It was hard to make out where the sky ended and where the battleground began. The handful of torches did nothing to the darkness spanning throughout the vast fields of Kurukshetra. Everything felt so quiet and dead, even though the place was teeming with life and sound. 

Advaita took a deep breath. There was a reason they had chosen this place for the forthcoming war. King Kuru, one of the more prominent members of the Kuru clan, had received two boons from Lord Vishnu about this land. First one, the land would always remain holy and renowned by his name, hence Kurukshetra. And the next one, Advaita snorted, thinking about it. The second boon was that anyone who died in battle on this land would be free from all their worldly sins and reach heaven. Considering fratricide was one of the greatest sins of all, this second boon was a real necessity for her family members. Since they still wanted to get to heaven after all the kin they were going to kill in this godforsaken war. No, this wasn't a godforsaken war; the gods specifically wanted this war. She touched the soil of the blessed land and was lost in a string of thoughts.

 "Something told me I'd find you here." 

It took Advaita a few moments to figure out where the voice came from. The blanket of darkness wasn't helping either. She reached for the dagger strapped to her waist, not sure who exactly the voice belonged to. Karna was the last person she expected to see when she turned around. His voice seemed to have changed over the past decade, or did it change under the stress of the upcoming war? Advaita didn't have the answer to that. The only thing she knew was that she had disappointed him. He had given up his freedom to save her life, and she had escaped for the ever-mighty love. In the greater scheme of things, which seemed really trivial. 

"I need to talk to you," he said in an urgent voice. The princess didn't know what to say. Their last conversation hadn't ended on amicable terms, and she didn't know how to begin this one.

 "Advaita, are you listen-- "

"You said you never wanted to talk to me; never see me. Ever. What changed?" she said, cutting him off mid-sentence.

 "I spoke with your mother, umm, the Queen." He stuttered. Never in her wildest dreams did she imagine Karna stuttering. He continued speaking, eyes cast downward, "before coming—before leaving Hastinapur. She told me everything. And my world—" he couldn't finish the sentence. Instead of words, Advaita heard a choked sob. This wasn't the warrior she had met or the brother she'd found all those years ago. This wasn't the warrior that could rival even the divinities if his skills were insulted, and at that moment, she knew exactly what her mother had done. In a desperate attempt to save her sons, the dowager queen had plunged Karna into an ocean of dilemma. The minuscule amount of hate that she had felt the day her mother had asked to share Panchali among her five brothers bubbled up into something bigger.

By then, Karna was slumped on the ground, silent tears flowing down his cheeks. Advaita sat down beside him and caressed his head. "I tried to warn you," she said in a calming voice.

"All those years, hating them, hating Arjun, where did it get me? Vowing to kill my own—someone that I was supposed to grow up with? Someone who was supposed to be my playmate? Own family?" He let out a deep sigh, "My brother, my Arjun. How shall I ever kill him?" Karn sniffled a sob, "How shall I ever kill the one that is supposed to stay here?" He pointed at his heart.

 Advaita didn't know what to say, and they sat in silence until Karna chose to speak again. There was a distant sound of hammering—probably some worker keeping some extra weapons prepared. He looked in that direction and said, "She promised me the throne." Now this caught her completely off guard, even more than his breakdown. Everything always came back to that cursed throne, didn't it? Always. Their whole lives. And lives of those that loved them. It was like a blight, spreading through the family, the kingdom, and the country until they were all tangled in a dance. In a feverish dance of lust, anger, greed, desire, ego, jealousy, blood, flesh... Until it ate them up from inside and wore their skins holding daggers at each other's throats but only hurting themselves. Everything for the power that came with a piece of furniture moulded from a lump of gold. She wanted to scream and shout and gouge her eyes out before she had to witness any more of this destruction. 

 "She told me that if I changed my loyalties and fought for your side, she'd let everyone know I was her son. And as the oldest, the throne would be mine. This way none of us will have to die." He said in his usual calm, collected voice that the previous turmoil from the breakdown was in control now.

"Since we are here now, like this, I take it you didn't accept her proposal?"

Karna looked up at the sky and sighed, "I told her I wouldn't fight with any of them except Arjun. And if one of us dies, she'll still officially have five sons."

Advaita nodded grimly, seeing the morbid reason behind his words. This was a new low from her mother. Karna sighed. The wronged son was easily prepared to forgive their mother but not the righteous daughter. Karna deserved to know the truth; Advaita had always believed that. But springing it on him before the war was a low move. She was disappointed in her mother; nothing the woman did made her see motherly love anymore. She only saw a general arranging the troops. She missed being close to her mother. But this wasn't about her; this was about him. "She didn't think of protecting you before, when you actually didn't have means to protect yourself," she said.

 "How could you say that? She was young; she didn't know better. Moreover, I could always protect myself; my father made sure of that. I understand what you mean, but I'm not angry with her for abandoning me, Advaita. I'm just disappointed that she didn't get to know me more. She doesn't think much of me, does she? Otherwise she wouldn't think my worth is a mere, golden seat."

Advaita sighed, "I wish I could forgive her for abandoning you. I wish I could think like you too. I'll probably end up in the wrong side of history then. Wrong side of this war." 

Karna snorted, "You are obviously going to say that, aren't you? You all think you are the flagbearers of dharma." 

"And what makes you think we aren't? We are blessed by the divinities. We have a duty of cleansing Aryavart of adharm."

"Even the asurs were blessed by the divinities, dear sister." Karna got up from his position on the ground and put some distance between them. The war had taken its toll on everyone and was showing. They hadn't been able to keep up an amicable conversation for long. That wasn't surprising but the way Advaita talked was. It reminded him of Arjun, of Duryodhan. No wonder they were related. 

"You are acting so righteous; you... define dharma, justice to me, Advaita, can you?" Advaita was about to repeat the definition of dharma she had learnt ages ago in the gurukul when Karna started speaking again, "Do you think it will be justice if I abandon my friend in his time of need? The friend that provided me with a sense of identity, a platform when everyone else was looking down on me? Do you think that will save my soul, abandoning him? It won't. I am doomed either way. At least this way I am repaying back my friend's kindness." His voice shook at the end, and Advaita didn't speak either.

The silence stretched on for a long while till Karna broke it. His voice was calm and composed, like usual. "I saw your children previously. They are beautiful. Why are you letting them fight?" There was a sad look on Advaita's face. "They are fighting to prevent injustice in their future. Its not up to me to stop them or anyone in that matter," she shrugged. Karna chuckled, "You know I had this far-fetched fantasy that our children would be great friends, close, and now they are going to face each other in battle. I wish we were not fighting this war," he sighed. 

Advaita took his hand in hers and said, "Don't fight. At least you listen to me. Some lives will be spared then. Please don't fight." Her beautiful, kohled eyes were tear-stricken.

Karna chuckled, "I am not fighting. Your grandfather said he won't fight if a "lowborn" like me is present. So I am sitting it out."

"You?" Advaita said, bewildered, "You who have won so many victories are sitting out the most important battle because someone's misunderstanding of your birth? You, who clearly are one of the best in the whole world?"

"Your grandfather is a respected man, a great warrior; I do not wish to undermine him just to prove myself." Advaita chuckled on hearing that. The Karna she knew always wanted to prove himself, prove his competence. Now, he really sounded mature.

Karna stood up and said, "Come with me; I want you to meet someone."

"I cant go to your camp; someone will definitely see me-"

"Everyone is asleep, and do you think the foot soldiers know every damned royal in these fields? Just follow me." Advaita got up and followed Karna. No one noticed her as Karna led her to a particular tent. The warriors still valued their honour and knew the camps wouldn't be attacked in the middle of the night. 

Karna led Advaita into a big tent, and in the dim lights of the lanterns, she saw a little child about five years old fast asleep on a pile of cushions. "My youngest, Vrishaketu," Karna said, carressing the child's head. "Why is he here? Its not safe for a child to be here!" Advaita exclaimed and Karna smiled. "He can't sleep without me. He has never slept without me."

Advaita felt a burning sensation at the back of her eyes. How many children would lose their sleep, their fathers, for this war?

"If something happens to -"

Karna didnt get the chance to complete his sentence as he saw his sister pick up the child on her lap and kiss his head. " He is very thin, send him to Dwarka to me, I'll make him healthier in a matter of days."

In that moment to Advaita, to Karna and to the little sleeping child there was no impending doom of a war. Just a normal family talking. Just an aunt asking to to take care of her nephew. And it almost felt like peace. 

A.N: I am a horrible person because I literally can't write but if you get time do read.