J. Barakat

"Dallon, why is Awsten crying?" I ask when I walk into the house. Dallon shushes me and rubs Awsten's back in circular motions. I sit across from them. 

"I-" Awsten looks up tearfully. "I can't believe this could happen- I just. I can't believe it." Awsten sighs and looks like he's on the verge of tears again. "Grumpy Cat is dead!" He sobs into Dallon's shoulder. 

"WHAT," I scream I stand up and pull my phone. "HOLY SHHHHIT... NOOOOO!" I shout. Dallon shakes his head. 

"I can't believe it. That cat- got me through so many rough days. I just can't believe it," Dallon sighs. 

"I loved that cat, more than I love other memes. Like- no, I'm too sad," I whimper and bang my forehead against the table. 

"We should hold a funeral," Dallon whispers. "Or at least a memorial or something!" 

Suddenly the door bursts open and someone runs in. "DALLON- GRUMPY CAT-" Brendon takes one look at us and joins us in out waterworks. "I LOVED GRUMPY CAT!" He shouts. 

I pull out my Grumpy Cat picture from my pocket. I put it on the table. The others do the same. 

"Wait- pause, we all have Grumpy Cat pictures just in our pockets? That's kinda weird," Awsten says, furrowing his eyebrows while staring at the pile of pictures. 

Dallon blinks. "It's what the author wants, just go with it," he states. 

"What?" Everyone asks staring at him. Dallon shrugs and goes back to crying. Brendon stares at the pictures and leans to it. 

"Thank you," he whispers. Dallon follows his head, and so does Awsten. I lean down. "You were so beautifully grumpy," I whisper and stand back up. 

~~~

"I guess all of you were pretty sad about Grumpy Cat?" Alex asks when I get back. I smile lightly and nod. "I think the memes helped everyone at one point," he says and steps towards me. I put my arms around him. Kissing his forehead gently. 

"Are you okay?" I ask cautiously, changing the subject. "When you called me, you sounded pretty panicked." 

The mood immediately changes. "My dad's in the hospital," Alex blurts out. He looks at me for a second before letting himself break down in my arms. I silently gasp and hold him tighter against my chest. His knees buckle and he slips from my arms. I internally curse and carry him to the side of the bed, sitting him down. I sit next to him and put my arm around him. "He had a heart attack- but-" Alex stops and brings his knees to his chest. "Ever since my parents got divorced- I haven't been talking to my dad- and you know why but-" 

"Alex, he hit you because you came out. Not just once. I'm proud of you for getting the hell away from him. And I get why you don't talk to him." 

"But- he's my dad. I can't just forget about it," he whispers. "Tom called me thirty minutes ago. I could go to the hospital. But- I didn't want to go until you got here." 

"Lex, do you want to go? Or do you want to wait for your mom?" 

"No, I want to go now, I can't wait any longer- If I don't go now-" He takes a shaky breath. 

"Okay," I nod. "Let's go." 

~~~

As soon as we step into the hospital, Alex grips my hand tighter. I ask the lady where Alex's dad is and we go up to wait. 

"Tom-" Alex whispers when he sees his brother. He rushes to him and hugs him. I walk over slowly and sit down. 

"Alex, you came," Tom says breathlessly. He pulls away and looks at his brother. "Dad is still unconscious- but they say he's stirring." 

"Okay," Alex bites his lower lip and sits next to me. Tom raises an eyebrow. "Right- this is my boyfriend, Jack. Jack, meet Tom." 

I shake his hand and looks back at Alex. I grip his hand and he looks at me. I silently go to hug him. Tom smiles gently and nods when our eyes meet. He turns to talk to a doctor. 

"Jack- I'm scared," he whispers, burying his face in the crook of my neck. 

"It's going to be okay," I answer, gently patting his back. "No matter what, I'm here." 

"We can see him now," Tom says as he walks over. Alex pulls away and stares at the door. Behind the door, is the man he feared for years. "But- only if you want to, of course-" Tom adds statically, reading Alex's facial features and body language. 

"I want to go," Alex decides. "He can't hurt me," he stands up, pulling me with him. Tom nods and turns to the doctor, who lets us in. 

Alex's dad takes one glance at us and glares. The doctor clears his throat. "I'll let you privately speak, just ask if you have a problem," he says before slipping out the door, closing it behind him. 

***WARNING: Homophobic slurs ahead***

"Why the fuck is this fag here?" His asshole of a dad spits. Alex goes tense next to me. He lets go of my hand. 

"Dad!" Tom scolds. Mr.Gaskarth- no, Peter just continues to glare at Alex. He doesn't get any respect from me. I feel my entire body fill with rage. 

"No, this fucking fag destroyed my family. He ruined everything. He deserves nothing but to burn for the rest of his life," Peter spits venom. "I had a wife who did everything I wanted. I had two boys- but now... Now I have a boy and a faggot." 

"I-" Alex's hand visibly starts to shake. "I-"

"I- I-, what? Did you choose to have a stutter too? Looks like you're making a ton of choices lately!" Peter growls. "And you! Are you the fag that turned my son into this... Disgrace?!" He points his finger at me. 

"Dad-" Tom doesn't even look half as mad as me, despite his fists clenched and his face red. 

"No, I didn't, sir," I speak up, unable to stop myself at this point. Alex gulps. "I didn't do anything. In fact, when I met him, you were already out of his life. So no, I didn't make him the way he is. He was born this way. But do you want to know who he is? Who your son is?"

"No- I don't. I could care less about that fag-"

"He's the kindest, purest soul I know. Which is pretty rare when his dad is as ignorant as you. He cares about everything, pays attention to every detail, even the small ones. He's always the first one to get to you when you feel alone. He's always there, for everyone. He's was there when I needed him the most, he was there when our friend needed him, and he was there when his mom, your ex-wife, needed him the most," I interrupt him. "And you know what I love the most about him?" 

"I'd assume nothing since that's exactly what he is-"

"Everything. I love everything about him," I narrow my eyes. "I love everything about him because that's exactly what he is to me," I internally smirk when I use that bastards own words against him. "And you want to know the funniest part? Here you are, in a hospital bed because of a heart attack, and you're trying to tell your son you know what love is? I think there's a connotation behind this. And forgive me if I sound blunt, but Alex is the one standing right now, not you," I take a small step towards his bed. "And it keeps getting better because- you talk about how he's nothing. Yet he came when you needed him. He's here, right in front of you, because he found out you had a heart attack. He's here for you. Being gay doesn't fucking define him, it's just a part of him, and part of him that's always been here, and you didn't even know until he told you. And he told you because he thought he could trust you. His dad." 

"You need God. You need to learn to respect your elders! Most of all, you need to learn that romance between two boys is a sin. Also, you need to wake up from this fantasy of a life you have. Love is difficult, but love with two boys is non-existent! Both of you will burn in hell! What you call "love" is what I call bullshit." 

"You think you had love? Do you really? Because Alex's mom said that she's glad she got away from your toxic masculinity. You were nothing but a controlling ass. You beating Alex was just the last straw for her. Don't you get it? Alex isn't the one that's going to hell, you are."

"That boy you so-called "love"- is nothing. He's a waste of time, air, and most of all, he's just a shell of what a person is supposed to be," he growls. "Don't you understand? He ruined my life. I had a good life. I had a wife that did everything I told her to. I had two boys to carry on my name! But now... this... monster destroyed it all," he raises his voice. He turns to Alex. "You should go killed yourself like the way you tried to all those years ago-"

"DAD!" Tom shouts. 

I don't even remember rushing forward, until the door slams open and then closed. I stop, inches away from attacking Peter. I stare at the door. Tom starts angrily shouting at his father. 

"You know what? Alex is too good for you! You don't understand what love is, and you sure as hell don't understand basic human emotion. You're an asshole, and that's it!" I shout before storming out of the room. As soon as I do, I feel my anger flip into fear. 

Where's Alex? 

I feel a lump in my throat as I rush down a hallway, my heart pounding. I feel like I can't breathe- or maybe I'm just holding my breath. Please don't do anything stupid, Alex. Please. I sigh in relief when I hear the soft sounds of crying and stop running. I walk to the corner and see Alex, arms around his legs, knees pressed to his chest, and back against the wall, sobbing. I sit down next to him, putting my arms around him. He tenses before letting me pull him closer. He looks at me, eyes filled with tears. 

"Shhh, I'm here. It's okay," I comfort softly.

"I tried- I really thought-" he whimpers, another wave of tears washing over him, he holds me tightly. "I'm sorry." We hold each other like we're each other's lifeline. Which isn't very far from the truth. Hold it close, you never know when it can disappear.

"For what? You didn't do anything. All you did was make me realize how much I love you." 

"No- he was right. I'm nothing. Especially without you. I- I could say anything- everything I wanted to say was just stuck in my throat and- I'm sorry you had to see that." 

"You're wrong. I was being honest, Lex. You're my everything. And I could care less who your dad is. All I care about it is who hurts you so that I can hurt them back." 

"I don't deserve you," he mumbles softly. 

"And I don't deserve someone as perfect as you, and yet here we are. But I'm not letting you go. Ever." 

Alex almost laughs and pulls away slightly to look at me. "I love you."

"I love you too," I whisper back. 

A/N 

Writing the dad's part really hurt me. And I may or may not be kinda in tears for a multitude of reasons. For anyone reading this, thank you. I mean it. Thank you. I really wish that one day, people will finally start accepting people for who they are. And that what happened in this chapter never happens ever again. 

And if someone is being an ass to you, just remember, you always have the right to escape from a toxic relationship. Whether it be physically getting away or calling the police. 

I love all of you, even though I've never met some of you. 

Keep being yourself, because you're beautiful. 

~Lunar