"So about tonight..." Harry trails off while putting the milk back in the fridge. I watch as I can see his muscles move under his shirt. He catches me staring and chuckles as I blush looking away. 

To clarify, I don't like Harry. I do think he's handsome but it's far too soon for me to even start thinking about someone else when Niall still consumes my thoughts. 

"Yeah?" I question popping a cheerio in my mouth. 

"Um well where would you like to go?" He asks. I honestly don't know what I want to do. If I was with Niall, I would have him order pizza and just watch a movie and cuddle all night, but thinks aren't that simple. 

"Um I don't know...there's this diner just down the road. We can get a burger or something" I shrug a he nods. 

"Okay that sounds cool" he smiles. "Is Emilia coming?" My heart stops, he doesn't know...

"She can't" my heart drops. "If any of the town elders see me with her I can get shamed...Liam's carreer could be over, none of this can be exposed" I look away from him and sigh. 

"Oh" he pauses. "None of that should matter to you...she's your daughter but I also get it" he sighs.

 "How?" 

"Well I know you want her to have a normal life but this isn't normal Kate. She can't just say behind a door, she needs you" I know deep down he's right but I can't admit it to myself. I'm scared. I'm really fucking scared. I've told Niall about Emilia and he didn't accept her, I'm afraid no one will. 

"I know" I say silently rubbing my hands over my face. 

"Hey you'll get through it" he smiles rubbing my back. "Well I'm gonna get going I have to run a few errands before dinner" 

"While your out would you mind going to the community college? I was supposed to pick up my schedule" I said. I'm actually quite proud that I've decided to go to college. I'm doing this for Emilia, because I know she deserves something better than this. We both need a fresh new start. My next step is finding a job and hopefully getting an apartment. 

"Okay anything else?" 

"Nope" I reply, popping the p. 

-

I text harry to tell him I'm going back home. I really don't want to but I have no choice, I have nothing to wear and I sure can't prance around town in a tee shirt and underwear. 

Just as I am about to leave my aunt calls for me. Once I reach her she starts grabbing her things frantically. 

"Dear can you please take Emilia? I really have to go" she says looking at me with nervous eyes. 

"Why what's wrong?" I ask. 

"Well work just called and they need me to go to Dublin" she sighs. "I'm really sorry Caitriona"

"its okay" I nod as she hugs me.

"Are you sure?" She hugs me harder. 

"Yeah we'll be fine. You better get going" I pat her as she scurries out the door with her suitcase in hand. I take a deep breath, trying to keep in a sob but it doesn't help. I break down in the middle of that small hallway. 

I feel so lost, it's so hard being a single parent and it feels like everything is losing control. I feel like everyone around me is slowly picking at my walls, just waiting for me to finally break. I can't break, I can't...do this for Emilia. 

"Mummy?" My daughter walks out of her room. "Are you okay?" She slowly takes my hand in hers and squeezes lightly. 

"Yeah I'm fine princess" I sigh. "Hey guess what? were going home! you get to see Uncle Aedan and Nana" I smile wiping my face free of the tears. She starts jumping around and letting out an excited squeal. 

"Yay!" I smile at her happiness. 

-

Once we pull up into the drive way I take Emilia out of her car seat and carry her into my arms. I carry her to the front door and knock lightly. I feel like my whole world stops as my mom opens the door. 

"Hi sweetie!" She says to Emilia...I think. She takes her in the house as I shut the door. I look around and I see Aedan no where to be found. I enter the kitchen and see my Mum and Emilia already making cookies. 

"Mum" I sigh. 

"Aye don't Mum me. This is a Nana and granddaughter tradition" she laughs. She laughed? what?

"Okay" I chuckled leaning against the counter. 

"So I've heard from your brother your dating Niall now" she raises an eyebrow. 

"Yeah well it's complicated" I cross my arms. 

"Well I can tell that Kate, your brother hasn't come out of his room since he went to check up on ya" she says stirring the batter. Did Aedan not tell her what's going on? Did he just tell her that Niall and I are together?

"He's mad isn't he?" I question even though I know the answer. 

"Beyond mad dear" she sighs as Emilia dips her finger in the batter while my Mum isn't looking. 

"Oh" is all I can say. I know he's mad, he's spent the whole summer with his best friend he's missed for years and now he's with me...well was. 

"How about you check on him? It's okay I've got Emilia" she smiles as I slip into the hallway. I really don't want to talk to him, I'm afraid of what he would say to me. Once I reach the top of the stairs, I take a deep breath as I walk towards his room. 

"Aedan?" I knock opening his door slightly. 

"Go away" he groans. 

"I really need to talk to you" I say taking a seat on his bed. 

"I don't care. Get out" 

"Just hear me out okay?" I bite my lip. Aedan and I have always been really close and he's only been mad at me once...until now. "I really need to talk to someone right now" I sigh and he sits up and looks at me.

"Fine" he crosses his arms. 

"Okay so I know Niall is your best friend and I am so sorry for everything. I knew I should've told you but I didn't want to ruin what you two have" I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. 

"Had Caitriona...Harry told me everything" his voice sounds furious...what did Niall do?

"What do you mean?" 

"He pushed you! I mean have you looked at yourself in the mirror Kate? Look at these bruises! You might have a concussion...have you even gone to go get yourself checked out?" He's angry..beyond angry.

"No but..." I trail off looking at my arms...covered in bruises. How didn't I notice? 

"Do you know what else he did Kate? Do you?!" He says pulling at the roots of his hair. 

"What? What did he do Aedan?" I ask as he starts to cry a little...Aedan never cries. Oh no. My head can't stop spinning, I don't know what to think right now. 

"It was a bet...all of it!" He says kicking over his nightstand. "I hate him so much!" He slams his door open and leaves the room as my heart falls out of my chest.

The poem, the kisses, everything was a lie. 

It doesn't matter to me what the bet was about, I think I already know. I got used by the person I've loved the most and he betrayed me, betrayed my trust. Just when I thought my walls couldn't be broken anymore they finally broke to reveal a small fragile girl. How could he do this to me? He knew I couldn't trust anyone and I let him in so fast...

That's why he left, he never loved me.

I burst into sobs and I feel like I want to punch something but I don't. 

He never loved you it's all a lie...

You should've known...

 I race to my room and shut the door. I lie down on my bed and just cry. When I look up I see our cups from the hot chocolate we had...the gummy bear wrappers...the game...and his shirt. I take that stupid shirt and cut it up into piece with a pair of scissors and toss it out my window. It didn't feel as good as I thought it would and it made me even more angry. 

But with all the anger I had ounced inside of me I opened my closet and picked out the most revealing dress I owned. I didn't like wearing it but I didn't care. I needed to make him jealous. 

//

Holy damn I can't take this...

-ily xx