Hm. Do anyone have a imaginary friend?

If ya don't, damn.
But if ya do, EYYY! Ya is like me!

Y'all may be thinking-
"Six/Azure/Zeta, why the hell you, a 16 year old, still have an imaginary friend? Aren't imaginary friends for children?" Well, lemme tell you- you're wrong.

I'm a special case. See, I was mostly alone during my time in the terrible Special Ed services and outside of it most of my life. Even before my venture to the online world (I know I have Friends online, but IRL, I am lonely😭).

But despite the loneliness, I have developed a childhood imaginary friend who still stays by my side, which is called.. well, it doesn't have a name, so for now, lets call it Alex.

I don't have the vision of what he looks like, so imagine this one is a small fox that likes climbing onto people's shoulders, or a brownish lizard that constantly hugs you and can float.

...Damn. It REALLY has been a while since I last thought of my friend. 
But hey- least I could talk to him.

... anywhere..

. . .

...Question. AGAIN.
Do anyone of you have this one disorder (I am not so sure if thats a skill, a disorder, or one of those urges, but for now, imma call this one a disorder) where you constantly talk to your imaginary friend, or to yourself in other people's perspective/opinion, ANYWHERE you go- no matter if its public, or private, all because ya couldn't get a chance to hear your voice in your mind, like one of those scenes in shows where a character talks in their mind and ya get to hear them? 

If not- Damn.. Lucky you guys..
If so, I feel ya.

I always thought this is some sort of urge that awakened due to the everyday loneliness I get from the real irl world, and every time, every frickin time, I think people hear me speak to myself so they could tell me to stop, or me reading my replies/what I am typing (especially the.. uhh.. how to put it, Rated R.. rps I did). And hell, one guy said that its a sign of me being insane. 

I wonder if I am insane already. Because first of all, when I talk to myself, I act like two people- Myself, and my imaginary friend. Alex is friendly to me, but he sometimes not litterally or real kill me just for the lols, while I do the same. And before ya all go crazy, no.
Alex is not a frickin murderer.
He's a friend. That likes shooting shit.

And to be honest, its fair that we both are friends. With me, Zeta/Azure/Six, being the physical fighter lover, and Alex, a chaotic ranged shooter with the intent to kill, we both are good. Though, I know at some point, I have to let him go. Especially since I am older. But seeing as I don't make any friends so far, I decided to keep him with me, until I really make friends with REAL people.

..Huh.

I wonder what you guys think. Of me having an imaginary friend, the whole me talking to self constantly publically/privately thing, and many more, so let me know what shit I need to change. 

This is Zeta/Azure/Six (ZAS- Ha!), Signing Off!