A/N: I wrote this while I was half asleep, so please do not judge on any errors.

{Caitriona}

I got out of the of the shower and pulled his shirt that he left on the floor on and I followed him. I instantly regretted my words. 

"Niall!" I called out after him and ran downstairs, except I couldn't believe who was standing in the front door, Liam. 

"why is Liam..Liam I thought you were in the UK? Why are you in Mulligar?" Niall says. 

"Why is she wearing your shirt?" Liam adds, pointing at me. 

"I cant... I have to go" Niall says leaving. 

"Wait-" But he was gone. "Why are you here?"

"So why exactly are you wearing his shirt?" Liam crosses his arms. 

"Doesnt matter. Why are you here?" I roll my eyes. 

"Oh I don't know Kate, I just came to see if you had any diapers for our daughter and I see Niall with no shirt on, and you with it on. You are both soaking wet ! so really, my mind is wandering Katie" He huffs. 

"Look were not together so please stop being an arse, you cant control me" I cross my arms. "And yes I have diapers. I'll give you a few packs"

"I know were not together, but i want to be at some point" Liam says. 

"Well its gonna take some time for me, right now I like Niall and I want to see where things go" I pause, as he looks sad. "Can you be okay with that?"

"Yeah of course, I understand" He nods. 

"Just because were not together doesn't mean you're not a great father..you are" I grab his hand and squeeze it. No one knows how hard it is co-parenting, its really tough. 

"You're a fantastic mother Katie" he pauses giving me a hug. "I'm sorry for not being there for you and Emilia" he backs away, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I love both of you very much"

"We love you too Liam" I smile, "I really appreciate what you do for her"

"Thank you, and I do too" he smiles. "Im gonna go, and thanks for the Diapers" I nod as he leaves. 

Somehow after all of this, I still feel trapped. I finally realize now that even through all of my mistakes there are good ones, and somehow in this tangled up mess Niall is one of them. 

I shouldn't have said the things I said, but I also had a good reason to say them. I pointed out the flaws of our relationship, and I saw that we are both entirely different types of people. Niall is a sweet, well rounded guy and I am rebellious, and selfish. So in the end we wouldn't work out.

Being the selfish person I am, I want him to hate me, I mean REALLY hate me. I want him to see that in his perfect world I wouldn't fit. I am so practically in love with him that I want him to stay away from me at all costs so I can't hurt him again. 

Even though I'll hurt him more anyway.

As I start to process all of this, it makes me think about my future. Maybe going to the community college would be good for me. It may help me weigh out my options about how I want Emilia to spend the rest of her childhood. I don't want her to live with my aunt for much longer, she deserves to be with her mother. 

Thinking of Emilia makes me think of how maybe Niall would like her. I know he would like her, she reminds me of him a little. The way she smiles, her giggle definitely reminds me of him. The way she has this caring personality automatically reminds me of him. 

I shake my head to get rid of that thought. But how cute would it be to see Niall push her on a swing. Or how cute would it be to see him slide down a slide with her. For him to be there for her as a dad, that would be amazing.

One can only imagine right?

As I was so deep in thought, I barely recognize myself driving out to the community college. Once I arrive I head inside. I spent almost two hours applying, signing paperwork, making payment plans, and making my schedule. 

I think applying into this college might actually be a good thing for me. I won't be at home most the day anymore, I will actually have a schedule. I won't have to worry about Niall trying to make plans with me because I will be too busy. I just really need to focus on my future now, my future with my daughter. 

I start thinking about what schools she may go to around Mullingar. I want her to go to good schools and get a good education. I want her to be able to broaden her horizon with whatever she desires to do with her life.

After two excruciating hours on campus, I hop into my brother's car and drive back home. That's another thing I need a car an actual car. Once I get home I start to make a list of things that I need.

-a car

-books

-a job

-an apartment

After I write the list, I start to think if my priorities as a parent. In my opinion, I haven't been a very good one. I want to strive to do better for her, only for her. I shouldn't be focusing on guys like Niall who I just met almost two weeks ago. As this thought crosses my mind it make me think about how my birthday is less then 4 days away, it's the same night as the tractor durby. 

I know for a fact Ronan wants me to go, but I don't think I'll go because Niall is gonna be there. I really need to stop thinking about Niall every time I think about something I'm about to do, it not healthy. 

As I sit in my room I take off my make up, change into pajamas, and pull my hair into a messy bun. I take out my planner and begin to plan out the next few days, as it begins to pour heavily outside. I quickly reach for the curtains pulling them shut as I hear loud thumps at my door. Once I hear the sound, my whole body Jumps, leaving the hairs on my neck standing up.

I slowly plod downstairs, reaching the door. The banging only gets louder and louder as I turn the door handle. I am taken back by Niall's appearance and the smell of alcohol evident his breath. I back up slightly as he walks inside. My mouth gapes at the deep gashes to his head and knuckles. I lead Niall to the kitchen by his arm, as I turn on the water and begin aiding his wounds. 

He looks up into my eyes, and I look away avoiding them as I watch him study my face. He studies my every move, confusing me more and more. I want to bombard him with questions, but I bring myself to not to. 

"We can talk about this later" he says, as if he's reading my mind. I sigh as I wipe the blood from his face with a cloth. 

//

Hope you liked it

New update soon!

As always, 

- ily xx