---

Kailey's car was already far—probably farther than how I was thinking about it, but my mind was still boggling me with its theory to why she did that. I hadn't thought of what she planned. Kailey the Unpredictable. She did that to drive Peter away, and that was the only reason, Glenn, I kept on thinking.

I made sure that every step I made was silent enough not to wake my family up. Not because I didn't want to be caught but because I didn't want to ruin their sleep. If you still do not know, I do everything for their welfare. Well, kami-kami lang naman nina Mama at Papa sa bahay. The door was already locked, but I could still feel the way how Kailey drove Peter away. The walls didn't feel present, as if. It felt crazily and wildly smart; that was Kailey in high school (and until now, I can still say that). The way Peter's eyes were filled with sadness. The way Kailey's arm snaked around my waist.

Mindlessly dropping my shoulder bag on anywhere I did not think of, I walked to the bathroom to take a quick shower. A cold one. I was not really a fan of warm water, and we didn't have the automatic shower system with warm water and whatever. Wala rin akong pakialam kung mapasma ako. I just didn't care since before. I thought, Maybe, I am short of luck because tomorrow is Friday. Hindi pa umabot ng weekend ang bukas. Sayang. I did not want to see Kailey, of course. Ano naman ang gagawin ko kapag nakita ko siya? Ang awkward lang.

What will Kailey do upon seeing me? Perhaps those moves were just really done by her to make fun of Peter. Or me. Maybe she was genuinely helping me, and there was no other reason. How will she react if she sees me tomorrow? my brain goes on as my body enjoyed the maybe-stinging coldness of our aged shower's droplets.

I couldn't just avoid her at all costs. I would look really ridiculous. And that was impossible. I work with her, and we're on the same department, I thought as I switched the shower off. Really impossible.

What would happen the next day was, maybe, out of my hands, but I just had to face it. There was no other way I could escape it. Other options were wrong. I needed money to make my family proud of what I could reach. I needed work, and I wasn't going to abandon it because of some awkward feeling.

Drying my body with the towel, I changed into my pajamas and headed to my bedroom. Kailey's probably home by now, I thought, still trying to brush everything stressful out of my mind. I flicked the switch of my light on and took my shoulder bag with me as I sat on my single comfortable bed. As soon as my thighs sank in the almost flattened foam, I felt home. I mean. . . the most home. It wasn't the most luxurious bed—I never had anything that luxurious, anyway—but I surely loved it to the point I never thought of letting it go even if I would be rich. Maybe.

Without thinking about it twice, I decided to send Kailey a message.

-

-

I sent a "Thank you" message, disregarding the awkward feeling that was trying to make me stop sending a simple message. I tried to type an additional message, my cold fingertips against my phone's screen, but I ended up not doing so. Instead, I cleared all the letters with a long press. It was not my intention to make her think that I was not thankful for the fact that she helped me in making Peter go home.

So that's my Valentine's Day? I sighed. Night, the preppy girl in my head corrected.

Mabilis kong in-off ang phone ko. I still had a tomorrow waiting for me, and I hoped that it would not be a crazy day.

---

"Miss Glenn, nakita mo po ba si Miss Kailey?" Jasmine asked, holding a white folder in her hand, her fingers fidgeting subtly. I was setting my feet into an imaginary waltz under my desk until she came. "I heard you're really good friends with her. I am just thinking that maybe, you know, you can give this to her."

Jasmine was new to the company, but I didn't know that people here knew about how Kailey and I were friends. I wonder how those people looked at me. How those "popular" girls with bad attitudes (and popular twitter accounts) think of me now. For a moment, I imagined Kailey scolding them for being mean to me. The fact was. . . I wanted her to. But I didn't think she would, not after I realized what I was thinking.

Pero hindi naman masamang mangarap, 'di ba? Malay mo, matuto rin sila. Although girls like them are tough to purge. Purge—oops, sorry.

I snapped back to reality. Hard.

"Um. . . hindi ko pa siya nakikita, e," I said, trying to recall where and when I last saw her. "Sorry, Jasmine." It was last night. When she held me by my waist, when the rain poured over my city and my ex-lover, when I felt heat after she kissed me on the forehead.

"Kapag nakita ko siya, I'll let you know," I smiled.

"Sige po," she replied. "Thank you, Miss Glenn!"

"You're welcome," I said, laying my eyes back on my screen.

"Sige po," she said before I even travel back to last night's scenario. "Thank you."

She politely left—I could see it—her shoulders low and her head hung forward as if she was staring at her feet. If polite was a human, its name would be Jasmine and her hair would be Jasmine's wavy hair tied into an adorable ponytail. I moved on from the thought. I picked up my phone from my desk and realized that Kailey did not reply.

-

-

And it was making me nervous. What if she regretted what she did and decided to never talk to me because it is awkward? Man, no girl except for my mother has ever kissed me on the forehead. It was not like a forehead kiss you would get from a pretty boy. Madali kang kikiligin ka kung lalaki. But Kailey was the one who did it. I was confused, not by the kiss but by my feelings, and somehow—somehow—I felt. . . .

No.

I don't know what to do. That's the only thing.

I shook my head to shake my thoughts off like flakes of a biscuit that fall when you take a bite of it. Checking the time through my phone, I smiled. It was lunch time. Finally.

After logging my computer off, I headed to the elevator that cups everyone's ears with pressure, and you have to swallow to prevent it. And it feels good afterwards. The doors closed as soon as I entered, showing my reflection through the sleek doors. I pushed the button of the ground floor, thinking about where I would eat. Fast food chains, restaurants—I don't have money, but the truth is I just don't want to spend it. No, skip the meals. And how I would not look silly while eating alone. Although I have always done it—eating alone, I still felt the uncomfortable feeling of the public pressing me down into an insecure creature.

My mind suggested a scene, dismissing my thoughts, a scene where Kailey and I were eating together as if we were comfortable with each other despite of last night's potential energy of awkwardness. Baka nga 'di na namin maalala 'yon by the time na mangyari 'to. We were talking and laughing in the middle of sentences. But everything was set to its maximum ease. The people around did not feel heavy like they had always been for me. They felt light, in a way. They felt invisible. The restaurant was lit up by yellowish yet bright lights. We were happy. And comfortable. As if we were lovers. Magical, if I get to judge the moment.

Then my mind made up another. We were in her car; it was 7 AM. My feet are in my old, black rubber shoes, and I was listlessly stretching my legs. I was in the seat I sat on before "The Peter Show" happened. While on our way to the office, we were laughing at some joke as we drove. Probably, not even a joke Kailey would tell anyone but me. And we never cared about what any kind of person would say. Even the preppy girl in my brain. Because we were lovers.

I shook my head at the thought, careful not to shake my sanity off this time. Ano ba namang pinag-iisip ko? That's impossible.

Kailey and I wouldn't be like that.

But maybe. . . . Ugh, whatever.

The doors of the elevator opened as my mind finally shut its confusing. . . thoughts. I stepped out, my knees cold, but they were already feeling the heat of the sun. I wished I had my packed lunch, but I had none. It would be too hot when I go out, but I was going to. I had no choice.

Naalala kong wala nga pala akong dalang payong. Hindi pa ba ako natuto kagabi? Do I always need a Kailey to save me from the bad weather? Literally?

When Kailey crossed my mind again, making its way through my brain like an unfamiliar—very—curse word, I tried to push any thought about her aside. But her physical presence greeted me when I stepped out of the building. And she was with someone. I could already hear Kailey's clicking heels. It seemed impossible, though.

"Ah, kumusta ka na?" a man said, holding out a small yet elegant bouquet of flowers to Kailey. They were roses, thornless and looking quite delicate. She must be lucky.

"I am in my way to the nearest restaurant for my lunch, wanna come?" he continued. "My treat."

But instead of feeling envy because she got a suitor (while I got a horrible ex), I found myself in the middle of irritation and confusion. There was a monster inside, scratching every possible muscle or organ in my tummy, and the preppy girl who had been staying inside my head for decades was fighting it off. Believe me, I was on neither's side. Is he her suitor? The monster hissed so that I could no longer hear Preppy the Girl. A new suitor? She just said no to someone last week.

"I'm doing good, Theo," Kailey said, smiling and not minding the bouquet he was handing her. "Ngayon pa lang ako papasok. I have a really bad headache."

Her eyes, like, touched the bouquet, if they could, but never caressed it. She ignored them. Like it was not for her.

"Pero ayos ka na?" the man asked, his eyes full of concern and admiration. "How are you feeling?"

Hindi nasagot ni Kailey ang tanong ng kung sino mang Theo 'to nang makita niya ako sa gilid ng exit. And there, I realized how ridiculous I looked while staring and examining their conversation. I pictured myself looking like a radar in the expressway. Steady, lifeless, hopeless because all I'd ever be was a radar, testing everyone's speed as my job. Yikes, Glenn.

"Oh, hi there, Glenn," Kailey said and waved at me. She turned fully to me as though we hadn't pranked Peter by making him think we were something else. It was a prank, wasn't it? the preppy girl said, audible enough to overpower the monster's deep growl. But they, like, had a fusion.

"Hello," I said lowly, grinning, "Kailey." I would bet (but not really) she didn't hear it.

Kailey made a few steps towards me, and I did, too. It sounded strange to be narrated. She greeted me again with a smile. A smile with the same vibe as last night's. Mischievous yet. . . captivating.

As much as I tried not to remember that awkwardness, I knew it showed on my face, plastered like posters of some useless politicians on a dirty wall.

"Theodore, this is Glenn," Kailey said, putting her hand on my shoulder, making me remember she was actually taller than me. Even without heels, I was sure. But it didn't feel like an insult.

I like people who are taller than me.

I mean. . . whatever.

"Glenn is a very reliable co-worker and a very trusted friend," she said, her eyes on me. I looked down.

"Glenn, this is Theodore, a close friend," Kailey went on again, her other hand on Theodore's manly shoulder. I looked closely at the fabric of his suit, careful not to be obvious, and I immediately knew it was expensive. Didn't she directly say he was her suitor? Yikes to him.

Okay, fine, I'm the shortest, I thought, looking up.

Theodore eyed me. He didn't know what he had to do, and so did I. Why would Kailey introduce us to each other in the middle of their conversation? That was unexpected but not impossible. I wasn't even trying to interrupt them. There was no way I had interrupted their conversation until Kailey's presence pulled me closer as if it was alive with okay arms. What the hell is with this woman?

"Hi," Theodore smiled and took it back as if he regretted doing it. "How's your day?" If he was really a suitor of Kailey, he would keep his eyes off of any other lady, which was what he did.

I nodded as a response. I squeezed in the words "I'm good" in my action. I didn't want Kailey thinking that I was flirting with her suitor. My eyes were set on Kailey, who was beside me, and I was, like, sending her a signal that I was confused. That I wanted to leave. To my surprise, she looked back at me. At dahil doon, umiwas ako ng tingin.

"Uh, guys, I have to go," Kailey said, making my heart a drum in a fiesta of I-don't-know-what. I'm bad at friendly good-byes. "I still have work upstairs. I missed so much work, and I have to cope up. See you later, Glenn."

Before she was out of my sight, she gave me a wink. Her eyes gave me a flashback of last night's "The Peter Show."

What was that? What was that?

All on a sudden, I felt stared at. Examined. I looked around and realized that Theodore was still at my front. His neatly styled hair and his attractively tall figure were emphasized. His eyes were confused, just as I was, and there were furrows in his brows. Oh, he must be thinking about the wink Kailey gave me.

Wait. Was that wink for me or for Theodore?

Or was she making fun of Theodore through me?

"What are you, huh?" Theodore said, showing that he was really bored and curious at the same time, if that is ever possible. His eyes were beautiful, and I wasn't holding that description back. I was one step back from liking his gorgeousness.

But I should not like him.

He adjusted his tie like he was telling me about his really good profession. I felt smaller with just one gesture from him. A million tales about it, actually. Like he was a big businessman or. . . .

He was the famous son of the founder of the new and successful news channel here in the Philippines. Also, a model.

Ngayon ko lang naalala. These people are really successful, I thought. Kailan ko kaya masusuklian sina Mama? Hindi pa sapat ang mga nagawa ko sa lahat ng sakripisyo nina Mama.

"What are you?" Theodore asked again, his voice kindly demanding an answer from me. And by kindly, I meant pressure. "Kailey and you. . . ."

"Uh. . . she's my boss and—"

"What else? Like, your relationship with each other," he said, cutting me off but in a friendly way. Like he was patient and eager to know the fact from a toddler. A toddler under the pressure of reciting her first alphabet song.

"We're friends," I chuckled, sounding not-so-sophisticated. I wanted to get out of this. I wanted to have my lunch. Even if that meant eating alone.

"That's all?"

I nodded. What is he thinking? That Kailey and I are . . . . No. We're not. Of course not.

"I do my best to win Kailey's heart," he said, looking down at me. "And I'll do anything for her. Anything. Now, tell me, are you a rival of mine?"

Confirmed. He's her suitor.

The word "rival" felt heavy. Like it could send me in a boxing ring anytime soon. I knew what he meant, and it wasn't difficult to understand. Kailey was my close friend and my high school classmate. We weren't what he was thinking about us.

"Pa'no niyo naman nasabi 'yan?" I looked down. "Wala ho. Magkaibigan lang po talaga kami." He seemed nice, but it was always difficult to answer things like these.

"The way you look at her is different," he confidently answered. "And she winked at you. I don't know what that means, but. . . ."

"I'm sorry, sir," I said, my eyes fixed on his blue—very blue—tie. "We're not what you think we are."

"I don't know if you're lying," he said, his eyes directly into mine when I looked up. "Lying won't give you anything, but let me say this: May the best man win."

And he left with the bouquet still in his hand. He's joking, isn't he? If yes, it's not a good joke.

I'm not a man, sir, I wanted to say, but that Theodore had already entered his car. His expensive car, I corrected myself before Preppy the Girl slash Monster could. That was why I hate cars. They're not for me because I can't afford them.

Even if it sounds weird.

Maybe Theodore said "man" because he wanted to say I wasn't going to win, I realized.

"Miss Glenn," a voice said, so I turned around, almost tripping. Jasmine was greeting me with a friendly smile and an adorable ponytail.

"Hello po! Ayos lang po ba kung kasama ko kayo kumain?"

"Oo naman. No need to ask. Let's go!"

I guess I don't have to eat alone.

---