a shaky breath. "I mean, she passed away a while ago and all of my memories of her are fading away. I am starting to forget the exact shade of her hair colour and the sound of her voice. I am starting to forget the taste of her food and how her touch felt. Everyday a little part of my memories fade away and I don't want them to. I don't want to forget her." A tear lead out of his eye.

My hand reached up and wiped the tears that were now flowing down freely his face. I lay my head on his chest and tightly wrapped my arms around his torso. "I know that I suck at making things better, but you know, you will be fine. She is so proud of you for how far you have come. Remember, when she died, you told me you won't make it this far? But guess what baby, you did. You came so far, moulding yourself into a better person and got past the bullshit life threw at you. You have survived 100% of your bad days." I looked up at him and smiled. I placed my hand on his now dry cheek and repeated what I had said earlier, "You will be fine."

Blaze smiled down and me and kissed me softly. I never wanted this to end. I wanted it to be just us, against the whole word. With him by my side, I think I could take anything that life threw at me. He was my strength and I was his.

At some point, we fell asleep, snuggled into each other and to be honest, that was the best sleep I had ever had in a long, long time.

The next morning when I woke up, I felt tired and refreshed at the same time. I quickly showered and got dressed and by the time I came back, Blaze was still sleeping. I grinned and sat on him, a devious idea coming into my mind.

I leaned forward and put my lips next to his ear, taking a deep breath, I shouted, "Get up, fatass." Blaze jumped and I landed on the space next to him, on the bed. Taking in his expression of shock and confusion, I laughed.

He smirked and said, 'Oh, you're so getting it."

I quickly jumped out of the bed, ninja style (more like clumsily) and ran out of the room, squealing and Blaze emerged a few seconds later with nothing but boxers on. I laughed and ran faster, trying to get away from him. I ran all around the house, bumping into Kyle at last.

I told him to be quiet and I sprinted towards the back door, making my way towards the backyard.

I could hear Blaze asking Kyle whether he had seen me and in reply, Kyle told him I had sprinted in the living room.

Good boy, Kyle.

I rushed towards the house and tip toed to my bedroom. I sat on my bed and enjoyed the silence, closing my eyes, giving my aching feet a rest. About fifteen minutes later, the door knob of the door jingled and Blaze walked in with a slight frown on his face.

"Give up already." I told him, with a sly smile etched on my face.

He smirked and walked towards me like a predator walked towards his prey, not making a sound. I observed him with guarded eyes and waited for him to make him move. He did nothing but kiss me and I kissed back.

I think this is what heaven felt like.

Thirty minutes later, we were all packed and set for the beach. I got into Blaze's car and we drove off, way past the speed limit.

I still couldn't get over his car.

By the time we reached, everyone was already there.

"What took you so long, babe?" Liam wiggled his eyebrows, his eyes flickering in between Blaze and I.

"Oh, shut up." I said, blushing.

He slung an arm on my shoulder and we walked where the others were, chatting animatedly.

"Hey Al!" Damien exclaimed and hugged me.

I smiled and hugged him back. After 'reuniting' after two days everyone sat on the logs on the beach, in a circle.

"So, graduation is coming up." Sean randomly spoke up.

"Yeah, just two months away." Blaze replied pulling me towards him.

"I can't wait for the exams to get over." Ashton whined. "I wanna play Xbox", he further elaborated.

"It is going to be a heck of a summer, this year." Leo grinned wolfishly and murmurs of agreement were passed around.

Blaze kissed my neck and I wrapped my arm around his waist. "Let's go on a road trip." I suggested, speaking up what was on my mind.

"I'm totally up for it." Blaze said, pulling away from me.

"Yeah, me too!" Lim exclaimed like he was a small kid on a Christmas morning, seeing his presents under the tree.

"I'm ready, too." Liz said.

"Mhmm, same." Zack and Shawn spoke up in sync.

Creepy.

"Yeah, let's do it" Noah spoke up.

And so the others agreed too. I looked up at Blaze and he kissed me, smiling.

"You're cute when you're excited." He whispered as he rest his face in the crook of my neck.

I blushed and hid my face in my hands, flustered.

"Why so touchy suddenly?" Noah wiggled his eyebrows and all the attention was on us.

Blaze tossed him a smirk and said, "Guess?"

He widened his eyes and cursed, "Holy shit!"

Blaze just replied with a toothy chuckle and I turned into a tomato. Figuratively, of course.

"When? When? When? When?" Liam chanted.

"Last night." I said, trying to control the blood rushing to my cheeks.

"How was it?" Sean wiggled his eyebrows.

What was with everyone wiggling their eyebrows today?!

"The best." Blaze smirked. "We actually laughed while doing it."

"Shut up!" I snapped at Blaze with my eyes wide.

I somehow managed to change the subject and convinced everyone to go in the water. We were in there, having water fights for hours and playing Chicken. We finally decided to get out when our skin turned extremely pruney and gross.

I had talked to Liz a little less than usual but Blaze and I were in our own little world, not totally detached from others, though.

I finally felt happy after a long time, and meant it.

To be honest, Blaze and I were going great. We had been on several dates and by several I mean a lot, and Blaze brought me gifts too even if I refused him to. In return, I did the same. School was great too, everyone had predicted that Blaze and I would end up together. Alice had backed away from Blaze and she had once told me that she was happy for us. I had genuinely smiled and thanked her.

Yeah, there were occasional blonde bimbos that came up to Blaze but I trusted him with all my heart and I knew he won't do anything to hurt me.

And he hadn't.

Ashton snapping fingers in front of my eyes brought me back to reality.

"You zoned out." He chucked.

I shook my head, smiling and followed him to where others were sitting. Everyone sat on the same logs when we arrived but the difference was that we had a lit bonfire in the centre of the circle.

I sat next to Blaze and rest my head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around my waist and we sat there content with each other's company, in silence.

I concentrated on the different colours of the sky and how the sun was setting a little with every passing second. The orange colour lightly faded into purple. The view was absolutely breathtaking.

"... was so annoyed and angry and I scowled at her. I mean, it was her fault that we were stuck there, so then I told her-"

"Come with me" Blaze whispered in my ear, cutting Sean off.

"We'll be back in some" I informed them and walked away, giving Liz a small smile. She frowned back.

Blaze took my hand in his and dragged me away. We walked on the beach for a few minutes and talked about what were we going to do about college. We talked about random things until Blaze pulled me to a stop.

He out his hand into his shorts pocket and pulled out a necklace. It was so beautiful. He turned me around and put in on for me. I looked at the pendant and my eyes filled with happy tears. It was a dictionary pendant and on the back these words were engraved, "Fucking blue think over your head, dumbass" and my mind instantly flashed back to the time when we had this conversation and chucked.

Instead of arguing, I laughed a shaky laugh and I hugged him tight. He hugged me back and we kissed for what felt like forever.

"You make me so happy." I told him, smiling huge.

I love you.

"Well, you make me happier." Smiling just as huge.

"Oh, but boy, you make me the happiest." I told him, with my hands around his waist, smiling cheesily.

When we returned, everyone had a can of beer in their hands and Blaze refused the drink, when offered. I shook my head when they offered me, too. It was illegal, underage drinking, I mean.

After a while, we drove home and Blaze came over. We hung out for awhile and then dad, Kyle, Blaze and I were watching football in the living room.

"Hey! No! No! No! No! Towards your left!" Kyle screamed at the screen.

I followed suit and screamed at the screen, fully aware that it wouldn't make any difference, "No, you dim-wit. Pass the ball to him! He's open! Can't you see, you dumbass!"

"You know they can't hear you, right?" Blaze asked.

"Oh, fuck off."

"Hey! Saying fuck in the living room is not allowed." Dad chided and at that exact moment, Kyle shouted. "You fucking idiot! You could have saved that goal! The defence sucks!"

"Oh, never mind." My dad muttered and walked away, shaking his head.

Blaze left after having dinner with my family. Today, surprising mum, dad, Kyle, Blaze and I had dinner together after a long time and we joked around a lot. It finally felt like home.

I waked into my room, exhausted and hopped into the shower. I throughly washed myself, getting rid of the sand and ocean smell. I got beneath the clean, crisp sheets and laid down.

I called up Blaze and we talked for hours. He fell asleep while talking to me and I hung up, smilingly.

It was then that the gut feeling hit me. Suddenly, something felt wrong.

Everything felt wrong.

I felt an extreme wave of paranoia wash over me. Something bad was bound to happen and it was soon. I called up Blaze and left him a voicemail, when he didn't pick up the phone. Tossing and turning, I fell asleep after a few minutes, or so I thought.

Somewhere in the middle of the night, I could hear my bedroom open and close. I couldn't tell if it was a dream or not. It was like my ears were alert but my eyes wouldn't open, however hard I tried.

I heard some footsteps and I thought to myself this is definitely a dream and I couldn't wake up. It has happened before, after all.

I heard the footsteps near the bed and then stop.

I heard a voice saying, "You think you are oh-so great and the world revolves around you? But guess what, bitch? It doesn't. You have everyone wrapped around your filthy little finger. Everyone! But they don't see what you truly are, they'll leave you when you do." There was a pause and the voice of whom I couldn't place a finger on, suddenly turned cold and venomous, full of hate. "Here, take this!"

I could feel something fall on my arm. It tried to get up but I couldn't. This was so scary.

"I don't want anything of yours. I hate you! I hate you! I hate you! And I think it's time for me to get rid of you."

A small laugh escaped her lips.

I felt a cloth being placed on my nose and I struggled to open my eyes open. Just as I did, I saw a person in a black hoodie and I widened my eyes. The cloth with chloroform got placed harder and before I could make out who it was and hold my breath, suddenly everything turned bla-

________________________

Position: #1 in Teen Fiction.

The book is going to be over so soon.

All the Love,
Pia xx

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