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               IN THE DESOLATE LANDSCAPE of the apocalypse, teenage girls epitomize resilience and adaptability amidst the chaos. They navigate the perilous world with a blend of determination and ingenuity, their once familiar teenage concerns overshadowed by the primal need for survival.

               What happens when that survival seems futile? Everything you've strived for taken from you in a matter of seconds.

                           The man who saved Carl died brutally in front of his kids and the people he made his kids.

            Dirt coats Koa's skin and under her nails. She doesn't know what day it is, how many times the sun has set and emerged from between the trees they've found some sort of safety in.

        Panting after killing a few walkers, Koa lets the grass beneath her back tickle her. She takes in the sound of Beth and Daryl's breathing, letting her know she isn't alone even though she's lost her sisters, brothers and more than half the people she's let her heart beat for over the last almost two years.

        Koa wipes the sweat from her head, glossy and tired eyes peering over at Beth. The blonde spares her a small smile, even after all she's been through she manages to smile at Koa. The brunette girl engraves the sight into her head, vowing to never let it fade from her memory.

                   KOA TALKS. SHE IS a bigger talker. So, when a fire is flickering between the three and she hasn't muttered a word, Daryl has to raise an eyebrow. But—as far as they all know—their family is dead. Koa lost her sister again. What is there to speak about?

           Knees tucked to her chest, Koa can't help but think about the early days of this all. Amy, Dale, Andrea—Lori—Uncle Shane.

        The sea of trees make Koa jump with every noise. She failed Lori and Carl. Silence makes her recall that bloody car seat and the possible cries that erupted from Judith in her last moments. She failed Sadie. She lost her—again.

            From the right of the sulking girl, Beth speaks up. "We should do something," Beth mumbles. Koa doesn't speak, doesn't change her stoic expression, her finger just runs along the old class ring, staring at Shane Walsh engraved into the band.

        "We should do something," Beth repeats louder this time bur Daryl's glare just burrows into her, "We aren't the only survivors. We can't be." Koa bites her bottom lip, no energy to be even verbally pessimistic. That beacon of hope that Beth Greene carries around still shines through even as they have no home except each other. "Rick, Michonne—they could out here," She continues despite the lack of conversation, "Maggie and Glenn could have made it out of A block. They could've," She insists, staring right at Daryl.

             Koa finally picks her head up, eyes blinking slowly. A log shifts in the fire, embers flying around them as crickets chirp. "Koa, Sadie could be out here," Beth tries but still has no reaction from the girl, "Daryl, you're a tracker. You can track," She says as she gets up. Koa's gaze follows her every action, still somehow mesmerized by the blonde even given the circumstances.

          Daryl and Koa stay seated. Her bones feel like paper, every move is a shred to her skin and stability.

             "Come on. The sun with be up soon. If we head out now—" Beth says but still neither party move, "Fine! If you won't track, I will!" And she stomps off, knife in hand into the darkness. Fear of abandonment runs deep in the Walsh/Finch family tree. Koa Finch wouldn't be who she is today if it didn't.

                Abandoned by her parents who were neglected by theirs. Abandoned by Sadie the day the world fell. Abandoned by her uncle for greed.

                Koa doesn't like this cycle and Beth stomping away ignites a pain so sharp in Koa's chest the scar from her uncle dances in pain as she forces herself to her feet. She doesn't even give Daryl the chance to follow as they ascend into the woods but she doubts he won't follow anyway.

               Beth hears Koa's shuffling and spins around to face her. "You givin' up on Sadie? Carl?" Beth angrily questions. Koa freezes. A small breeze rolls through the trees, causing Koa to shiver, trying her best to pull her leather jacket around her body but it does not do much. Her voice hoarse, Koa finally speaks, "I didn't say that—"

               "You're not doin' anythin' to find 'em," Beth retorts. Koa takes a deep breath. Beth's bright blonde hair is the only thing Koa can truly make out under the moonlight. Koa wants to tell the girl she's numb. She wants to express how broken she is but how fair is that to her? Hershel is dead. No way around that. Butchered by a cold, evil man in front of his kids.

           It doesn't feel fair for Koa to feel so paralyzed when there is the possibility of her family member being alive—there's no hope for Beth and her father. Only Maggie.

     "I—Beth—"

       "Don't run off like that again," Daryl's stern voice startles them both. He keeps walking, leaving the girls in silence again. Beth stands, still waiting for Koa's response. There is no right one though. So, the Finch teen walks ahead of her, ignoring the boulder hovering over her chest by a thread, threatening to crush her at any moment.

          JUST LIKE BETH SAID, the sun has risen quickly after they left their makeshift camp. Beth is back to the only one talking and Koa keeps glancing over at her, ignoring the way her heart still flips when Beth gets slightly close to her.

         Their family's might be dead and Koa still has a stupid crush in the stupid apocalypse. Pathetic, really.

      They reach a clearing and suddenly Daryl moves a pile of leaves, discovering a small footprint of some sort. Koa watches carefully over the other two's shoulders, looking around on guard every so often. "Could be Luke's. Or Molly's. Whoever they are, it means they're alive," Beth speaks hopefully about two kids from the prison. "No. This means they were alive 4 or 5 hours ago," Daryl tells her.

         "They're alive," Beth insists, walking away again. Koa sighs, crouching down to get a better view of what Daryl found. "Just leave her be. Let one of us have something of hope," Koa mumbles but he still hears her. He grunts, "Hope is dangerous."

        "So is a Beth Greene without any," Koa adds as she stands up, following after Beth swiftly.

              Mud dirties their shoes as they find themselves in a trail guarded by shrubbery. Their eyes are glued to the ground, tracking the footprints still. "They picked up the pace right here. Got out in a hurry," Daryl comments, "Things went bad." Koa presses her palm to her forehead. The day Daryl listens to anyone will be a miracle.

        "Wouldn't kill you to have a little faith," Beth remarks, "You, too," She gestures to Koa. The brunette presses her lips together, exhaling loudly, "I didn't even say a word, Beth." Koa chooses to not comment on Faith being her middle name and the irony of it all. Her lack of it should have her whole name cursed and not just her last name.

        "Yeah. I know. That's the problem. You always talk and you aren't," Beth sasses with an eye roll. Koa copies her actions but stays as calm as she can. An argument is the last thing she wants but one with Beth is something she'd never want. "Faith? Faith ain't done shit for us," Daryl huffs out, "Sure as hell didn't do shit for your father."

           A deep tension settles over the three. Koa immediately looks over at Beth who is frozen still, back turned to them.

            "Dude," Koa sighs, looking up at the sky in annoyance, "That is not a fair fucking thing to bring up—"

            "Why not? She's actin' like this is a damn casual Tuesday! Like we're just lookin' for some kids!" Daryl yells, stepping closer to Koa. She stands her ground, "Just—stop. We don't have the energy for a damn argument, Dixon!" Koa's voice cracks as it's the loudest she's spoken in probably days.

                  But Beth finally spins around and there is an out of character frown across her face. Daryl and her just stare at each other for a moment, no apology given but his face slightly softens when he sees Beth's expression. Koa awkwardly stands in the middle, shoving her hands in the pockets of her tattered jeans. The class ring sits in her pocket, slightly chipped from the damage done around her that day. She can feel it knick her skin but it does not draw blood, just something of comfort.

            Beth begins to grab berries from the bushes, "They'll be hungry when we find them." Daryl nods and offers his black bandana to her, tapping her arm. She ignores it for half a second before she gives in, storing the berries in the bandana.

         Truth is, Koa doesn't think they're alive. They were young, too young to survive on their own out here. Unlike Daryl, she keeps her comments to herself. She walked in when Beth's wrist was bleeding from her suicide attempt. The girl's pale and clammy skin is embedded in her mind. The way the blood spilled from the self inflicted wound on her wrist.

         Koa won't let her get to that point again. She can't. She'd never forgive herself if her pessimism led to Beth's downfall.

     The trail only leads them to more death. Two walker bodies lay dead in front of them. Neither that any of them recognize which gives Koa some sort of relief. Daryl touches a leaf with blood still remaining on it. "Why?" Koa questions from next to Beth. "Because this ain't walker blood," Daryl explains. Koa watches as Beth's shoulders slump for a small second before she forces them back up. "The trail keeps going," She says, "They fought them off," Beth steps over the walkers.

           In the depths of despair, amidst the shadows of uncertainty, there exists a flicker of light in the heart of a lost teenage girl—hope. Though she may feel adrift in a sea of confusion and loneliness, hope remains Beth's steadfast companion, a beacon guiding her through the darkest nights. Despite the weight of her struggles, she clings to the belief that tomorrow holds the promise of brighter days.

             Alone in the suffocating grip of despair, Koa's spirit lay shattered, her eyes vacant, devoid of even the faintest glimmer of hope. Koa feels bad saying it to herself in her head but—she couldn't give less of a shit about these two. She only drags her feet along because Beth cares. Koa would rather be heading towards the ghosts of Carl, Sadie and Judith.

              "No," Daryl eats away at Beth's hopefulness, "Got walker tracks all up and down here. At least a dozen of them." Koa chews at her bottom lip, watching Beth's panicked expression. A twig snapping breaks the pessimistic tension. Immediately, Koa grabs her pig gutter from her pocket and Beth raises her own blade next to her. Daryl spins around, eyes darting between the trees but nothing is seen.

         A shuffle from the side scares Koa. She turns her neck only to see a male walker grabbing Beth's arm. The blonde squeals in fear, trying to push it off of her. Koa takes less than a second to comprehend the danger. Her feet speedily guide her to the walker. "Koa, watch out!" Daryl warns but the walker is moving too much for him to line up a safe shot with his crossbow.

          Hearing Beth gasp in fear of her life causes Koa to not wait another moment when Daryl can't kill the walker. Anger and fear coursing through her veins. Koa grabs the walker who is much taller than her, by the back of his flannel. He snaps and snarls as she spins him around to face her, not Beth.

           "Koa!" Beth yells. Koa stumbles back a bit, blindly swinging at the walker until her back hits a tree. It lunges at her but Daryl grabs it by the back of the collar, giving Koa the opportunity to stab into the walker's head until the mushy skull reaches the hilt of her blade. It goes limp in Daryl's arms so Koa retracts her blade, groaning when dark blood spills from it's head.

          All three panting, they dust themselves off, a silent check over each other.

        "Come on," Daryl grunts and the two girls follow.

                    THE TRAIL OF WALKER prints leads them to an old railway. It's pretty open and peaceful if Koa ignores the four walkers having breakfast, lunch and dinner not that far from them.

            Beth's heart drops as she stares at the shoe prints, only then when Koa sees the girl's paling expression does she realize the prints lead in the direction of the four hungry walkers. Using the victims as his distraction, Daryl kills each of the walkers as Beth and Koa trail behind him. The brunette girl covers her mouth and gagged noises when she sees the guts the litter the dirt and how far they spread out.

                   Flies buzz around them, causing an annoying ringing in Koa's ears. She locks her gaze onto Beth. The blonde is pale, lips parted and her ocean eyes are focused on something else; an old black sneaker that looks like it once belonged to a child—Luke.

                 That guilt that was hidden under Koa's annoyance surfaces when she realizes her pessimism was right. The kids are dead. Her mouth goes dry.

                 The Governor did this. He's the reason these kids are dead. Why Judith or Carl or Sadie or Nellie or everyone is fucking dead.

                 Staring at the kids guts, Koa can't look anywhere else. Is this what Judith looked like? Carl? Sadie—no, no. She can't spiral. Not when a broken sob slips passed Beth's lips.

         Daryl packs up like it means nothing.

              Koa takes a deep breath, swallowing her own tears as she grabs Beth's left hand gently, her thumb rubbing circles on the calloused yet somehow soft skins. Beth's body shakes with each cry and gasp for air. Koa watches Daryl stare—just to walk away. She buries her head in the crook of Beth's neck, blocking Daryl from her sight.

           Beth lets Koa hold her, basking in the touch of the girl—the only thing keeping her grounded.

    Koa peeks up, seeing Daryl stopped where she last saw him, soft eyes on the two but he has no idea what to do. This isn't his special area of expertise exactly. Koa stands up straight, arms falling around Beth's frame. Heart thudding in her chest, Koa's shaky hand wipes Beth's tears. Blue eyes flutter shut under Koa's touch.

          "Come on," Koa whispers, hand trailing down to grasp Beth's hand again. The blonde nods slowly, grabbing Koa's hand back and slowly catching up to Daryl.

———

posting this right before i take a final. god.