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"Pero Miss Glenn, ang ganda po talaga ni Miss Kailey, 'no?" Jasmine said as we listlessly walked away from the fast-food restaurant where we just ate our lunch. I was thankful I got to eat lunch with her. Because of her pretty little question, I guess, the people wouldn't unconsciously make me an insecure creature anymore.

Tama naman si Jasmine. Kailey is, like, the one you can always cast all your envy upon. She's also the one you can choose as a role model. A girl with success in both of her hands—her fingers securing them effortlessly—and even ahead of her. A girl a lot of guys like. Head-over-heels type, mostly.

"I do my best to win Kailey's heart." I sighed as Theo's words rang inside my head, every vowel echoing louder than the consonant sounds—a bit strangely reminding me of his captivating eyes looking down on me and of his intimidating eagerness to know what I was to Kailey.

"And I'll do anything for her. Now, tell me, are you a rival of mine?" Heavy, again.

"Uh. . . Miss Glenn?" I wasn't able to push my thoughts out of my head, but as I heard Jasmine's polite tone, it was the one that pushed them aside. "Ayos lang po ba kayo?"

"Yes," I quickly nodded. "Ayos lang po ako. Maganda si Kailey."

"Uh, opo," Jasmine giggled.

I gasped upon realizing what I just said. That's true though.

Disregarding any other thing that might keep me outside of our workplace longer, we made our way quicker. Jasmine is a quick mover, I guess. She walked like my Papa when he was younger. Mabibilis at malalaki ang mga hakbang niya. I wondered what were her biggest dreams. Probably because actions or body language indeed tell a lot? I don't even really know if what I am thinking is correct. Our lunch break wasn't over yet, but I just somehow felt like I should be there already.

But I did not want to be there yet. Of course.

If I could gather more legal reasons for not being seen in the office, I would use them. I just had to stay out of Kailey's sight, Preppy the Girl and Monster imitated my voice, making the truth I had not admitted sound so. . . so dumb. Ever since Preppy merged with the monster that was born just an hour ago, she sounded stronger. Preppy made a better and more effective job of stuffing harsh truths about my thoughts, in my nose, if that is ideally and factually proper. See? Even my words don't sound okay right now, I thought with a strong feeling of gratitude after Preppy cannot be heard for the time being.

To summarize my lunchtime, as if it is needed like those papers you had to write in high school (about how you spent your summer or Christmas vacation well), masarap kasama si Jasmine; she was extremely friendly and polite. Magaan ang atmosphere habang nag-uusap kami, and we talked about a few things that matter, especially family. Nabanggit niyang kinupkop siya ng isang mayamang pamilya, which was so lucky of her, although that might sound a little bit of cliché when compared to some of the well-known TV series.

"Miss Glenn, oo nga po pala," ang sabi ni Jasmine, habang ang mga mata niya ay nasa screen ng phone niya. "Okay lang po ba kung samahan niyo ako sa office ni Miss Kailey? May ibibigay lang po ako. Never pa po akong nakapunta roon nang mag-isa." She looked at me.

"Sure," I said, "no problem."

Although I knew that she dodges the thought of Kailey's vibe being kind of bad for the health of her confidence, her words were shocking but not purely unbelievable. Kailey may be gorgeous, but she can be scary. . . precisely like how some high school teachers can be.

"May nakalimutan po kasi siyang folder sa table ko kahapon," she said, making me recall the white folder in her fidgety hand earlier. Was that folder that folder?

"Sige, sige," I quickly replied. "I think I know why you don't want to go alone."

Yumuko si Jasmine nang bahagya. Then, she giggled, "She looks so bossy po."

"I can't blame you," I said, chuckling. "She is a boss."

"Close naman po kayo, 'di ba?" she asked.

At first, I didn't know how to answer that question. Kasi. . . hindi kami sobrang close. Maybe sobrang close namin in her eyes since she doesn't have much friends. Harsh, Preppy the Monster mumbled. Harsh naman talaga ako sa pagkakasabi ko no'n. Sorry.

"Close naman. Medyo," I answered. "Pero no'ng nasa high school pa lang kami, hindi masyado. Parang—"

"Magkaklase po kayo dati?" Jasmine asked, her eyes wide. "S-sorry to cut you off po." Then, she held out a peace sign.

"Ay, nag-sorry," I laughed. "Hayaan mo 'yon."

"Pa'no po dati? Parang ano?"

"Parang normal lang kaming magkaklase," I said. "Walang interaction masyado. Pero katabi ko siya no'n for a whole year."

"How is she like po?" she asked again, but you would always feel so patient.

"Ano. . . ." I uttered, trying to word the things in my head. "Tahimik siya. Tapos wala siya masyadong kinakausap except for her close friends."

"Nakakausap mo po siya palagi?"

"Yeah," I said. "So I guess. . . medyo close kami noon. Pero ewan."

We were already halfway to the office. It made me frown. Ayaw ko pang makarating doon.

"Siguro po sikat siya sa school niyo, 'no?" Jasmine said, her eyes staring off into the distance.

"Hindi rin," I answered, quite surely. "Hindi masyado. But she told me once that she want to be famous within the campus. Pero mas kilala siya kaysa sa akin, syempre. She's a better student."

Ouch, Preppy said again, mocking me by imitating my voice. What the hell.

"Ah," ang tanging sagot ni Jasmine.

We stopped talking for seconds, the silence following us as we strode. Until one second, it vanished.

"Nakakainggit po ba maging kaklase si Miss Kailey?"

I was quite taken aback by her question. Well, yes would be my answer. Sobra, if you ask me.

"I mean. . . parang. . . ." Jasmine said.

"I get it," I said, trying to laugh it off. "Medyo. Oo."

"H-how's it like po?"

"It was a bad feeling," I said. "Never naging okay 'yon. I always tried to compare myself to her."

Jasmine could only nod. Without looking at me. Like she was sorry.

And she mustn't be at all.

"But now," I continued. "I look at her as a role model. And it helped me more when I started thinking about it that way." I wasn't so sure about that. I still get jealous; I know that.

Nang maglakad kami papalapit pa sa office, wala akong ibang maisip kung hindi ang humiling na sana ay wala na ang Theodore Hidalgo na 'yon. I didn't want to answer his crazy questions about me. . . and Kailey.

Thinking about how he was suspecting our friendship that he probably didn't even know much about, I sighed. Baka gano'n lang talaga ang mga lalaki kapag dedicated. They go. . . praning.

I felt a calm wave of ease coursing through my toes—ideally ridiculous, by the way—as I realized that he just left earlier with his car. But wait. Am I really his rival when it comes to Kailey? What if what Kailey did really means something else?

And why did Kailey invite me to go out on the night of Valentine's?

Why did she choose to make fun of my ex-boyfriend by kissing me on the forehead? Of all the friendlier things she could do.

That's friendly, Preppy mumbled.

Why did she give a wink that I could think of as something for me when her suitor was around?

What if she rejects all of those men continuously because she likes me?

Oh, my goodness! Stop assuming, Glenn. Your guesses are going wild!

I had to shake my head to rise up from my (probably) shallow yet drowning thoughts. Good thing, Jasmine couldn't see anything inside my head. Ayaw kong may ibang makaalam, of course, kung ano man ang naisip ko. At kung tama man ang mga naisip ko, nakakatakot pa ring malaman ng iba.

Maaari nila akong husgahan. And that could get scary. I mean. . . it really is.

"Miss Glenn, pasama po ako, ah?" Jasmine said. Oh, boy. I almost forgot that I had to accompany Jasmine to Kailey's office. I don't wanna see her again, I selfishly thought. After last night. And earlier.

I just nodded and said, "Sure. Sure."

"Parang kinakabahan po talaga ako, e," she giggled, shaking her hands in front of her. Cute.

As if it took no time, we were already out of the elevator, and as its doors opened, I inhaled, keeping more oxygen possible inside my lungs. What I was doing and thinking looked like a stupid—really, really stupid preparation laid down on an athlete's table. Is that correct? Do athletes have that kind of table where they lay their blueprints? Or is it their coaches who have those?

You know what, don't mind me. My thoughts are insane, not me.

Not you yet, Preppy smirked, annoying me with her presence. . . again.

My brain whispered to me that I was too overreacting, that I should stop being so. Like my brain was another persona different from Preppy.

But no. It could almost always shock everyone if their friend kissed them on their forehead. Sweetly.

It was done sweetly, isn't it?

But it's a prank, dudette, Preppy the Monster said peacefully despite its hybrid image in my head.

Rolling my eyes at myself and at Preppy, I followed Jasmine as she made her way to her neatly organized table. Her fingers landed on the surface of the white folder that she was holding before I went downstairs.

I wondered what that was and what that was for.

We then walked to Kailey's office as I kept my distance from her in order to, somehow, have more distance from Kailey's office. Crazy how far awkwardness can take you, Preppy whispered as if she really did right near my ear, not just inside my cranium. I reckoned that Jasmine was less nervous about going to Kailey's office than I was. Wait.

Of course, she isn't nervous. Maybe, for a bit, she is, but just like what my brain suggests, I am just. . . overreacting, and that is the very reason why I am nervous.

Jasmine knocked on the door of Kailey's office so gently that I thought Kailey wouldn't be able to hear it. I thought. Soon enough, Kailey's voice, like, floated through the air and pierced through the walls when we heard her say, "Come in."

I didn't bother to come in Kailey's office anymore. Not just because I didn't want to and I never really planned to but also because Jasmine didn't seem to mind that I didn't come in with her. Like a little girl training to ride a bike, I allowed her to go on her own even if it might wound her knees.

"Uh, Miss Kailey, good day po," she said as I was just there, standing outside the room like a spy, which is kind of creepy by the way I worded it. And it made my tummy feel a sensation close to cringing. Well, that was really cringey and creepy.

"Nalapag niyo po yata 'tong folder na 'to sa desk ko po kahapon," ang sabi ni Jasmine. "Hindi ko po agad nabigay. Sorry po." She giggled awkwardly.

" 'Di ko po kasi kayo nakita kanina," Jasmine added.

I peeked through the gray-tinted glass panes along the doorway of Kailey's office, and well, she was just sitting on her chair. She didn't see me. Hopefully. Letting her see me being shy was not really my plan. Ew, Glenn. Mukha kang tanga, I thought, delicately shocked by the (another) thought of me, not Preppy, saying it to myself.

"Thank you, Jasmine," Kailey smiled and looked away. "I forgot that I placed it there. Thank you."

"You're welcome po," she replied, and I saw her bowing her head the slightest.

Just as Jasmine exited Kailey's office, her small feet cautiously stepping on the sleek floor, a woman in a corporate uniform knocked on the half-opened door, holding a familiar bouquet of flowers. The last time I saw that, it was in the hands of an eager suitor, an eager dead bush, an eager Theodore. She entered, leaving the door a bit opened.

"Ma'am, good morning po," I heard the girl say. "Galing po kay Mr. Hidalgo."

"Thank you, Miss Glenn," Jasmine laughed, but I just nodded as a "you're welcome" and partly ignored her. Bad, Preppy the Monster said. But I ignored her.

My eyes left the lady holding a bouquet of flowers. Jasmine already made her steps away from Kailey's office, so I followed her. Kailey forgot that she placed her no-one-knows-what-is-inside folder on Jasmine's table. Theodore forgot to give the bouquet of flowers to the girl she loves. (I can laugh my lungs out at the latter one.)

I guess successful people still forget things like I do.

I wish I can be successful, too, I said right down to Preppy, as if it was something with an ability to make her fall on her backside while feeling down because of all that I said. She didn't move an inch as I strode away and away from Kailey's office.

Just like that, even with the inspirational "we are all humans" thought behind my thoughts, my self-esteem and my world, like, shrank into bite-sized ones. A bite-sized one that successful people could hold. A bite-sized one that people like Kailey and Theodore could hold.

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