suicide attempts were my addiction in a way

they gave me a form of control i didn't have

plenty of people try to make suicide poetic and beautifully tragic

but the thing is

suicide isn't beautiful

it's not artistic

my attempts weren't beautiful

they left me feeling raw and with plenty of bodily damage

ive lost people to suicide and it sure as hell wasn't poetic

suicide is a terrible thing and there's so many people who lose their fight with their mental illness

stop making suicide beautiful because it's really not