The rain is gone, but the aftermath lingers on the lonely earth. Puddles cover much of the ground, almost like pools of tears, like the sky was crying. Now, of course, it's sunny, but down in the forest, it still feels almost forlorn, as if the forest tried to cover it's tears and smile again.

I can't smile, because I'm too scared. She can't be. But she is. She can't be. But she is.

Cinderkit is gone. It's a different gone than the hole that Pinepaw's death left in my heart, this one, in a strange way is almost worse.

I know I'll see her again, but the cat I see then won't be my friend anymore. It'll be some sick, twisted cat with the same name. The same fur. Yet a different, broken soul. Silentpelt broke my friend. He's coming for me next.

The real question is where Cinderpaw could've went. Maybe to another clan? Could she have gone to the Dark Forest somehow? I shudder at both thoughts. No, Cinderpaw would never go to FrostClan. Even if what she's doing is wrong, she believes it's right.

As I watch the queens and warriors look for the apprentice, like she's going to appear in the clearing if they keep calling her name, I feel a sense of dread pierce me like an icicle. I'm no better than her. I trained with her. I fought with her. I never once told her to stop, never warned her, never expected any of this.

It's all my fault.

I shove the thought angrily towards the side of my brain, but it clings there. Your fault, your fault, your fault.

Pinepaw died because of my training. Wolfstar died because of my training. Cinderpaw's gone because i never stopped her.

"Everkit!" Foxsong wails, and my heart freezes again.

Everkit was the one who Cinderpaw was talking to last night.

Could he have gone with her? Who else did we lose?

I jump down from my cozy watching place atop the apprentice den, and a quick scan in the apprentice and kit dens reveals that I only have two disappearances to hate myself for.

I sigh, relieved, and then look up at the sky. Daylight's coming on, but since Mothflight, no, Mothstar now, is at the Moonpool, I have nothing to do today. I guess that the new deputy will probably have something for me to do, even though all I want to do is sit in my den and hit my stupid head against the wall.

She walks up to me, smiling. "Do you know anything about the disappearance?" She asks, "I know you were a close friend of hers."

I watch Hawkkit tumble with Firekit through the clearing, ignoring her, and then say dully, "Have you tried tracking the scent?"

"The rain washed it away."

Of course she tried. She knows now I don't care and I'm not going to answer her, so she just says, "Anyways, if you want to go to the Gathering tonight, there is one. It'd be your first."

I nod. FrostClan will be there, along with RiverClan and ForestClan. Everyone knows that DarkClan only ever showed up to one, and that 'one' was basically a huge scary announcement of their 'great powers' and then everyone was done with them and never thought about it again.

Of course, life must go on, so I spend the day hunting with some of the younger warriors. Blazefur, Lionpelt, and Moonblaze all are great hunters, but Lionpelt is so distant now. I long for the days when we were close friends, when I was just a ball of fur and he was an eager new apprentice. Those days are over. My only real friend just left for who knows where. Maybe I should make some new ones...

"So, how are you guys?"

"Good." Lionpelt says.

"Great." Moonblaze has her tail locked with Blazefur's. Maybe there's something going on here, but it's not something I'd like to ask.

Blazefur unlocks his tail from Moonblaze's and flicks it to silence us. A thrush chatters on a nearby branch. He jumps up, scouring it with his claws, and catches it. Carefully, he buries it to get it later.

"Well, we can't let him show us up, now can we?" Lionpelt whispers in my ear. I nod, giddy with excitement. Then we're off, racing through the forest. I feel the wind in my fur, and together, we catch enough prey for all the kits in the nursery. Honestly, there are only three, and those are close to being apprentices.

When we return to camp, Moonblaze looks up at the sky. "I better make the most of this one. It'll be my last Gathering for a while."

"Why?" I ask.

She gestures to her belly, which is swollen. I nod in understanding.

The night comes quickly, and with it, time to leave. I follow the swarming mass of cats out of the clearing and into the forest, until we reach the bend in the river. We cross it, and there in the moonlight is a circle of interwoven trees with one big tree at the center. The gatheringplace. Mothstar, newly returned, hops up to the top. Silverwing sits at the bottom. In four of the lowest branches, the four leaders sit. Hawkstar, the ForestClan leader, is boredly looking at her claws. Onestar, the FrostClan leader, is acting like he's in control, like his clan has done nothing wrong. I hate him. Bluestar, the new RiverClan leader, is acting similarly to Mothstar- she's nervous, but composed. All of them together are regal and terrifying, especially to just a little apprentice down at the bottom.

I look for a spot, and there's an open one next to a black apprentice about my age. "Hello." I say.

She turns to me, and that's when I recognize her. She's the cat who killed Pinepaw.

"Y-y-you murderer."

"It was the will of StarClan."

"Who says, you foxheart?"I hiss.

"Onestar." She replies, ears flat.

"Then Onestar can die in the Dark Forest himself."

"If this wasn't a gathering, I'd kill you, you mousehearted DragonClan cat!"

"You already killed my best friend. Isn't that enough?"

She's silent.

As the leaders talk, we sit there in awkward coldness, but I don't want to break it. This cat- this murderer- killed Pinepaw. She doesn't even regret it.

Mothstar goes last, announcing the warriorship of Halftail and Bluefrost, and telling the clans about Cinderpaw and Everkit's disappearance, like that will suddenly make it better.

I get up to go, she says finally, "I'm very sorry for your loss."

I turn around, and say with squinted eyes, "Sorry doesn't bring him back."