11:29pm

What's up fuckbags

Let's put a whole...spin on the ol' anxiety blockers usual plot, eh?

Au
—

Logan rose up into the living room as soon as Thomas had sat himself down on his couch, clenching his hands together on his lap. Silently Logan took the spot beside him, understanding this was a very delicate situation. It had been for the past week, he was truly up for anything to move past this phase.

"How was it?" Logan murmured quietly, Thomas took a quick glance at him but he felt much more comfortable staring intently at his carpeted floor, squeezing his hands nervously. "Fine-I-..I got them" he responded just as quietly, barely above a whisper. He hasn't had it in him to talk these past few days, let alone in his usual volume. Logan nodded and looked over towards the kitchen, spotting the small bag sitting on the counter through the window.

This decision was a serious last resort, due to upcoming plays, YouTube videos, and general stressful life activities Thomas had been plagued with increased anxiety each day, becoming worse and worse. Of course he's annoyed, he just wants it to go away, but he's not annoyed at Virgil per se, he knows the side can't just stop feeling anxiety, while breathing techniques have allowed him rest bites it still comes roaring back up, even when cuddling his boyfriend who - bless him - has been so patient but in the end he couldn't bare it anymore.

He hated, more than anything, to see the people he loves suffering, which was why he was the first to suggest it.

Anxiety blockers.

Everyone was a bit hesitant, especially Thomas who would never want Virgil to feel...repressed or forcefully shut down, but Virgil wasn't at all offended by the idea. He didn't exactly agree to it at first, his sprouting anxiety made a whirlwind of thoughts cascade through his mind; what would they do to him? The pills?

But in the end he didn't care, he needed to relax, settle down, he couldn't live under such stress for another week! It was torture for the poor side, including Thomas who's been getting the runt of it too. He really needs a less-stressful episode to be more productive, but the stress leads to his inability to record or practice for his play, which creates more and more anxiety, a harsh continuous cycle that can't be stopped through simple cuddling, talking, and breathing. Not anymore.

Thomas has never needed them in the past, his anxiety isn't that bad and usually all it takes is a simple conversation with his friends, or a relaxed evening - but he's overworked himself to the brink of a mental breakdown and he really, really didn't want to go through that. Not now of all times. All he needed was a good night sleep, he was exhausted and ready to pass out at any opportune moment throughout the day.

Logan understood the 'overworking' aspect to this the most, it was a battle for him too, his brain working a mile a minute, every day, non-stop. He needed a break just as desperately, and knew Roman and Patton were going through it too, Roman sucked dry of creative ideas and Patton's emotions a train wreck.

Which is why he knew, deep down, while this was subject to controversy they needed this.

"Shall I summon Virgil?"

Thomas took in a wavering breath, then shook his head. "No I-I'll come there"

Logan nodded, for awhile Virgil had been bed-ridden to the couch, wrapped in a blanket and cared for continuously. He hasn't found it in him to move for awhile, and Thomas would hate to disturb him.

The two sunk out and appeared in the common room, Roman was draped across Virgil who buried himself into his side, face hidden in his neck. Roman was half asleep, the dark purple bags layered under his eyes prominent against his harshly pale skin. They all looked very similar, even worse for Virgil who had never seemed so sick.

Patton, who was also sitting on the couch, stood up and gave Thomas a soft hug, praising him quietly for leaving the house to get what he needed. They all needed. Thomas found it in him to smile and hug back, but an unfortunate small smile that didn't last long.

Taking a seat, Roman blinked a few times at the movement, taking a second to realise what was happening before pushing himself up. "Sit up for me Dearest, for a few minutes" Roman urged, helping his poor boyfriend to hold his head up and gaze at Thomas who smiled sympathetically at his anxiety - he felt very similar to how Virgil looked.

"Did you get them?" He croaked, after Thomas nodded Virgil groaned. "Fuck-...does it not work?"

Thomas quirked an eyebrow in confusion, then shook his head. "I haven't taken them yet, I-"

"Christ, Sanders! What did you get them for!? To admire!?" Instantly Virgil winced, his doubled anxiety really puts him in bad moods, easily triggered by any slight thing that may be annoying.

"Sorry.." he apologised weakly, but he knew Thomas understood, they all did and he couldn't be more grateful.

"It's okay, Virge" Thomas smiled, "I wanted you to know first, after all I.." he shuffled closer, resting his hand on top of Virgil's. "I want your consent first. To taking one...I also want you to know you're still incredibly important, Virge, and this will be a one-off thing. I don't want and never will want to take something that'll hold you back, but this is for you"

Virgil managed a gentle smile, what did he do to deserve such an incredible host? He feels like he hasn't done anything, and honestly deserves for Thomas to be incredibly cruel to him - but that wasn't Thomas, and he certainly wasn't complaining.

"Yeah, take 'em, please.." he really, really needed to calm down. Every moment anxiety swarmed his chest and he truly wanted to fall asleep and never wake up, but sleeping was almost impossible at this point. He also despised snapping at the people who were only trying to help.

"Okay, it should kick in soon" Thomas squeezed Virgil's hand once more and left, Logan quickly followed suit, leaving Roman, Patton and Virgil to cuddle back close on the couch. Patton knew Roman would pass out from exhaustion any time soon but wouldn't let himself rest until he was sure Virgil was in safe hands, so after Patton cuddled up close and became the support Virgil could lean on Roman laid his head on his boyfriend's lap and dozed off instantly.

Virgil played with his hair gently, while he was mostly tense the nostalgic and warm breath of air that seemed to float around Patton brought on a small sense of comfort, he knew it would get stronger after Thomas has taken the blocker.

"I love you" Patton whispered delicately, Virgil's chest stuttered, does he love you? No he doesn't-no he doesn't-!

"Love you too, Popstar"

Patton giggled and hugged Virgil tighter, pressing a kiss to the crown of his 'sons' head. Patton had been a great help over the week, even if that meant neglecting his own needs. He loves his kiddos (especially Logan) and would push himself aside for them, while this has caused them to worry, he decided the best thing to do was care for everyone and himself, for he hated making them even more worried.

"Mhm..love...too" Roman murmured, drunken off sleep, only the tiniest part of him still awake but barely aware. Patton giggled again, leaning down to kiss Roman's head too. The side leaned into the affection with a gentle smile gracing his lips. Virgil felt his heart melt like honey; he loved his family. 

"It should take an hour to reach it's full effect" Logan stated once he reappeared. "Thomas is currently relaxed in bed, watching cartoons from his laptop. Hopefully he will fall asleep soon, same goes for you, Virgil" while talking he sat down on the couch close by, he offered a soft smile to them all. He could see them all wilted with fatigue, including himself but he was able to at least sit up straight - the best call of action would be to sleep in their respective beds but he knew that wasn't happening anytime soon.

"I suppose we will be here for awhile" he admitted, "Patton, I suggest you lift your legs onto the couch" Patton tilted his head to the side but Logan wasn't offering any answers, so he shifted and did so, Roman and Virgil already had their legs up so after repeating the same action himself Logan clicked his fingers and suddenly the couch stretched out into a bed, complete with a large, thick duvet and pillows to the side which they could pull over and use once they all laid down.

Patton gasped and sat up excitedly, happily stretching his legs across the comfortable bedding. "Logan! This is awesome!" He exclaimed in hushed tones, shaking Virgil a little so the side would open his eyes and see what had happened, lips quirking into a lazy smile. "Nice.." he murmured, sending a look to Logan who nodded slightly in acknowledgment.

As Logan was the only one with most the energy left, he clicked his fingers and changed everyone into their comfortable onesies, this time making sure Roman wasn't wearing his suit underneath.

"Shit-oh god..." Virgil whispered, slipping from Patton's side to rest on the back of the couch. "It's kicking in, holy shit...this is fucking paradise"

Relaxed, Patton didn't have the heart to reprimand his language, instead hugged his kiddo happily. "Oh! I'm so glad" he kissed his forehead affectionately then helped him lay down while Logan sorted out Roman. Even if they were starting to work Virgil was still majorly anxious and drained, so used Patton's support a lot while laying down and propping his head onto a comfortable plumped up pillow.

"Fuck...can Thomas take these everyday?" Virgil sighed out, feeling his heart rate decrease tremendously. Patton laughed gently and cuddled up to his side, allowing him to wrap his arms around Roman. "I would not advise it, Thomas still needs your fight or flight instincts. To be relaxed all the time will cause-"

"Will ya sleep already, nerd?" Virgil cut him off and Logan huffed out a snort, laying beside Roman who was out of it. No one could blame him, in fact they all wished to be in his state.

"Fine. Goodnight, you two"

"Night Lo! Night Virge! Love you!"

Virgil smiled and let out another long sigh, "love you too..."

Only ten minutes later they were all asleep, including Thomas who managed to shut off his laptop before slipping into slumber.

While they slept, two other sides appeared in the room that had dimmed in lighting since Thomas was now asleep. "Ugh! Is he better now?" Remus whined, of course he wasn't drained at all compared to Roman due to Thomas never using his creative ideas. He was pretty much unaffected. "They're not fun to mess with when they're tired!" He pouted, throwing his moonstar up rest on his shoulder.

Deceit watched the four sides fast asleep, tucked up on the created bed. "Thomas was smart, for once" Deceit mused, turning to his crazed lover boy. "They'll all be normal in a few days to come, sweetheart"

"Fuck yes!" He pumped the air, swinging his moonstar in joy. "In the mean time" Deceit let his eyes wander in that mysterious way, one that made Remus stand taller and grow a smirk under his moustache. "Why won't we have our own..." Deceit took a mild glance at the sides, "relaxing activities?"

Meaning the complete opposite Remus giggled in delight, the two disappearing back to their side of the mind.

But deep down the two sides were happy; knowing the 'light sides' were to come back to normal made them happy. And what better way to express that happiness than with each other in that special, intimate way?

—
Oh how the turns have tabled

So I learnt about anxiety blockers (beta-blockers) in psychology todaaayy, they just...calm down anxiety, so now all the stories of Thomas taking an anxiety pill and it hurting/killing Virgil really doesn't make sense because it doesn't stop the anxiety forever? Or harm it...? ...oops lmao- 💀

I mean write what you want though no judgement

12:31am