𝐈. Anecdote of the Pig, Tory Adkisson. 𝐈𝐈. The Seer, Mírëala of Númenor. 𝐈𝐈𝐈. Invocation to St Ashley, Lauren Milici. 𝐈𝐕. We All Crucifix Ourselves in Our Own Ways, K.L. 𝐕. A letter to Boris Pasternak, Marina Tsvetaeva. 𝐕𝐈. Eurydice, Sarah Rhul. 𝐕𝐈𝐈. /. 𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈. The Women of Troy, Euripides. 𝐈𝐗. Lake Mungo, Joel Anderson. 𝐗. A Letter to Liv Ullmann, Ingmar Bergman. 𝐗𝐈. Wishbone, Richard Siken. 𝐗𝐈𝐈. starpeace, Tumblr. 𝐗𝐈𝐈𝐈. /. 𝐗𝐈𝐕. /. 𝐗𝐕. /. 𝐗𝐕𝐈. The Oresteia, Aeschylus.

"Oh God! Oh God! / I want to do things.
Stop turning me into a saint."

𝕸írëala's dearest friend has always been death's cold embrace. There is not much to say to soften the blow of this truth; so we let it stand on its own.

The story of how Mírëala of Nowhere became Mírëala of Númenor is short, of little importance, and its themes are redundant. For a lost child, carried by the sea to a ship captain can only grow into a lonely woman, and this, despite the efforts of her rescuer and family. The tragedy of being out of place is not so easily thwarted.

But oh, there are worse ways to be cursed, and Mírëala knew all of them.

Nothing that has come to pass, or will, is unknown to her. It came as naturally as breathing, as she grew up. The visions, the odd phrases. But her power is not an object of respect, not even fascination from afar. That had always been the tragedy of men; Mírëala knew this, too. It was always easiest to hate something they do not understand, and the truth coming out of a woman's mouth had seemed such an odd conception. She had learned not to care, because while they kicked and cried that she enjoyed the Queen's trust in her and used it to curse them, Mírëala knew that, sooner or later, their retribution would come.

She cannot escape that fact, nor can anyone around her; Mírëala knows.

A god had kissed her eyelids shut and spoken fate in her ears, and Mírëala has always known of the future and its untimely death. Everyone's – her own, too. Her father's, her brother's, her sister's, Mírëala knew years before her mother passed that she would go. The forecast, the way your wife escaped the shackles of marriage, the way your husband disrespected them, the sea and its tempests, Mírëala knows, knows, knows.

Everything, except when it comes to Halbrand of the Southlands.

After a fateful meeting on her father's boat – a boat, the whispering and conspiring of the stars had told her to be on – Mírëala faces, for the first time, a brick wall. Nothing comes to her; not of his past, not of his future. Only his present that she shares, and the shadow of a teal dress soaked with blood.

What kind of renewal of the self, what kind of murder of the past justifies such an abrupt death that Mírëala cannot see it, that Mírëala cannot know him? Maybe the answer starts where she was born, where she comes from. Maybe it ends in Middle-Earth, under soot, blood, and the sounds of a battlefield roaring in her ears. The meeting of Halbrand means the loss of her own self, something she does not know yet, but will.

Because Mírëala's past was of little importance; her future had always been the key to everything. That fateful meeting – in it, she can see the ending, her ending, and cannot escape it. Neither can she the treason to come. She can only watch herself walking willingly into it; the innocence of a lamb devoted to its killer. Betrayal as slaughter of the lover.

What kind of destiny, of grim fate, calls to this blood-soaked sacrifice by the hand of her monstrous guilt? Mírëala of Númenor will know this, too.

And what she can do to make it count.

Emily Bader ⸻
𝕸írëala of 𝕹úmenor / The 𝕾eer

"Sometimes you get so close to someone – /
you end up on the other side of them."

Charlie Vickers ⸻
𝕳albrand of the 𝕾outhlands / A 𝕾elf 𝕱ulfilling 𝕻rophecy

Morfydd Clark, Galadriel of Lothlórien
Lloyd Owen, Elendil of Númenor
Max Baldry, Isildur of Númenor
Ema Horvath, Eärien of Númenor

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Manipulation, violence, graphic depiction of injury, suicide, suicidal thoughts, torture, main character death.

DEDICATIONS: veedeity, cosmicoswalds, -My-Queen-, Redoba, -allonsy, pizzafrenchfry, satinberries, teaganthecheese, TheDarkFlame, _carlgrimesgf <33

by meg<3

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Oh my god hi ... to cope with JJKat drought I've decided to make it worse for myself <3

Okay; I'm sorry Tolkien for what I'm about to do ,, while this fanfiction is kind of stretching the limits of the redemption he had in mind for a certain Eye, I will still abide by his one ask of no smut in LotR universe !!! Applaud me because Halbrand made it hard (no one make the obvious joke .)

Now; I fear this is more of a bittersweet "you can't fix people you can only love them" more than a "I can fix him" fanfiction, some people are just doomed by the narrative and love is not a Great Healer, at least not here. But! It is still somehow about love. As in Mírëala is loved, not used, or manipulated,, the love is genuine which is what makes it sad :((  but also the love is there!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Also; because you cannot escape the deep Christian undertones of LotR or Tolkien's criticism of it, there will be religious imagery and I'll add my own criticism of it in there (It's not like, fuck you and your religion because literally I could not care less if you believe in god or not, and my own personal opinion is that I like that it's a comforting thought!! ,, more like how far can you go for faith,, what limits are you willing to cross, and the injustice of god (who here is Eru Ilúvatar) watching it all unfold knowing how it ends because ooooo does that fuck me up as a thought)

OOOO and just, side note; I've kind of erased the fact that in the series women can go to war and also reestablished the misogyny (in the world of men at least,,, elves and dwarves are exempt) that's in universe because . well it's very good to have women fight wars without undermining them, and I'd be hypocritical to say that we don't need to see that more often because it pisses off dudebros,,, but most of all I felt like that just nerfed Éowyn's entire character, like the "No man can kill me" / "I am No Man" scene is just ... pointless if women had always been able to join the war effort ... ?

Lastly and just as a little fun fact, Mírëala is pronounced "Mir - ee - ala" by everyone BUT the Elves, who pronounce it "Mir - eh - ala", with a rhotic "r", which is actually the right way to pronounce it since it's an Elven name but ooooo linguistics courses you have come back to haunt me

Anyway, here's my Mírëala (Kassandra of Troy, Lamb to the Slaughter, The Good Witch) and The Writing on the Wall, I hope you'll like it!!!!!