CHAPTER ONE
❛ dumped with sydney novak. ❜

MORPHED BLURS OF PITTSBURGH FLURRIED PAST THE WINDOW, my eyes focusing in and out on small details in between; a general store sign here, a dog walker there. I tried not to look at the duffel bag tucked between my feet, tried not to listen to my parents laughing with each other obliviously, tried not to stare at the mountain of luggage emerging from the back for the trip...

     Which I wasn't coming along to.

I'll rewind to the moment I found out. It was a perfectly normal evening, and we were eating dinner (a mundane lasagna, if you're that interested) so I wasn't expecting anything out of the norm to happen. Things that fall into the category of 'out of the norm' are things like your Dad suddenly announcing "Hallie, your mother and I are going away for a week or two."

     Okay, I think to myself. But what does 'going away' imply? Is it for work? Or an emergency? And I ask them if I can come.

     That's when Mom pipes in, a grin plastered across her face as she adds "No, sweetie... it's for us two to have time together. Like a romantic getaway!"

      'Romantic getaway', my ass. Since when do my workaholic-accountant-slash-marketing-manager parents just decide to escape for a lovey-dovey escape out of spontaneity? And not just that, they're going to some place in Wyoming to go hiking. Hiking. Ha! I would kill to be a fly on the wall there, to see my parents attempting to be at one with the outdoors.

     Mom caught my gaze in the rear view mirror and sighed. A wave of irritation rushed over me as I fidgeted in my seat. "Hallie, chin up, sweetie. You look like you've been sucking a lemon."

     "Hey! When life gives you lemons..."

"Dad, I'm not in the mood." before he could say any more dad jokes, I shot him a glare in the rear view mirror that wasn't too cold, but just enough to remind them that I wasn't on board with any of this. "You know, I like hiking too. Or I could, if I really wanted to. Why can't you take me along to Samoyoga—"

"Saratoga."

"— okay, I get it. Wyoming. Why couldn't we just go later in the year? I'd be happy to come."

Mom was turning around in her seat now, the belt twisting awkwardly in such a way that just made me feel the overwhelming urge to correct it. But I resisted, bracing myself for the lecture I was surely about to hear.

"I know it's weird for you, honey. It's weird for us too — we've never been on vacation without you!" she stated matter-of-factly, to which my Dad nodded. "But you're seventeen now, you can take care of yourself."

"Exactly, which is why I don't understand why I need to camp out with Aunt Maggie."

Ah, yes. The icing on the cake. I was spending these unprecedented weeks in the home of my Aunt and two cousins: one of which was, admittedly, quite likeable and fun to be around. The other, however, was the only person I know who can do a better death stare than I can. Maybe that's a Novak thing.

"You're missing the point, Hallie. We just thought we needed to get away from everything, some time to reconnect in a way we haven't been able to in a long, long time." Mom paused. I knew that pause, and I knew what was coming after it, but I didn't want her to say it because it made me feel sick to my stomach. "The past year has been... tough. For all of us."

There it was. To be honest, above all, the thing I'd hate most about being with the Novaks is remembering that the last time I was there, my Uncle was still alive. And I'll walk past the basement, and try not to think of him... there.

     "... so maybe sharing a room with Sydney will be a way to combat these horrendous things both sides of our family have been experiencing recently."

     My eyes grew wide in shock, my toes curling inside my Converses uncomfortably. Sydney. You'd hope that was the aforementioned cousin who was pleasant to be around, but no. That's Liam. Sydney is the latter. I'm pretty sure she hates me.

     "Don't be so melodramatic, Hallie! 'Hate' is a very strong word." Oops. Did I say that out loud? "Besides, you two used to get along like a house on fire."

     "Key phrase: used to. Mom, please don't make me share a room with her," I pleaded. "If anything, do it for Sydney's sake. That's the last thing she'd want."

     Dad stops at a red light, now able to turn to me, too. "Look, it's only for a week and a bit. And I highly doubt you'll be biting each other's heads off by the end of it, but if you are, just move on. I mean, your Uncle and I used to clash all the time growing up, but that doesn't mean—"

"Sean, the light's green."

"— thank you, honey. That doesn't mean we didn't love each other. Heck, I loved him a lot, and just thinking about how he..."

There it was again. That elephant in the room that everyone hated talking about but would have to be discussed sooner or later.

Before long we were turning into Syd's neighbourhood, and I started to lift my backpack up from the floor and onto my lap, poised to get ready to grab the duffel bag and go. If I made this goodbye nice and quick, then maybe jumping straight into this painful week ahead would make it drag on less.

When Dad stopped the car in front of their house, I could see Aunt Maggie's face vanish behind quickly drawn curtains, not long before she emerged from the front door. She had a warm smile plastered across her face, but there was something superficial about it, something forced. Here we go...

"Hi, Hallie!" Aunt Maggie cooed a little too enthusiastically as I got out of the car, pulling me into an embrace. I patted her back awkwardly, trying not to pull away. I wasn't really much of a hugger — or anything remotely touchy, for that matter.

Mom and Dad came over soon enough to rescue me, each of them taking a turn to give her a hug as they all spewed out pretentious Hellos and So good to see yous. "So Maggie, how are things?" Mom asked, folding her arms as she gazed at her in an overly fixated manner.

"Oh, you know..." she shrugged her shoulders, her arms falling to her sides as she let out a breathy laugh. "Good. I mean, it's been a long year, but we're good!"

     "You look well!" Mom added.

     That was a lie. Maggie didn't look well — her eyes were sunken and tired, her strawberry blonde hair tied up a little scruffier than usual, and she seemed tense. Almost like she was doing everything she could to not lose her shit.

     A few seconds of what soon turned into awkward silence passed by, before Aunt Maggie asked "What d'you say we catch up over some coffee? It might be nice to sit down before your long trip—"

     "Oh, we can't, we can't do that," Mom interjected, shooting Dad a glance. "Our flight is pretty soon and it's a long way to the airport, so..."

     Another lie! I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Their flight wasn't for another four hours and it wasn't a long drive to PIT. So these were the hypocrites rushing off to avoid Maggie but leaving me with her family for a fortnight...

     "Sorry Maggie, we're gonna have to dash. But it was lovely to see you," said Dad, giving her another quick squeeze before he ruffled my hair as he walked past me. I scowled, patting my hair flat again as he started up the car again.

Grabbing me by the shoulders, Mom gave me a nimble kiss on the cheek before taking my hands in hers. Don't pry them away, Hallie...

"You're sure you have everything?" she inquired.

"Uh huh."

"And you have the spare house key for emergencies?"

"Yep," I patted my jeans pocket and it jingled harmoniously. "Right here."

"And if you need anything, you'll call or text us, okay?"

"Mom. I'll be fine."

"Okay, okay!" she let go of me, opening the car door and getting in. Immediately she rolled down the window, poking her head out. "Oh, and send the kids our love, Maggie!"

My Aunt's lips thinned into a weak smile, and we both watched blankly as my parents sped off down the street, not tearing our eyes away until they turned the corner. I couldn't see her face, but I'm pretty sure she was judging them as much I was at that moment. It wasn't until she clasped her hands together that I snapped out of my daze and turned to her.

     "Alright, lets get you settled in, shall we?" said Maggie, glancing over at my bags. "D'you need me to carry anything?"

     "Uhh, I think I might be okay..." I scanned my possessions. They only consisted of one backpack (for personal belongings), one duffel bag (for clothes and toiletries) and then my cello. It really wasn't much, but there was something in Maggie's eyes that seemed like a yearning to help or be of some use to me. It was impossible to say no to that look, so I reached down for my duffel bag and handed it to her, figuring I could at least have the decency to haul my cello in by myself. "Thanks, Maggie."

     She nodded curtly with a smile, starting to make her way from the side of the road to the front door as I trailed behind her. "So you're still playing cello then?"

     "Yeah, I still am."

     "Gosh, I can still remember when you got your first little bite-sized cello for Christmas that year, and now look!" she gestured to the black cello-shaped case hanging on my back. "It's almost as big as you are!"

     I let out a small chuckle, which soon subsided as she opened the front door, allowing me to step into the house.

     Walking into that corridor was like walking into a time capsule; except, I wish it was one that would stay dead and buried. A wave of nostalgia hit me, a memory of my Uncle swooping in and greeting me the way he always used to do — Hey, comrade! — and giving me a mock salute. Then he'd probably get an eye roll from my Dad, before they shook hands so... officially. I always used to find it so funny, the relationship between those two. They were identical twins, you see, so it was like watching the angel and the devil on your shoulder having a talk over afternoon tea. I sometimes think about Dad, and how hard it must have been for him to lose his twin. Does that hurt in a way that no other loss can? I'd never know. Although, when we were little kids, our parents always used to say that Syd and I might as well be twins separated at birth. We looked a lot more alike then than we do now, although there are definitely still similarities. That is, if she hasn't changed a lot in the past year since I last saw her.

"Hallie!"

I almost jumped out of my skin at the sudden mention of my name, but I was overwhelmed with calmness the moment I realised who the voice belonged too.

"Liam," I grinned, outstretching my arms as the kid ran into me. My youngest cousin, Liam, is probably the only person on this planet that I would willingly hug. There's just something about him that is impossible to say no to.

      He broke away from me after a few moments, and started to stand on his tip toes proudly. "I've been getting taller, you know." he gloated with a cheeky smile.

      "I'll be the judge of that, if you just stand normally." I responded, pushing him back down onto his feet so he was at his normal height. Cocking an eyebrow speculatively, I raised a flat hand to the top of his head, and drew it across to my body. "Yep. You've definitely grown."

     "Syd!" Aunt Maggie hollered up the stairs, making both Liam and I jump. "Come say hello to your cousin."

     "I can't, I'm in the bathroom!" a gruff yell echoed down the stairs. She sure sounded happy to see me.

     "Well, we're coming up in a minute, so you'd better be ready." sighed Maggie, patting me on the shoulder as she brushed past me. "I'm just gonna get the camping bed from the basement, but you can make yourself at home, honey."

     The basement. I froze as Maggie opened the door, briskly hopping down the stairs. The light wasn't switched on down there, and it was like she was being swallowed by a black nothingness until she flicked the switch. After that, a dim off-yellow glow spilled out of the door and into the living room. In my head, I suddenly started concocting images that I didn't ever want to imagine. But they were so clear, I could see it... Maggie wondering why her husband was down there so long... her going down to check on him... and finding him—

     "Hey, Hallie?" Liam's voice brung me back round to a safer place, putting my harrowing thoughts at bay. For now. "I was wondering, d'you think I could borrow your DS at some point while you're here?"

     "Of course you can!" I retorted, as if it was a stupid question (which it kind of was.) For years when we used to have family gatherings, the kids used to get bored pretty quickly like with most families, so they would run off and do their own thing. But Liam, Syd and I could never related to the squeaky-voiced girls playing 'Happy Families' or the rowdy boys kicking a slightly deflated football around the back yard. We'd much rather hide in one of the bedrooms upstairs, lit up by the glow of my Nintendo DS or doodling quietly. Funnily enough, those were some of my happiest childhood memories. Just the three of us.

     When Maggie came back, I followed her sheepishly upstairs and along the corridor until we reached a closed door. She rapped on it impatiently. "Syd, we're coming in!"

     The door swung open, and immediately I felt like I really shouldn't be here. Sydney was sitting on her bed, almost like she was guarding territory. Her piercing blue eyes bore into my own, as Maggie laid out the inflatable mattress on the bare floor that was at the end of Syd's bed, and brushed herself down.

     "I've gotta go out to get some groceries, so I'll have to leave you two here. Hallie, if you just press that black button, the mattress should start inflating. And Syd —" Aunt Maggie pointed a finger at Sydney accusingly. "— I don't want any of your attitude about this room sharing, alright?"

     Sydney immediately recoiled, her brows knitting together defensively. "Seriously? I wasn't even gonna—"

     "I don't wanna hear it!" Maggie snapped. "Maybe our guest can teach you a thing or two about being hospitable."

     And with one swift shut of the door, Syd's room became some kind of weird prison cell where the inmates were clueless of what to say. Neither of us liked small talk and were equally bad at it, I knew that much. Nevertheless, this was still awkward as fuck.

     With a sigh, I plonked myself down on the floor and held the small black remote in my hands. Pressing the button, I watched as a faint whirring sound faded into audibility, but was overshadowed by the sad sounding whistle of the mattress inflating. It sounded like an asthmatic dog on its deathbed.

     "So..." I spoke, grabbing Syd's attention. But once I had it, I didn't have clue what to do with it. I hadn't thought this through. What to say, what to say. "... you got any homework?"

I mentally kicked myself. Got any homework? What kind of half-assed question was that?

     Sydney shrugged, and continued sulking as she stared at the mattress which had barely risen at all in the past sixty seconds. We ended up falling into a cycle of staring, nodding, and sighing as the lame whistle continued to waver in the background.

     Oh boy, I thought. This is gonna be a LONG couple of weeks...

________________________

A/N:

chapter one is FINALLY here!! please let me know what you guys thought, i love getting to hear from readers.

why do you think sydney and hallie don't get on well anymore? and also, this is more random, but if anyone here has/had a nintendo ds, what was your favourite game? mine is animal crossing: new leaf (and i know that's 3DS but ah well!)

also, just a moment in history for readers from the future, this chapter was written during the coronavirus pandemic (how insane to say is that?) i'm currently self-isolating and writing is a great way of distracting myself. my advice to people in terms of coping would be to talk to people. it could be anyone — old friends from facebook, wattpad users, classmates/work colleagues, etc. — but it feels so nice to talk to others and know you're not alone, and we're all in the same boat. stay safe, you guys <3

song of the chapter: 'roll with it' - oasis
(hallie being dropped off with the novak family)

published: 26th march, 2020