You see their father suffered from severe depression and, quite frankly, a pure old mean spirit. He admitted that he felt 'eliminating' his children, and his wife, was the only way to rescue them from an evil world, consequently the mother would hide the children from their father when he went on rampages and threatened their lives. Eventually he would come back to his senses. But the sorrow of such things is that children live in a state of hyper vigilance; always on the run, looking over their shoulder, fearful.

Kevin's little sister came to him one day, around the age of 8 or 9, and asked him to climb to the top of a tree with her and push her out because something had happened and she didn't want to live anymore. Often she would hide in a drainage ditch that ran underneath the county road; she with her little black and silver transistor radio. She didn't hide there so much out of fear of death, but out of desperation for an escape from her home life.

Kevin got his first real whipping when he was one month old, according to their mother. It was December and he had caught a cold by lying underneath and open window. . . he wouldn't stop crying, but when his mom went to pick him up his Dad said, "I will not have a spoiled child, I will kill him first." Then he picked that baby up and spanked him. I remember thinking upon hearing this that kid couldn't have weighed much more than a five pound bag of sugar, and that was the beginning of physical cruelty towards this little boy.

Their father, on occasion, turned violent towards the animals. He'd take his fist to a horse's jaw, kick the pigs, or he'd spank their dogs until he broke their legs, then he would drag them to the pasture and shoot them for eating the chicken's eggs, what he referred to as 'they got lead poisoning'. If you have ever heard a dog being beaten, or its legs being broken, I need not say more to describe the horror of it.Kevin couldn't understand why the dogs kept getting lead poisoning for eating the eggs and why his family didn't; they ate the eggs, too afterall, until one day his Father shot a dog in the head right in front of him, then he understood all about 'lead poisoning'.

Another time Kevin's Dad whipped up on him because he couldn't get the hogs to load up on the trailer. He was just a kid, and afterward he said he asked his Daddy if he was going to drag him to the pasture and shoot him, too.One year a baby pig adopted those children as best friends and he would follow them all over the yard, even waited for them at the bus stop. He was the runt of the litter and they felt sorry for him because he could never get his share; but more than that they just loved the little fella. If you have ever held a baby pig, ah, they are adorable. But their dad decided that this little pig would never be worth his weight at market, so he forced his little son to take that precious pig behind the barn and bludgeon him with a hammer. The children begged for his life. In desperation they gathered acorns to feed it so their Daddy wouldn't complain about wasting food on him, but he wouldn't back down. Pride seldom does. Kevin was about nine years old when he had to kill that little pig, so that made his little sister 7 I guess.

Their Dad got mad at Kevin for who knows what yet again, when he was about twelve. Kevin was sitting on top of his horse with a 22 rifle under one arm and his cat named Patches under his other arm. Patches was a long haired Calico stray that had adopted that little boy and he had been allowed to keep her over the years, but now his father was saying, "Take that cat out to the pasture and kill it". I have no idea why, I don't think any of them knew. Kevin was crying and begging for Patches' life, as was his mother. Finally, one of the rarest of occasions, his Dad did back down.

When the little girl was around eight her Dad took her camping all alone. He had her swim naked, sleep naked, taught her to talk dirty, use the F word and shoot the finger. He wanted her to 'sit next to him in the truck the way a girlfriend sits next to a boyfriend', he said. Several times during the night when she awoke he was on his elbow leaning over her - watching her. Over the course of time this father showed his little girl naked pictures of himself and would, eventually, force her to take a naked picture for him. He talked about sex at any opportunity. He warned her to never tell her mother as she would never understand their special relationship and would divorce him. Obviously, it would be the little girl's fault, so she never told until she was sixteen, but she did try once after Cocomo died. I'll tell you about Cocomo in a minute.

The little girl's Dad picked the locks to the bathroom when she was bathing or showering and would make her pose nude for him, or 'show him her tan'. Other times she would open the door and find him lying on the floor with a mirror positioned underneath it to watch her.At times he had her lay on him, and he touched her where no father should.She was not allowed to shut her bedroom curtains and at night he would stand in the yard to watch her. (of course she was smart enough to turn off the lights before undressing! Gee –she wasn't stupid!).

Once she was undressing after church and he barged in. When she shot him a hateful look he slapped her across the face for that. Again, when they were barely double digits in age the father would drop his son off in one corner of the pasture with a gun and tell him to 'hunt' while he drove away with the little girl; no one knows where, or to do what.When she made it clear she did not welcome her Dad's advances in any way he told her she was not allowed in any room he was in. If he was in the kitchen eating she was not allowed in the kitchen . . .if he and/or the family were watching tv (the only tv they owned) she was not allowed in the living room . . .etc. It was a game of rejection with a message of unworthiness. She was an outcast who lived in rejection, under constant control, and fear.Their Dad started abandoning her at the county road. You see, they had two gates: one at the house and one about a quarter mile away at the county road. For example: The Dad, brother and sister would be heading into town and she usually sat by the door to get out and open the gate. Her Dad would pull through and drive away just leaving her standing there so her only choice was to walk back to the house; dejected with the message burning inside of her that she was unworthy of love aside from sex.