I've ignored the knocks on my door. There's no motivation to get up. I know I should help outside, but there's nothing in me today to get a move on. There's people out there to replace me anyway. I'm laying down in the comfort of my bed, unable to stop the frown that takes off my lips.

It appears the knocking has come to a halt causing a moment of silence. This is until the door opens and footsteps become louder. I glance to the door, rolling over onto my other side.

The bed dips down from their weight as they sit on the edge. I don't dare look back.

There's an awkward silence in the room. I don't care if they believe I'm sleeping or not. I don't question it either.

"I know you're awake." Garroth. "I know it's hard, but you should get up. The distraction would be good for you."

I roll back over, looking up at him. Kandi's standing next to him. That explains why Garroth knew how to get in.

I look like a mess. My hair is everywhere, and I can feel the scatter of it from the top of my head. I wonder if I've drooled, or if it's evident that I haven't gotten much sleep lately.

I try to pull my blankets further up on my body, covering myself up more from Garroth. It becomes a struggle as his weight prevents it from happening.

"How long have I kept myself away?" I ask.

I've lost track of the days since Vylad left. Laying in bed, I've tried to piece together why things were the way they were. Vylad has always been complicated with his decisions. I've never tried to understand them. But with Laurance, he was my brother. I knew he was going through a rough time, but I feel as though there were things that I wasn't being told. That there was more to the story than what I was allowed to see.

"About a week or so. We miss seeing your smiling face." At that moment I could tell he was beginning to regret his words, finding it too late to try and get me to move on. "Erm. . . We miss seeing you. Lilith misses her play buddy. Kandi doesn't seem to be enough for her."

Kandi's elbow becomes one with Garroth's side. It's clear to see she's offended by his words, but she doesn't make a sound. She's always been good at this. Determining when it's the right time to speak and when it isn't. I understand Laurance's attraction to her.

I don't respond. Lilith won't remember the times I have played with her when Zoey would go on a break. Kandi's always been there. There's no need for me to be. I snuggle closer into my pillow to hide my face.

"Remember when you told me about how my mother was to be executed?" I don't understand where he is going with this. I had gone out after hearing the news desperate for a breath of fresh air. I wanted to find Laurance, but I was instead wandering aimlessly and fell into Garroth. It was then that I told him the news. I felt horrible for it. "I've thought about this for a while. . . You told me that information even if it would hurt me, but we've kept a secret from you."

My attention perks. Slowly, I try to sit up in the bed, giving up on the blankets and sheets that fall onto my lap. Garroth adjusts his position and looks at me. "A secret?" I whisper.

"Vylad had told us a little while ago about this thing called the Calling. . . He would've been able to explain it better than I ever could. But we've begun to think that he may have gone to the nether because of it."

My mouth opens as my heart beats out of my chest. Why would they keep such a secret from me? I trusted them all, and they kept this a secret.

". . . W-Why?"

"Well, I thought of it as some form of homesickness, but Vylad-" the look on my face alerts him that that wasn't what I was looking for. "We didn't want to worry you more than you are now. Look Alex, looking back that was a stupid mistake. We should've told you, but we were scared it would hurt you."

"I'm not a flower, Garroth. I'm not going to die because of not enough sunlight," I say, sighing. I look down at my hands. "I'm not a little kid either. . . I can handle rough times. I just. . . I just wish you would've told me about this instead of letting me think that my brother just ran away to run away. I would've understood more! Am I the last to know again? Like when Vylad left?"

Kandi and Garroth share a look before she slowly nods her head.

At this point, I'm unsure if I'm more angry or upset. Angry because I wasn't told. And when I was told, I was last to know once again. Vylad never told me. Upset because of how everything turned out. Perhaps I had always relied on Laurance too much where I was going to fall when he was gone. I should've been more independent than what I thought I was.

I try to get out of bed. Garroth stands, his hands out to me if I need to grab onto them. I ignore them as I walk to my dresser, trying to find some clothes to wear for the day.

I don't wish to go outside and be reminded that Laurance is gone. Though, there's the side of me where I know it's my duty to try and help everyone in the best possible way possible.

I turn around with my dress clutched to my chest, ready for the day. Garroth looks at me for a moment before sighing. He grabs the dress from my hands and places it on my bed.

Before I know it, I'm held in his arms. My eyes close as I wrap my arms around him tightly. I didn't know how much I needed a hug until it was given to me. "You're always the one telling me how sorry you are for my misfortunes, but no one ever returns it to you. Alex I'm. . . I'm so sorry. For everything. For Laurance leaving and for not telling you before. I'm so sorry."