his mind was blank.

it was deserted.

like his heart.

***

Percy Jackson felt absolutely hopeless.

He knew the facts. Nico di Angelo was in love with Will Solace. And he couldn't force love apart. Well, he couldn't, but someone else could... Percy pushed that thought out of his head. Just, get over him. Thats the only thing I can do. Percy thought. They were happy, and that is all that matters.

Percy sluggishly stumbled out of bed and closed the blinds. To be honest, he didn't really feel the best today. Like, mentally. "Chiron won't mind if I skip ONE day of lessons," he decided. He wandered to the bathroom and splashed ice cold water on his face. It cleared up his fuzzy eyesight, but not his groggy mind.

He walked back the the main part of the cabin and stood in front of a large body length mirror. He stood and stared at himself for a while, thinking. Thinking about random things. Like the fact that today was a beautiful day. And how he felt like he was constantly drowning. How there was a weight in his chest. Percy sighed and turned back to his bed. He laid down and closed his eyes in an attempt to drown out his reckless mind.

It didn't work.

Nico cluttered his mind. Soon, Nico and Will cluttered his mind.

Images of them smiling, them laughing, them kissing, them hugging, how the stared at each other, how much they cared for one another. He would never find someone who cared about him like they care about each other. Sure, in the past he had Annabeth. But, now she won't even talk to him.

He realized that after he broke up with her, the only people that really talk to him are Nico and Will. Of course, people around camp still greeted him, waved at him, etc. But no one had straight up conversations with him anymore, except the two boys. He found that quite odd.

Percy fidgeted with his hands. He soon came to realize that his plan of laying on the bed and doing nothing would just not work for him. It was just to boring. So, after debating for a split second in his head, he decided to get up. He got up, put on a blue shirts and some black jeans, and walked outside. He passed the other cabins, and passed the dining pavilion, where the others where eating. He passed the infirmary, and the big house. He went by the woods, and by the lake, and found himself at the beach. He sat down, breathed in the salty air, and started to, for some reason, cry.

He cried for a few reasons. He cried because ehe felt guilty about leaving Annabeth. He cried because he missed his mother, who he could hardly ever visit. He cried over the fact that he was born into this horrible world, filled with monsters. Isn't it odd, how the worst type of monster, can look like you?

A monster didn't need to have sharp teeth and a tail. A monster didn't need talons and poison. All something needed to be a monster was bad intentions. Evil, horrific, bad intentions. Gabe was a monster. And Percy couldn't help but feel that maybe, just maybe, he was a monster too. He remembered how he had tried to kill a goddess with her own tears and poison. He remembered Annabeth's face as she cried for him to stop.

Did that make him a monster? Did all the times he curse the gods make him a monster? Was Percy Jackson, savior of the world, a horrifying, evil monster?

He can't be sure anymore.

......................................................................

okay, kinda random filler chapter thing.

a filler chapter already. wow.

yeah, I know I suck.

Anyway, I have writers block. For a lot of my stories, tbh. But I knew I needed to update them so here I am.

Okay bye