A new face

𝙰𝙽𝙾𝚃𝙷𝙴𝚁 𝙱𝙾𝙳𝚈 𝙷𝙰𝚂 𝙱𝙴𝙴𝙽 𝙵𝙾𝚄𝙽𝙳. 

 𝙹𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝚊 𝚍𝚊𝚢 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝙻𝚊𝚞𝚛𝚎𝚗 𝙼𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚣'𝚜 𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚏𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍, 𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚜𝚙𝚘𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚒𝚗 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚊𝚋𝚊𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚍 𝚌𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚒𝚌 𝚒𝚗 ********* ***** ***. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚒𝚍𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚏𝚒𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝙻𝚞𝚌𝚊𝚜 𝙱𝚛𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚎. 

 𝙰𝚞𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚛𝚒𝚝𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚖𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝 𝚝𝚠𝚘 𝚟𝚒𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚜 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚗'𝚝 𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚑 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚘𝚕𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚕𝚘𝚘𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚖𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚞𝚜𝚙𝚎𝚌𝚝. 

 𝙵𝚊𝚖𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚎𝚜 𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚑𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚙𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚎𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚎𝚎𝚗𝚊𝚐𝚎𝚛𝚜 𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎.

S E S S I O N  5

I couldn't escape the fear of what I had almost considered, the horrifying idea of hurting Lindsey just to make her speak. The shame weighed heavily on me. I had to push through and do my job. I had to help Lindsey with her trauma and find a way to heal. It's the reason why I'm here from the start.

When morning arrived, I pushed myself for another session with Lindsey. I couldn't let this one end like the others, with nothing but silent staring and unanswered questions. I needed to break through the barrier that separated us, to reach her in a way that I hadn't been able to before.

No nothing. No staring. Nothing will happen if this continues.

As we sat down in the familiar setting of my office, I studied Lindsey carefully. She was as quiet and composed as ever, her eyes looking down and her hands in her lap. I took a deep breath, and as always, showed a smile.

"Lindsey," I began softly, trying to keep my voice steady. "I know it's hard for you to talk about what happened. But I want you to know that I'm here to help you. You don't have to go through this alone."

She glanced up at me briefly, her eyes were still dead.

"I don't want our sessions to be like the others," I continued, leaning forward slightly. "I want to understand you, to help you. But I can't do that unless you let me in."

As much as possible, I don't want to force things. I want my patients to open up when they're ready. But . . . 

Lindsey just stared at me. Her usual look. Her usual expression telling me-

Nothing.

For a moment, I feared that we would fall back into our usual routine of silence. But then, I was caught off guard. After many sessions, after living with her, after having many interactions with her.

It's the first time I saw her expression change.

Her hands tightened into fists, and I saw a flicker of emotion cross her face—fear, and something else. Hatred.

My heart pounded in my chest as I watched her. This was the first time I had seen such a raw display of emotion from Lindsey, and it gave me shivers. She was no longer the passive, silent girl I always see. There was something deeper, something darker.

"Lindsey," I said gently, trying to keep the panic out of my voice. "It's okay to feel angry. It's okay to feel scared. You can tell me what's going on."

Her look sharpened. I thought that she had already shown her emotions, but seeing her darkened eyes and full pupils, I knew I was wrong. Her expression was a chaotic mix of fear and hatred. She looked like a cornered animal, desperate and dangerous.

At same as hers, I couldn't hide mine. My fear. 

I felt a surge of panic, my instincts screaming at me to back away, to put distance between us. But I couldn't. I had to help her. I had to understand.

"Please, Lindsey," I said, with all the courage I had left. "Tell me everything. I want to help you."

For a moment, I thought she might actually speak. Her mouth opened slightly, and her eyes locked onto mine with an intensity that made my skin crawl. But then, just as quickly, she shut down. The walls came back up, and her expression turned blank and emotionless once more.

I let out a shaky breath, my heart still racing. I had come so close, but now it felt like we were further apart than ever. Lindsey's emotions had shaken me to my core, and I couldn't help but wonder what had triggered such a reaction. What was she hiding? What was she so afraid of?

The rest of the session passed in uneasy silence. Lindsey's demeanor had returned to its usual stillness, but I couldn't forget the look in her eyes, the intensity of her emotions. It's haunting me.

I could feel her stare, more bold than before. It feels like I'm in a tight space in her presence. I couldn't move freely, I couldn't even hold my breath. There's really something wrong. It can't be in my imagination only, I can't be hallucinating.

I don't know what to do. I can't help her. s̶h̶e̶'̶l̶l̶ ̶k̶i̶l̶l̶ ̶m̶e̶. Not like this.

I'm scared. I'm afraid of her. I'm afraid of my mute patient.

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