Butterfly

Park Jimin's mind was filled with a thick, smokey, haze. Each day bled into the other: dance, practice, eat, repeat, and then finally sleep.

Each time Jimin went through one of Taehyung's training courses, it always ended the same way. He would apologize and then the room would become hazy. He noticed that the gas itself had stopped weeks ago, now it was just general exhaustion that took him. In the weeks that passed, Jimin failed to truly crack that cold exterior Taehyung armored around himself, but with each apology Jimin could see a tiny seed of guilt start to grow on that sharp face.

That was enough - just to see emotion in someone's eyes.

Emotion that wasn't hunger. Wasn't expectation.

Kim Seokjin made Jimin's head spin when he saw him each night. It was like he was seeing three people. The president he used to admire as a freshman, the man behind the golden deer mask, and the one who held his life in balance as if it were tied to a leash. The obedience towards Seokjin was woven into his mind like a needle sewing it throughout his brain. Little strings connecting till all his neurons could be plucked by Taehyung or Seokjin.

But at night - at night was when Jimin truly survived. Because then he got to dream. While the dreams weren't any more real than the days he went through, they usually were good ones. Dreams filled with a blacked haired man with tattoos and a bunny smile. A feeling of warmth and comforting ease - like finally sleeping in your own bed after months away from home.

Of course he still didn't understand why Jungkook lied to him, but he stopped fighting those dreams week two. Stopped fighting the anger and confusion surrounding him. Because each dream was the sole comfort of his day - why would he try to lose that too?

Jimin didn't know if the dreams were memories or made up by his mind but each night would be small moments where he got to watch a movie on Jungkook's lap and spill popcorn or dance under the stars. Some nights the two of them were chasing someone down a street like thugs in a gangster film and others were Jimin burning waffles the one time he tried to make them. The dreams never repeated and sometimes they were hazy like an old film screen, but each morning he woke up with a pit in his stomach that they came to an end.

Jimin's felt his lungs fill up slowly and he choked down a groan. His whole body ached - Seokjin pushed him past his limits in rehearsal daily. He had training with Taehyung each morning on SADA culture and standards then at night he practiced with Seokjin until his legs physically gave out under him. He danced daily under that intense stare, Seokjin's eyes darkening with each correct move and lips always settled into a victorious grin.

By the third week there was no reason to track time anymore. He just went day by day by day doing as the voices and the fog said. Dance to this. Refer to this. Go to this.

Dream or reality, Jimin couldn't care less. Did it matter? What was he doing here in the first place? What was the point of coming to Seoul Academic Dance Association? Did he ever even leave?

Did Jungkook even exist?

Jimin heard a low voice telling him to get up. Saying that it was time for something. He felt cold fingers grace his lower back tenderly, lingering in their touch. Kim Seokjin was telling Jimin to dance - he knew that voice. Recognize it's harsh cadence and something in his chest pulled him to the dance floor like he was a puppet controlled by strings.

He'd do anything that voice said.

And so Park Jimin reached the dance floor and felt the lights dim around him. He could recognize that the room was packed around him - more pairs of eyes peaking under golden and silver masks that stared at him, filled with that same hunger he'd gleaned from Seokjin daily.

As the first note of the medley Seokjin had been teaching Jimin for weeks started to echo through the halls, something like a dam cracked within him. The stage light felt like fire on his skin, the floor beneath him so cold he could feel little bumps travel across his arms. The music consumed him and everyone in the room faded away.

He couldn't explain how or why but the second that key was hit on the piano and he was standing alone under a stage light, his memories started to flood back.

All of them.

That night freshman year during SADA's bid day, Jimin had made the choice to refuse the bid and take Jungkook up on his offer to leave Busan instead. Something felt off about the whole SADA thing to Jimin in a way that Jungkook never did.

The next day before they could leave, a letter came to Jimin's dorm with a formal invitation to speak with Seokjin. Jimin knew he should have ignored it but he hadn't heard from either Jungkook or Taehyung all day. It gnawed at the back of his mind that their disappearance was tied to it and so he took Seokjin up on the meeting.

When he got to the SADA house Seokjin personally escorted Jimin through their their front doors. He was just a college student himself back then, in his dusted pink suit and tie. Jimin remembered the way Seokjin frowned when he saw a bit of lint of on shoulder and plucked it off before taking Jimin into SADA's basement where Kim Taehyung was waiting for him.

His best friend ran, grabbing Jimin by the shoulders. His hair was disheveled and he was squeezing his thumb in his fist over and over again. There was sweat on his neck and he kept glancing between Jimin and Seokjin. Jimin hadn't seen Taehyung since bid day - by the looks of it, he wondered if Taehyung had left this house since.

"Jimin, please. Please just come back and say that you'll stay with us." Taehyung begged, holding tightly onto Jimin's forearm. His voice was breaking and his hands shook but Jimin could only blink in surprise. "Just accept your bid and say that bid day was a mistake. Say you'll join SADA. I need you to do this for me. We'll live through it together, remember? Go through this together. You promised."

"Tae - I can't." Jimin said, feeling his heart hammer.

Taehyung's entire face crumbled in horror.

"Well we gave that a try." Kim Seokjin said with a shrug before pushing Taehyung back so that he stumbled a couple steps.

"Sir, please. Let me try again I'll get him to agree you don't have to-"

Seokjin waved his hand, expressionless, as some masked members pulled Taehyung through a door behind them. Seokjin turned to Jimin, smiling as the doors echoed shut.

"You have free will here, Jimin." Seokjin said, brushing his knuckles down Jimin's cheek. "Do you know what life you have for you if you reject us? I will make sure that you have no work in this industry. You won't get a scholarship renewal. Won't get cast in any student shows. No internships or professional work. Your career will die today."

Jimin scoffed and Seokjin only smiled as he continued: "Do you know what Jungkook's family does? Who they are? Either you join us or you're whoring yourself out to a life of crime."

"I-" Jimin closed his mouth, the words dying in his throat.

"They hurt people, Jimin. They're criminals. We've hired them to do our dirty work before. Jungkook will say something fancy about "gathering information" but don't think their hands are clean doing it. If you stay with that boy, that's the life you're choosing."

"I can choose neither." Jimin said, his voice shaking. "There's the third option."

Seokjin shook his head sweetly. His smooth hands looped around Jimin's forearm and pulled him towards the door Taehyung was taken in. "No." Seokjin said. "No there's not."

When the door opened, there were two boys tied to separate chairs before him. Both bruised and bloody. One with eyes streaked with gold and another with eyes like the night sky. Both were staring out at Jimin as if to scream for him to run.

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A/N:
Hehe update ❤️❤️
Small updates on me: I'm in a situationship that is rapidly going down hill because it's a bit of a forbidden romance trope irl because I work with them and haha don't date your coworkers people 🫡🫡

How's everyone doing btw? Any Halloween costumes you're excited for? I'm doing space cow girl for first night of Halloween and I'm pretty excited for that

Anyway, love you guys!!
-Vio