6:49pm

Trigger warning: toxic relationship, non-detailed smut scene, mentions of abuse

I'm gonna listen to 'Country Roads' on repeat while writing this one

AU
—

His blurry vision stared at the wall he laid opposite to, body still waking up in that early morning. He felt like he was still asleep, almost, laying completely still as he focused on the feeling of Kaiden's rising chest pressing against his back with every breath he dragged in. Slowly, he began to shift his position, pushing himself backwards into the comforting arms that were wrapped around his stomach, it was mostly done out of his sleepy state, still not entirely with it.

He let his mind wonder, remembering what happened yesterday after Kaiden arrived home. He was drunk, Roman didn't mind that part, Kaiden was quite amusing while in this state, and would lay onto of Roman for hours, murmuring complete nonsense that always made him laugh. But, last night was different, he was angry-drunk.

Roman had awoken to the sound of a door slamming, and he clenched the blanket covering his body, eyes darting towards the door way as he heard grunts from downstairs and something smashing against the wall. At first, he didn't even think of the possibilities that it could be Kaiden, he has never acted like that before, but when Roman grabbed a bat and slowly slipped down the staircase, he let out a shocked gasp when he watched Kaiden punch the wall. 

He went to try and calm him down, but Roman seemed to get most of his anger laid out on him.

His hand subconsciously reached for his neck, closing his eyes as flashes of Kaiden's dark eyes came into his vision, strong hands clamped around his neck, unable to breathe as his ringing ears were filled with yells that seemed never ending, his feet dangling above the ground as his body was lifted further and further into the air, with his shoulder blades digging painfully into the wall.

His eyes snapped open, parted lips letting out a startled gasp. A day-dreamed nightmare.

Biting his lip, he tried not to think about it, and instead focused on the worry that was shining in Kaiden's eyes after he did what he did, laying Roman gently on the bed, pressing ice against his bruising neck, asking again and again if he was alright, and if he needed anything, and that he loved him so much. He didn't mean to do it, his friends pranked him, and he was pissed, Roman could understand that.

He was terrified, and still kind of is, but if Kaiden knew that...would he get mad again?

Rolling around onto his other side, Roman's arms loosely coiled around his neck, face pressing into his warm chest for the few more minutes Kaiden would be asleep. Roman pondered if Kaiden would go to the gym today, or stay home to make sure Roman didn't leave. Even if he cared for him deeply, Roman knew he would get into deep shit if anyone saw the bruises, and...out of the kindness of his heart, didn't want that to happen, because he would rather spend time with Roman instead of in prison!

Yeah..that...that was why.

Roman grimaced, biting his lip in worry. Most of him didn't even believe that pathetic excuse, but Kaiden's anger levels were high on his mind at that point, and he didn't want to question him, so he would rather make up something in his mind that somewhat reassured him instead of prying for the real reason and possibly get hurt in the process.

He never would've imagined Kaiden to ever hurt him...

"Morning, baby"

Roman flinched at his voice, but played it off as if he were stretching, sending a smile to Kaiden who smiled back, eyes traveling down to his neck. From his expression alone Roman knew it was in bad shape, but he tried to ignore that fact, leaning into to peck his lips a few times, smiling when Kaiden did, too.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you" Kaiden murmured into his neck after kissing the area gently, relishing in the soft giggles that escaped Roman's lips.

"It's alright, you didn't mean it" Roman replied back, and somewhere in their small conversation Kaiden had rolled Roman onto his back and pushed back the covers, his hands resting on his waist while his lips went over small markings he left on his collarbone before, but he was gentle and caring with the way he caressed Roman's skin, making the man relax against the mattress, sighing out in content.

He felt Kaiden tug at the bottom of his shirt, his eyes slowly opening to meet his. He knew where this was going, and he didn't know if he wanted it...but they haven't done it in awhile, and he wanted Kaiden to feel better, so he sat up and helped Kaiden in taking off his shirt, laying back down and closing his eyes as he focused on the feeling of his lips kissing down his stomach to his v-line, slowly pulling down his pyjama bottoms and boxers.

Shuddering, Roman swallowed the lump in his throat, feeling his stomach churn in a bad way. A wrong way. Something he shouldn't feel during this. He tried to make himself feel like he wanted this, forcing himself to moan in pleasure as Kaiden took him into his mouth for a few seconds, preparing him before he would presumably fuck him senselessly.

He hated rough sex, while Kaiden loved it, he wanted to be cared for during this, for this to be intimate, but Kaiden makes it short and quick. Pleasurable for him, not for Roman.

Afterwards, he somewhat feels used, but he also feels happy he was able to give Kaiden what he wanted without having to do much, so as he was rolled onto his stomach and told to kneel, he did as he was told, clenching shut his eyes as his body rocked back and fourth with the thrusting from Kaiden, repeating over and over that this was for Kaiden's happiness, and Roman would be selfish if he took that away from him. 

Later that morning, Roman stepped out of the shower, his body red from scrubbing the skin. He felt used, dirty, he just wanted the feeling of his hands off of his body, and it sort of worked, but Roman still felt fucking awful.

Stepping into his bedroom his nose twisted up from the scent of sex that hit it. Heading towards the window, he threw open the curtains and pushed it open, breathing in fresh air from the outside world deeply. Leaning on the sill, his eyes focused on the nest of birds, a small smile forming it's way onto his lips. He wondered if he would ever get to see the day when they were ready to leave the nest and fly off to start their own little families while leaving their parents behind...

He hoped so, these little birds meant a lot to him. Stupid, he knows that, but he watched them all come out of their little eggs and cry for food, it was heartwarming to see, and he felt like he needed to see them go.

Remembering he was standing in the towel, he turned around and grabbed a comfortable shirt from the closet, pulling it over his head while he groped around in his draw for boxers and a pair of white jeans. His favourite type.

Folding the towels back in the bathroom, he left the room and slowly stepped down the staircase, eyes lingering on the wall he was pressed against-...shut up, Roman.

He spotted Kaiden sprawled across the couch, mindlessly watching tv with a blank expression. He left pretty quickly after he finished, leaving Roman to clean up everything while he had a quick shower and went downstairs to cook himself up some breakfast. Roman didn't mind entirely, besides there was an extra plate filled with his favourite morning brunch on the counter, so with a smile he ate the foot while sitting cross-legged on the arm chair.

"Baby?"

Roman hummed in response,  eyes averting to Kaiden's. The man slowly sat up, sighing out a little while scratching the back of his neck. Whatever he was going to say was obviously a little touchy, but Roman knew what he was going to say, it was obvious, he's done it in the past. Hiding an eye roll, Roman wished he would just get on with it, and not bother to act sincere.

"With that...bruising, people might think of me in the wrong way" Kaiden finally expressed, Roman tilting his head in mock-confusion. Honestly, Kaiden took Roman to be more naïve than he actually was.

"Will you stay home? Until the bruising gone? Then we could go for a date" Kaiden suggested with a smile, it widening when Roman placed his empty plate on the coffee table to sit on Kaiden's lap, pressing a short kiss to his cheek. "Sure, I have to tidy up anyway" he agreed, smiling when Kaiden's arms wound around his waist.

"Thank you, baby, I gotta go, but I'll be back in a few hours" nodding, they shared a lingering kiss before Kaiden grabbed his stuff and left, leaving Roman to close and lock the door, leaning on the wood heavily. He hasn't actually seen the damage done from last night, and he didn't really want to, as it would make it more real than he wanted to believe.

Roman will confirm he does love Kaiden with all his heart, but with being blinded, he didn't realise he could do so much better, that he deserved someone who actually loves him back, not someone who uses him, hurts him, lies to him, orders him around, manipulates him, the list goes on. The list Roman subconsciously keeps in the back of his mind, tucked behind everything good about Kaiden.

Sticking to his word, Roman stayed home all day, cleaning up the mess that had accumulated over the past few weeks. The only time he actually spoke to anyone was when Virgil called him around four pm.

"Hey, buddy, you alright?" His voice seeped through the speakers, unknowingly creating a smile that resided on Roman's lips. Taking a seat on the couch, Roman put it on speaker and let his phone rest on his knee.

"Of course!" He giggled, "why wouldn't I be?"

"D'you really want me to answer that?" Roman went to ask what he meant, but Patton's voice suddenly filled his ears.

"Hey, Kiddo! We haven't heard from you all day! He just wanted to make sure everything was okay, and if you need anything, we'll come straight over!" Patton was so kind and loving, it made Roman's heart swell, he loved his friends.

"That's so sweet of you guys" he gushed, "but like I said I'm okay!" His hand rested on his neck as he did, shifting slightly when he was reminded of the dull throbbing that lingered at the bottom of his back. "How are you?"

"We're fine" Virgil replied, Logan quickly speaking up after he did.

"We also called to ask if you would want to accompany us tomorrow, we have planned to go to the zoo" Roman lit up at the idea, he absolutely loved the zoo! But his heart sank when he remembered Kaiden, the bruising wouldn't go down over night, but he really wanted to go...

"Uh, hang on!" Grabbing his phone he jumped up, dashing through the house to his bedroom, pulling open the draws until his eyes landed on some makeup he had collected over the years. It wasn't often he would wear it, only to cover up some spots or marks that would appear on his face. He could use this to cover the bruising, and if he did something for Kaiden he was sure he would be allowed to go.

"Yes, I would love to!" He exclaimed happily, bouncing around his room until he landed before the window, eyes focused on the baby birds as he listened to his friends. Patton cheered in the background, the others giving him the smaller details before they all hung up, leaving Roman to fall against the bed, a wide grin stretched across his face.

He hoped Kaiden would let him go, he loved spending the day with Virgil!... And the other two, of course.

—

Part three...?

8:28pm