Prince's worrisome attitude eventually got the best of me and I started to lightly panic about the possibility of being pregnant. I started backtracking about when I specifically could have slipped up. I know I fucked up earlier in August when I forgot my birth control at home when I went to California. The morning of my flight to London, I was so scatter-brained that I forgot to take it. But I know I took it sometime between when I landed and the following day, and I took it the morning after me and Prince slipped up so I'm good, right?

Calling my OBGYN, she told me the exact opposite of what I wanted to here. "Jasmin, even on birth control you should still be practicing safe sex. You said yourself you missed quite a few days of your pill. If you think theres a chance you might be pregnant, you should come in for a pregnancy test." Yeah, right.

The more I tried to push my worries aside, they kept resurfacing. One night when I went to meet up with P at his Lake Minnetonka house, I had no idea what I was walking into. Even after we had protected sex, I could tell something was weighing on his conscious as we laid in silence. Retracting his arm from around my waist, he pulled back the sheer drapes of the canopy bed and walked into the bathroom. Hearing the sound of a drawer closing, he walked back towards the bed with a box of pregnancy tests in his hand.

"Jazz, I know you said you were a hundred percent sure. But can you just at least think about taking a pregnancy test?"

I sat up so fast in bed, I felt a little dizzy for a second. "P, I'm a thousand percent sure I'm not pregnant. When I was pregnant with Noah, I was miserable at least four weeks in. I feel fine." Crawling to the edge of the bed, I sat up on my knees as I caressed the side of his face. "Baby, I understand you're worried, but I'm not taking the pregnancy test. End of discussion."

When I got home the next morning, to my surprise I found the same box of tests stuffed in the bottom of my overnight bag. Throwing the box in the bathroom cabinet to collect dust, my prayers were eventually answered.

Although I did experience some nausea and irritability, low and behold on October 17th, Mother Nature blessed me. Although it was a little heaver than usual, I still got my period nonetheless.

October 29, 1998

Strapping the Blues Clues sandals on Noah's tiny feet, my grandpa hobbled past me and out the front door. Not even a minute passed by before I heard him yell back at me from outside, "Jasmin! whose this scronny, high-yella boy with the heels?!"

Scrunching my face up in confusion, I jogged towards the door. "Grandpa, what are you talking ab—"

Walking up the driveway was Prince, dawned in an olive green sleeveless top, tight black slacks, and tan heels. He could've at least called first. I was praying that this was only a mirage, but grandpa repeated his question.

"Whose this scronny boy with the heels?"

I scolded him, "Pa Pa, be nice!"

Watching Prince stroll away from his car, my eyes darted to his noticeable dick print. Is it bad I wanted to jump his bones on the hood of his BMW? Looking like a whole snack, I thought back to how sexy he looked on his BET Tonight interview with Tavis Smiley a few days ago. The way he looked into the camera made my clit twitch.

The closer Prince got to the porch, I could see the intimidated expression on his face, but it soon softened as Noah ran to him. "Pwince!" Scooping him up into his warm embrace, Noah wrapped his little arms around P's neck. "Hey buddy! Whats it been three weeks? Guess what? I have a surprise for you."

Pulling back, Noah placed his hands on his chest and gave P a surprised look. "For me?!"

"Yeah buddy just for you. Now go stand by your mommy for a minute. Running back over to me, Noah jumped up and down shouting, "Mommy Pwince is here!"

As Prince stepped on the covered porch, we exchanged smiles before grandpa extended his hand out to Prince. "Alzo Payne, I'm Jasmin's grandfather. Who are you? The boyfriend or something?" Thankfully he has no clue who Prince is, I mean he's a 83 year old retired pastor from Houma, Louisiana for gods sake.

Firmly shaking his hand, "I guess you can say that sir, I am. My name's Prince."

Grandpa's strong southern accent was more pronounced the louder he became. "Prince? I used to know a mulatto fella named Prince down in New Orleans, boy he could play a mean sax! He any kin to you boy?"

"Uh, no sir I don't think so, although my parents are from Louisiana as well."

To my chagrin, grandpa asked the one question I hoped he wouldn't. "Boy, whats going on with the heels?", pointing his cane at them for emphasis.

"Pa Pa stop! Prince you really don't have to answer that."

Looking over his gold prescription glasses at Prince, he proceeded to interrogate him. "How old are you boy?"

"I just turned 40 sir."

For some reason, grandpa got a kick out of his answer and started laughing. "Boy, I can't even get mad at you, I'd be a whole hypocrite. My wife, her grandma, I got her by a whole 15 years. After I divorced my first wife back in '48, I saw this pretty little mulatto girl in the juke joint and swept her off her feet. Married her six months later, been my baby ever since. Just celebrated our 50th anniversary." Prince couldn't contain his smile as my grandpa recounted his cherished memories with my grandma. "I want you to do right by my grand baby. After all the mess she's been through in the last couple of years, I hope you are that saving grace. This angel right here deserves the world. You seem like a stand up guy."

A warm smile graced Prince's face. "Thank you sir, I really do care about your granddaughter. She means a lot to me and she doesn't even know it."

"Alright now! Let me get out of here, I need to run to the store." My grandpa can never just sit down and relax, he's always on the go. "Say you play golf? You watch football?"

"Sir, I don't play golf but I do watch football. How about them Vikings!"

Shaking Prince's hand again before climbing into his burgundy Cadillac Coupe DeVille, my grandpa says, "Boy you alright with me! Jasmin bring him by the house sometime! Oh and don't forget to go see your grandma, ya hear?"

----------------

Loading the last plate into the dishwasher, I peered over at Prince reading the new Barney book he got for Noah. It was so heartwarming to see the two of them together giggling and enjoying each others company.

Running my hands through Noah's soft curls, I felt like it was as good of a time as ever to tell him I wasn't pregnant. Even though overall I was happy about not being pregnant, watching the two of them bond made me sad that I wasn't giving him the one thing he wanted. Clearing my throat, Prince looked up from Noah. "So, umm, I got my period."

"So you're not—"

"I'm not pregnant." A wave of emotions hit me as I stared into his somber hazel eyes. "P, its for the best right?"

His gaze fell on Noah who was mesmerized by the glistening diamond pendant dangling around his neck. "A part of me wanted you to be." I didn't expect those words to ever come out of his mouth.

So many feelings flowed through my mind as I replayed what he had just said. I mainly felt confused about everything. Was he really serious? I had nothing more to say to add to the conversation so I changed the subject as fast as possible. "So...you want to watch a movie?"

-----------------

Of all movies, this man decided on Soul Food. I mean I have nothing against it, its just kind of slow and I want to punch cousin Faith in the throat. Soon after we popped the movie in, Noah fell asleep in his little recliner and I wasn't too far behind him. Its just something about laying my head in Prince's lap while he runs his delicate fingers along my scalp that makes me want to just sleep like a baby.

It pissed me off when his fingers halted movement when the scene of Malcolm fucking cousin Faith came on. His thigh muscles tensed and I heard him exhale. "In order for us to move forward, I need to be completely honest with you." Sitting up, I stared straight ahead, preparing myself for what was to come.

"Just lay it on me man, I'm used to disappointment."

He deeply exhaled again as he grabbed my hand. "Long before you came into my life, me and Morgan had a 'thing'. But this was years ago and she means nothing to me now." Snatching my hand away, I shifted in my seat. "I know. I knew from the moment I saw you two interact that there had to have been something more between y'all. The way y'all would look at each other and how she felt comfortable enough to just pop off so reckless at you, it was clear y'all had a past. Ray Charles could see that shit! Have you been with her since we met? Did you love her?"

"No, and hell no!" For a while I sat there trying to process everything, that was until I noticed him nervously inching closer. "So, are you mad?"

Yes. "Mad at what happened with y'all? No, it was before me. I'm just disappointed you didn't think about telling me this earlier, like before I started feeling some type of way towards you."

"I just want us to move past this." Lost for words, I just shook my head up and down and flashed him a fake smile. Even though I always had my suspicions about the two of them, it still felt like a punch in the gut to hear it confirmed.