The nightmares have gotten worse. I can't look at anyone anymore. I hide in the nursery most of the time, pressing my kits against me so I know they're still there. Still warm. Hearts still beating. Mine, it seems, is frozen over. I can't feel anything anymore.

Like ice. How cruel.

Hawktalon and Lilyfrost are mates, and no doubt by the time greenleaf comes she'll be here in the nursery, hopefully I can leave by then.

Today, however, I have something to do besides moping and hiding, and I'm glad of it. I can't take the worried looks in Flintfang and Firepool's eyes, the way Mothstar stares me down, Volcanoheart's angry scowl.

You need to tell him, says the insistent voice in my head. Tell him you know.

No, I retaliate, He wouldn't have. The cat was lying. She lied.

Flarepaw and Sunpaw are tackling each other, laughing and puffing as they roll over each other and into my kits.

Brightkit squeaks, obviously not hurt but amused, and joins in, slashing with her claws sheathed and sticking her tongue out.

"Well, we need to head out, don't we? It may take all day if we don't start now." My ears prick as I see Flintfang walk from behind me. He's purring, fur slick and eyes glittering with kindness.

I chuckle. "Shall we? I better wake up Dawnpaw, then." I walk to the apprentice den, trying to recover from the aftershocks of pure terror I always get from my nightmares. There's no escape from them now- the images dance in my mind, always at the back of my thoughts, just waiting for me so they can bring me back to the endless darkness at the back of my mind. Today, I refuse to let them take me.

It's Dawnpaw's assessment, after all. I will be happy for her if not for anyone else. My eyes glaze with pain for a second and then I whisper, "Wake up, Dawnpaw." She gets up from between her two brothers, the same glittering, curious eyes and carefree expression pasted on her face.

"It's today." She states.

"Yes, yes it is."

"You think I'll pass?"

"No, I know you will." I tell her, and the beams at me.

"Come on." I flick my tail, gesturing for her to follow me.

She follows, and I see Firepool and Flintfang with her brothers. The camp is emptier than usual, and I can't place why. I look around, as if everyone's hiding, and i realize that there are just less cats now. The list of those lost to famine, fights... so long... Thunderclap, Blackfire, even Timberfall, Mothstar's sister. There are many more, who's faces and names I can't remember off the top of my head.

Lionfur strides over to me, purring into my ear. "Good luck."

I look up at him, the cat I used to look up too. "I- well, thank you. But you should be telling Dawnpaw that."

Dawnpaw waves her tail invitingly, but Mothstar calls us over. "Listen, your assessment is to find as much prey as possible before the sun goes down. I wish all of you luck. May StarClan light your paths."

Cobrapaw, Dawnpaw, and Foxpaw watch with unveiled excitement as Mothstar nods, and they spread out in every direction.

I hear the pawprints throughout the forest, but I know I'm just focusing on Dawnpaw today. I spring after her, watching through the bushes as she runs after prey. She finds a finch, but it flies away before she can catch it, twittering madly. After that, she wanders around for a while, catching a shrew right before sunhigh. I note her technique, which is still rough, but at least she's catching something. She wanders around until the sun begins to set in the sky.

Only... only one piece of prey? No way. She knows she's about to fail too, I can tell. She looks more frantic, until she pricks her ears, smelling a shrew. She pounces, but misses. "Fox dung!" She hisses.

She sees the shrew, sitting a little bit away, and pounces again. There it is again, just a little way off. She leers at it, and follows it into the now darkening forest.

The black trees...

"DAWNPAW!"

She... why can't she see me or hear me? I scream louder, and then jump down from the tree where I'm watching, just to find her, wide-eyed, watching a finch.

"DAWNPAW!"

Then I hear her muttering. "Got... pass... pass..." Her eyes are a misty blue, like she's in a world of her own.

She pounces, landing squarely on the finch. My heart skips a beat and she sees me. "Icestorm! Icestorm, I?"

There's a crack and suddenly, without warning, the branch cracks.

She screams, and suddenly, her bloody body is lying on the ground. The trees seem suddenly more real, the black fading away, leaving Dawnpaw lying there.

Dead.

"She..." I realize suddenly what this means. Someone's out there. I haven't made it out yet. I still live in the nightmare, day in and day out.

There's no escape now.