All I dream about is being back with Ramin. I get woken up by HIM. He shakes me awake.

"Come on Sierra. It's time to get up." Tam orders. I shakily stand up. He puts his arm around my waist and walks me downstairs. I shake at his contact. I cannot stand it.

"After breakfast, how does a walk in the park sound?" He asks lovingly. I just nod. He grabs my chin.

"Words sweetheart."

"Yes.....it sounds perfect." I reply shakily. He smiles and pulls a chair out for me. I sit down not wanting to make him angry.

"I made some pancakes." He says putting a plate down in front of me. I push it away.

"I'm not hungry."

"You will eat Sierra." He pushes the plate back in front of me. I push it away again. He takes my hands and and forcefully puts them in my lap. He grabs the plate and cuts a pancake up. He holds a bite in front of my mouth. I shake my head. I will not let him feed me when I am not hungry.

"Sierra Marjory Boggess.......you will eat." He growls.

"No." I spit out through clenched teeth. He throws the fork back down on the plate and stands. I shake and move away from him the best I can. I start whimpering. His face softens.

"Sierra......don't cry....I'm sorry. I just want you to be healthy."

I shake harder. "P-please.....I-I'm sorry.......T-Tam....."

"I'm not going to hurt you." He says picking me up. He has me bridal style. I sigh on the inside but I keep trying to not have a panic attack in his arms.

"Please.....p-put me d-down......." I beg. Tam does and I scoot away from him. I start taking deep breaths.

"Sierra?"

"Don't Tam.......I'm having a panic attack...." I push him away.

"How long have you had these?"

"Ever since that night......."

He sighs. "I'm sorry darling......I didn't mean it....I haven't had a drink since....."

I stop shaking as much as I calm down. Tam slowly moves closer.

"I won't hurt you Sierra......I promise I won't. I'm a changed man."

"But I don't love you anymore!" I yell at him. He stops cold and looks hurt.

"I love Ramin!"

His eyes turn cold. He takes my arms and puts me back in my room with the plate of pancakes.

"I want those gone by the time I get back." He says shutting the door. I hear the front door open and slam. I grab the cold pancakes and throw them in the trash and put other things on top of them. I will not eat anything he fixes unless I watch him do it. I lay on the bed and stare at the ceiling. After awhile I stand up and start doing my vocal exercises. I know I have to keep doing them even though I'm out of therapy. I hear the door slam. I keep singing because I'm in the middle of my highest scale. Tam opens the door with a lustful look. I stop in the middle of the note.

"Sing." He growls. I quickly start in the same place. He's scaring me badly. Tam moves closer to me. I shake as I sing. I reach my highest note and get cut off by his lips on mine. I squeal and pull away from him. Tam huffs and grabs my hands and pulls me closer.

"Tam! Get off me!!"

He puts his hands on my waist. I try and get away from him. His grip is crushing.

"Tam.....you're hurting me." I whimper. He kisses me again and his grip loosens slightly. I cry. I feel like I'm betraying Ramin by letting him kiss me.

'I'm sorry my Ramin......' I think as Tam holds me closer. He walks around the room to find the bed. I'm crying harder.

'I'm so sorry Ram.......I'm so sorry.......' I cry in my head.