Capricorn
Chapter 57

Wood Element's Positive/Negative Effects -
Chinese Astrology Wood Signs (Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon)
* compassionate/frustrated
* resourceful/bad-tempered
* cooperative/squandering
* expansive/unexpressive
* inspired/excessive
* sociable/violent
* extroverted/angry
* problem-solving/pessimistic
* ethical/temperamental

*

Adena opened the door before Daria pulled the car to a stop. They were in front of the office building that housed WKNA. She found it. "Do you want me to wait?" she asked her. It was dark, and the streetlights here hadn't been attended to in some time; half were out. 

"No, thank you so much," Adena said as she looked up at the tall building. Most of the building was dark, except for the 3rd floor. The address said Suite 300. 

"You sure? I can make a few rounds around the block?"

"I'm sure as this 5-star review I'm about to give you," Adena said. She didn't need to say anymore.

"Have a nice night, Miss Capricorn," Daria said, driving off. 

After she submitted her rating, she called Craig, but it went straight to voicemail. Shit. 

Hey, wyd, are you busy?

She paced in front of the building, but her text went unanswered. Shit. She sighed and then bent down and picked up some gravel. She threw a few at the 3rd-floor windows or tried to. She kept missing. A few lucky ones hit, and she waited. She didn't want to stand out here all night, but she would if she had to. She pulled on the front door, and of course, it was locked. She wondered if there was a back door that may be open.

Then the front door was opened, and Adena looked forward expectantly. However, it was a security officer. "Ma'am, was that you throwing rocks at the window?"

"Yes-"

"We're recording up there, and those were some big rocks you threw. You trying to break a window?"

"Sorry, I'm here to see Craig. I need to speak with him."

The security guard paused, "He's recording right now. He can't be disturbed."

"Please? It'll be really quick. Or can I come in? I'll be quiet, no rock throwing, I promise."

"Ma'am, I gotta do my job, which is to keep this building safe and all the people inside it and to never let anyone in after hours," he said to her. "He gets off at 2 am."

"What am I going to do for 4 hours?" Adena said out loud, which surprised the guard. Was she willing to wait?

"What's your name?" he asked her, going off on a hunch.

"Adena, tell him Adena is here. He knows me, I swear. I'm not a fan or anything like that. I am his biggest fan, but I'm not one of the crazy ones. Can you tell him?"

"I'll send a message," he said and then spoke with someone through his walkie-talkie. 

"Thanks, thank you."

"I'll stay here. You know it's dark out here. You shouldn't be out around here by yourself, you know."

"Well, if you let Craig talk to me, I won't be. By myself."

The officer chuckled. Yep, it was her. The girl Craig went on and on about. He finally made his first dedication to her on air, and here she was on their front stoop. What are the chances? He would let her in if his boss wasn't an asshole, but he had bills to pay.

Adena paced outside the building as they both waited. Then all of a sudden, the security officer closed the door. "Hey! Wait!"

When the door opened again, there he was. Craig was just as surprised to see her. "Dena? What are you doing here?" he asked her. The next thing he knew, she was in his arms. Her arms wrapped around his neck, holding him close, smelling like the perfume she always wore and looking beautiful like she always did. He hugged her back and was grateful she was there. He played a song for her, and God plopped her right where he wanted her to be. He had a whole playlist dedicated to her, but he was so popular because he let his listeners pick what they wanted to hear. 

"I saw your sister, and she's been hounding me about actually leaving the hospital and getting fresh air blah blah blah. So, I get in an Uber, they're flipping through the stations, and I hear you. I recognized your voice instantly, DJ CD," she said with a smile. 

"You saw Bev?" he asked her.

"Yeah, she's been coming around, keeping me company and bringing me real food. She's trying to make me fat."

"I can tell you lost weight."

"I just had a baby, Craig," Adena said with a chuckle. "I couldn't keep anything down after all that happened the first few days."

"I'm happy you're here," he said as he hugged her again. 

"Congratulations, I didn't know you were on the radio. I'm proud of you," she said in his ear. 

"I told you, didn't I?" he asked with surprise, and she shook her head no. "Really?"

"All of our conversations have been short. Lately, you've been a busy guy," she said as she pulled away. Their conversations consisted of her checking in, asking how his day was, he would ask for an update and ask how she was doing, and then he'd disappear. They would have the same conversation the next day, and the day after, they didn't know what to say or where to begin. The conversation they needed to have was better to have in person.

And here she was. 

"Sorry," Craig said, "I have to admit that's on purpose." Adena gave him a questioning look. "With Terrell back in your life, I've kept you at a distance. Trying not to get attached again, but who am I kidding? It looks like you guys worked things out?"

Adena chuckled. "You have 'T' names for days. You'll never call him by his actual name, will you?"

"Never," Craig said. 

"'Terrell' and I aren't back together. Never will be. He tried. He did want to be, and he claims he still loves me even though he's still with...Kiki."

"Kiki?"

"I'll never say 'Kim' ever again. It'll be good for me," she said, winking at him. He laughed. "He went to great lengths, taking me to my Lamaze classes, taking me out to eat, trying really hard, but it was all for show. And I don't have feelings for him anymore. I stopped loving him a long time ago."

"Oh, was that why he was with you that night?" Craig asked her. She nodded. "I could tell something had happened, though. My favorite lipstick of yours was on his face," he said lowly. He remembered how disgusted and heartbroken he felt when he saw it. He was soon distracted because he was such an asshole, and with everything going on, it's stayed with him since that night. 

Adena sighed, "He had me confused for a second there. Hormones, I guess. I almost gave in. Loneliness. I missed being wanted, but I didn't miss him at all. He was saying all the right things, but he's been 'ordered' to stay away from me, thankfully. I think he was trying to convince himself we could be a 'family' more than he was trying to convince me."

"He didn't hurt you?" Craig asked her. She shook her head no. "Good. So, what about Kehinde Wiley?" he asked her. She looked at him questioningly. It was all starting to pour out—all the questions he's wanted to ask since June. 

"What about him?"

"Remember that night I randomly texted you saying we needed to talk and that I was coming over?"

"Yeah, and you never came," Adena said lowly as she crossed her arms.

"I sent that before I saw you two. At dinner together. Holding hands," he said with a sigh. "I figured, well, she's going to be busy tonight. That's why I never showed. I was sure you would move on with someone else when I left. I saw how Kehinde looked at you anyway. I didn't know who exactly. Everyone was a suspect."

"We're just business partners. Not partners. I'm not attracted to him like that. He was there for me when you left, but after our event went so well, he decided to go into business with me."

Craig sighed. "I'm really happy for you. When will that happen?"

"After Thumbelina gets on her feet. I can't think about it right now. He's taking care of everything right now," she said. "What you saw might've looked like a date, but he was proposing something else entirely."

"How is Thumbelina?"

"She's progressing. All she does is sleep, though. We have a little routine; I've started breastfeeding, and she gained 2 pounds. Everyone's really positive."

"You do look different from when I last saw you. I'm glad you got out to get some air and used that time to see me," he said as he held her hand. "You got a name for Thumbelina yet?"

"I have to. They're starting to hound me more and more, especially now that she's improving. I still don't want to get my hopes up." He nodded. "But I think I found one."

"You did?"

"I've always loved the name 'Dana.' I'm going to spell it differently, though. Grandma loved that name too."

"Dana Capricorn," Craig said, "That sounds beautiful."

"I've been wondering about the middle name the last few days. A name keeps popping up, but I need to get permission first."

"Permission?"

"Yeah, so...if it's ok with you, I think Dayna Amanda Capricorn would be a beautiful name for her?" 

Craig stood stock still, not knowing what to say. Adena gulped. Did she overstep? Was it too soon? Then he pulled her close to him and kissed her hungrily. She got her answer. 

When they came up for air, Craig blinked back the tears. Goddamn, it's been a very emotional few weeks. "It's fine with me, and I think it's beautiful. Why?"

"Remember that dream I had? About Amanda? Convincing me to keep the baby? I'll never forget it. Ever. Her advice convinced me—or solidified what I wanted and not what would make sense or make my life easier. I'm going to ask Beverly next time I see her. I hope she agrees."

"I'm pretty sure she will," Craig said as he held her close and kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Adena."

"I love you too. That's why I'm here. I wanted you to know that. I never stopped loving you, ever."

"I never stopped loving you either. You've become such a huge part of me. When you hurt, I hurt. That's what made that night so surreal for me."

"What made you come by that night?" Adena asked him. "It was dangerous to be out, period."

"When the lights went out, I was at Ron's. Missy was there too. I rummaged through every nook and cranny of the apartment to find candles, lighters, batteries, and flashlights. I find a small gift bag in the closet next to the front door under this pile of stuff. I opened it, and I was shocked and happy to see it was from you," he said. He reached under his shirt and pulled out a diamond chain with 'ABC' on it. Adena smiled. "Amanda, Beverly, Craig. I love it. Thank you so much. I've been wearing it every day." He held her close and kissed her more.

"I'm glad you love it. I thought you may have hated it. I never heard anything back about it after I dropped it off. I shouldn't have given it to her," Adena said.

"Her? Her who?"

"The fake Nicki Minaj that moved in. Was that the chick Ron worked with?"

"No, she was dating the girl that worked with Ron. She didn't mention anything to me. I can't believe she hid it. Fucking bitch."

"Jealousy," Adena said. "I could tell when I told her the gift was for you. You two had something going on?"

Craig sighed. It was best to come clean. "Yeah, it was a mistake, a one-time mistake. Never again. I was under the influence and didn't care about life then. I blacked out. I took ten steps backward. Doing the same dumb shit I swore I would never do again."

"Yeah, Missy kept me updated now and then. You're ok now, right? You still doing that stuff?"

"No. I quit after that encounter."

"Beverly said you replaced that stuff with work. She's worried about you."

"She said that? When?"

"A couple of hours ago," Adena said. "Take it from someone who loves to overwork herself. You can't pour from an empty cup. It can kill and affect everyone around you when you don't care for yourself."

Craig shook his head. "Yeah, I know. After I fulfill all the commitments I made, I'm going to stop doing that too. Thanks to this gig, I'm getting to a place where money isn't such a huge problem," he said as he looked at his watch. He needed to get back.

"How did this happen anyway?"

"They saw me at the Grammy's party."

"I knew that would bring a good opportunity to you. You're unforgettable. I wish I were there to see it."

"Maybe you can see me do it next year. It's not the same party, but I'm already booked for another one." Adena kissed him again, and it was hard for them to stop and come up for air. They had so much making up to do. He forced himself to pull away, "As much as I want to stay, I need to get back."

Though it depressed her, she understood. "Can I ask you one more thing?" she asked him. 

"Anything."

"I still love you and miss you so much. I was wondering if we could start over. Start again?"

There it was. The question he hoped she would ask or that he would have a chance to ask. However... "I've been waiting months for you to say that. As much as I want to, I think we shouldn't..."

Adena's heart fell to the bottomless pit of her stomach. 

*

Surefooted and thoroughly practical, in the end, the Capricorn goat always reaches the heights, beating others who are faster but less determined.

*

She tried to hold back her tears. "Can I ask why?"

"I want to. I'm not saying never, just not right now. We didn't work out because it was too soon after our breakups and the aftermath was even more complicated. We both have baggage and demons, and we're still hurting. I want to love you like you deserve to be loved. If you're willing to wait for me," he said to her as he wiped the one tear that fell down her face. He was breaking his heart saying that, but he knew it was for the best.

"You sound like my therapist. She would agree with you," Adena said sadly. "We jumped into something serious too soon."

"I fell in love with you the moment I saw you. You've been on my mind every day since. You were a beautiful distraction from what I needed to work on. It's starting to be a detriment to keep putting that off. As you said, you can't pour from an empty cup." Adena nodded. "Supposedly, I need a therapist myself."

"I know I'm staying with mine, and I have so much to unpack from this last month alone. I think it would be good for you. If it could help Taye, it would help you. I'm glad you're considering it."

"Can't help but think about it with Beverly dropping hints every other day. However, she's worse off than I was after Amanda, and she's been suggesting family counseling for the both of us. It'll be good for us."

Adena smiled, "I think that's perfect."

"Once I'm healed, I'm sweeping you off your feet if you'll let me."

"I would love to be swept," Adena smiled, blinking back tears. 

"We can start over, just slowly. Ok? It doesn't mean I don't love you anymore. That's not the case. I think I love you more today than I ever have. You've been through so much, and here you are. Healing," he said. Just then, the security officer peeked out and nodded for him to come back inside. "Shit, I gotta go," he said, and Adena nodded. He held her close. He kissed her cheek and then on the lips. He had to force himself to pull away again. "Call an Uber. I'm not leaving you out here by yourself."

Just then, a car pulled up. It was Daria. "I did another drop-off around the corner and was just making sure you were still here."

"You're just in time. I need to get back," Adena said to her gratefully. She turned to Craig, and he kissed her again passionately. "It's going to be hard just to be friends with you."

"It's going to be harder for me, believe me," he said as he caressed her cheek. "I'll call you. We'll do lunch, dinner, and dessert, this week. Yeah?" She nodded eagerly. "I love you," he said as he helped her into the car.

"I love you too," she said, smiling at him. She felt lighter than air now. Things were going to be ok. 

"Tell little Dayna Amanda I said hello," he said and then closed the door. Then they pulled off, and he stood there watching them until the car disappeared before returning inside.

"Same station?" Daria asked her.

"Please," she said. Once she turned back to it, Jill Scott started blaring out of the speakers. She smiled and sighed with relief. This may be the first night in weeks that she would sleep through the night without medication. 

Then her phone rang. It was the hospital. She had been gone for an hour. They were probably checking on her. "Hi, had a little detour. I'm on my way back now."

"Adena? You there?"

"Yes, did you hear me-"

"Hurry as fast as you can. We just left a message for your parents as well."

Adena's heart dropped to the floor. "Why? Did something happen? Is she ok? Is Dayna ok?"

"Unfortunately, there's been some developments after you left."

"Developments? Speak plainly. What is going on?"

"Just get here as fast as you can, Miss Capricorn. This happens sometimes. We're so sorry, but you may need to start preparing yourself."

All the color left her face as she hung up without another word. "I need you to return to the hospital as fast as possible. Now! Please!" Adena said. Daria noticed the change in her and drove as fast as she could.

It was the longest ride of her life. She clambered out of the Uber, ran into the hospital and straight to the elevator, and paced anxiously as it ascended to the 7th floor. She ran straight to her room. She looked at Dayna's crib. It was empty. A few nurses came in. "What happened? What happened? Where is she?" she asked as she started to sob.

*

The cardinal signs must put their resources to good use. Earth resources represent practical skills: material, financial, and social resources that can be used to further an ambition.

*

https://youtu.be/s29BrxL1Kxc