8:24pm

Ohmygod fucking gays

Trigger warning: Neglectful parents

Au
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Two boys walking down the same path, eyes glued to the objects in their hand. One held a phone, tapping against the screen hurriedly as they texted their group of friends, the other held a book they were devoted to, the world of the fantasy swirling in his mind as he imagined what everything the book described to look like. They weren't paying attention to the world around them, which was why when they bumped shoulders and crashed to the ground with a yelp and a groan, they kinda expected it.

Book-boy got up first, dusting and straightening his clothes. "I do apologise, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going" he held out a hand to the boy who had his face towards the ground as he replied. "It's alright! Completely my fault there..." gripping his hand, book-boy hauled phone-boy up, which was when the two finally got a good look at the others face and gasped.

"Why, hello~" Phone-boy drawled seductively, realising this nerdy looking boy looked strangely exactly like him. If he lost the glasses, and grew his hair a little longer, they'd look like they were twins! "I'm Roman, and you are?" He carried on, reaching down to grip the back of book-boys hand, leaning it up to his lips to press a kiss against the smooth skin.

Book-boy rose an eyebrow, perplexed at his behaviour. He had never seen a teenager act like this, and he didn't expect any teen to act like this. Ever. "I am Logan" he eventually replied once Roman let go of his hand. The boy - who wore rather regal clothing - stood up straight and held his arms behind his back, eyes narrowed slightly as he did a full scan of Logan's face. Said boy was doing the same in return, yet looked very more subtle while doing so.

"Aren't you the most attractive boy I've ever met" Roman commented with a smirk. Logan rolled his eyes, sending him a 'really?' look.

"Aren't you the most egotistical boy I have ever met" Logan replied mockingly, bending down to scoop up his book, wiping down the hard-front cover a few times. "You must be new - I've only ever seen you in my mirror" Roman joked, realising the boy before him probably wasn't the 'jokey' kind. He looked smart and professional - even for a sixteen year old boy. He wore a tie for fucks sake! When did Roman ever think he would be amused by jokes?

"Yes, I am new" he confirmed with a slight nod of his head, "my parents and I moved in a few days ago" Roman nodded in response, bobbing on his feet awkwardly. "Well, it seems I have met my twin! Look at us! We're one of the same!" He ventured back into their appearance, opening his camera to hold in front of both their faces. They had scanned every detail, and they were practically the same...as if someone copied and pasted them.

"It is rather odd...but my parents would have told me if I had a twin" Logan sounded confident with his statement, so Roman had no belief the boy was lying. Besides, he would have known if he had a twin, too, so this whole conundrum was merely a coincidence - a rare one, at that.

"I have a proposal to make!" Roman suddenly bursted in delight, pocketing his phone. Logan leaned back slightly, raising his eyebrow questioningly. "Why don't we swap lives!? Like in those many, many...many Disney movies!?" He exclaimed like a child hyper on candy, biting his lips that had stretched into a wide grin, pearly white teeth on show and everything.

Logan felt apprehensive, this stranger who looked alike wanted to swap lives with him? That was preposterous! Right? Besides, he was never a fan of Disney. The only times he had watched the movies was with his parents when they thought they were the best movies for their young son to watch. Although, he had never seen the ones where characters "swapped lives" as Roman so proudly stated. As if he was the creator of Disney.

"I do not entirely understand what you mean-" Logan adjusted his glasses, nearly tumbling to the ground again when Roman suddenly jerked him over to the bench and sat him down forcefully, sitting beside him afterwards. "I mean we dress up like the other and live the others lives! Come on! Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like!? Living with another family?" He would probably start bouncing in his seat the teen seemed so elated at the idea - Logan almost felt bad for wanting to decline, but then he really thought about the offer - delving in deep into the possibilities.

He loved his parents, don't get him wrong, but he had always wanted to know what it would be like living with a sibling. Recently, his live had become quite boring, as it was the start of a new year in school, he wouldn't have too much school work; and people are always telling him to live a little - mainly his family as, admittedly, he doesn't have any friends - maybe he should take the offer...it's not every day you meet your double. Would it be safe? He couldn't imagine this boy to do any harm, then again you can't always trust people who seem safe from just their outer appearance.

"For how long?" Logan decided to ask instead of agreeing straight off. "Oh" Roman waves his hand around dismissively, "two weeks? At most? We could always call it off if it becomes too much" he reassured, diving into a further explanation. "I've always wanted to know what it's like to live another live, like I said before, it just seems so...thrilling! A one in a life time opportunity! Please!"

Logan wondered why this boy felt so desperate for a new life; maybe the prospect of being like a Disney star was the main reason why this royal-looking boy wanted this.

He clicked his tongue in thought, eyes drifting to the side. He watched a few birds hop around on the ground, pecking at the crumbs of left over bread. Maybe this would...spice up his life a little, he sure needed something to make it feel like it was going somewhere. Screw it - why not? A very impulsive decision, very out of character for him, he would admit, but like Roman said, this offer wouldn't come around whenever he wanted it to - he was a teen, also, so it wouldn't have too many repercussions. Worse comes to shove, they call the whole thing off.

"Sure" he finally agreed, "why not?"

Not too long later the two boys were sitting at a picnic table Roman had led them to. It was cut off from view, so they could be recluse while discussing their plan.

"I suppose I should tell you what my life at home is like - correct? So you know how exactly to act" Logan began, letting his book rest beside his arms. Roman nodded eagerly, gesturing for him to start. "Well, I have two dads-" not even one sentence finished and Roman was already cutting him off with a large intake of air and glittering eyes.

"Two dads!? This is absolutely marvellous! Oh, how I've always wanted to know what that was like!" He gushed, "anyway, enough from me, do carry on!"

Logan was silent for a few moments, trying to understand the boy before him, eventually he carried on. "My dad - Patton - is more the affectionate type. He adores to give out hugs, compliments, dad-like gestures, and...the puns" Logan visibly shuddered a little. "Although he is not the smartest when it comes to 'school-smarts' he is very observant when it comes to people. He can understand my emotions before I can - whether or not I am sad, happy, excited, nervous, he knows. To anyone else, I assume it would be quite annoying - to me, I favour it. Emotions are not my forte, so having someone like him really does help me understand people in a way I cannot fathom on my own" he looked a little apologetic after his long rant, but Roman shook his head, grinning.

"He sounds wonderful! Let's hope he won't see through my disguise" Roman winked, leaning on the table. Logan nodded, humming. "I still cannot believe we are doing this..." he murmured, pushing his tie up slightly, closer to his throat.

"Isn't it exciting!?" He giggled, sitting up on his legs. "I suppose. Anyway, my father - Virgil - is quite the opposite. I do not call him by his title, rather than by his name. We both feel more comfortable with it. He is quite a reclusive type, an introvert, unfortunately he has dealt with anxiety all his life - but Patton is his rock, figuratively, helping him stay grounded during an attack, or when his cognitive distortions become too much" Roman cocked his head in confusion.

"Cog-who now?"

Logan snorted. "Cognitive distortions. To put it simply; the 'what ifs' someone were to create in their mind while in a nerve-wracking situation"

"Ooo! I didn't know it had a name!" Roman hummed, eyes sparkling. "Yes, anyway, Virgil - like Patton - can quite easily detect when a person is acting off. If we want to get through these two weeks, you must act exactly like me - no slip ups" Logan demanded in a stern tone. Roman held his hands up, looking smug as he replied; "Do not worry, specs! I am the best actor in our school, I think I can pull this off"

"...right" Logan replied, obviously not believing him. He noticed the offended expression, but carried on without a second word on the matter. "I spent most of my time either in my room or office - yes, office" he clarified when he watched Roman's jaw slack slightly. "I would beg for you to not try and complete any work on my desk. I will let you use my computer, but I would prefer if you made a new account and used that to...watch YouTube, or play games, or whatever it is you do in your spare time" Roman nodded in agreement. He wasn't going to search through his work, anyhow. Not doing work? Didn't need to tell him twice.

"I...think that is all. Affection is never something I do on the regular, but if I were to hug Patton it would improve the rest of his day, so I do tend to hug him more often. Do not hug Virgil, if you do, they will know something is up. I suppose you can say me hugging Virgil is code for something is wrong, as I have a harder time making my emotions clear"

"Awh, that is adorable!" Roman cooed. "I promise to not hug Virgil" Roman swore, holding a hand over his heart as he did. "Hm" Logan tilted his head, "and lose the dramatic act. I am not - and never will be - one for eccentrics. In fact, try to act like me" Logan gestured, watching Roman straighten up his back, brush a hand through his hair, and speak;

"A fancy way to say hello..." he pondered for a moment, when he thought of one he dropped his grin, "Salutations. I am a nerd" he spoke in a robotic tone, even if he was quite good, it still made Logan stare at him blankly as he chuckled.

"Oh, come on! Such a stick in the mud" Roman sighed, starting again. "Salutations. I am Logan, and I will be your teacher this semester"

"Teacher?" Logan asked in confusion, scrunching up his face. "I would much rather be a professor"

Roman groaned over dramatically, "Salutations. I am Logan, and I will be your professor for this subject" Logan nudged his glasses up his face, slowly nodding. "Not perfect, but like you said - you are quite a good actor" this made Roman beam once more, shifting in his seat to return back to his slumped, comfortable position.

"So, act like a nerd, hug Patton, avoid Virgil, stay in room all day...I think I have you perfected!" He clapped, "now, onto me" he continued before Logan could even get a vowel in. "My life at home is...something" he shrugged lightly, "you can act however you want - no one will notice! My parents are quite neglectful towards me, I suppose that's what I get for being the eldest sibling" Roman chuckled, not at all looking phased, even as he explained his not-so-great life at home. Logan leaned on the table, interested.

"I have six siblings - Marshall, Annie, Tristan, Belle, Lara, Venus. Marshall is the second oldest, he is fourteen and absolutely adores video games! So, you won't have to worry about bumping into him. Annie and Tristan are eleven, they are twins, and...practically hate each other in every way possible! If there is an argument in the house, it was most certainly caused by them - sorry about that in advance" he chuckled, tapping the wooden table awkwardly. "Belle is nine years old and causes quite the ruckus around the house, she puts my parents through hell, from her screaming, to her crying, sometimes I really wish I had the option to close my ears like I could close my eyes - nevertheless, around strangers she is a sweetheart!" Roman said, as if that trait made everything else about her justifiable.

"Lara is five, she is very shy, and sticks around Dad nearly all the time. She has recently started school, which as brought her out of her shell - which is brilliant! She will be no trouble at all. And last, but not least, Venus. She is still a baby, so most of my parents' attention will be on her. I will admit I used to accumulate a lot of attention when I was a child, but as soon as I turned ten I became invisible - you're lucky you're an only child" maybe if Logan was better at reading emotions, he would see the flicker of sadness spread across Roman's eyes, but all he could see was his blinding, happy smile, so he took it as everything was okay.

"My parents are called Venessa and Phineas - I call them their names, never their titles - they tend to focus more on the younglings, I swear I could vanish for a year and they wouldn't notice" Roman chuckled, clearing his throat a few moments later. "All you have to do is act like me for the bare minimum and no one will notice a thing" Logan nodded slowly, maybe living Roman's life wouldn't be so bad. He is used to getting a lot of attention from Patton, so this break of sorts might help him relax and find himself again.

They agreed to meet up after school tomorrow to start their official two weeks - although, throughout the school day they did end up hanging out. Roman explained his friends weren't the type of good friends, really. When hanging out with them, they were great, but if you were to vanish, they wouldn't care. Logan did feel bad for the boy, he made it seem like he had no one. Maybe he exaggerated about his life at home - Logan was sure everything was fine.

"Let's change in the bathroom" Roman smirked, rushing towards the rooms once the last bell rang throughout the school. Logan followed behind, shutting himself in the cubical beside Roman's. "So" Roman began, dropping his shirt onto Logan's head from over the wall. The glasses-wearing boy flinched, as he hadn't expected it, but tugged off his tie and own shirt to hand to Roman as he put on his clothes. They were a little bigger on him - due to Roman's muscles stretching them out - but other than that it fit perfectly. "Did you say I can spend my time in your room while eating?"

"Yes - that has become a usual occurrence. When I do eat with my parents, they like to question about my day - and I would much rather not want to imagine you try and come up with what you think my day-to-day activities consist of" as he spoke, the two swapped jeans and not too long later they were out the cubicles and checking the other out.

"Got it, eat in your room" Roman smirked, using water from the sink to wash out the gel from Logan's hair. He screwed his face up in distaste, but let it happen. Drying his hair under the hand dryer, he watched Roman use his gel to perfect the hairstyle Logan wore daily, Logan was surprised he was able to nail it without his help. It was lucky they had such similar hair and eye colours.

"I bought these" Roman held up a pair of glasses. They had glass in them, luckily, but it was fake, as Roman's vision wasn't impaired like Logan's. "And I have these" Logan held up a box of contact lenses and sighed - how he hated these things. While pressing them into his eyes, Roman swapped all his belongings in their bags, picking up Logan's bag once he had finished.

"I think we're done" he grinned, standing in the mirror next to Logan who put the contacts into his bag, blinking a few times. "I must admit, we look...exactly like the other" Roman giggled lightly, dancing across the floor to the bathroom door.

"Now, remember, text me if there's an emergency!" Roman called, and he was gone, leaving Logan to carry Roman's bag - full of his stuff - to his car and drive to the address he was given. He hoped there wouldn't be an emergency on the first day - how awkward would it be if he found out someone had died before Roman? That would be terrible.

Parking in the driveway - like Roman told him to - he got out Roman's car and locked the doors, staring at the three-story house (not counting the attic) hesitantly. This was definitely an experience he would never forget. Gulping down his nerves, he crossed the front yard and used the keys Roman had given him to get inside.

Roman had told him usually he was first to arrive home, but due to the fact they spent so much time in the school's bathrooms, everyone had gotten here before him. And now he understood what Roman meant about the yelling, screeching and arguing. As soon as the front door was open his ears were bombarded with the yells from two kids who were standing in the rather large foyer, fighting and screaming while their mother - Venessa - tried to pull them apart.

Closing the door, he hurried over, grabbing the boy - Tristan, as he remembered - which allowed Venessa to hold Annie. It was a struggle, as the two were clawing against the person who held them back to get to each other, but Phineas came without a moment to spare and locked the two in their separate rooms.

"Thank you, Hun" Venessa sighed, Logan went to respond but paused when he realised she was talking to her husband. "Hello Venessa, Phineas" Logan greeted, trying his hardest to act like Roman, but that wasn't believe at all. He was still stiff, and sounded too monotonous for the boisterous boy he had gotten to know over the span of two days.

Although, like Roman stated, they didn't even notice - in fact, they didn't reply! Instead, they ventured down the stairs without giving Logan so much as a glance. The boy stood on the stairs balcony for a moment, never before had his own parents ignored him like that, so it was quite new and...strangely, it hurt. Which was quite weird, and unsettling.

"Roman!" He heard a whine from behind him. Spinning around, he noticed it was Belle, the nine year old who screamed all the time. "Make me a sandwich!" She ordered, stomping her foot afterwards. A sandwich? That didn't seem like too much hassle. "Okay, what kind of sandwich?" When he agreed, Belle stared at him in surprise, which made him feel like he answered wrong, but she beamed and grabbed his hand, tugging him down the stairs.

"I want ham, and cheese, and ketchup, and crisps! And orange juice! And a straw! And my Dora the Explora plate! And the Micky Mouse cup!" She didn't even add a Please before she was scurrying off into the living room. When Logan said he always wanted siblings, he realised he probably should take that back. Although, he still wanted one his age - having a brother, or sister, the same age as him just seemed like...something that would make his life complete.

He busied himself in the kitchen, making sure to perfect all her requests before entering the living room, realising it was quite a mess. There was a baby in the crib pressed to the wall, toys littered the stained carpet, hanging from the wall was a tv playing a rather loud episode of Peppa pig, and on the other section of the couch - the one Belle wasn't sitting on - was a younger girl sucking her thumb and twirling a strand of hair through her fingers. Logan assumed that was Lara.

"Here you go, Belle" Logan handed her the stuff she asked for, and she squealed, ordering him to move out of the way before tucking into her food. Logan rolled his eyes and left the room to venture upstairs where he saw a boy older than the other siblings. This must be Marshall. He had just left the bathroom and was rushing up the second staircase back to his room. When he spotted 'Roman', he sent the boy a small wave, disappearing afterwards.

Logan ignored the screams from Tristan and Annie, finding his room on the third story. The door was covered with old paintings from what he assumed Roman did as a child. The room was moderately big, with a television and a few different consoles. He also had his own computer, and a large walk-in closet full of different clothes and many vast outfits Logan assumed was only used in his plays.

Sitting on the double bed, he sighed and flopped back to stare at the canopy. These two weeks were going to be something else...

Meanwhile, a few streets over, Roman parked Logan's car in his driveway, grinning at the two story house. For two weeks he was about to have some peace and quiet in his home - how wonderful. He hasn't had that in years! Collecting his things, he opened the front door, shoulders dropping in relief when he wasn't smacked in the face by screams and yells from the younger children.

"Hey, Kiddo!" He heard a fatherly voice call down the hallway. Smiling, he closed the door, but before entering the kitchen he suddenly remembered who he was pretending to be. Straightening his posture, he dropped the smile and walked in, spotting a man dressed in a baby blue top with a cardigan wrapped around his shoulders at a counter, cutting up some veg. Across the room sat another man at a table, wearing black and purple clothing while scrolling on his phone.

"Salutations, Dad" Roman nodded curtly at Patton who sent him a little wave. So far so good. "What are you cooking?" Roman decided to ask, walking over and standing beside the counter like Patton. "Oh! Spaghetti bolognese!" He replied, gesturing to the pot of pasta and bubbling sauce.

"Ah...wonderful" Roman nodded, cringing slightly. Is that something Logan would say? Either way, Patton didn't seem to notice, only humming a familiar tune and pouring some things into the sauce. "How was your day at school?" Patton turned to his son once again, and Roman hesitated for a moment - not because he had to think about what Logan's response would be, but because this was the first time someone had asked him this question in years.

Of course, it wasn't directed at him, technically, but weirdly he felt the sudden urge to cry.

"It was satisfactory" Roman replied, "although, I was nearly given a detention" Roman decided to dramatise this a little. "What? Why?" Patton worried, this statement even making Virgil look up and tilt his head. "Some teachers do not like to be corrected" Roman shrugged in response, relaxing when Patton giggled and Virgil rolled his eyes fondly.

"Hm, I wonder why" the darkly dressed boy murmured in response.

"I think I will head upstairs and do some work" Roman nodded slightly, but before he left he walked over to Patton and gave him a hug. The man giggled in surprise, but hugged back just as tight. "I love you, Logy" he murmured into his hair, and Roman felt himself melt.

"As do I" Roman murmured in response, hugging him for a few seconds longer before sending him a brief, tight-lipped smile and heading upstairs to Logan's room. At least, when he found it.

Ten minutes of searching later he was able to flop onto Logan's bed and sigh out contently. This was the first time he had had a conversation with... "his" parents in a long time...and they weren't even his own. At this point, he felt blessed - like the luckiest boy alive. These two weeks were going to be the greatest if he is able to keep up this act, truthfully he doesn't know if he would want it to end...

—

Part two coming to a cinema near you

11:49pm