Questions from me, to you!

1. Do you have a favorite loop? If so, which one and why?

2. Which loop do you think has the best dynamic between Eren and [Name]?

3. Is there any loop that you think could have gone differently?

4. Which loop do you think [Name] was messiest? Where Eren was messiest?

5. I love asking this question: did this fic make you think of any other media (songs, books, movies, etc)? If so, drop them!

Fun facts:

• Dialogue and sentences scattered involve words repeating. For example, in Loop Four, Eren says "If you'd let me" about how he'd do anything for her, and [Name] repeats it out of mockery to show how little she took his love seriously at first. In Loop Six, [Name] says "I know that, you suicidal idiot" thrice. There are a lot more if you can spot them. This is to show how repetitive everything is and you are unconsciously repeating everything against your own will. One huge example: "I love you, I love you, I love you." As the reader, it also subconsciously shows you how the redundancy drives [Name] mad.

• One major inspiration for this fanfic was the video game Life Is Strange, which is also one of Hajime Isayama's favorite video games, and his inspirations for Attack on Titan, specifically in the Midnight Sun episode (which is also my personal favorite episode).

Isayama wrote in his 2016 blog post, "In 'Life is Strange', the main character finds out that every time she rewinds time, her every choice affects her life in a butterfly effect. The unbearable losses and partings in our lives. The story is about whether or not we can accept them. It was so good! A masterpiece!"

[Spoiler] At the end of Life Is Strange, the main character has to choose between saving her best friend (whom she is in love with) or saving their home from destruction.

• Your nickname for Eren, "Ren", has meaning. It means "hope a for good ending". It is also a kind of bird.

• The Hydra constellation

In Greek mythology, Heracles performed twelve labors that seemed impossible to overcome, one task being to slay the Hydra. [Name] lived through twelve difficult lives.

The Hydra was a monster with nine heads that grow back every time it is cut off. The 9th loop is the turning point when [Name] finally begins to change. The thirteenth life is when things finally work out in her favor.

The 13th star in the sky in the Hydra constellation is the Alphard star, a star that represents death that could have been preventable. Lack of self control, revolting deeds, and a sudden death by drowning, poison or asphyxiation. All of which poor [Name] had gone through but were ultimately products of her own doing.

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Yes, your rejections were frustrating. Like please, just tell him you love him! [Name]'s biggest flaw is allowing regret to swallow her up. She thinks that she's only making Eren's life worse. If you go back and observe her behavior in little detail like in conversation, you will see that she often cannot bring herself to say things because she is so internally negative and self-deprecating. Moreover, she is fated to reject Eren.

This is because deeply regrets Eren's death in Loop One, as shown in the interlude. I'd say she's even quite cowardly for it, being afraid of what she desires the most, and letting it destroy her repeatedly until she finally learns to take control of her own life. All she had to do was to take a chance. I think that is a pretty hard thing to do.

Someone once wrote on my message board saying that [Name]'s behavior is a metaphor for how depressed people cannot wrap their minds around the idea that they are deserving of love. That is definitely the correct interpretation. Her regret is extremely strong, and as the loops go by, her self-loathing grows until it clouds her judgment.

Love is the central driving force in Thirteen. Everything that happens is because of love.

At the ending, you were under the impression that you were the one ruining everything because of the actions you chose to do, but the truth is, you were living under the illusion of free choice. There was no other way for you to save Eren other than living through all thirteen lives, because only through the convergence of the thirteen realities (which is triggered by you finally admitting that you love Eren which causes a rip in time and space) were you able to eliminate the Titans. You had to go through everything to free him. You were trapped and imprisoned in the loop of fate, just like Eren.

You had no choice but to reject him and die over and over again, otherwise, you would not be in Thirteen where you could save him. This is the tragedy about Eren—he thinks he has a choice, but he does not. He is not free. Neither are you, but you eventually break out of your self-imprisonment at Thirteen and end the loop.

Thank you for reading!