Capricorn
Chapter 2

Capricornian Lucky Connections
Colors: green, black, gray, indigo, violet
Plants: yew, ash, hemp, weeping willow
Perfume: musk
Gemstones: jet, black diamond, onyx, ruby
Metal: lead
Tarot Card: the devil
Animals: goat, donkey

*

"How couldn't it have been lipstick?" Missy Evans, one of Adena's best friends, asked. Adena has been working through her lunch for weeks, but today she couldn't concentrate and needed a break. The stain on Taye's shirt, their fight, and the fact that he didn't come home til 4:30 am played on repeat in her mind. She had to sort this out. So she called her girls. They were more than happy and also relieved to meet up with her. It's been weeks since their last lunch, and they worried she was overworking herself. So when Adena texted them, they didn't hesitate. However, they didn't expect her to say any of this. They thought she would talk about work, Donatella, and update them on Taye. And wow, what an update they got. They were shocked. This didn't sound like Taye at all. But if it were true, they would all be heartbroken.

"That's a common mistake that guys make. Every woman seems to find lipstick on their guy; it never fails, "Kimberly Madison said with a sigh. "My 3 o'clock the other day is going through the same thing. I've heard this story countless times, and it's disappointing." 

The three of them met on Columbia's campus. Kim and Missy were Adena's freshmen roommates and stayed roommates until graduation. They were friends instantly. They went through a lot together, and they were there when Adena met Taye, fell in love with Taye, and were her bridesmaids at their wedding. They all were close, Taye included; he was an honorary part of their 'girl gang.' Just don't say it out loud. Kim finished her Master's in Mental Health Counseling and was currently doing a supervised internship, so Adena needed her perspective. 

She paused. "Unless he wanted you to see it, "Kimberly said, "Maybe that's his messed up way of telling you, 'Hey Adena, I'm not happy. We need to fix this, or THIS will keep happening.'"

"He's not happy?! Hell, I'm not happy either! I'm tired. All the time. He just plays video games."

"That doesn't mean he's happy," Kim said. "It's more than likely a coping mechanism."

"For what?!"Adena asked.

"Losing his job, for starters," she said. "Are you not happy, Adena?"

"I'm not happy with this."

"Ok, well, without the lipstick stain on his shirt, are you happy otherwise?"

Adena paused. She didn't want to say it out loud because she wasn't sure. Things could be better, but she didn't think they were so far gone to the point that they weren't happy with each other.

"Girl, eat!"Missy said, "You haven't touched that bland ass salad. Are you sure you don't want a burger? You need meat, protein, and fuel. You sure you don't want a shot?"

"I'm going back to work, Missy."

"Ok, some wine?"Missy asked her. 

Missy tended to use alcohol and partying as a coping mechanism. This worried Kim and Adena sometimes, but she was still functioning. Though indecisive about what she wanted, she did what she had to. For someone who parties, drinks, and smokes as much as she does, she can still get up and go to work. She was just a party animal and wasn't serious about life yet. She enjoyed being a "real adult" by partying and "doing whatever the fuck I want." 

After changing her major almost every semester, she finally decided to get a Liberal Arts degree. It was broad enough so that when she graduated, she had a lot of options when it came to working in her field, and it kept her parents happy. She almost dropped out a few times and couldn't handle the pressure. She only went to college for social activities, not going to class. But she was the first in her family to go to college, so she couldn't let them down, even though she didn't know where her passions lied yet and that college was their dream, never hers.

"She doesn't want to drink, Missy," Kim said.

"Ok, fine, it will relax you."Missy shrugged as she drank her Long Island Iced Tea.

"The last thing I need is to walk back in there smelling like alcohol and Donatella smelling it."

"Forget about work now. Worry about that when you get back. You didn't answer my question," Kim prodded.

"What? About him making out with some girl to get my attention?"

"That's some straight-up bullshit. If he made out with somebody, it's because he's a selfish asshole. He wasn't thinking about Adena at all," Missy said, "Miss me with that reverse psychology bullshit."

"Right. Why can't he just talk to me?" Adena asked. "Why does he need to go out and do that?"

"He's not man enough to talk to you," Kimberly said with a roll of her eyes. Missy agreed with an exaggerated "mmhmm."

"Don't. Don't say that. I still love him. He's man enough for me...he just, he's struggling right now," Adena said.

"Girl, don't make excuses for him," Missy said.

"Maybe he's going through an early mid-life crisis. 'Adulting' is stressful. It never ends. Or he's just craving that college life again? Drinking, going out, no curfew," Kim suggested and glanced at Missy.

"I saw that, "Missy said. "I don't miss college. I'm not having a mid-life crisis. I'm fine."

"I didn't say anything. Why are you getting so defensive?"

"Kim, please, you know what you were doing-"

"Do you think he regrets marrying me?" Adena interrupted. 

If he missed being a college student, he probably missed being single. The two met their first year and hit it off great and fast. By the end of their senior year, he proposed. They all graduated together, and a few months later, they had a small wedding ceremony and a romantic honeymoon in Bermuda. Did they move too fast? 

"I mean before we started going steady and before he got that internship which ended up getting him that job...he just partied all the time...hell, we met at a party...it's like he's taking steps backward."

"I don't think he regrets marrying you," Missy said. "He just wants to be married to you and wants to have fun....but the fun is getting to his head. You said so yourself; he said he's enjoying the fact that he got fired now and liked the free time."

"Bottom line is...talk to him. Lemme give you a few numbers. You two should talk to a marriage counselor. And before you say anything, it's ok. A lot of young couples do. It's very common now. Some feel like they can't handle the pressures of marriage but don't want to leave. It's ok to ask for help, Adena. That's what I recommend," Kimberly said. Adena figured she would say that, but she would try anything now.

"But..." Then she paused; she was almost afraid to say it out loud. To ask a stupid question like this. "Ok...so what if he says, 'Yes, Adena...I cheated on you, and what you saw was so and so's lipstick...'" Adena said.

"Um...leave him!"Missy said.

"No. I can't...divorce is not an option. I hate divorce. We said for better or worse, til death do us part...DEATH do us part," Adena said.

"Well, if he admits it...you two have to talk about it. But would you want to stay with a man that cheats on you? This is all so messed up cuz Taye is better than that. Adena, you are better and deserve so much more than that," Kimberly told her.

"Divorce would be such an embarrassment. Everyone would know that we failed," Adena said. Imagine all the conversations behind their backs...

"Embarrassment is better than being unhappy," Kimberly said.

*

Inside anyone who has strong Capricornian influences is a person who worries about security – physical, social, and emotional. A typical Capricorn cannot bear to be embarrassed in public.

*

"Adena? I thought I released you. Stop working, "Donatella said as she adjusted her fur coat, "Whatever it is can wait until tomorrow," she said to her.

"Are you sure? Because I'm almost done," Adena asked her. She threw herself into her work because she dreaded talking to Taye about the lipstick incident. She needed more time to think and figured she could stay at work until she found the courage and the words to say. She looked at the clock. It was 6:30. She was out of time.

"Honey, go home to that boy of yours," Donatella told her, "I know how much he means to you. Now go clock out," she said.

"Ok," Adena said, forcing a smile. She saved her work, got her things together, clocked out, and locked everything up. She reached home at about 7. She walked to the door and paused before she inserted her key inside the lock. She took a deep breath.

Shake it off, Adena. You can do this.

She sighed and opened the door...to a mess again, but she couldn't find Taye anywhere. She sighed. Great, now she had to wait for him to come home and wait to have a conversation that she would rather not have.

'Where are you?' she texted him.

She could have stayed at work. So she decided to keep herself busy and clean up yet another one of his messes. She then got an idea and started cooking her famous lasagna. It was his favorite. The way to a man's heart was his stomach. Right? However, that took about an hour, and he still wasn't back. She set the table with their favorite china. He still wasn't back. She sighed and covered the food to keep it warm. She entered their bedroom, realizing she was still in her business casual. Then something in her closet caught her eye. A simple black dress, the one he bought her a while back. Damn, when was the last time she got dolled up? New Year's Eve? Maybe this conversation would go better if she felt a little more confident. When her hair and makeup looked good, she felt good. She sprayed herself with her favorite musky perfume. He still wasn't back...

She sighed. She glanced down and accidentally saw the shirt again. She fought against it.

Don't pick it up. Don't look at it.

She picked it up, and there was the lipstick stain. Why couldn't it have been a bad dream? She wished with everything inside her that the lipstick wouldn't be there taunting her. If it had eyes, it would be staring back at her, haunting her. She threw it back in the hamper and picked up her phone. Her text went unanswered. She called him, but it rang and rang and rang, rang, rang. She sighed; she had to leave a voicemail. "Hey baby," she said to him as calmly as she could, though a side of her wanted to cuss him out, "I cooked your favorite lasagna...just finished. Just wondering where you are...call me...love you," she said and hung up.

She then returned to the kitchen, poured herself some wine, sat at the table, and waited.

*

Sometimes, Capricorn longs to let go a little and to allow themselves to join in on the fun – let their toes tap in time with the music. But usually, a sense of duty and a terrible fear of looking foolish stop them from acting out their desires.

*

And waited...

Adena sighed as she poured the rest of the wine into her glass. She drank it all herself, waiting for him. It was almost 10 pm. Taye still wasn't back?! Where the hell was he? Was he out with his other girl, playing video games, drinking beer, and eating greasy pizza? Like a fucking frat boy!?

She got up angrily and staggered to the kitchen, carrying her full wine glass. She took a big gulp. If there weren't so much, she would have chugged it all. She put it down and started to put the food away. She didn't have the strength to eat, and she could only stomach a few bites. Her stomach was doing Olympic-worthy somersaults right now. She put the lasagna in the fridge and then stood there and drank some more, "How...dare he..." she said to herself. She hated the waiting. She was tired. She just wanted to make up and say sorry...she just wanted to talk. Now that she had alcohol in her system, she knew exactly what to say.

She picked up her phone, went into the bedroom, and looked at herself in the mirror on her vanity. The phone rang and rang and rang again. Voicemail. She sighed and called again. Maybe he didn't care because he didn't know how urgent this was. It rang and rang and rang. Voicemail. She called a third time, and it went to voicemail again.

Beep.

"Taye. Where are you? I - I don't know what to think. You missed dinner. I finished all the wine. I'm drinking, for God's sake—the whole bottle. You know me, I don't even drink like that. So there must be something wrong...right? Right. At the most, I have half a glass of wine usually! You're changing, Taye. You changed, and you're making me change too. Why can't things be the way they used to be? What happened to us? What happened to you? You used to be a workaholic. A workaholic who didn't want me to work at all, and now I'm the one working my ass off. You never went to clubs and bars that much, but now I'm waiting all night for you to come home with lipstick stains on your shirt! Yeah, I saw it. So bring your ass home so you can explain it..." she said as she turned around and started to walk toward the bathroom but then stopped and looked at their bed. "Remember our first night? In our bed. In our place. Remember our first night on our honeymoon? How good you made me feel? Damn, I mean...how great you made me feel. You made me feel like a whole new girl...a woman," she said as she lay on the bed and closed her eyes. "Please tell me you haven't made another girl feel like that? That feeling belongs to me...you...you...belong...to...me," she said.

And before she knew it, she passed out, phone in hand...

*

Capricorns are also secret romantics who want a perfect and secure love in their lives.

*

Taye sighed as he tried to close the door quietly. It creaked. Damn it. He forgot to fix that. The lights were still on, so Adena was still up. Fuck. He hoped she was in a good mood, but if she had been waiting for him...She probably was going to be pissed, like always. He took off his shoes and left them in the foyer. He tiptoed to the kitchen and went to turn out the light. He saw the table set for two and an empty bottle of wine sitting out. Hmm...

He turned off the light and walked into the bedroom. Those lights were still on too. Geesh, Dena, our electric bill is gonna be through the roof, he thought. He could picture her in her favorite pj's, reading a book in bed, and when he walked in, she would give him the most condescending look. The look he always hated but could never tell her he did. He took a deep breath and walked in, ready for another argument. He had some beer and even smoked weed, which he hadn't done since college, so he was in a laid-back mood.

He didn't know what to expect but chuckled at what he saw. Adena was sleeping like a baby on the bed. It was still made, and she wore his favorite black dress and heels. Shit. Were they supposed to go somewhere? He saw the full wine glass on the vanity. He walked into the bathroom and turned out the lights. He then walked back in and just looked at her. She looked so cute. Peaceful. She should stay that way. He needed her to stay that way. He pulled back some of the covers, prepared to undress and tuck her in. However, she woke up. Damn, it...

"Sorry," he said quickly. But surprisingly, she didn't look mad. She somehow looked different.

"You're back," she said with a smile. She sat up until she was up on her knees on the bed. She pulled his face to hers and kissed him passionately. He hesitated for half a second and then moaned into the kiss. Shit. What has gotten into her?

"What's gotten into you?" he asked her as he pulled away. He tasted the wine on her lips but she couldn't have had that much?

Someone didn't check their voicemail...

"Nothing has gotten into me, and you haven't gotten into me lately either. I miss you," she said as she unbuttoned his shirt and kissed him on the neck, "When was the last time we...?"

Fuck. "I don't know...but I'm guessing that's gonna change, isn't it?" he asked her in shock. Holy shit. It was Dena! Dena was back!! She finally came back!!! The girl he married, the girl he fell in love with. Not Adena, the bossy mother figure that was never satisfied. Oh God, he missed this! This was fucking sexy! He let her take his shirt off, and she started to undo his belt. She let his pants slip to the floor. "Wait, baby...it's your turn," he said as he pulled her close into a hug. He unzipped her dress and let it fall. She wasn't wearing a bra, but she was wearing a black lacy thong...and heels. Yes! Perfect.

He scooped her up, and she laughed out loud. Very loud. "Baby, shhh," he laughed.

He positioned himself over her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. Then pulled him closer. "I'm sorry for everything...now I'm gonna make it up to you," she said.

He kissed her, even though he didn't know what she was apologizing for, exactly. He was just really happy...and hard about this. He kissed her passionately, down her neck, chest, stomach, and belly button, and then slipped off her thong but still left her heels on...

*

Saturn rules the zodiac sign of Capricorn, so anyone whose birth chart has a strong Capricornian influence will tend to take life seriously.

*

https://youtu.be/axsD7jMteCE